The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (887 page)

I don’t fear him, but I wish he were fatter! Cassius, if I were fearful, is the kind of man one should fear. He is well-read and watches everything closely. He has no joys, like plays or music. He rarely smiles, and if he does it’s at something he said. Men, like Cassius, are never at ease, especially around someone greater than themselves. Therefore, they are dangerous. I am just telling you what should be feared; not what I fear, for I am Caesar. Now, come on my right side, because my left ear is deaf and tell me what you think of him.

Trumpets play. Caesar exits with all his followers except Casca.

Casca

You pull'd me by the cloak; would you speak with me?

You tugged on my sleeve. Do you want to speak with me?

Brutus

Ay, Casca, tell us what hath chanced today,


That Caesar looks so sad.

Yes, Casca. Tell us what happened today that made Caesar look so sad.

Casca

Why, you were with him, were you not?

Why? Weren’t you with him?

Brutus

I should not then ask Casca what had chanced.

I wouldn’t have asked if I were.

Casca

Why, there was a crown offer'd him; and being offer'd him,


he put it by with the back of his hand, thus; and then the


people fell a-shouting.

Someone offered him a crown and he pushed it aside with the back of his hand, like this. Then, the people started shouting.

Brutus

What was the second noise for?

What was the second shout for?

Casca

Why, for that too.

Same thing.

Cassius

They shouted thrice: what was the last cry for?

They shouted three times. What was the last cry for?

Casca

Why, for that too.

Same reason as the first two.

Brutus

Was the crown offer'd him thrice?

Was the crown offered to him three times?

Casca

Ay, marry, was't, and he put it by thrice, every time gentler than other; and at every putting-by mine honest neighbors


shouted.

Yes and each time he turned it down gently, and the crowds started shouting.

Cassius

Who offer'd him the crown?

Who offered him the crown?

Casca

Why, Antony.

Antony.

Brutus

Tell us the manner of it, gentle Casca.

Tell us how it happened.

Casca

I can as well be hang'd, as tell the manner of it: it was


mere foolery; I did not mark it. I saw Mark Antony offer him a crown;--yet 'twas not a crown neither, 'twas one of these


coronets;--and, as I told you, he put it by once: but, for all that, to my thinking, he would fain have had it. Then he


offered it to him again: then he put it by again: but, to my thinking, he was very loath to lay his fingers off it. And then he offered it the third time; he put it the third time by; and still, as he refused it, the rabblement shouted, and clapp'd their chopt hands, and threw up their sweaty night-caps, and uttered such a deal of stinking breath because Caesar refused the crown, that it had almost choked Caesar, for he swooned and fell down at it: and for mine own part, I durst not laugh for fear of opening my lips and receiving the bad air.

I just as soon be hanged as to tell it, it was so foolish. I didn’t pay much attention. I saw Mark Antony offer him a crown. It was really just one of those head pieces. Anyway, Caesar turned it down, although I thought he wanted it. Then, Antony offered it to him again, and he pushed it away, but this time his hand stayed on it longer. Then, the third time Antony offered it the crowd went wild throwing up their sweaty hats and yelling that Caesar passed out. As for myself, I didn’t dare laugh, for fear of breathing in the stench.

Cassius

But, soft! I pray you. What, did Caesar swoon?

Tell us again. Did you say Caesar fainted?

Casca

He fell down in the market-place, and foam'd at mouth, and was speechless.

He fell down in the market-place and began foaming at the mouth. He couldn’t even speak.

Brutus

'Tis very like: he hath the falling-sickness.

Sounds like he has the falling sickness.

Cassius

No, Caesar hath it not; but you, and I,


And honest Casca, we have the falling-sickness.

No, Caesar doesn’t have it, but we do.

Casca

I know not what you mean by that; but I am sure Caesar fell down. If the tag-rag people did not clap him and hiss him,


according as he pleased and displeased them, as they use to do the players in the theatre, I am no true man.

I don’t know what you mean, but I am telling the truth. The crowd responded to him in pleasure and displeasure, just like they do in the theater.

Brutus

What said he when he came unto himself?

What did he say when he came around?

Casca

Marry, before he fell down, when he perceived the common


herd was glad he refused the crown, he pluck'd me ope his


doublet, and offered them his throat to cut: an I had been a man of any occupation, if I would not have taken him at a word, I would I might go to hell among the rogues:--and so he fell. When he came to himself again, he said, if he had done or said any thing amiss, he desired their worships to think it was his infirmity. Three or four wenches where I stood cried, "Alas, good soul!" and forgave him with all their hearts. But there's no heed to be taken of them: if Caesar had stabb'd their


mothers, they would have done no less.

Before he fell, he opened up his robe and offered them his throat to cut. If I were a different man, I might go to hell with that offer. Then, he fainted. When he came back around, he said it was just his illness. Three or four women by me cried, “Ah, poor soul!” But, they would have done that if Caesar had just stabbed their mothers.

Brutus

And, after that he came, thus sad away?

And after that, he came back looking so sad?

Casca

Ay.

Yes.

Cassius

Did Cicero say any thing?

Did Cicero say anything?

Casca

Ay, he spoke Greek.

Yes, he spoke in Greek.

Cassius

To what effect?

What did he say?

Casca

Nay, an I tell you that, I'll ne'er look you i' the face


again: but those that understood him smiled at one another and shook their heads; but for mine own part, it was Greek to me. I could tell you more news too: Marullus and Flavius, for pulling scarfs off Caesar's images, are put to silence. Fare you well. There was more foolery yet, if could remember it.

I don’t know. It was all Greek to me, but I can tell you those who understood him were smiling and shaking their heads. Also, Marullus and Flavius were punished for taking the decorations off the statues of Caesar. There was some more foolishness, but I can’t remember.

Cassius

Will you sup with me tonight, Casca?

Will you have dinner with me tonight, Casca?

Casca

No, I am promised forth.

No, I already have plans.

Cassius

Will you dine with me tomorrow?

How about tomorrow night?

Casca

Ay, if I be alive, and your mind hold, and your dinner worth the eating.

Yes, if I’m alive and you still will have me and of course if the food’s any good.

Cassius

Good; I will expect you.

Good, I’ll be expecting you.

Casca

Do so; farewell both.

You do that. Goodbye, fellows.

Exit

Brutus

What a blunt fellow is this grown to be!


He was quick mettle when he went to school.

What a forward guy he has become! He was always so shy in school.

Cassius

So is he now in execution


Of any bold or noble enterprise,


However he puts on this tardy form.


This rudeness is a sauce to his good wit,


Which gives men stomach to digest his words


With better appetite.

He’s smart though, even if he plays stupid. He comes across as abrasive, but it’s just a way to get people to listen to him.

Brutus

And so it is. For this time I will leave you:


Tomorrow, if you please to speak with me,


I will come home to you; or, if you will,


Come home to me, and I will wait for you.

You’re probably right. I’ve got to go, though. If you want to talk tomorrow, you can come to my house, or I will go to yours.

Cassius

I will do so: till then, think of the world.--

Sounds good. Till then, think about the world.

Exit Brutus.

Well, Brutus, thou art noble; yet, I see,


Thy honorable metal may be wrought,


From that it is disposed: therefore 'tis meet


That noble minds keep ever with their likes;


For who so firm that cannot be seduced?


Caesar doth bear me hard, but he loves Brutus;


If I were Brutus now and he were Cassius,


He should not humor me. I will this night,


In several hands, in at his windows throw,


As if they came from several citizens,


Writings all tending to the great opinion


That Rome holds of his name; wherein obscurely


Caesar's ambition shall be glanced at:


And after this let Caesar seat him sure;


For we will shake him, or worse days endure.

Well, Brutus, you are noble, but not so noble that you can’t be swayed. That’s why we must stick together. Caesar may not like me, but he loves Brutus. Now, if I was Brutus and he was me, he wouldn’t have listened to me tonight. So, I will write several letters in different handwriting to disguise their true sender to convey the feelings of Rome; Brutus is loved and Caesar is too ambitious. After that, let’s see how long Caesar keeps his throne or worse.

Exit.

Thunder and lightning. Enter Casca with his sword drawn opposite of Cicero.

Cicero

Good even, Casca: brought you Caesar home?


Why are you breathless, and why stare you so?

Good evening, Casca. Are you coming from Caesar’s house? Why are you breathless and bewildered?