The Complete Groupie Trilogy (48 page)

“There’s more to life than money,” Iain insisted in the same even voice. “And you know it.”

“So this is about your little family life,” Vanni said as he hopped out of his chair and began to pace. “You’re going to leave us now, right as we’re getting started, to go play house?”

Iain also stood. “I will do what I think is right for my family. I have a bigger priority now than Dreaming in Blue. I’m home,” he said as he pointed out the window toward London. “And that’s where I plan to stay.”

Vanni grew even more agitated. “And what the hell are we supposed to do without you?”

Leo stood. “Don’t even worry about it, man. I got someone lined up in Los Angeles, ready to roll. He’s a studio musician but I’ve worked with him before. He’s hardworking and doesn’t complain, especially about success.” Leo sent a contemptuous glare in Iain’s direction.

Vanni didn’t care. He was totally focused on Iain. “So how long have you been planning this,
brother
,” he added for emphasis.

“Since Philadelphia,” Iain answered honestly. “It was a wakeup call for me, even if it wasn’t for you. I joined DIB to make music, not dodge bullets.”

The calm comment struck the bull’s eye. “Fuck you, man.” Vanni’s voice was low and angry. “You know that wasn’t my fault.”

“Wasn’t it? How many times did you let that crazy woman near you, near the people you claim to love? All for what? Your precious ego?”

Vanni smashed the bottle down on the ground and charged him. “Take that back!”

Iain shoved him so hard he lost his tenuous balance and sprawled on the floor. “You can’t take back a bullet, brother. And it doesn’t matter how much you drink or how wasted you get, you can’t change the past. The band will survive my leaving. The real question is will it survive you?”

Vanni struggled to his feet. “Get out,” he instructed, but Iain didn’t move. “I said get the fuck out! You want to leave, then go!”

Leo stepped forward. “Dude, he’s gotta stay for the last show. We can’t replace him at this short notice.”

Vanni’s mouth turned up in an evil smile. “We can replace him.” He glared around at everyone else in the room. “We can replace all of you. But you know who you can’t replace? Me. That’s right. I’m the star of Dreaming in Blue and everyone knows it. That’s why you want to leave,” he finished as he turned back to Iain, who merely shrugged.

“Think what you want to think, mate. Replace us all. You can even try to replace Andy if you want.” That hit home. “But eventually you’re going to have to face your own demons before it’s too late.” Iain turned on his heel and headed toward the venue for a sound check.

The other guys filed out silently behind him, while Leo lagged behind. “Eh, fuck him,” was his advice. “Only a stupid rat jumps from a ship that ain’t sinking. Trust me, by the time we get back home and you meet my guy you’ll see this has worked out for the best. You’re pulling these guys… you don’t need more dead weight.”

Vanni nodded as he scoped the room for more alcohol. His trip to the floor brought him frighteningly close to being knocked sober, and he wasn’t ready for that yet. The only reason he had been able to get through the last six weeks was through the numbing fog of intoxication. Nothing scared him more than waking up and feeling these betrayals and this abando
nment for real.

He wasn’t a good boy so he was being left once again. The s
cenario was painfully familiar.

Leo saw the need in his face so he reached behind his back for a flask of whiskey. “Here you go, man. Good for whatever ails you.”

Vanni threw it back effortlessly. It felt good as it burned its way down his throat. He smiled at Leo. “Thanks, man. Sometimes I think you’re my only friend.”

Leo patted him on the back. “I am. And don’t you forget it.”

The concert that night was even worse than the others before. Vanni kept changing the song list by starting songs that the guys hadn’t played in years. In one instance he started a song they had never played at all, and ended up singing a cappella. The crowd ate it up. The rest of the band got even by playing “Let Her Go if You Can’t Treat Her Right,” the song they had written for Andy. Vanni seethed as he sang it through gritted teeth, which only added to the drama and intensity of the song.

It was destined to be a viral video on the Internet by the time t
hey sang their encore song.

He didn’t even finish the encore. He tossed the microphone on the ground and stalked past the other members of the band before wading through the throng of groupies congregating backstage. He couldn’t get to his private dressing room fast enough. He needed to be alone, but apparently that wasn’t in the cards. Leo waited there with another cong
ratulatory bottle of champagne.

“I’d say the official close of your second tour was a success,” he toasted. “Now we can get back to L.A. and prep for number three.”

Vanni’s throat closed up just thinking about it. Back in L.A., back near Graham, back near Andy – and everything he had been running from for six weeks. He didn’t know how he was going to pull it off.

Leo just smiled as he motioned toward the second room attached to Vanni’s dressing area. It was a suite built for a star. “And to give you a little inspiration, I got you a gift.”

Vanni was instantly suspicious. “What kind of gift?”

“The other cure for what ails you. I’ll, uh, let
myself out.”

Vanni stumbled toward the bedroom part of the suite and found a voluptuous woman in lingerie sitting on the bed. From her hazel eyes to her generous hourglass figure, she was a carbon copy of Andy. So striking was the resemblance he thought for a moment it was her. “Andy?” he whispered as he
drew closer for a better look.

She shrugged. With an English accent she said, “I can be whoever you want me to be, love.”

She stood and walked to him with sexy undulating hips his own Andy probably never knew she had mastered. His body sprang to life in spite of itself. It’d been so long since he held her, since he had held anybody. All the raw frustration bubbled up to the surface as his hands circled her waist and slid up her sides to her breasts. “That’s it baby,” she purred but the accent was all wrong… it just tore him out of the fantasy in which he now wanted – needed – to immerse himself.

He shook his head as he led her toward the bed. “Don’t speak,” he commanded before he lifted her up and decisively planted h
er down on rumpled silk sheets.

Obediently she kept silent but responded with professional ardor as he lost himself in her. Whether he was loving and passionate, or raw and angry and punishing, she kept up with him all night. There were no complaints that he called her by another name or thought of anyone else
while he sank himself into her.

By the time she left the following morning Vanni was strangely sated in a way the alcohol could never substitute. Sex was the ultimate high. Maybe Leo was right, he decided. He just needed to choose the right partners. His Andy doppelganger offered all the release with none of the entanglement. It was as smooth a transaction as he had ever conducted. There was no guilt, there were no lies. Sex was the drug but love was the trap. And Vanni was determined to forever more avoid it at any cost.

Chapter Four

August 13, 2010. Los Angeles.

Andy

For the first time in nearly two months Andy finally, and begrudgingly, left Graham’s side. At long last the doctor gave Graham the green light to go home to Los Angeles and she had to fly ahead in order to prepare the house. Maggie had had several weeks by then to settle into a routine with Graham, which on most days was contentious at best. She pushed him and he resisted, which made him fire her on a weekly basis. Andy wasn’t sure they could handle the couple of weeks it would take to get everything ready but Maggie just gave her that patient smile that reassured her he was in the hands of a consummate professional. He could scream and bellow and pout and moan, but Maggie wasn’t going anywhere until he was physically able to stand up, get out of his chair, walk over to where she stood and throw her out.

Andy had been there the day she issued that particular ultimatum. She stared open-mouthed at the flame haired nurse with nerves of steel. Maggie had glared at Graham, hands on hips, defying him to literally stand out of nothing more than anger. Graham pursed his lips, grasped the handles of the chair and lifted himself up for the first time.

It was a pivotal moment, one that established Maggie’s authority. Graham still fought her but not as hard as before. Instead he focused his energy inward toward his recuperation. Andy tried very hard to get him to stop being so mean to her but Maggie didn’t care. As long as he felt
something
she had something she could work with, and he certainly had a right to be angry at the cards he’d been dealt. It did him good to have someone to scream at, and he’d never dream of doing that to Andy.

Frankly Maggie was ready for Andy to give them a little breathing room. The girl meant well but it was clear she felt enormous guilt for Graham’s condition. Maggie spotted his covert ways of manipulating her because of it. It was dangerously co-dependent and counterproductive, but she wasn’t sure yet how to make either of them see that. This two-week break was a blessing as far as she was concerned.

However when Andy stepped off that plane on Friday the 13
th
she felt a dark foreboding, like she was about to be thrown into the lion’s den. To know that she was back in Vanni’s world had her strung so tight she felt like she could shatter into a thousand pieces just from a faint breeze. Whether she wanted to or not she heeded an internal countdown of when they would see each other again. She knew he was in England for their last European concert, and within days he’d be back home again.

Against her better judgment she had kept close tabs on the entire debacle under the guise of taking care of DIB business for Graham. But it wasn’t Graham’s best interest she was thinking of when she’d pull up video after video from the tour, or pore over endless articles that detailed in upsetting detail Vanni’s new affinity for alcohol.

She felt sick when Alana finally called to break it to her friend Iain had had enough and was going to break away from the band.

She wouldn’t even get to see her friend again before she s
tarted her new life in England.

E
verything was changing so fast.

None of her friends were in Los Angeles to greet her, which made the homecoming all the more lonesome. If there had been any fairness in the world she would be coming home to Vanni, to start a new life finally as the woman by his side. But
fate had once again intervened.

She held her head up high as she scanned the airport for her hired car from the label. He drove her straight to Graham’s Malibu beach house, which seemed even lonelier and more barren after being empty for two months. She took her suitcases into the guest room and began to unpack for her lengthy stay. Several boxes had already been delivered from Tennessee, just her basic needs and some of her favorite things to help her feel at home. Her cat Simon was staying with her grandmother, and all the rest of her belongings had been packed away into storage. It gave her the opportunity to rent out her house while she stayed with Graham. It wasn’t as if she needed the income entirely, she had done fairly well with her finances up to that point. And there was no doubt she’d get paid a wage for what she would be doing for Graham’s business.

She was still on the payroll for overseeing the P.R. for the band, after all.

But she figured an empty house should be put to use so she allowed her grandmother to rent it to a young family from her church.

With any luck at all she would never have to go back to that life again. Graham would soon walk and she could pick up with Vanni where they left off.

Her stomach lurched when she thought of him. It was hard to stand in that guest room and not think of the last time they were there, when Graham caught them in a passionate embrace. That could never happen again, she thought to herself with a decisive shake of her head. Especially in the emotional shape Graham was in.

She wasn’t sure how she’d make it work but she knew she had to do something. Vanni was definitely going off the rails. He needed her as much as Graham did. Andy loved both men enough she knew she couldn’t let either of them down. She’d figure out a way.

The contractor met her at the house promptly at four o’clock that afternoon. They talked about the ramps they’d have to put in and the railings around the toilet and the tub. They ordered the new bed for his room and some of the medical supplies he’d need for his new challenges. It was going to feel like a hospital at first, which she knew would piss him off. So she ordered new fancy new bedclothes and books and blankets so he could feel more at home and pampered.

She also spent a little money on making Maggie’s room more welcoming. She added pillows and artwork for a pop of color, as well as a throw rug on the hard wood floor. When it came closer to their arriving from Philly she’d make sure cut flowers were in her room to help brighten it and make it more cheerful.

As for her own room she set out pictures of Simon, her grandmother Lydia, her parents. She had books and a jewelry box and the contents of her home office. Pictures or tokens of Vanni she kept packed away. That was not part of her life that she’d share while staying with Graham. It just wasn’t fair to him.