The Bull Rider's Manager (11 page)

James pulled her into a hug. “She needs to live somewhere safe. Where she can’t hurt herself or others. You aren’t losing her by making sure she’s safe.”

“Keep telling me that and maybe after a few hundred years, I’ll believe you.” Barb leaned her head on James’s chest. The man was a rock. Lizzie was one lucky woman. But feeling his arms around her, all she could think about was that James wasn’t the one she wanted to hold her. She needed Hunter. And the depth of that need, that want, scared her almost as much as putting her mother into an assisted living facility.

James patted her back then pushed her away. He wiped her tears with his handkerchief. “You ready to get this over with?”

“Always the sensitive one.” Barb laughed. “I need Lizzie, I get her too-busy husband.”

“Liz wanted to come. I just didn’t want her to spend four hours in the car today. She’s wearing down a bit carrying those boys.”

Barb felt a tang of guilt. She knew Lizzie would have been here for her if she could have. “I’m a selfish bitch sometimes.”

“Nah, just Barb.” James put his arm around her shoulder and they walked to his new SUV. JR’s booster seat was thrown in the back. Barb’s mom and Cassie were in the back seat. Lorraine’s face brightened when Barb climbed in the passenger seat.

“Hi, Mom.” Barb reached back and patted her mother’s hand. A hand still young.

“Shawnee was beautiful this week. You should have stayed with me.” Lorraine squeezed Barb’s hand. “Maybe the next trip you can stay longer.”

“Maybe.” Barb turned her head toward the window; catching her reflection, she wiped away a stray tear.

The ride to the facility was quiet except for the sound of Cassie reading a story quietly to Lorraine. Reading seemed to soothe her and today, Lorraine needed to be soothed.

When they walked into the facility and to Lorraine’s new room, Barb was surprised to see how much they’d been able to replicate the room to look like the one her mom had at home.

Lorraine crossed over to the bed. “I’m so glad to be home. You and James run back to your lives. I’m sure there’s a rodeo somewhere you have to be getting to.”

“You sure you’ll be okay?” Barb handed her a call button that sat on the nightstand. “If you need anything, just press this and someone will come in and help you.”

“I’m not stupid. I know how to push a call button.” Lorraine’s voice was low and slow. “I know you need to do this, honey. I’ll be fine here.”

Lorraine’s words shocked Barb. Her mother hadn’t been coherent most of the week, but right now, she was as clear headed as she’d ever been. “Mom?”

Lorraine smiled. “You go on home and come visit me tomorrow if you’re still in town. I’d like to have you visit.”

Barb leaned down and kissed her mother’s feather soft cheek. “I love you.”

“I know, baby. I know.” Lorraine lay on the bed, turning her body away from Barb, James, and Cassie.

Cassie walked them to the door. “I’ll stay and read to her until she falls asleep.”

James took Barb’s arm and walked her through the hallway. She stopped at the office.

“I need to check in with the administrator.” She nodded to the door. “Go call Lizzie and I’ll meet you at the car.”

James’s mouth turned into a small grin. “You sure? Liz can wait a few minutes to grill me about how you’re doing.”

“Positive. You might want to check on that brother of yours to see if he’s decided to go to the Montana Roundup this weekend or not. I’ve heard from everyone but him. The boys decided they could handle one rodeo without me.” Barb stepped toward the office door.

“You’re irreplaceable, don’t fret. Montana isn’t big money rodeo anyway. I’m sure Jesse just forgot to check in.” James pushed open the entry door. “Take your time.”

Barb looked around the plush waiting room. Country casual. A room designed to make you feel at home in a place you didn’t want to be. A vision of Hunter sprawled out on the couch, his feet hanging off the edge, made her giggle.

The sound of her laugh brought a slim woman in a business suit out of the administrator’s office and she stood in front of Barb with the marketing smile Barb used on prospective sponsors. “Can I help you?”

“I’m Barb Carico. I just moved my mom into her room today?” Barb didn’t know what else to say.

The woman’s smile deepened and Barb thought she saw dollar signs flash in the woman’s eyes. “Yes, we’ve been expecting Lorraine to come join our family. Mr. Jones has your paperwork all ready. Go on in.”

A tall thin man sat behind a large oak desk. Bookcases filled the wall behind him. He stood and motioned to one of the burgundy wing back chairs in front of him. “Have a seat, Miss Carico. I was just finalizing the paperwork.”

Barb sat on the edge of the chair. “So what do we do now? Do I make you monthly payments?”

Mr. Jones looked confused. “I thought you knew. A Hunter Martin set up the financial arrangements yesterday. I assumed he was your brother or a relative?”

Barb sighed. “Mr. Martin, Hunter, is my husband. We’re newlyweds.” She lifted her left hand to show him the placer ring. Thank God it hadn’t turned her finger green. Fake diamond or not, the ring looked expensive. “I guess he didn’t want to concern me with the details. Are you going to send me a monthly statement then?”

“Miss Carico, I mean, Mrs. Martin, an account has been set up for the payments to be directly paid at the first of each month. I’m sure your husband was meaning to inform you.” He pushed the admission paperwork toward her. “Now, if you’ll just sign these admission papers, you can be back on your way.”

Just sign your mom’s care over to us and no muss, no worries. Barb knew she was doing the right thing. Her mother had even told her she wanted this. But signing each paper while the facility’s administrator watched just seemed so wrong.

Tonight was a Ben and Jerry’s night. Then, if she still felt like a heel, she’d break open one of those bottles of wine Hunter kept in his pantry. After Kati went to bed. She’d play the mommy role, hiding her pain until Kati fell asleep. She thought of the little girl’s blonde wispy hair and smiled. Had her mother felt this way so quickly about her? Barb had known Kati less than a week and already she cared for the kid.

“Anything else?” Barb pushed the paperwork toward Mr. Jones, who tapped it on the desk to make it uniform, then gently placed the paper into a file folder. Barb could see her mom’s name on the label.

“We’re done here.” Mr. Jones stood and held out his hand. “Visit anytime. Sundays we have a great fried chicken dinner for our guests. Most of our residents are on a strict diet though so we have special menus for them.”

“I’ll be around.” Barb shook the man’s hand. She could see in his eyes that he doubted her word. He must hear that a lot from family members. But this time, except for when her job pulled her away, Barb would visit.

Even if it broke her heart a little with every return.

She climbed into the passenger seat of James’s SUV.

“Bad?” He turned down the volume on the radio station he’d been listening to.

“Worse.” She wouldn’t cry. Not now. Maybe after the bottle of wine in her room after she knew everyone was asleep.

James pulled her into a quick hug. “I’ve got good news for you then. Lizzie and I will be down on Sunday.”

“Sunday?” Barb slipped her seatbelt on, clicking the tab. “What’s Sunday?”

“You don’t know? Your wedding reception is on Sunday. Lizzie just got a call from someone at Martin Dairy with the invite. So you want a blender or a crock pot?” James cranked the engine.

“Neither.” A wedding reception? What was Hunter playing with here? He must have thought it would help them look more married to the court. “Just come. I don’t want a gift.”

“When you don’t tell people what you want, you get a hundred fondue gift sets. This is the voice of experience talking here. And some of those suckers aren’t returnable.”

Barb stared out the side window. “I gave you guys a fondue pot.”

“Maybe we can return the favor.” James turned back on the radio and the car was silent until he dropped her off in front of her mom’s empty house.

Not looking at the house, not wanting to see it look as empty as it felt, Barb climbed into her rental. Hunter needed to get her a real car. Maybe he had one she could borrow for the short time they would be married.

Then again, maybe she should just keep the rental. She’d be out of town next weekend for sure. And maybe by then the court situation would be over with, and Barb could be a divorced woman again.

Just like before.

“Where are we going?” Kati squirmed in the back seat of the rental. Apparently, due to air bags, kids weren’t allowed to ride up front until they left for college or something. There was so much about raising a child Barb didn’t know. One more reason that it was good this arrangement was temporary.

Barb had picked Kati up from school as what her mom used to call Friday surprise. She and Lizzie would slip into the back of their Buick and the three of them would take off. Sometimes it was ice cream at The Pancake House in town. Sometimes they would do a run down to the closest drive-thru for a greasy fast food dinner of hamburgers, fries, and shakes. Once they’d even gone to a food bank and packed boxes.

But they’d never gone to a nursing home. Assisted living, Barb corrected herself. She glanced at Kati in the rearview mirror.

“It’s Friday surprise.” Barb turned out of the school parking lot and headed to the freeway. The assisted living center was located out in Eagle. Great neighborhood for the affluently upscale two parent Boise commuter households. Barb had thought someday she’d love to live in the tiny community, but her income had never been enough to afford the country life. Besides, she loved living in San Francisco. No one knew her there. She could go for days without talking to anyone.

Barb realized Kati had asked another question. “Sorry, wool gathering. What did you say?”

“I asked if I could bring cupcakes next Wednesday for the class. Uncle Hunter missed my birthday last month and I didn’t get to have a party at school. My teacher said now that you guys are married, you might do cupcakes for me.”

“Chocolate or vanilla. Or swirled?”

“Chocolate. Besides, you can’t do swirled, can you?” Kati frowned.

“I can do swirled. Don’t tell me you’ve never swirled a cake batter?”

“No.” Kati sounded hesitant.

“Well, Tuesday night we’ll bake and I’ll show you how you can have it all. At least where cupcakes are concerned.” Barb pulled into Countryside’s parking lot. “We’re here.”

Kati looked around the building. “It looks like a big house.”

The building did look more like a large ranch house than an institution. Flowerbeds graced the front with walking paths running around the property and a large privacy fence surrounding the backyard. Benches were scattered around the front, making Barb homesick for the large front porch their Shawnee house had sported. Barb had spent many a summer day prone in that swing, reading.

“My mom lives here. She just moved in yesterday, so I’m not sure how settled or calm she is today. Bear with me for a little visit and then we’ll hit the bookstore on the way home. Deal?” Barb leaned over the fake leather seat watching Kati.

The smile that filled the kid’s face was answer enough. “I haven’t been at a bookstore since … ” She faltered, the smile leaving her face. Barb wondered if she’d made a mistake. But then Kati seemed to make a decision and the smile returned to her face, albeit a bit sadder. “My mom and I used to go once a month on Saturdays. It was our time.”

“We don’t have to go.” Barb was close to tears. Kati had suffered so much so young.

“I want to.” Kati unhooked her seatbelt and put her hand on the door. “Are we ready?” The kid was an old soul. She reminded Barb of Lizzie at that age. Centered, understanding, and kind. Hunter was a lucky guy to be able to raise Kati, no matter what the situation. She’d have to tell him about the bookstore so he could start taking Kati after she left.

After she left. Why did those words suddenly cause her a pang of regret?

“Barb?” Kati’s voice broke through her thoughts.

“Sorry, kiddo. I’m ready.” Barb stepped out of the car and crossed over to meet Kati on the other side, surprised when Kati slipped her hand into hers. Comforted by the gesture, they walked into the front door.

Winding through the halls, they came to Lorraine’s room. Soft music flowed out of the doorway when they opened the door. Lorraine sat on the loveseat in the living area of her suite, looking at photo albums.

“Are you up for a short visit?” Barb stood at the doorway, not wanting to intrude on the world her mother was building.

A smile brightened Lorraine’s face. “Anytime. Although I expected you to be out of town with your cowboys this weekend. Come in.”

Barb sat next to her mother on the loveseat and motioned for Kati to sit in the wing chair on the other side of the small couch. “Mom, this is Kati. She’s my … ” Barb stopped. She’d almost said daughter. Even in the short time she’d known Kati, her heart had attached to this sad little girl. Barb finished her sentence with “niece.”

Lorraine frowned at the word then smiled at Kati. “It’s nice to meet you. I didn’t realize my daughter had a new niece.”

“That’s because she married my uncle who had to take me in when my parents died.” Kati’s glance dropped to the photo album.

“You got married?” Lorraine looked confused, glancing around the room. “How long have I been here?”

Barb patted her mother’s hand. “You moved in yesterday. Sorry, this wedding thing kind of happened fast. I would have told you sooner, but … ” Barb hesitated.

“But I wasn’t here again. I’d had an attack,” Lorraine finished for her.

“Yeah.”

A silence filled the room, both women mourning the time missed — past and future. Kati broke the silence, pointing to the photo album. “Did you used to ride?”

“Why yes, I did. But those photos are of Barb when she was Queen of the Snake River Stampede. It was such an honor. Barb’s riding club was so small, no one from their group had ever even placed in the bigger rodeo competitions. Not even her friend Lizzie.” Lorraine smiled at her daughter. “You were so beautiful that night with your tiara on your purple cowboy hat. Do you still have that hat?”