The Boy Who Paints Me (4 page)

“There you go,” he said as he placed the paper bag down on the counter. “Let me know if you don’t like anything or need more, and I can run back to the store for you,” he said as a smile filled his face, revealing his straight, white teeth.

“Run?” I blurted out before thinking.

He chuckled to himself. “Well drive, it was just an expression,” he replied as a smirk filled his face.

I found myself fighting off a smile again as I stared up at him. “Oh.”

“Did you speak to Sarah yet?” he asked.

“Erm, yeah, I called her,” I replied.

“Good, is she
having fun out there?” he asked as a smile lit up his face. He really was very attractive. I tried not to notice but it was very difficult and for some reason I no longer felt threatened as I stood, alone with him.

"Huh?"

"In Spain?"

“Oh, erm, I forgot to ask,” I replied honestly, causing him to chuckle to himself.

“That might be one to add to the next conversation then,” he replied as he smirked at me.

“Yeah, probably,” I said as I tried to fight off his contagious smile.

“Great, well as I said if you need anything, at all, just give me a shout.”

“Is that another expression? Did you mean knock?” I asked, feeling a little more confident.

“No, really, I mean shout. My room’s opposite the guest room - sorry, your room, if you call loud enough, I can hear,” he said with a look of amusement on his face.

“Then, I’ll keep that in mind,” I replied as I smiled at him.

“Good. Right, I had better be off,” he said before making his way towards the kitchen door.

“Yeah,” I said almost feeling like I wanted him to stay. I didn’t know him but somehow he felt strangely safe, and I wasn’t looking forward to my first night alone in here. “And thank you,” I mumbled as I walked behind him.

“No problem, to tell you the truth, I was bored and had nothing to do so shopping gave me a task. You actually did me a favor,” I suddenly froze at the sound of that word.

Favor

I could feel the sweat gathering on my hands as I struggled to breathe. My body begin shaking, involuntarily. I squeezed my eyes shut in the hope that everything around me would disappear. One word was all that it took to remind me that this reality was not my own. Living here, making new friends, trying to trust again, it wasn’t the life that I was supposed to lead. I begged my brain to push the memory away but it would forever haunt me....

THREE YEARS AGO (FLASHBACK)

I was sat in the living room, reading through the new book that Mrs Collins had given us at the start of the semester. I had my iPod in my ears and was lost in my own peaceful world. My iPod was a present from my Aunt Sarah, one that I had needed much more than I ever knew when she first handed it to me. I used to see her every summer break but not anymore, not since Mitch. Mom said that he needed us; we didn’t have time to waste on pointless visits.

I was broken out of my thoughts by a light tap on my shoulder. I looked up to see a strained look in my mom’s brown eyes. I instantly pulled out my ear phones and looked up at her face. She didn’t look the same anymore, she looked aged, tired. The lines around her eyes made her look ten years older than she actually was. Her hair was always greasy and pulled back in a messy bun. She wore clothes that were way too big for her. Before I got the chance to ask her what was wrong, a confident voice filled the room.

“Nice place you got here, Mitch.” I didn’t recognise the three men that had just walked into my living room. Seeing the fear in my mom’s eyes, I knew that these men were not Mitch’s friends. Mitch wasn’t generally a nervous man - in fact he was the complete opposite - so when I witnessed the fear spread across his face, I knew that something was seriously wrong.

“Look, Billy, I told you that I would get your money-”

“Yeah, that was three weeks ago. I’m a very impatient man, Mitch. I think I’ve been reasonable, haven’t I?” The man, who Mitch referred to as Billy, asked. He was a small, stocky guy, dressed in an expensive looking suit. He was clad in thick gold jewelery that sparkled every time that he shifted his balance. The two men behind him stood by his side, faithfully. They looked like a pair of guard dogs that would attack on his command. I watched as Mitch swallowed the lump in his throat before glancing at my mom.

“Listen, honey, why don’t you go to your room,” my mom urged, pleading with her eyes. I didn’t want to leave her alone but I knew that things were about to get ugly, and I wasn’t sure that I could face watching that.

“Nobody is going anywhere. You see, I’m tired of waiting and chasing you for what’s rightfully mine. I’m a businessman, Mitch, a damn good one. Do you know what makes me such a good business man?” Billy asked as his eyes homed in on Mitch’s. Mitch shook his head, carefully keeping his eyes locked on the ground. I didn’t know this guy but I knew that it would have been pointless for Mitch to try and answer his question. “Delegation; I delegate. That’s what makes me so good. I tell people where to go and what to do, and that’s how I like it. So, you can imagine my frustration when I’m told that I have to personally pay you a visit. See, I’m a family man, I like to spend time with the wife and kids – not often – but every once in a while, and that once in a while, was tonight but look at where I am.”

“Sorry,” Mitch whispered after clearing his throat.

The entire room was tense and deadly silent. I could feel my heart beating in my chest as I anticipated Billy’s next move. I knew that Mitch wasn’t getting out of this completely intact. He had been with my mom for seven months now, and I was used to the fact that he lead a secret life, separate from the one with us but this was the first time that the two had collided. I guess that it was only a matter of time.

“Do you hear that, boys? He’s sorry,” he said as he held his hands out, before turning towards them and laughing. “Sorry doesn’t get the time back though, does it?” He asked before allowing his fist to make contact with Mitch’s nose. It was so fast that I almost believed that I had imagined it. He hit him as easily as you might flick over the channel on TV, or pour milk into your bowl of cereal. He was a man who clearly had no feelings, no sympathy and no exceptions. I felt the nausea start to take over as the sound of Mitch’s nose breaking kept replaying in my mind. I knew that it was broken because I heard it. There was blood everywhere, and he was screaming in pain.

The tears were rolling down mine, and my mom’s cheeks. I wasn’t crying for Mitch - like my mom - he and I never really got on that well, since he was the main reason for the down fall in our relationship. My mom and I were very close but when he came along that changed, everything changed. I was crying out of fear that we may never get the chance to mend that relationship after tonight.

We knew there was nothing that we could do, and it was a terrifying thought. The idea that someone could just walk into your home, and do what they wanted was an unsettling feeling. I tried to zone out as Billy ordered his ‘guard dogs’ to finish off what he had started. I tried to ignore what was happening but the sound of their feet colliding with Mitch’s ribs was too much to bear. I may not have been his biggest fan but nobody deserved that. It was my mom’s screaming that snapped me out of my trance.

“No, please, just stop, you’re killing him. Please, I’ll do anything...anything,” my mom screamed, frantically, finally catching Billy’s attention.

“Boys,” he shouted, causing them to come to a halt.

“Anything?” He asked as he took a couple of steps towards her. She looked down at Mitch’s beaten body on the floor before turning towards Billy and nodding her head.

“Wow, I don’t know how you did it, Mitchy boy but this one has fallen hard. Anything! Did you hear that boys, she’ll do anything just so that we don’t kill that piece of scum on the floor,” he said as he stood in front of my mom. He lifted his hand before allowing it to rest gently on her cheek, causing her to flinch at the sight of his movement. “Now, now, don’t panic, hitting women isn’t something, I tend to make a habit of, so calm down,” he said as he chuckled to himself. He kept his gaze locked on her face as he gently caressed her cheek. I could taste the salt of the tears that were still running down my face. All I wanted to do was grab my mom and get out of there. She needed saving, and I was helpless, completely helpless. “It’s clear to see that you were a beautiful woman in your youth. I bet you had all the men drooling over you, right?” He asked as he let his other hand trail down the side of her body, causing her to squeeze her eyes shut. She shook her head, gently as he continued to stare at her. “Unfortunately, you’re an older model now. I’m a man, and I like women that can keep up, offer me something new. I prefer younger models,” he said as his head snapped in my direction. I felt my whole body freeze and my eyes widen as he caught my gaze. I knew what he was asking, I knew what he meant, and it made me feel sick. I felt all of the blood drain from my cheeks as my eyes darted between my mom and him.

“No, she’s just fifteen,” she replied as her eyes snapped open.

“Ssh, ssh, ssh, I thought you said ‘anything’,” he said as he let his finger trail across her lips.

“No,” she said as the tears streamed, heavily down her face.

“Ok,” he said before removing his hands from her and turning around to face Mitch, “Boys,” he continued before they began kicking Mitch even harder than before.

“No, please, don’t, you’re going to kill him,” my mom screamed as she tried to grab a hold of Billy’s suit jacket. In an instance he sent her flying across the room. I shut my eyes as her head made contact with the coffee table. I didn’t open them until I heard the cry that escaped her mouth, telling me that she was still alive.

I opened my eyes just in time to witness the exchange between my mom and Mitch. His eyes were pleading with her. With the last bit of energy that he had, he used his eyes to beg her for the unthinkable. Her eyes darted back to mine as a pained expression passed her face. I knew what the look meant but some small part of me prayed that I was wrong. I prayed that my mom was the kind of mom who put her child first. I prayed that she was the kind of mother that would die before she allowed her daughter to come to any harm.

“Ok,” she whispered after several minutes of looking between me and Mitch. “Ok, please just stop hurting him,” she said as she ducked her head in shame.

I actually felt like my heart had stopped beating in my chest as the words entered my ears. I silently begged her to take back her words with my eyes but she refused to look at me.

“Stop,” Billy said, causing the ‘guard dogs’ to back away from Mitch’s broken body. I watched as my mom scrambled across the floor, throwing herself into Mitch’s chest, willing him to be ok. I watched as she cried silent tears and prayed to the God that she claimed didn’t exist, no matter how many times I told her that she was wrong. She cried tears that should have been for me, gave away love that should have been given to me and offered away a choice that should have been mine.

I don’t remember hearing the rest of the conversation in the living room because everything went silent in my mind. I don’t remember when I was taken into my bedroom or who closed the door. I had even less knowledge as to how I ended up on my bed. I had blanked out the reasons as to why my torn clothes were thrown across the room. I had no recollection of how I got the bruises on my thighs or why they ached so badly. My mind couldn’t tell me why my wrists had been imprinted with fingerprints, and the knowledge of the blood stained sheets was gone; it was nothing but a distant blip in the mass of all my memories. I was a blank canvas now, robbed of everything that had ever mattered. The innocence that should have been mine was stolen, taken in a single moment. Rainie was dead and instead, this empty shell was lying in her place. I felt like I had stepped out of my body, watching her like she was a separate entity....

I watched as her head drifted to the side, looking away from the man who had taken something that she could never get back. She let a single tear roll down her cheek, a tear that spoke so many words in the silence. She lay still and tried to understand the woman that she thought would always love her unconditionally, and protect her. Instead, she came to the conclusion that nothing made sense anymore, and everything that did, was a lie. In that moment when she lay there, staring at the empty space on her wall she decided that that was how it would always be, gone were the days where she would ever fell anything again. She was somebody else, a different person. She was Rain, and I was Rainie. She was created to absorb the pain, to take away the shame, to become the mask....