Read The Blogger and the Hunk Online
Authors: Jane Matisse
Tags: #humor, #comedy, #romance, #romantic comedy, #blog, #wit, #sweet romance, #contemporary, #women's fiction
“Which is why she decided to free you from having to be her maid of honor in the first place. She didn’t do it to hurt you. In all actuality, I should be the one who should feel a little hurt at being second-best.”
Penelope shook her head. “Don’t. She loves you. You’re her best friend, and I completely understand why she chose you in the first place.”
“That might be the first compliment you’ve given me while sober.”
Penelope laughed. “Shut up.” She got up from the chair, and Jack took the glass from her hand. “I need to go back home and shower.”
“That an invitation?”
Penelope raised her eyebrow as a silent warning.
Jack chuckled, holding his hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry.”
“I’ll trade you your clothes for mine.”
“I don’t know. I kind of like you in my sweats and T-shirt.” He grinned. “Last one. I promise.”
Penelope gave a snort. “Yeah, right. Come on. Hand me my dress.” She held out her hand.
“I put it in the wash. I’ll go get it.”
Penelope couldn’t help herself from looking at the man’s naked back. Too bad he was wearing sweats. He had one gorgeous butt. She couldn’t help but sigh.
God, please help me.
* * *
“H
ow did you get home last night?” Stephanie asked as soon as she walked into Penelope’s apartment.
“I seriously need to change my locks,” Penelope muttered, knowing that her friend had possession of a spare key.
“So?” Jasmine asked, helping herself to an unopened Coke bottle in the refrigerator.
Penelope slowly dried her wet hair with the towel, buying herself some time. “Well, I didn’t come home.”
Her friends looked confused.
Penelope sighed and explained. “Apparently I got too drunk last night and Jack promised Celeste he was going to bring me home, but turns out I was too drunk for him to leave me alone so we ended up staying at his place instead.” She took a deep breath, trying to get the story all out before they decided to make too much of it. “Now, who wants cookies? I’ve got some in the kitchen. I’ll go get—”
“Wait a freaking minute!” Jasmine exclaimed, her eyes as huge as saucers. “He took you to his place?”
“Details, details!” Stephanie exclaimed, pulling Penelope back onto the sofa.
“Hey, there’s nothing to say. He took me to his place, I fell asleep on his bed, and woke up alone to find him in the kitchen with a glass of green mush in his hands.” She purposely left out the fact that he had teased her shamelessly about being in his clothes.
“You’ve got to be kidding. No sexy time?”
“No kissing?”
“Not even cuddling?” Jasmine exclaimed, feigning hyperventilation.
“No, none of that. He was just being nice. I think we might have a truce. We have the potential of being friends,” Penelope tried explaining, hoping it would be the end of the conversation. Wishful thinking.
“Who the fuck wants to be only friends with him? He’s a GOD, Penelope. You only get to talk to a guy like him once in a lifetime. And you even got to sleep with him!”
Penelope was sure she was going to faint any second with the amount of blood that was going through her body. She got up to head over to the kitchen, thinking they would take the hint and stay put. No such luck.
“I didn’t get a chance to ask you,” Stephanie began, walking into the kitchen, Jasmine following right behind her. “Does he have a big cock?”
Penelope smacked her face with her palm. This could not be happening. Out of her friends, she knew she was the least experienced in matters of the bedroom. She’d never thought the day would come when her friends would be asking her to spill the details of her one night. “You guys! Nothing happened last night. Nothing! I fell asleep. And even if we had done anything, which we didn’t, I wouldn’t remember a thing. That’s how passed out I was.”
Her friends frowned playfully. “Can I have him then?” Jasmine asked, wiggling her eyebrows.
“Look, if you want him, by all means, go at him. Just, please, do it after the wedding. I don’t need a scorned lover crying in the pews of the church while my sister is repeating her vows.”
There was a sudden knock on the door.
Thank the Lord, I am saved,
Penelope thought. She left her friends at the kitchen table and rushed to open the door. She immediately regretted her decision when she realized who was on the other side.
* * *
“M
iss me?” Jack grinned from ear to ear.
Several emotions crossed Penelope’s face before she responded. “What are you doing here?”
Jack pushed right past her to enter her apartment. It was simple and neat, which he thought looked rather boring. There was not a single spot in the place where she did not have at least one book. On the shelves above her TV, the bookshelves on the wall to the far corner, a few books on the small table next to the sofa. Jesus, it was as if he had walked into a librarian’s house. Did she work at the library? Maybe that’s why she was so stuffy. Or was she an aspiring author? Whichever it was, he certainly did love seeing her flustered whenever he was around.
She was attracted to him, of that he was positive. That one night they’d spent together, she’d been turned on. And he was right there willing to make her feel good. Sex, he understood, but the attraction he had to her confused him. He looked down at the short, curvy woman in front of him. Ordinary brown hair, brown eyes, average breasts, a lightly tanned skin tone, and definitely bigger than a size eight. She was completely different from the girls he was used to taking home. She knew it, he knew it, yet he found himself trying to keep his dick in his pants. He breathed a sigh of acceptance and decided to have a little fun with the woman while he was here.
“What are you doing here? I thought I left you at your place this morning?” Penelope deadpanned.
“Well, I came to pick up my favorite sweats,” he teased. “You know, the ones you took the night you spent in my bed.” This time he lightly tugged on her ponytail.
Before she could retaliate, he heard giggling from what he assumed was the kitchen.
Oh shit. We’re not alone.
Penelope was staring daggers into him. “What do you want?” she asked through clenched teeth.
“I just wanted to let you know, your dear sister has asked us to meet up with her for lunch. She was going to give you a call, but I told her not to worry. So, I offered to pick you up. We’re going to be seeing a lot of each other. Might as well spend time getting comfortable.”
For a moment it looked like she was hesitant. “Oh, well, let me go get my shoes.” She headed off, a frown adorning her brow.
“Ah, so you are the famous Jack,” a gorgeous brunette asked, walking out of the kitchen area, a dirty-blonde right behind her. Jack couldn’t help but notice how attractive Penelope’s friends were. Both could have been models on an issue of
Sports Illustrated
.
“I’m famous? I wasn’t aware of that.” He smirked, ready to turn the charm on them both. There was no harm in flirting.
“Oh, well, your name has popped up on a few occasions,” the blonde replied. “I’m Jasmine, and this is Stephanie,” she stated, pointing at the brunette.
“Very nice to meet you both. I’m hurt that I haven’t met you ladies until now.” He mock pouted.
“Penny has been keeping you all to herself.” Jasmine winked. “Doing what, I just can’t imagine.”
Jack tried to explain. It was no good when the friends knew you had slept with one of their own. “Well, actually—”
Someone cleared their throat in the hallway. All three of them turned to see Penelope with her arms crossed, giving her friends the stink eye. And, my God, she was actually tapping her foot like a cartoon character. “Let’s go. I’m ready.” She walked straight to the door and held it open, waiting for Jack to follow.
Jack walked past the two women and heard Jasmine loudly whispering to Penelope, “Play nice.”
“Use protection!” Stephanie added.
Jack felt a laugh start to build up in his throat, but he was smart enough to stifle it before Penelope lost her temper and decided to take it out on his manhood. Although having her touch him down there didn’t sound like such a bad idea....
He shook his head, trying to ignore the sudden arousal he felt and waited until Penelope was out of her apartment to close the door. She turned to him, waiting to be led to his car, her arms crossed and an annoyed look on her face. He was in for a bumpy ride.
F
riends are traitors. They make you think they’re looking out for you when really, they just want to get rid of you the first chance they get. Doesn’t matter if you don’t want to see a guy again, they trick you into it. I just hope they’re still there for you when the ride is over and you’re a sobbing mess.
DIARY OF A WALLFLOWER: Entry 146
The ride to the restaurant was a quiet one. Jack wasn’t really sure what was eating at Penelope. He had tried making conversation, but she gave only one-word answers. In the end he just decided to give up.
He parked the car and got out, walking around to the passenger door to open it for her, only to find her getting out of the car and shutting the door forcefully.
Yikes, an angry woman. The worst kind.
When he tried opening the door of the restaurant for her, she stood still, waiting for him to enter first. He was having none of that. Jack placed his arm around her shoulders and shoved her inside. Even though she had resisted the whole way, Penelope’s strength couldn’t compete with Jack’s.
“Ladies first,” he insisted, murmuring in her ear.
Penelope huffed for the umpteenth time since Jack had surprised her at her place. He chuckled and looked for Celeste, spotting her at a small booth located at the far end of the restaurant.
“Took you guys long enough. What held you back?” Celeste asked, standing to give her sister a hug.
“Jackie here was busy flirting with my friends,” Penelope snapped. “The man needs to be put on a leash.” She took a seat across from her sister. Jack was about to take a seat next to Celeste when he noticed Penelope had tried to sneakily pull the chair next to her closer to her side and put her tote bag on top of it. It was obvious she didn’t want him anywhere near her.
So, he made an immediate decision to sit next to her instead.
There. Take that!
Penelope looked at him, a little surprised, and tried scooting her chair a bit to leave some space between their bodies.
Well, this is going to be a fun lunch
.
“Everything go all right last night?” Celeste asked offhandedly, obliviously looking down at her menu.
“Nothing happened. I just fell asleep,” Penelope hastily replied. Jack noticed she had suddenly gotten extremely nervous. He realized what she was thinking and silently chuckled.
Celeste looked at her sister over the menu. “I was just asking about you getting home okay, Penny.”
“Oh... well, I got home okay,” she managed while hiding her blushing face in the menu. Jack shook his head and focused on his menu.
The waiter brought their drinks and they ordered their food. For a few minutes there was a long pause before Jack finally broke the silence.
“So, why did you bring us here, Celeste?”
“I have a favor to ask you guys, but I’m not really sure how to ask it without sounding like Bridezilla.”
“What is it?” Jack asked, getting a little irritated with all the stalling.
“I thought, since you are my MOH, you would need Penelope’s help in one aspect of my wedding.”
“And what aspect is that?” Penelope spoke up for the first time.
“My bachelorette party.” She winced.
“Wait, hold on,” Jack stepped in. “I don’t think I should even be a part of
that
aspect of the wedding. I’m a guy. And a straight one at that.”
“I don’t think it would be such a good idea to have us work together on this. I’m pretty sure one of your other bridesmaids would do just fine.”
“See, that’s not what I want. Considering the position Jackie was in at the engagement party with Rosa, I think it’s safe to say I don’t trust him with other girls,” Celeste explained. “At least you wouldn’t be able to seduce my sister even if you tried.”
Jack heard Penelope choke on her water next to him and patted her back, making sure the girl didn’t swallow an ice cube. He just smirked when he noticed how red she was. “Oh, you have no idea,” he muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Penelope to hear and kick him underneath the table. Celeste was too occupied with her glass of red wine to notice.
The waiter came back with their orders and Celeste started again. “Come on, you guys. I don’t know what the big deal is. All you have to do is plan out my bachelorette party. That’s it.”
Penelope sighed. “Fine, I’ll help Jack. And he will graciously plan the event out, without a word,” she quickly added before Jack could object to the idea.
“Good! See, that’s what I like to see. Teamwork!”
“Besides, I’ll make sure to keep an eye on him just in case he starts thinking with his little man around the girls,” Penelope teased, throwing a side glance toward Jack.
“Oh, please! You guys act like I have sex with every chick that walks my way,” Jack responded defensively.
“Only the pretty ones,” Penelope replied. Jack was about to retort when he suddenly had a better idea. He slightly moved his hand under the table and lightly grazed his fingers on her jean-covered thigh. Penelope cleared her throat, but Jack knew she was stifling a gasp. Her leg kicked the table in reflex.
“Are you okay, Penny?” Celeste asked, a little worried.
“I’m fine,” she replied, pinching Jack’s arm. He let out a small yelp, quickly coughing to hide it.
Celeste merely looked at them suspiciously, and continued to eat. Her phone began to play the
Wedding March
.
Ugh
, Jack thought. He noticed that Penelope was making a distasteful face.
“It’s Bryan. I’ll be right back.” Celeste got up from the table, heading for the bathrooms, phone on her ear.
When she was out of sight, Penelope punched his arm.
“Hey! What was that for?”