The Broken Girl (Lonely Girl Book 2) (3 page)

I sense Sarah lean towards me and I go the rest of the way to kiss her. I can’t deny that it’s still there. It’s different from before but I still care about Sarah. I move my hand around her back and pull her tighter towards me as our kiss deepens. I feel her open her mouth slightly, allowing me access, and I take it. God, I miss this, but yet I feel odd.
Who cares? Clearly Bec’s with Jake, right?
I put my hand under her shirt and she moans as my hand connects with her skin. It’s an instant turn on and I’m getting more into this as it goes. I hear a squeak of the door followed by a gasp. We separate and I see Bec looking at me with her eyes wide and full of tears. It’s like a ton of bricks have dropped on my heart. God, she wasn’t kidding, I am an asshole.

Before I can say anything, she turns and runs out of the room with Alec just standing there, and not following her.

Sarah has a smug look. “Well, I guess she knows how we really feel about each other now, doesn’t she? I’m going to go, but don’t worry, I’ll be back, Key. Love you.” Sarah said with pleasure.

I turn to Alec and wish I could place the unfounded panic that has my heart racing at the fact that Bec just ran from the room. His eyes are on me and I feel like I deserve whatever he’s about to do.
  “What did I just do?” I look to Alec, hoping to see my friend, but all I see is hurt in his eyes. Of course… it’s his sister. Shit!

“Well if you were trying to hurt her, then I guess you did what you wanted to. Are you sure you don’t remember the last year or so?” I’m speechless to what he’s just said. Why would he think I’m lying about not remembering and why would this have anything to do with that.

“What do you mean, ‘remember?’ Of course not! Why in the hell would you say that shit?” He shakes his head and turns around so that I can’t see his face. “You know what, Alec? Don’t be pissed at me because, from what I hear, I’m not the only one stepping out of this relationship. You should ask your little sister Bec where she sleeps at night.” Alec whips around and stalks up to me. I will admit that I pull back, wishing I’d played it cool. He’s seriously pissed.

“Don’t you dare!
  Don’t ever put that shit on her, man! Jake is her best friend. Yes, she loves him but she loves you too. She was with you, Key. She never cheated on you. You’re just letting that bitch Sarah screw with you like she always has when it comes to my sister. I won’t let you, not this time, I’ll push her to Jake and you will lose the best thing that every happened to you in your pathetic little life.”

He takes a deep breath, letting out the anger. “But
to answer your questions: you were together and, yes, when you weren’t around she’d sleep with Jake. However, it wasn’t sexual and you knew that. It was because of her nightmares from Dillon and the fear she had over it. He tried to kill her on a few occasions. Not to mention watching Michael, her boyfriend, die. So, pardon me that my sister’s a little screwed up from all the shit that’s happened to her. But what the hell is your excuse then?”

I’m furious she’s been in Jake’s bed and we were together.

“Well, Jake and her better not be doing that anymore.” I see the anger return to his eyes but my anger won’t allow me to calm down.

“Guess the Keegan we all know is still in there somewhere because of what just happened with Sarah. Well, that’s exactly what he did when he was insecure about her loving him too.”

“Time to pick, once and for all, Key. Is it Becca or is it Sarah? I sure as hell don’t see what choice it really is, but with everything that’s happened, I sympathize with you. I wouldn’t know what to do but, man, you can’t keep them both.” I nod because I know he’s right. I just wish I could remember everything so I could make the right choice. I guess that would just be too easy.

“She needs to make one too. She can’t have both of us. I won’t rush her because Jake’s sick, but she has to make a choice.”

He looks at me somberly and nods. “Don’t I know it. Now get your head outta your ass and stop screwing around with this Sarah shit. If you want Becca, or even want the possibility of having Becca, then Sarah has to go. Sarah’s had it out for Becca from day one. If you choose to see Sarah, that is your choice. I will understand.  However, I can’t have you living with me. Becca needs to feel safe and I’m going to talk her into moving back in with me.”

“I think I’m in love with Sarah though. I just can’t explain it.”

Alec just shakes his head and looks at the floor. “Then I guess I will start packing you stuff. I’ll talk to the dorms and see if we can get you in there for the rest of the semester.”

I shake my head. “No, no dorms. I just want a small apartment of my own.”

He nods and says he will bring me some ads. “I hope you don’t ever remember, man. If you did, you’d hate the choice you just made.” With that, he turns on his heels and walks out the room.

“I think I love Bec too, though.” I know he didn’t hear me but I said it anyways. I just wish I could remember her. What if I’m making the mistake he thinks I am? Or what if I choose her and I’m not remembering that even with Bec, I still loved Sarah. Either way, I’m screwed. Isn’t that just great shit!

Becca

Keegan and Sarah. I can’t continue to compete with her. She wants Keegan and clearly he wants her. I won’t stand in the way anymore. I will be his friend but I won’t fight to keep what doesn’t seem to be mine. First, he did stunts like this even before we got together. Then, during my first time, he says
her
name.
Come on, Becca! How much more do you need to realize it’s over between you two.
I ran, I’d admit to it. I couldn’t watch that, not again. I’m tired of fighting Sarah. But I will still be one of Keegan’s best friends if he will have me, no matter the heartache it costs. Right now he needs friends that are going to be there for him and I won’t turn my back on him. Not after everything he’s done and given up for me.
Time to put on your big girl panties and be a friend. It’s not like you even had made a choice as to who you love more. You are going to lose one of them.

My inner thoughts have never been more right because as I push through the door to Jake’s room, my body turns cold at the sight in front of me. Doctor and nurses are rushing around the bed and Jake is hooked up to more wires and a breathing mask. I can’t hear anything. The world is right there but yet so far away. I see them trying to stabilize him, but it’s not working.
Don’t leave me, Jakey.
I watched on, wishing my inner plea could reach him. I start to hear again and the world comes crashing in. I hear the beeping of his monitors slow and now the alarms are sounding. I hear someone say, “Call the OR.” I feel like I’m going to pass out, I can’t lose Jake. He can’t die from trying to save me. I’m not worth that type of sacrifice. I see them push the button and the speakers are blaring, indicating a code blue in Jake’s room. The next words make me sink against the wall, right to the floor. I sit there staring blankly, in a pile of scattered emotions.

“We’re losing him!”

I’m still in a puddle on the floor when the door opens. Staring around the room, all around is disarray. Medical supplies are laying everywhere and the bed where Jake was is no longer there. “Becca, are you okay?” I look up to see Drake pulling me off the floor. I’m too shocked by what has happened to even understand the meaning of him being here.

I hear the door swing open again and shriek. “Becca!” Drake is holding me while Keegan yells at me, with my brother and Charlotte looking at me, stunned to our current surroundings.

“Where’s Jake, Becca?”

I look to Alec, with no emotions left to convey. “He’s been rushed to the operating room.”

I don’t move out of Drake’s hold and Keegan’s eyes are burning me. “What does that have to do with Drake being all over you?”

I hear Drake groan. He turns but doesn’t let go of me. “I’m here because Charlotte asked me to come. We’ve become friends and I wanted to stop and see Jake before I went to find her. When I came in, I found Becca laying on the floor in shock and picked her up to comfort her.” I pull tighter to Drake trying to hide from Keegan, since I haven’t seen him since the Sarah incident.

“Let go of Bec. She’s not yours Drake.” Keegan is seething but all I feel is the pain of being called Bec.

“She’s not yours either, Keegan. From what the bitch new girlfriend of yours has being tell everyone, you and Becca are done.” I
peek out from Drake to see that Keegan doesn’t deny it.
Why should he, Becca? He doesn’t remember you.

Keegan responds slowly, “I didn’t. I don’t know. I guess she’s right.” I turn my face away from his eyes because I just can’t
bear to look at him anymore.

“Key, don’t act like you ‘guess.’ I asked you and you flat out said shit to cement that fact... Like I don’t know you’re moving out of our house?” Alec is furious; he has so much hate in his tone.

This is news to me and I tense. Drake pulls me closer and I’m in his full embrace as he strokes my back and hair. “How am I the bad one here? From what I’m told, she was like this, if not worse, with Jake. Why would I stick around for round two? Who knows, maybe this time it will be both Drake and Jake she’s sleeping with at night.”

I can’t help the
anger that comes over me and I blow up. I start screaming. “Get him out of here!”

I hear shuffling and then the door is shut. I look up to see just Charlotte left in the room. Drake is comforting me and I’m actually surprised that it doesn’t feel off. I don’t get the same vibe I did from him anymore. “Becca, let’s go see if they have an update on Jake, okay?”

I look to Drake and see nothing but supportive eyes looking back at me. “Thank you, Drake.” He turns and puts his arm around me, leading me to the nursing station, with Charlotte in tow.

“Alec will be back. He just took that good-for-nothing jackass back to his room.”
God, I love Charlotte.
When a nurse comes to talk to us, we just listen. None of us are breathing, it feels like. She told us that it’s still to soon too tell, but that Jake had complications from his last surgery. He is in critical condition due to internal bleeding. She gives my hand a squeeze before leaving us in the waiting room closest to the operating room.

“Anything?” I see Alec and he has no emotions showing on his face. I know this face well. It means he’s barely holding it together. I remember this same expression from when they told me Michael hadn’t made it. “He’s in critical condition, Potts. It’s all we know.” Drake looks at me and pulls me next to him. I lean into him. The next six hours are the longest of my life. At some point, I fall asleep with my head on Drake. When I awaken to hear the doctors coming through the door in search of us, I forget where I am momentarily. I find myself laying in Drakes lap with a blanket on me. “Are you the family of Jacob Kelso?”

We all nod and the doctors explain that it was touch and go for most of it. At one point they did lose him, but where able to stabilize him and he seems to be doing well in recovery. They tell us that when he’s moved to his room, it is fine for one of us to stay with him. “Who’s Rebecca Potts?” I perk up and raise my hand. “His grandmother, who we called to notify, said that you’re in charge of his care.” Drake, Charlotte, and my brother just stare at me. I nod because this isn’t exactly news to me.

“Will he be awake?” I finally find my voice but it’s still shaky.

“He’s medicated now but we expect him to wake up in a few hours. We believe he will now make a full recovery.” I breathe for the first time it feels like since I saw them take Jake away. “As soon as he comes through recovery, a nurse will be through to come get you.” I nod and the doctors walk away.

“Becca, when did you become his next of kin?” Alec asks.

I look to Alec and I just shrug. “I didn’t know until I got here and wanted to see him on the ICU floor. I guess when I was here and he wasn’t allowed to see me, since it wasn’t listed. After Dillon attacked me, he didn’t want me to ever feel that helpless and not be able to be informed. That’s what he told his grandmother and she wasn’t fighting me on it. She said it’s what he wanted.”

Charlotte tries changing the subject. “Alec, I think we should leave and go get Becca something to change into and something to eat other than this hospital crap.” Charlotte is trying to give me some space but I don’t think I want to be alone. Drake’s arm is draped over my shoulder and I don’t feel alone with them all here.

“Charlotte, I don’t want to leave Becca alone that long,” Alec says.

I feel Drake tighten around me as he interrupts my brother. “I’ll stay. Just bring me back something. Okay, Charlotte?” My brother looks at him with hesitation, but I nod to him, giving him the okay. They pick up their jackets and hug me goodbye, leaving me sitting in the waiting room with Drake. What’s even stranger is that I’ve never felt safe around him until now.
What has happened to my life?

Sitting and waiting to be allowed in to see Jake, being alone with Drake has become awkward. His arm is still around me, comforting me with his presence. It’s completely friendly, which is so strange. However, he keeps opening his mouth to say something, and then he changes his mind. I see the inner thoughts stirring and I feel for him. He looks like he’s trying to tell me the hardest thing in the world.