The Bear Who Loved Me (8 page)

Becca didn't react. She couldn't even process the words. That didn't seem to be a problem for Officer Tonya, though.

“Abductions, Carl? And when in the hell were you going to tell me about it?”

“I just found out yesterday!” he snapped. Then he frowned. “Er, two days ago.”

“You could have—”

“It was just the wolves east of here. Even Bryn thought it might be coincidence. You know there are always a few who shift and never come back. I honestly thought the wolf was being paranoid. You know how he loves conspiracy theories.”

Becca abruptly found her voice. “And what do you think now?”

Carl grimaced. “I think we need to find those other three bastards. They had a net. They weren't some yahoos out on a drunken hunting party. They were coordinated and they had a net.”

Alan's voice was low with horror. “They wanted to capture Justin. Why?”

“Bryn thinks they're being studied.”

“Studied?” Becca gasped. “Like rats in a cage? Like why you can shift into a bear and we can't?”

“Yes.”

“And you think they've taken Theo?”

He didn't answer, but when he met her gaze, fear was in his eyes.

Which is when Becca lost what little was left in her stomach.

T
here wasn't anything he could do to help Becca. Carl sat in the living room listening to the woman losing not only her lunch, but her dignity, too. No one threw up with class. It was a violent physical reaction to the horror she'd been through in the last forty-eight hours. And there was nothing he could do to ease her pain.

So he sat there listening, his guts twisting as he scrambled for a way to make it better. There wasn't anything except all the things he'd already planned. Mobilize the clan, the police, and all his resources to find Theo. Contact the other alphas and find out if Bryn's pack was the only one noticing a problem or if there was more to the story. And do that all without unduly alarming his own people or accidentally revealing themselves to a dangerous someone who might just start the very thing he feared: scientific study by a militant faction of baddies.

In other words, it was his normal day as an alpha. The only difference here was that Becca was ten feet away being emotional and physically torn apart by his world.

He looked at Tonya. Her gaze was on the bathroom, too, but her expression wasn't sympathetic. He could almost hear her brain shifting Becca from “Possible Threat” to “Too Weak to Survive.” As a cop, Tonya couldn't afford to babysit the weak. She was too busy defending them from motorcycle psychos with nets. And true to form, she turned away from the bathroom and flicked on her smartphone. A moment later she was showing him a digital map of the area.

“Here's what I've got in place,” she said as she rattled off people who were all part of the Gladwin clan safety net and their locations. “It's everyone and I can't think of anything more to do.”

“I can,” he said, as he grabbed his tablet. He stared at the electronic device, knowing just how to access the information he needed. But his heart and mind weren't there. He was in the bathroom wishing he had the right to comfort Becca. The need was a physical ache right behind his breastbone.

“Fuck the right,” he grumbled to himself. He didn't need permission. He needed the tools to ease her pain, and in that he was sorely lacking. He just didn't know what to say. So he left the nurturing to his fully human brother, Alan, and became the Maximus the clan needed.

“Here's who we need to contact and what we're going to get from them,” he said as he pulled up a map of Michigan that marked all the shifter clans and their territories.

He started outlining his plan. It took ten minutes for Tonya to get the full scope and another two before she was out the door implementing his thoughts. Add in another twenty to get a snarling Mark on the phone and to set his nearly feral best friend on his job. Next came calling all the shifter alphas nearby and waking them at dawn to probe into sensitive areas about how they manage their young. And once that was done, he had to ask for their help. Not the easiest task, especially since diplomacy wasn't a typical grizzly strength.

And he did it all while keeping half an eye on Becca, constantly searching her for clues about her thoughts and feelings.

The hours ground away. Phone call after logistical meeting after Internet call. It was all needed and tedious in the extreme. Especially since every response was in the negative. No, they hadn't lost any young that they'd admit, though a few teens were not currently in sight. No, they hadn't seen Theo, but would do their best to contain the youth safely if they did. And no, they would not support any grizzly incursion on their territory without proper assurances, etc., etc.

It was the assurances that took the bulk of his time.

That and keeping himself aloof as Becca seemed to shrink into herself, growing more panicked with every passing moment. She was about to break, and everyone knew it. Alan had been alternately feeding her and encouraging her to rest. The doctor had visited and given her a sleeping aid, which she didn't take. Even Tonya had let her speak to the Kalamazoo police as they detailed what they were doing to locate Theo without anyone mentioning shape-shifting.

And now it was nearly three. His body was an allover ache from his injuries and his stomach alternated between ravenously hungry and queasy from the lingering sedatives of those damn darts. The last reports had come in negative for Theo and even Justin had woken with no news. All the kid remembered was walking home as a bear and then waking up in his bedroom as a man. Which left them doing nothing more than sitting around waiting for more reports and praying for good news.

Which is when Becca finally broke.

He'd just gotten off the phone with Bryn and was dreading having to report more non-news when he saw Becca drawing on her coat, her lips flattened into a hard line of determination. The man in him braced for an argument while his contrary bear cheered her attitude. Bears generally didn't balance pros and cons in a logical fashion. Anything that smacked of action had them cheering. Usually as a bystander as someone else went impulsively into destruction, but no one ever accused a grizzly of being a deep thinker. It was his job as Maximus to manage the two halves. And at this moment, the meant keeping Becca calm.

Coward that he was, he looked around for Alan. Sadly, the man was out doing all the things that Carl was letting slip while coordinating the search for Theo. Which meant it was up to him to see that Becca didn't do something stupid.

“Going out for a walk?” he asked. “I could use a stretch, too. Let me grab my coat and I'll join you.”

“What? Um, no.” Her eyes skated away from his, and he realized she was standing next to the wall where all the keys hung. Sure enough, his truck keys were missing and he'd lay odds she had them tucked into her tiny hand.

He stood, making sure to go slowly, as if he were much more wounded than he actually was. No sense being injured and not playing the please-nurse-me card. Of course, since he actually was hurt, he didn't have to pretend the wince of pain as he straightened. “Tonya's going to check in soon.” Not for a couple hours actually, but he was still in the business of delaying Becca until they knew more. “And Mark could show up any minute. He's sneaky in his own way. He may have news that no one else does.”

She took a deep breath and met his gaze squarely.

Uh-oh.

“Look,” she said, her voice tight. “I know you think you're doing the right thing. No one could say you weren't pulling out all the stops.”

“Theo is one of us. Of course I'd throw all my resources—”

“That's just it,” she stressed. “There's no evidence that Theo is one of you. He's never…changed. Not like you guys. We're just normal people. We don't…
Mad Max
is just a movie, you know?”

He did know. He also knew that she had bravely faced down three guys with guns, which made her the rarest of rare: a normal person with
hero
inside. But even heroes had to get past a healthy, rational denial of magic.

“So what's the plan here, Becca? Where you going with my truck?”

“I'm going home, Carl. Back to Kalamazoo, where Theo is probably playing video games with some new friend and he's forgotten to call.”

“Does that sound like Theo?”

She looked away. Of course it didn't. “This isn't my world,” she said, the words choking out of her. “We're not part of it. So I'm going home, where he'll be at the bakery studying.”

“Wouldn't Stacy have called if he was there?”

She turned toward the door, her shoulders rigid with stubbornness. “Maybe she's busy with customers.”

Damn it, she was bolting for sure. “You don't believe that. You just don't want to believe this, either.”

She froze, and he knew he'd hit on the truth. “I can't just sit here. I can't just do nothing.”

“What would you do at home?”

She shrugged, the ghost of a smile curving her lips. “Bake. And worry.”

“So bake here.”

She shook her head. “There's no point. It's just what I do when I can't think of something more useful.” Her gaze turned, tortured. “Do you really think Theo's been…taken by those…thugs?”

He wanted to lie to her, but he could already tell that she wouldn't accept a pat response. If she did, Alan would have calmed her down hours ago. So he crossed to her and stroked her arm.

“I think Theo takes after his aunt.”

“What does that mean?”

“I think he's going to surprise us all. I'm going to find him, Becca, but I'll lay odds that when I do, he'll be a long way to rescuing himself.”

“So you think he needs rescuing?”

“Don't we all? At one time or another?”

She slugged him weakly in the chest. “You're spouting greeting card philosophy and I'm barely holding it together here.”

He grabbed her wrist and used it to reel her in. She came easily, needing the comfort as much as he needed to give it. She was such a tiny thing in his arms. Normal-sized for a woman, but he was on the huge side, even for grizzly shifters. And when she tucked her face against his chest, wetting his shirt with her tears, he marveled at how perfect this felt. Not the fear or the taut clench of her hands in his flannel shirt, but the inaudible click in his head as they synced together. Tiny as she was, she filled his arms. And together, they made a whole that he'd been aching for his entire life.

“Do you know what I remember of last night?” he said against her hair.

“Abject terror?” she asked. Then she moaned. “No, that was me.”

He squeezed her. “It was me, too. The moment I saw you head out for Justin. I kept roaring for you to stay back.”

She shifted in his arms. “Is that what you were doing? I thought—” She cut off her words, but he wouldn't let her get away with that.

“What? Believe me, I've heard it all.”

She winced, and as close as they were, he felt the movement. “I thought you were going to eat him.”

He sighed. Of course she'd think the absolute worst. “I was trying to protect him by standing over him. And you were safest hidden by the tree.”

She shifted back and he reluctantly eased his hold. “So when you're a bear, you can think? Like a man?”

“I think like a bear with simple man words. Protect. Defend.”
Destroy
.

“And you were protecting Justin?”

“I was protecting you both. I knew there was someone in the trees. So when you came out into the open, I had to become more aggressive. I had to take out the threat.”

“Which is why you left us.”

Again, she'd thought the worst. “I didn't know there were more hunters. I only sensed the one man.”

She nodded and stepped farther back. “You thought you were doing the right thing.”

“I
was
doing the right thing,” he huffed. “That guy had a tranq gun. He could have picked us both off and then taken Justin and us without a fight.”

She nodded, and he could see that her mind was telling her the same thing. But inside she was feeling something else entirely. It didn't take a genius to guess what.

“You thought I'd abandoned you.”

She snorted. “I
wanted
you to abandon us. I thought you were trying to eat Justin.”

Ridiculous to feel hurt. She knew nothing of their kind and so of course jumped to all the wrong conclusions. But did she really think he could do that? Even as a bear? “When did you realize the truth?”

She took too long to answer, which told him clear as day that she'd never understood. He'd never abandon her. Not while there was breath in his body.

“I should have called 911 sooner,” she said. “I should have thought before I ran out into the open.”

“You did the bravest thing I've ever seen, Becca. You had no defenses, but you ran out to protect Justin anyway.”

She shook her head. “It was stupid.”

“It was brave. And yeah, next time you're going to have a gun and a cell with 911 on speed dial.” He touched her cheek. “I'll never forget the sight of you crouching down as they were heading toward you. You were going to fight.” He pressed his forehead to hers. “That's when I felt complete terror. I knew I couldn't get to you in time to save you.”

“But you did.”

He nodded. He had. Adrenaline and all that. Plus shifter reflexes. “Don't run, Becca. Not where I can't protect you.”

She jerked as he spoke, lifting her head back and away from him. “I don't need protection. None of this is my fight.”

He could see she wanted to believe that. She needed to hold on to the thought that she could run back to Kalamazoo and none of what had happened in the last two and a half days would follow her. And maybe it was possible. Maybe Theo hadn't gone through his First Change and certainly hadn't been taken by whatever nut jobs were out there chasing down shifter kids. Maybe all of this was a big misunderstanding. But even if that were true, he'd already gone too far to let her go.

“There's something else I have to tell you,” he said, hating that he was backed into another corner, but delaying this wasn't going to help. Which meant he needed to get it out there in the open.

She stiffened, bracing herself for more bad news. “What?”

“I've never gotten distracted like I did last night.” She frowned at him, clearly not understanding. “Even as a teen, I never let a girl pull me away from my responsibilities. Not even once.”

Her gaze canted away. And denied her eyes, he focused on her scent to give him clues as to her feelings. “You're talking about the kiss,” she said, her voice low and her scent wary.

“I'm talking about ten or twenty minutes when I planned to take you in every way possible. I meant to mate with you right there against the tree and nothing—not even Justin—was going to stop me.”

She frowned without looking up. “But you did stop.”

“When there was danger.”