The Capture of Highland Desire (The Mac Coinnach Brothers) (16 page)

             
“They meant nothing to me”, he told her earnestly.  “Nothing.”

             
She shook her head.  “That’s just the problem, Eian.  I want to be more than nothing.”

             
His hands fisted at his sides.  Hell, he couldn’t do this!  All of the sweet words of promise and seduction that had fallen so easily from his lips for so long were worthless now.  Hollow.  False.  Right now, he was so far out of his usual depth that he just might drown.  For once, he had no idea what to say to get what he wanted… what he
needed
.  And damn but he had never
needed
this badly before.

             
With a sigh, he held up his hands in defeat, afraid that he might end up saying something he would regret.  He could figure this out, he just needed a little more time to think.  “Then let’s at least put some more ground behind us tonight.  I’ll take ye back to Lochain.  Back to yer uncle.  We can get to ken one another better, and then ye can decide.”

             
She nodded slowly.  “All right.  Thank you.  And Eian…”

             
“Aye lass?”

             
She stood on her tiptoes and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek.  “Thank you for the rescue.  You saved my life back there.  I won’t forget it.”

             
He gave her a long look.  “Allia love, I could do no less.” 

             
After helping her onto Dair’s strong back, Eian swung up behind her and took up the reins. He felt the slight tremble of her fragile body and pulled her gently to rest against him, suddenly feeling like an ass.  The lass had just been kidnapped and very nearly raped, and the first thing he had done was press her for much more than the kiss she had willingly given.  What the hell had he been thinking?  He hadn’t, at least not with his brain.  Not only that, but she was far too precious to be taken on the forest floor by a man overcome with lust and still covered in the blood of the men he had slain to get to her.  He gently stroked her hair with one hand, and she relaxed against his chest with a sigh.  Eian knew he should wait until he could lay her down on a soft bed and worship her with his body the way she deserved.  He didn’t think she was still a maid, because Bren’s wife was also raised in the 21
st
century, and she had told them many stories, including how women of that time enjoy many of the same freedoms as men.  When he thought of Allia with another man, he felt like killing someone, so he tried not to think about it.  Especially since the man was surely far out of his reach, so there was nothing he could do about it.  Virgin or no, he would erase all other men from her mind, until she wanted only him, needed only him.  He would give her anything…

             
He knew the moment she fell asleep in his arms, her breath deepening and her body relaxing against his.  It felt…peaceful, and so he rode for a little while longer just like that, breathing in the sweet scent of her hair, basking in her trust.  The sun was getting low in the sky and it would soon be too dark for Dair to safely pick his way through the thick forest, so when they came to a sheltered, grassy glade, Eian decided to stop for the night.  When the horse came to a halt, Allia woke with a little gasp and sat up straight, looking around with wild eyes.  Then she seemed to remember where she was, and who she was with.  She looked up at him.

             
“Where are we?”

             
“We’ll rest here for the night.  It’ll be safe enough with a few wards to warn us of anyone’s approach, but I willna risk a fire.”  He swung down and then lifted her effortlessly from the saddle, leading her to sit on a nearby log while he tended the horse for the night.  He gave Dair some oats from his saddle bag, and whispered soothing words of praise to him as he brushed the animal down.  Then he went into the woods a little ways to set the wards.  He returned to Allia a short time later carrying a woolen blanket from the saddle bag, which he spread out over a patch of soft grass.  “Come and lie down, lass.  Ye must be tired.”

             
“I am”, Allia admitted.  She rose from her seat, her muscles protesting with stiffness from the tension she had been holding in them the last couple of days.  She made her way to the blanket and lay down, stretching out her aching limbs with a sigh.  A moment later, Eian lay down beside her, and her body began to tense up again, even though he wasn’t touching her in any way.  Having him lying beside her made her belly clench with excitement, and a little tremor of anticipation skittered down her spine.  Although she still didn’t
completely
trust him, the fact that he had risked his own life to find her was a big point in his favor.  And he was the only reason she had come back… because she just hadn’t been able to imagine not seeing him again.  Now she was here.  They were together, and this was no time to chicken out, as she had when things got out of control with that kiss. 

In truth, it had felt so good that she had been afraid she would sell her soul if he would just never stop kissing her. 
But they needed to talk to one another, openly and honestly, if this was ever going to go anywhere.  She couldn’t help it.  She had been raised in the 21
st
century, after all.

             
She turned to look at the man beside her.  In the pale light between dusk and dark, she could just make out his face.  He was on his side, leaning on one elbow, and watching her with those fathomless brown eyes and their dark, almost pretty lashes.  She took a deep breath before she spoke; best just to get it over with.

             
“Eian, I… I want to tell you something.  About where I come from.”

             
He smiled.  “Ah.  Ye mean how ye have that strange sexy accent, not quite English… not quite Scottish either?  I had wondered about that…”  He took her hand in his and looked at her expectantly.  “Tell me.”

             
“You might not believe me”, she warned, finding it hard to concentrate when he was touching her.

             
Eian’s smile faded a little, and a look that seemed older than his years passed over his face.  “Ye have no idea, lass.  The things that I believe… because I’ve seen them.  And other things… because I haven’t.  Now tell me.”

             
Allia regarded him steadily for a moment.  There was so much more to this man than she had first thought.  When she had first met him such a short time ago, he had been nothing but a drop-dead gorgeous playboy that she liked to look at.  Now she knew that he could go from lighthearted to passionate to deadly serious… to just plain deadly, in the blink of an eye.  Telling him about her past was harder than she thought it would be, in part, she had to admit, because she was afraid of losing him somehow.  Maybe he would think she was crazy…. but she had to be honest with him.

             
“I was born here… I mean, at Lochain.  My mother was Leon’s younger sister.  Her name was Arabella, and she was very beautiful, and… and kind.”  She hesitated.  Eian could very well know more about what had happened than she did, after all, he had always lived here,
now
.  And she knew there had to be more to the story than she had been told, if what she had been told was even the truth, which she was beginning to doubt.

“When I was still very young
, my father died in battle, and my mother died a short time later.  I was sent away because his enemies had sworn to kill me too.  There was nowhere safe, nowhere I could hide, because they had my father’s blood and they could use it to cast spells to find me.  There was only one place for me to go… to another time.  They sent me into the future, Eian, to the 21
st
century, and I’ve… I’ve only just returned.”  She quickly decided she wouldn’t tell him what Murdo had said about who her real father was.  She had no proof of that, and she didn’t want to believe it, anyway.  Even if someday she found out it was true, it was something she’d rather forget about. There was nothing she could do to change it.

             
She looked up nervously and was dismayed to see a wide grin on Eian’s face.  “Oh, I knew you wouldn’t believe me…” she dropped her head into her hands.  “Sometimes
I
don’t even believe me.”

             
He reached over and gently lifted her face to him.  “I do believe ye lass, because I’ve heard the same story once before… or at least a verra similar one.”

             
Allia pulled back in surprise.  “What?  What do you mean?”

             
“My brother, Bren.  His wife was also sent through time for safe-keeping, so to speak.  And came back again.  I think ye would have much in common with her.  Only, I dinna think she knew who she really was, or where she had been born, until she ended up with Bren at Creagmor and everything eventually came to light.  It must have been a fair shock to her, but I dinna think she’s complaining now.”  He smirked, thinking of how his brother hadn’t been able to keep his hands off his mate.  Probably still couldn’t.  He completely understood… now.

             
Allia shook her head in amazement.  “I hadn’t considered, I mean I… I never even thought there could be anyone else.  My god…  I’d like to meet her sometime, if you think that would be alright.” 
I’m not all alone in this, after all… 
The realization that there was someone else who would understand exactly how she felt lifted a weight from her mind.  She hadn’t realized exactly how heavy that weight was until now.

             
“Aye, I’m certain Faith would love to meet ye, too,” Eian said.  “She’s verra kind, and feisty, just like ye.”  His fingers brushed lightly over her cheek before moving to tuck a stray lock of hair behind her ear.  “I can bring ye home with me right now.  We can leave first thing tomorrow.”

             
Allia rolled her eyes and leaned away from his touch, smiling at his persistence.  “Do you ever give up?  No!  I’m not going anywhere with you.  I have things here that I need to do…”

             
“What things?”

             
“I… I can’t just leave.  Besides, if my uncle found out I left with you, it could start some sort of war or something.”  And what if she agreed to go to Creagmor with him, and things didn’t work out between them?  She would have to leave and go… where?

             
“Then I would fight and win ye from him.”

             
She laughed softly.  “You can’t just win me, I’m not some trophy!”

             
Eian frowned, his whole body tensing as if readying for a fight.  Of course he could win her, and she would be the finest trophy he could imagine!  “Lass, do ye want to go back to yer uncle or no?  Because if ye agree for even a moment to come with me, nothing will stop me from taking ye away...  And ye would make me the happiest man on this earth.”

             
Allia closed her eyes for a moment, silently begging him to say something else, something that would win her over completely and leave no doubt in her mind, because she wanted so much to just let herself fall… “Oh, Eian.  If only I could believe all of your pretty words.  But can I? So many people at Lochain warned me about you. I’ll bet you’ve used those words on a hundred women before me, and I wonder if the only reason you want me is because you like a good challenge.  I feel like once I give in, you’ll be tired of me within a week and move on to someone else.” 
There, she had finally voiced her biggest fear.

              Eian looked at the beautiful woman lying on her side just beyond his reach, in more ways than one.  God, is that what she thought of him?  Of course it was.  Because with any other woman, it would have been true, had been true, for years now.  The reputation that he had never before given a thought to, was proud of even, was now keeping him from having what he wanted most.  How would he ever be able to convince Allia that what he felt for her was different?  That he, a man who almost never slept alone, had not had a woman in his bed since the day he had first laid eyes on her?  And God knew he had needed one!  But no other woman would do, not ever again.  None of them smelled like apple blossoms and fresh rain.  None of them made his stomach flip over when he saw them, or made him want to drop to his knees, throw away his pride, and beg for just one kiss.  Only Allia did that to him.  His mate.  The other half of his very soul.

             
He reached out a hand to cup her face, because he just needed to touch her.  His heart was beating far too fast.  “There was a time, not long ago, when all of that would have been true.  I was shameless, I admit… but only because I didna ken there was anything else.  I didna ken there was something so far above anything I had ever felt before, that even the stars are within my reach, now.”  He swallowed hard.   “I have always lusted for life, for all that I can have of it… and for all of the pleasure, because I ken there will always be pain.  But from the time I met ye… hell, from the first time I saw ye,
everything
changed.  At first I thought to have ye just once, and that would be enough.  In truth, I’ve never cared to bed any woman more than once if I could help it, because I didna want to get too close.  But with ye, I was only fooling myself.  I could lie with ye a thousand times and more, and still it wouldna be enough.  A part of me kenned it from the beginning, Allia, but the idea frightened me so badly at first that I denied it to myself.  But no’ anymore.  I am yers forever, because ye are my mate.”