The Best Advice I Ever Got (19 page)

Davis Guggenheim

Academy Award-Winning Film Director and Producer

Don’t Listen to Can’t

You’ve probably heard this one: “Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t.” It’s a big theme in our household. Everything stops when we hear one of our kids say, “I can’t.” We all huddle together and have a big discussion about how anything is possible if you work hard and focus on your goal. But the problem with “Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t” is that so many people in your life
do
. In my life, there were high-school guidance counselors, coaches, friends, and bosses, to name a few. I’m not suggesting that every naysayer is evil. I don’t believe that. It’s just that there are many good-natured types out there who are just doing their job, and in the process they might be saying, “You can’t.”

The truth is, on paper I was one of the most unimpressive kids around. I was a terrible student, listless and unfocused. When I told people that I wanted to become a director, it made sense that many thought, I’m doing this kid a favor if I “adjust” his expectations and point him toward a more “realistic” field. They wanted to let me down easy with well-intentioned advice, which basically amounted to “Don’t reach so high.” The great news is that I also had a few wonderful teachers and my parents, who saw past those low expectations and believed in me.

Here’s my point: It’s not about “not letting” people tell you that “you can’t.” My experience is that they will tell you that, anyway, and you can’t stop them. So my advice is: Don’t listen to them. If you have a strong desire and passion to do something, even when the smart advice is encouraging you to downgrade your expectations, I say don’t listen. Believe in yourself, because with hard work, passion, and persistence you can do anything.

Tyra Banks

Supermodel Turned Super Mogul, Chairwoman and CEO of Bankable

SMIZE … with Your Booty

On the first day of the ninth grade, a girl approached my awkward, skinny, weird-looking, big-foreheaded self and asked a question that would change my life forever: “Are you a model?”

Modeling was the furthest thing from my mind at the time, but these four words piqued my interest and I went about getting signed. I studied my butt off to learn every element of the fashion industry. I researched, investigated, devoured books, magazines, and videos on designers, photographers, models—I took it all in!

After I graduated from high school, Paris was my destination. Terrified but filled with courage and ambition, I pushed through the fears and rejections, like “Sorry, Ms. Banks, we’re not sure if you’re photogenic.” Or the one that I heard more than anything: “We already have a black girl.”

But I kept going after each blow. Why? Because I was getting better and stronger, wiser and more passionate. And in the end my non-photogenic, already-have-a-black-girl, weird-looking-big-foreheaded self booked twenty-five fashion shows that season. My
first
season in Paris. I’ve been told that it was the first and last time a neophyte booked that many shows. And no, it wasn’t because I had the right walk or the look of the moment. I believe I booked that record number of shows because of the studying I put in beforehand. I was prepared! I propelled and fueled my destiny with research, knowledge, and commitment.

Over the years, I became a full-fledged supermodel and accomplished everything that I dreamed of and more. But eventually I realized that I would need to make the ultimate tough decision to walk away from modeling before it “walked away from me.” To retire on top. Then came the question:

“Now what?”

I had many conversations with myself in which I asked, “Tyra, what is your dream—the one thing over all others that you want to accomplish now?”

I answered that burning question with the ultimate, universal fantasy: to become a singing sensation. Oh, yes. I wanted to be a pop star! I recorded countless never-released songs and even self-produced a music video called “Shake Ya Body.” Okay, truth be told I was less interested in actually recording music. All I really wanted to do was “shake my body” in music videos and onstage at Madison Square Garden. I wanted all the accolades, choreography, applause, and exclusive interviews. I even envisioned being interviewed by Katie Couric, who would ask, “Tyra, what was your
inspiration
for this album and the musical movement called SMIZE … with Your Booty?” And, with a hair flip and a twinkle of the eye, I’d reply, “Well, Katie, I’ve already conquered the
SMIZE
—smiling with the eyes, that is—in modeling, and now it’s time for the entire world to experience this auditory masterpiece, and to embody the SMIZE of the cheeks—down there.” Oh, I was
so ready
. Ready to
shine
! Thank God I spared Katie that horrible interview, because my nearly tone-deaf, pitchy, Auto-Tuned, have-access-to-the-best-producers-in-the-world-but-still-sucked-big-time SMIZING butt had to face the real music! I was not meant to be the next Lady Taylor Perry Gaga Swift.

Luckily for me, I faced the truth with honesty and let go of the fantasy of being a singing star. I realized that my joy and passion, combined with my all-consuming focus and work ethic, really was best suited for the world of business. The
business
side of Entertainment, the
business
side of Beauty, the
business
side of Fashion—meshed with all my right-brained strengths: creating, producing, writing! I am an entrepreneur. I am a businesswoman. That is in no way a fantasy; that is my destiny.

And so Bankable was born, and it has been my driving force. With the same commitment to hard work and study that led to my success in modeling, I attend Harvard Business School in order to make my company the best of the best, and to learn how to become a true leader in the world of beauty-meets-entertainment. Today, we’re establishing an innovative and inspiring corporate culture that is vibrant, humorous, and highly creative. Our employees have fun and thrive, and our mantra is our mission: to truly expand the definition of beauty worldwide.

Now that’s true destiny, no Auto-Tune required—just pure acoustic harmony.

Destiny is born out of our true gifts, which each of us must focus on, investigate, and invest in. It is not born out of foolish fantasy. As I’ve learned over the years, destiny can become reality only when we step back, examine ourselves and our motives, and think of what we are
truly
willing and capable of dedicating our soul, our spirit, our lives to.

So search for your own destiny—a destiny that’s real—and make sure you master how to
SMIZE
with your booty while finding it.

Salman Rushdie

Bestselling, Award-Winning Author of Eleven Novels, Including
Midnight’s Children
and
Luka and the Fire of Life

Angela’s Asterisks

When I was a young, unpublished, struggling writer in London in the mid-1970s, I met the great British fantasist, feminist, eccentric, and all-around wonderful woman Angela Carter. She was the first writer who spoke to me as an equal, encouraged me to keep at my writing, and gave me a little much-needed self-belief. Her finest literary advice boiled down to five pithy words, one of them obscene:

“F*** the lot of them.”

It is advice I have tried to follow ever since.

Colin Powell

Four-Star General and Sixty-fifth United States Secretary of State

It Doesn’t Matter Where You Start

I graduated from the City College of New York fifty-two years ago. They were glad to see me go, with my 2.0 average, hoping the Army could do something with me. I am now considered one of the greatest sons of City College and they name things after me. So it doesn’t matter where you start in life but where you finish and, along the way, whether you do something that you love and enjoy doing. Never settle for anything less than what you love doing and do well.

Laura Linney

Award-Winning Film, Television, and Theater Actress

Never Read Your Own Reviews

In life, you will inevitably encounter criticism. Never, ever read your own reviews. Good ones or bad ones. It is not a critic’s job to tell you how to feel about your own work. That is your responsibility alone. Never allow anyone to tell you how to feel about your work. Or limit your view of yourself or of who you are.

The most interesting artists are those who aren’t too afraid to fail. As the late great Jack Lemmon once said, “Failure seldom stops you. What stops you is the fear of failure.” You will never achieve a deeper understanding of your work, or learn the tough lessons, if you are liked or comfortable all of the time.

Martha Stewart

Lifestyle Expert, Bestselling Author, and Founder of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia

Gather the Good Things

So the pie isn’t perfect? Cut it into wedges. When faced with a challenge, evaluate or assess the situation, gather the good things in sight, abandon the bad, clear your mind, and move on. Focus on the positive. Stay in control, and never panic.