The Boarding House (34 page)

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Authors: Sharon Sala

BOOK: The Boarding House
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As for her, she was talking to God.

Just so You know, God, this isn’t a prayer. I thought You should know where I am. It’s a hospital for crazy people. My doctor is always asking me, ‘how does that make you feel,’ so now I’m asking You: How does that make You feel? I have prayed all my life and not one time did You answer. Do you see what happened? Do You feel sad for me? Do You feel bad that You didn’t intervene?

Ellie closed her eyes and took a slow, deep breath, making herself calm the rage within. She lived with so much hate on so many levels that sometimes it was hard to just breathe without screaming.

Outside, the wind was rising. She could hear the faint rumble of distant thunder. It was going to rain again, which meant no sunshine, but there was nothing she could do about it.

She thought about the video of her and Momma that she’d seen in Dr. Tyler’s office. Knowing there had been a time in her life when all had been safe and normal gave her a new sense of herself. All along she’d imagined God had just given her to the Devil to do with as he pleased, but that no longer seemed the case. Once upon a time Momma had loved her and taken care of her just like any mother would do. Somewhere along the way Momma had fallen sway to the Devil, just like Ellie. It was a new thing to ponder—that Momma had been a victim, too.

The first raindrops splattered against the windowpanes like water on a hot griddle, hissing and popping as they danced along the surface before exploding in tiny bursts of steam.

Ellie opened her eyes. Rain ran down the outside of the window. Ellie thought about what she’d said to God—asking Him if He was sorry. It occurred to her that it had begun to rain right after she’d asked the question. She stared at the rain as hope began to rise within her. Was this truly her answer? Had God finally given her a sign?

The rain began to come down harder now, blurring vision to the outside world until Ellie felt as if she was looking through a veil of tears. She closed her eyes and began to rock back and forth with excitement. This was her answer. For the first time in her life, she believed this was a sign from God.

He was crying and the raindrops blasting against the windows were His tears.

Ellie clasped her hands against her belly as she continued to rock. The pores were opening in her skin, just like in church when the music of the choir used to fill her soul. She could hear God’s sob in the rumble of the thunder, and when the wind would rise and wail, she heard it as despair. Ellie sat in witness, taking comfort in the knowledge that she was worth the storm of God’s grief. In time, a measure of her anger began to subside. Her shoulders slumped. Her head nodded forward.

Then Wyatt whispered her name. “Ellie.”

She jumped then straightened up in the chair. “What?”

“Momma loved you.”

“I know. I saw it on the movie.”

“We love you.”

“I know that too. I’ve always known that.”

“God loves you.”

Ellie’s voice was just above a whisper. “He’s crying for me, Wyatt. Can you see? He’s crying for me.”

“It’s time for you to love yourself.”

A shudder rolled through her in such a wave that it made her shake. “I don’t know if I can.”

“Are you saying you know more than God?”

She was horrified that he would think that. “No. Never.”

“If He cries for you, then you are allowed to cry for yourself.”

Ellie let the notion settle. She would have to think about all she’d been given today. For now, it was enough to know that God had heard her.

Chapter Twenty-Five
 

Memphis—October

Autumn was coming to Memphis. There was a nip in the air and an internal rush to get summer projects finished and crops laid by. Animals had begun to grow their winter coats and the leaves were just starting to turn. The world was going on without Ellie, whether she liked it or not.

Her therapy sessions with Dr. Tyler were going nowhere. Every time he thought they’d taken a step forward, Ellie put herself two steps back. She was so unwilling to turn loose and trust herself that he was at his wit’s end.

Cinnamon kept telling him the time was coming, and Wyatt subtly threatened him to stop pressuring her. Sophie’s appearances were becoming less and less frequent. He didn’t know if that meant she was getting ready to integrate with Ellie, or just tired of his prattle. He had never bonded with a patient as he had with Ellie Wayne. It wasn’t healthy. It wasn’t even wise. But it was too late for recriminations.

Meanwhile, Moira Ferris was back to square one with Luther Dunn. If it hadn’t been for the constant presence of what was now referred to as Luther’s window, she would have convinced herself that their brief moments of conversation had never happened. As for the times she thought she’d heard his voice in her head, she had chalked that up to the emotion of the moment and completely rejected it.

He had never come back to ask to see Ellie, and Ellie had not asked to talk to Luther, although she spent every moment of her free time sitting in the sunlight with a lapful of colors.

Excitement was at an all-time low at Mind and Body until the morning Ellie woke up and realized Sophie was missing.

It was just after seven-fifteen in the morning. Charlie and Walt were helping a nurse with a bedfast patient who had soiled his sheets during the night.

A visiting psychiatrist was doing rounds for another doctor who was having dental surgery, and one of the janitors was mopping up a stream of urine left behind from a patient who’d been walking the halls. There was nothing remarkable about the morning that would lead them to believe the turmoil that was to come. In fact, it was an uneventful day until a wail of complete despair suddenly sliced through the silence, followed by a long, ear-piercing shriek. It brought everyone within hearing distance out into the hallway trying to find the room and the source.

Then Ellie solved the problem by running out into the hall, screaming. “Sooophie! Sooophie!”

Charlie was the first to reach her, grabbing her by the shoulders. “What’s wrong, Ellie?”

She slid to a stop and dug her fingers into his forearms in frantic desperation. “Sophie’s gone. You’ve got to help me find her.”

A pair of male nurses grabbed her by the arms and began physically restraining her, which only led to even more distress.

“Let me go. You don’t understand. Sophie’s lost. I’ve got to find her.”

The nurses had heard it all before and weren’t going to cater to a patient’s hallucinations. “Grab her arm,” one of them said.

At that point, Wyatt stepped in. “Turn her loose, damn it.”

The men were taken unawares by the strength of her alter’s reaction. Wyatt doubled up his fist as he pulled away, punched one nurse in the face, the other in the groin and took off running down the hall.

Aaron Tyler was just getting off the elevator and was on his way up to his office when he heard a woman screaming for Sophie. That had to be Ellie. He took off running in the direction of the screams.

Wyatt had gained some distance from his pursuers, and when he turned a corner that put him momentarily out of their sight, he darted into a janitor closet, then into the far corner and hid behind some mops and brooms.

Cinnamon arrived just as Wyatt was trying to catch his breath. “Well, that was smart. Now they’re going to shoot Ellie full of drugs to keep her quiet.”

Wyatt dropped his head. “Shit. I didn’t think.”

“You rarely do,” she reminded him. “Don’t worry. I’ll get us out of this, but next time, talk to me first before you decide to take someone out by the balls.”

Wyatt nodded. “Sorry, but what are we going to do about Sophie? She’s gone.”

“And we both know why,” Cin said, as she stood up. “The issue comes in convincing Ellie. I’m going out now. Keep your mouth shut and let me do the talking.”

“Right.”

They’d come a long way from Wyatt’s resentment of her arrival and Cinnamon was confident of her ability to keep everyone inside. She smoothed down the front of her shirt and pants, finger-combed her hair, and sauntered out of the janitor’s closet as calmly as if she was taking a walk. At that moment, Charlie came around the corner.

Cinnamon waved. “Hey Charlie. No worries. I have everything under control. Help me find Dr. Tyler, okay?”

“Is it really you?” Charlie said, as he grabbed her by the arm.

She grinned and winked. “All five feet seven inches of me and my gorgeous red hair.”

The two male nurses were right behind him, carrying restraints.

“It’s cool,” Charlie said. “Cinnamon’s here. It’s over.”

“Like hell,” one nurse muttered. “She hit me.”

The other one was still holding his crotch.

Charlie grinned. “You’re six foot two. Do you really want it to get around the hospital that a little female took you out?”

“Whatever, I’m putting her in restraints.”

Cinnamon waggled a finger. “Let’s don’t. I promise I’ve got them all under control. We need to find Dr. Tyler. All of this happened because Sophie is gone.”

Charlie immediately understood what that meant. “Aw heck, no wonder she freaked. Look guys, the restraints aren’t necessary. I’ve got this,” Charlie said, and took off down the hall holding Cinnamon’s arm.

Aaron was out of breath and down to a walk as he, too, finally caught up.

“Hey Doc, we’ve been looking for you,” Cin said. “Ellie has a problem. Do you have time to talk?”

Aaron was relieved to see Ellie had disappeared and the alter with the level head was now in charge.

“Of course. Bring her to my office, Charlie.”

Cinnamon went along quietly, saving her bombshell for when they were behind closed doors.

Ellie’s scream had been Luther’s wake-up call.
He sat up in bed, his heart hammering and the sound of her despair locked in his head. He got up and walked straight to the window. Sunrise had come and gone and the light of a new morning was softer than it would be later in the day. He pictured her face, and when he could feel her heartbeat, he closed his eyes.

Aaron didn’t want to ruin
the moment by setting up a video camera, so he turned on a tape recorder and settled in by throwing out his first question to Cinnamon. “What happened to Ellie this morning?”

“Sophie’s gone.”

Aaron blinked. “As in missing, or permanently gone?”

“As in not coming back ever,” she said. “Sophie warned Ellie it would happen, but typical Ellie, she chose to ignore something she didn’t want to face.”

“Why do you think Sophie left?”

Cin crossed her legs and leaned back in the chair. “I know why she left. Ellie doesn’t need her anymore now that Garrett’s dead. The less Sophie was needed, the worse her hearing became. After your God guy painted that window, Ellie has pretty much abandoned all of us except when she’s in her room. Then she wants to talk because she’s so afraid of being alone.”

“What do you think that window means to her?”

Cinnamon shrugged. “I don’t know and I don’t think Ellie does either. All she does when she sits down in front of it is talk to God, and I already told her she could talk to God anywhere. She didn’t need a Jesus window to make it happen.”

“So what’s going to happen once Ellie comes back?”

“She’s going to pitch a fit and then go into a state of depression for sure. You see, for Ellie, Sophie just died.”

“Lord.”

Cinnamon grinned. “Might be a good idea to clue Him in, too. Oh. Wait a sec
 . . .
uh, wow
 . . .
see you later, Doc.”

Ellie sat up. “Sophie is gone.”

Aaron blinked. What just happened? “Ellie?”

“Yes, it’s me.” Then she leaned forward and whispered. “Sophie is gone.” Tears rolled down her face. “She left and never even said good-bye. Why would she do that?”

Aaron was impressed. Ellie had never moved Cinnamon aside and taken the forefront before. It was either a sign of how distraught she was, or that she was finally learning to take control of her own anger. “Cinnamon said Sophie told you this would happen.”

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