The Curious Charms of Arthur Pepper (6 page)

BOOK: The Curious Charms of Arthur Pepper
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“He's right. I've decided to visit Graystock Manor. It's the place where the tigers live, in Bath.”

“I've heard of it. But, Dad...”

“Bernadette and her son, Nathan, were headed that way and asked me to join them.”

“And you wanted to go...?”

“Well, Nathan is looking at universities. I'm, er...well, I thought it would be a change.”

Lucy closed her eyes. Her father wouldn't even have a cup of tea with her if it wasn't scheduled and now he had taken off with his flame-haired neighbor. He had been holed up in the house for a year. She sensed there was something not quite right about this sudden trip, that her father was keeping something from her. “It's a long way to go on a whim.”

“It's got me out of the house.”

Lucy had worried that her father might be vulnerable living on his own. The newspapers were awash with stories about gullible pensioners. Now she didn't know what to think. Why had he agreed to go with Bernadette all the way to Bath when she couldn't get him to go to the garden center for a potter around the bedding plants? She tried to control anxiety from coming through in her voice. “When are you coming home?”

“I don't know what time I'll be back. I'm at a bed-and-breakfast now, and then off to Graystock tomorrow. Anyway, I have to go now, darling. I'll give you a call when I get home, shall I?”

“Dad...
Dad
.” The line went dead. Lucy stared at her mobile.

She was about to ring him back, but then she started to think about his other strange habits, his strict routines. Whenever she saw him he wore that dreadful mustard sweater-vest. He hadn't phoned her for weeks. He talked to his plant.

She'd never thought of her parents as old until Mum died. But she did now. If her dad could no longer cope on his own, she would have to start looking into home help or even old people's homes. She wondered how quickly his mind would go.

Her mouth went dry as she imagined helping him upstairs, feeding him, taking him to the toilet. Instead of a baby to look after, she would have her father.

She stood up and her knees wobbled as she walked toward the garden gate. On top of everything else that had gone wrong in her life, she now had to deal with her father succumbing to dementia.

Bed-and-Breakfast

THE BREAKFAST BEING
served downstairs at the B and B smelled delicious. At home he and Miriam only ate cereal. If he had toast, then it had to be with Flora margarine rather than Anchor or Lurpak butter. Miriam said that he had to look after his cholesterol, even though the doctor had tested and told him that it was low. Arthur was used to waking and smelling only freshly washed cotton sheets rather than a full English fry-up. This was a treat. But he did feel guilty about his wife not being here to enjoy it, too.

Despite having dropped off yesterday in the car on the way to the B and B, he had slept right through the night. It was the seagulls that had woken him that morning, cawing overhead and tap-dancing on the roof.

After his phone call with Lucy last night, he had felt rather tired. He knocked on Bernadette's door and asked if she minded if he didn't join her and Nathan for dinner. An early night beckoned and he would see her the next morning. Bernadette nodded but gave him a look to show she was deeply disappointed in him.

He showered, dressed and shaved and made his way to the breakfast room. It was rather jolly, with yellow wipe-clean tablecloths, silk daffodils and framed seaside postcards on the wall. Bernadette and Nathan were already seated at a table for four by the window.

“Morning,” he said brightly, joining them.

“Nin,” Nathan managed as he poked at the flowers with his knife.

“Good morning, Arthur,” Bernadette said. She reached out and lowered her son's hand. “Did you sleep well?”

“Like a log, actually. And you?”

“I didn't have a good night. I woke around three and then things started to wander around my mind. I couldn't stop them.”

Arthur was about to ask what she had been thinking about but a young waitress who wore a smart black skirt and a yellow blouse offered tea or coffee. He noticed that she had an anchor tattooed on one wrist and a rose on the other. This seemed to be a disturbing new trend for young people. He couldn't understand why such a pretty girl would want to resemble a sailor. Then he scolded himself for being such a fuddy-duddy. Miriam had always encouraged him to be more liberal. “I like your tattoos.” He smiled. “Very nice.”

The waitress gave him a confused smile as if she knew the tattoos looked like they had been done by a toddler with access to a needle and pot of ink. Arthur ordered tea and requested a full English breakfast minus the grilled tomatoes.

He and Bernadette both stood at the same time and walked over to the sideboard on which sat miniboxes of cereal and a glass jug of milk. Arthur picked up Rice Krispies and carried them back. Bernadette picked two boxes of Frosties. “They never give you enough in these little boxes,” she said.

The three of them ate in silence. Nathan looked as if he was about to fall asleep at the table—his head was bowed and his hair almost dangled in his bowl.

After they had finished, the waitress took the bowls and brought over their cooked breakfasts.

“These sausages look really tasty,” Arthur said to Nathan, trying to make conversation.

“Are.”

“You mean,
they
are,” Bernadette corrected.

Nathan's face was blank. He speared a full sausage and ate it from his fork. Arthur was sorely tempted to give his foot a kick under the table. He was sure that Bernadette would have taught her son excellent table manners.

“We're going to look at the first university today. It looks promising,” Bernadette said. “Are you coming with us, Arthur?”

“If you don't mind, I'm going to head off to Graystock. I'll take the train to Bristol and change for Bath there.”

“I'm sure it's only open on Fridays and Saturdays, and today is Tuesday.”

“It doesn't need to be open to the public. I can knock on the door.”

“I think maybe you should phone ahead...”

He wasn't in the mood to be told what to do. He was feeling rather single-minded and had made up his mind that he was going to pursue his mission. He cut into his bacon.

“And where shall we pick you up afterward?”

“I can't ask you to do that. I'll make my own way home from the manor.”

Bernadette's face fell a little. “You can't do that. It will take you ages. We've only booked in here for one night.”

“You've done enough for me already,” Arthur said firmly. “I shall visit and then see what the day brings.”

“Well, don't be rash. Ring and let me know. You're welcome to travel back with us. But I do want to be back for my class.”

“Class?”

“Mum does belly dancing.” Nathan sniggered.

Arthur chewed. An unwelcome image of Bernadette wearing purple chiffon and shaking her hips popped into his head. “I didn't know that. It sounds, er, energetic.”

“It gives me a bit of exercise.”

Nathan sniggered again.

Bernadette ignored him. “How is your bacon, Arthur?” she asked.

“It's great,” Arthur said. He was glad that he was going to spend time alone today. Whatever he found out about Miriam should be private. He wanted to be on his own with his thoughts. “I like my bacon nice and crispy. And don't you worry about me at all. I'll be just fine visiting the manor on my own.”

The Tiger

BERNADETTE AND NATHAN
dropped Arthur off at the Cheltenham train station. He had decided to walk the two miles to Graystock Manor after arriving in Bath.

It had seemed a good idea at the time. The sun was out and the birds were singing. Arthur started off happily, tugging his case across the station forecourt, past the queue of black cabs. From a map he had sketched on a piece of paper, he headed across a small roundabout, then onto a B road that led all the way to the manor house. He felt quite the adventurer, proud with himself that he had taken this decision. He strode forward purposefully.

The pavement soon ran out and he found himself traversing nettles and thistles that prickled his ankles. The ground underfoot was uneven and he wished that he had worn his sturdy brogues rather than his gray suede moccasins. It was virtually impossible to wheel his suitcase across the stones and gravel that pocked the pathway. He alternated between dragging and carrying it along.

“Oi, Granddad.” A shiny red sports car whizzed by and he was sure that someone's backside hung out of the back window.

After half a mile or so, the pathway narrowed. He found himself wedged between a scratchy hedgerow and a wide, raised curbstone. Unable to manhandle his case any farther, he stopped and stood with his hands on his knees while he caught his breath. The farthest he had walked since Miriam died was to the post office. He was seriously out of condition.

There was a gap in the hedge and he stood and watched a bumblebee. Cows stood, placid and chewing. He admired a red tractor plowing the field. He set off again but there was a pile of bricks and a wire shopping basket in his way. This was the last straw. He couldn't stand tugging the suitcase any longer. He picked it up and pushed it into the gap in the hedge, then rearranged the foliage back around it.

Looking around he made a mental note of his location. He was opposite a road sign for a car trunk sale this Sunday and there was another sign that said Longsdale Farm 1 Mile. He would carry out his visit to Graystock and then pick up his case on the way back. It was made from sturdy nylon so a stay in the hedge should see it just fine.

He was lighter and quicker now. It was usually Miriam who planned what to take on their trips. The house would become overrun with small piles of things—underwear, his shaving stuff, cookie two-packs and sun cream in every conceivable SPF. He doubted very much if she would be impressed by his stashing of his suitcase in a bush. However, he felt rather pleased with himself. He was being resourceful, making decisions and pushing on.

Graystock was still a way away and he pressed onward, not stopping to admire the bursts of shepherd's purse that sprung from beneath the hedges or the fields of yellow rapeseed. He refused a lift from a couple of attractive blonde girls who pulled up alongside him in their silver convertible, and also informed a tractor driver that, thanks for asking, but he wasn't lost. People really were rather pleasant around here and he could forgive the bum-baring incident by the boys in the red car. The sun must have brought out their hijinks.

When he finally got to the gates of Graystock Manor he was met with a peeling wooden sign. Most of the letters had fallen off. It said Welcome to Gray Man.

They must have known I was coming
, Arthur thought. Then he stared with dismay at the lengthy driveway that curved its way to the manor. He could see the building through the trees.

Graystock had once been magnificent. It now had a decayed glamour like it should feature in a moody 1980s pop video. The Doric pillars flanking its huge front doors were crumbling. The stone was the color of the fluff picked up in Arthur's Dyson vacuum. A few of the upstairs windows were broken.

He stood with his hands on his hips for a while, aware that he was going to uncover another chapter of Miriam's life. He didn't know whether to feel excited or afraid.

By now he really needed to use the loo. He looked around in the vague fantasy that a toilet block might suddenly sprout up from nowhere. His only option was to find a bush. Hoping that no tourists were around to see him, he headed into the undergrowth and did a wee. A gray squirrel bounded over, took a quick glance at him and then ran up a tree. It sat on a branch, its whiskers twitching as he finished up. Thankfully he had a handy packet of wet wipes in his pocket and he cleaned his hands before carrying on his journey.

His breath came in short wheezes as he trekked toward the hall. Why hadn't he accepted Bernadette's offer of a lift? He could be a stubborn old git at times.

The manor was surrounded by tall black iron railings. The double gates were secured by a heavy brass padlock. Arthur pressed his face to the railings and peered through. The doors to the hall were shut. Why he had imagined he could simply stroll up to the manor and ring a doorbell he didn't know. His feet were sore and the wet wipe had made his hands sticky.

He stood there for at least ten minutes, feeling useless and not sure what his next move might be. But then he saw movement—a flash of blue behind the rosebushes in the gardens. Lord Graystock. Arthur stood on his tiptoes. The shape moved out of the bushes. The lord wore electric blue slacks and was stripped to the waist. His chest was boiled-lobster red.

“Hello,” Arthur called out. “
Hello.
Lord Graystock.”

The lord didn't hear, or did and ignored the shout. It was then that Arthur spied a brass bell with a curled iron handle concealed by branches. He tugged on it but the sound was muffled by the trees. He jumped up to tug the branches and twigs away, but they sprang back into place. He gave the bell a final tug and rattled the gates, but it was no use. From a distance he watched his target for a while. Lord Graystock stuck his hands into his pockets and strolled around his grounds. He stopped to sniff at roses or to pluck out weeds. His rounded red stomach wobbled over his waistband.

Was the man deaf? Arthur thought. How had he ever managed to attract a harem? Surely Miriam couldn't have been one of his girls.

Frustrated, he started to follow the railings around the ground, trailing his fingers along them as he went. He stopped sporadically to raise himself onto tiptoes to peer into the gardens. The manor was like a fortress.

Then he discovered that in one place, around the back of the house and shielded by a huge oak tree, the railings no longer stretched to the ground, but instead from a low brick wall. He had an idea.

First looking around to make sure he was alone, he tried to lift his right leg high enough to climb up onto the wall. He could then peer over the top of the railings for a better view. But his knee locked when he tried to raise it, making a disconcerting crunching sound. He bent over, rubbed it and then tried again. Cupping his hands behind his knee he hoisted it up so he could place the sole of his foot flat on the wall. He grabbed hold of the railings and then pulled with all his might to get his other leg off the ground. When he felt his second foot standing firmly on the wall he felt such a feeling of euphoria.
Life in the old dog yet.
He allowed himself a few deep breaths and pressed his face to the railings again.

There was a scuffling noise and an orange-eyed Jack Russell stared up at him. A lady wearing a silk patterned head-scarf and a khaki Barbour jacket looked Arthur up and down. “Can I help you?” she said.

“No. I'm fine, thank you.” He stood as nonchalantly as he could do with both hands clutching the railings.

The lady stood her ground. “What are you trying to do?”

Arthur thought too quickly. “I'm trying to find my dog. I think he might have gone over the railings.”

“Those railings are at least ten-foot high.”

“Yes. Tsk.” He nodded. If he didn't speak and didn't explain, then she might move away. He went into his National Trust statue mode.

The lady pursed her lips. “I'm going to be ten minutes walking my dog. If you're here when I'm walking back, I'm going to call the police. Okay?”

“Okay.” Arthur shook his leg to release his trousers, which had rolled up slightly over his sock during the climb. “I assure you that I'm not a burglar.”

“I'm glad to hear it. I hope you find your dog. Ten minutes...” she warned.

He waited until she had moved away. Today had been a disaster. He should have stayed at home and read the
Daily Mail
. But then he saw a flash of electric blue trouser. Damn it. He had to get the man's attention. He stood and rattled the railings but they didn't budge. So he began to wave. “Lord Graystock. Lord Graystock. Lord Graystock,” he shouted. This felt idiotic, like he was at a rock concert. But it
had
to work. He had traveled for miles for this. He had gone against the voice in his own head that had told him to stay at home in his daily routine. There was no way he was going back without an answer.

The woman and her dog would return. If he was going to do this, then he had to be quick. Without another thought Arthur spotted a ridge of metal along the top of the railing. He used all his might to lift his leg up and wedge his foot on the ridge. With strength he didn't know he possessed, he managed to clamber up onto the top of the railing. He hung there for a moment, then rallied himself.
Come on, Sir Edmund Hillary. Up and over, old son.
He steadied himself and flipped his leg over. He jumped. The iron fleur-de-lis on the top of the railing got fastened in the hem of his trouser leg. There was a loud tearing noise as he dropped onto the lawn. Looking down he saw that his left trouser leg was torn to the thigh so it looked as if he was wearing a strange sarong. No matter. He was over. He stood and strode toward the manor house, his left leg exposed.

The grass was damp and squeaky. The buttery sun made it sparkle. It was a beautiful day. Arthur gave a sigh of relief. Birds twittered and a red admiral butterfly alighted on his shoulder for a few seconds. “Hi, there,” he said. “I'm here to find out about my wife.” As he lifted his head to watch as it fluttered away, he didn't see the brick on the lawn.

He kicked it, then felt his ankle twist. He stumbled sideways, falling to the ground, and then rolled onto his back. Beetle-like he tried to right himself, but his legs and arms flailed feebly in the air. He tried again and then groaned. The fall had winded him. His ankle throbbed. He had made it over the dizzying heights of the railings and then been foiled by a brick.

He lowered his legs and arms and looked up at the sky. It was Wedgwood blue and a cloud shaped like a pterodactyl drifted by. An airplane left a vapor trail. Two cabbage whites flew higher and higher until he could no longer see them. The brick lay beside his ear. It was chipped around the edges as if it had been chewed.

He tried to right himself again by sucking in his stomach and attempting to sit up, but it was no use.
Idiot
, he sighed. He would have to do his statue thing for a while before he tried to move again. He wondered if he had ever come across a National Trust statue that lay prostrate. Hmm, probably not. Lifting up his leg he tried to rotate his twisted ankle. It circled and clicked. It wasn't as bad as he first thought. The manor was in striding distance. He was nearly there. A few more minutes and he'd roll onto his side and get up. He would crawl there if need be.

It took him a few seconds to realize that he was no longer alone.

First of all he sensed movement beneath his fingertips as the grass rumbled. It was a strange feeling, not a thumping, or a buzzing, but more of a padding sensation. Something brushed his right foot. A dog? A squirrel? He tried to move his head, to raise it, but a pain shot down his neck. Hells bells. Ouch, that hurt.

The next thing he knew, his view of the sky was obliterated by something big. It was something with fur. It was something orange, black and white.

Oh, good God.
No.

The tiger stood over him. Its face was so close that he could feel its meaty breath burning his cheek. There was an unmistakable tang of urine. Something heavy pressed down on his shoulder, forcing it into the earth. A paw. A huge paw. Arthur wanted to screw his eyes shut but he couldn't help but stare, hypnotized by this great beast.

The tiger had black lips and whiskers the thickness of crochet needles. Its lips curled and a string of drool glooped down, down into Arthur's ear. He wanted to reach up and wipe it away, but he daren't move. This was it. He was a dead man. He turned his head slightly so the drool slid out onto the grass.

When he'd imagined his death (and he thought about it often now Miriam was gone), his preferred method was to fall asleep and not wake up—though he would want someone to find him straightaway. It would be awful if he began to create a stink. And he wanted to look serene, not have his face screwed up in pain or anything. He supposed Lucy would find him, so that wouldn't be nice for her. It would be most useful if he could have a premonition about his death and be prepared for it. If he could be sure that, say, in fifteen years on, say, March 8, he would go to sleep and not wake up, he could tip Terry off the day before. “If you don't see me tomorrow morning, then feel free to break in. You'll find me in bed, dead. Don't be alarmed. I
know
it's going to happen.”

BOOK: The Curious Charms of Arthur Pepper
7.46Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
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