Authors: Z. Elizabeth
I retrieve my phone with one eye closed, the other squinting, and unlock it to find a text from Matt. Giving it an open, I find his text loaded with pictures of Craig and I, along with a video attached. I stumble back to bed, flicking the light off before flopping down and poking Craig from his post-sex shut eye. He murmurs and opens his tired eyes.
“Want to see the pictures and video of us?” I ask.
He gives me a blank look before I turn my attention back to my phone, strolling through the photos on the message. Matt, bless his very perverted heart, has captured us in both cute and provocative embraces. From my slut-dropping on Craig to our heavily kissing stage to us just smiling at one another. Got to be said, we really do look like a glowing couple in absolute love with each other and I let out a quiet sigh with a sad smile playing on my lips.
No, Nic, do not count down the months
When I reach the end of the text, Matt signs it off with “please do porn” and I have no control over the snort that I let out. I look over to Craig, my hand over my mouth, and see that he is asleep, his breathing steady and even. He looks so worn-out but at peace. I lock up my phone and snuggle under the sheets. I take one more look at Craig and my chest feels tight from all the emotions I feel for him. It takes a while, but I eventually fall asleep, only when Craig moves and wraps his arms around me.
Home. This is home.
Chapter Fourteen
7 months left
Nic
Another month has passed and it's another month closer to July, and the divorce. Winter has crawled up on us and gone are the long, summer nights with weekend BBQ's and beer gardens, replaced with dark evenings, curling up on the sofa with a blanket and hot chocolate. Winter has always been my favourite month, and not just because of Christmas. Okay, it is because of Christmas. But come on, who doesn't love Father Christmas visiting and opening the little doors on the Advent calendars every morning to get that piece of chocolate.
I've been trying not to count down the months since Kelsie told me to live for the moment, telling me it was stupid to waste energy marking each day that passes. I should instead be embracing the days, enjoying the time with Craig. It's hard, and time isn't really on our side but I'm learning to take each day at a time. And because of that, Craig and I have gotten closer and it's made a real difference. I love him with everything, and he's pretty much one of my best friends now too. We share things along with kissing and shagging, but in the end, it doesn't end up awkward and although my heart is cracking every day, I tape it back up and get on with things. It's the only thing I can do otherwise I have my best friend screaming in my head. It's time to throw out everything I’m scared of and embrace them instead, which is why Craig and I decided to break tradition this year and skip Christmas with our parents, and have our own, with our friends. They weren't happy, as you can imagine and I had the 'you would rather have Christmas with
him
than us?' speech from my mother and Craig had a similar speech from his father, but we told them that it's our first Christmas together and we want to spend it with
together.
Making our own memories
together
. Of course, my mother screamed that the only memory would be the
divorce
and that there is no point trying to be a
real couple
. I slammed the door in her face on my way out of the house.
That night Craig came home with a tree, an artificial one after I texted him about my mother's outburst and we spent the night putting it together, decorating it with colourful baubles, multi-coloured tinsel and fairy lights. The finishing touch was a beautiful Angel on top of the tree, which we had bought the weekend before while shopping in Cardiff. We may not be real, but watching the lights flash in the tree, seeing the tinsel sparkle, I felt like I was finally home. And this year was going to be the best damn Christmas ever, I truly believed that.The best damn memory of Christmas I would ever have. But before the last few windows of chocolate are eaten, I have to get through work before I can enjoy the festivities.
Despite it being the last day, tonight is also my work's night out – on Black Friday of all days! Craig has already been off for a week and I hate leaving him in bed alone, and I say that because I am too jealous that he gets a lie-in and I don't! But I do get two weeks off and I can't wait to just pig out, stay up late, sleep in and just generally bum about in the apartment.
Since the group night out, Jamie and Tammy have been spending a lot of time together and it's actually been really nice to see Tammy calm down her fun-loving side and have someone as awesome as Jamie on her arm. Jamie has also integrated into our group nicely too. Since he and Tammy are 'dating', Craig has tolerated him more since he doesn't have 'his eyes on me' any more.
After finishing up some articles, sending a few emails to clients to wish them a Happy Christmas and New Year, the clock chimes five o'clock and I give a little ‘whoop,’ shut down my laptop and gather up all my belongings. Shouting a 'goodbye' and 'see you later' to everyone in the office, I converse quickly with Jamie about him coming over and going to the club together around eight o'clock for drinks and karaoke.
Whizzing home in my little green car, I fly up the stairs and unlock the front door in expert timing. Throwing my coat and bag on the sofa, I frown that all the lights are off and it looks like Craig isn't in the flat. It shouldn’t bother me because I need to start getting ready for the night out but I would have liked to have seen him after my tedious work day. But I know that if I don't see him, the gang will be in the club waiting for Jamie and I to finish our party so we can have our very own Black Friday night.
I turn on the Christmas lights, adding some spirit and colour to the flat, and start up the shower. When I'm sure the temperature is perfect, I step inside and relax against the tiles, the hot water running over my tired body. Lots and lots of drink are definitely being consumed tonight to keep me alert and awake, mixed with lots and lots of energy drinks.
Let's just hope I don't make a fool out of myself this year and get given yet another nickname. I don't think I would ever live it down.
Craig
The past few months have been the best and worst of my life so far. This whole marriage thing is easier than it seems – it's perfect that Nic and I get on so well; it doesn't hurt that everything I do for her is because I love her. And that is why I am now standing in front of her parents house and not at home waiting for her to crash through the door and watching her get ready for her work's night out right now, distracting her with my mouth and hands.
After speaking to my father a few weeks ago, the secret has been playing on my mind. I want to tell Nic, but I know how strongly she doesn't want to know. I also know that if she knew I knew, I would be kicked out on my arse and never spoken to again. It would destroy her but it's been hell keeping it to myself and if I have any chance of reconciling my dad and Peter, then I need to hear his side of the story too. Need to see if it collaborates with my dads and if there is any way we can fix it. I need to fix it. For my sake as much as theirs. I want my dad happy. So here I am, sweaty palms and debating whether to press the doorbell or not, whether to just turn around, and go see my girl before she goes out. I shake my head and turn around, pussying out, but as I do the front door opens and Peter steps out, closing the door behind him. I know he's noticed me and he doesn't look happy at all. His face contorts into utter frustration and I feel like this is perhaps the wrong thing to do. It may make matters worse. I continue to stand awkwardly, not knowing whether to make the first move. Peter looks back at the house before looking down the street. With a heavy huff, a quick nod of his head and a flick of his arm, I’m following him around the house and up the garden to his shed. I get a feeling of deja-vu of when I did this with my father and grin that the two ex-best friends are still more alike than they care to admit. With the door firmly shut behind us, Peter locks it and takes a seat on one armchair while I take the other. He stares at me for a minute, the nerves in my stomach doubling but before I can say anything, he gets there first
“What can I do for you, Craig? You do realise Kerry will beat into you if she knows you are here. You aren't exactly flavour of the year.” He asks.
“I, uh, I know everything,” I blurt out, watching the realisation seep onto Peter's face and his mouth form an 'O'. He definitely wasn’t expecting me to say that, probably more to bitch about his wife for the way she treated Nic last week. If I wanted to do that, I'd go straight to Kerry and have it out with the woman herself.
Peter leans forward and clasps his hands together. I don't move a muscle and try to hold my ground. From the stories I've faintly heard of Peter, he's the more laid back one, the one who doesn't let things get to him. I wonder if he really knows what Kerry has been doing to Nic all her life. Wonder if he would be so calm then. But right now, sat in front of him I don't know what is going to happen next, and to be honest with you, what I’m not expecting him to do is to burst out laughing. “Oh, Craig, so you understand how idiotic we both were at seventeen then?”
Say what now?
I sit, staring at him, confused as to why he's not biting my head off. I'm pretty sure if Nic asked right now, she would get hers bitten off by her mother, so why is it that the fathers are the more understanding ones?
“Come on, Craig, you have to understand that we were young, and in love and stupid boys with egos the size of houses. We could have easily reconciled, but our prides got in the way and the later we left it, well over thirty years went by and we found it easier to just stay away from each other.”
“But, Peter, I don’t understand. You two have basically said the same thing to me, in so many words. Why can't you just ring each other up, get a drink down the local and hash it all out?” I ask, watching him take a deep breath and shake his head.
“The lady in my life, that is what. You know what Kerry did and what she is like around you. She can't let things go and it would be hard for the gossiping bitches of Swansea to keep something as big as your father and I meeting up a secret,” he explains, “I presume you know what went down?” I give him a nod. “Well then that should answer it.” He concludes.
Fucking women and them ruining a perfectly great friendship. I know for a fact that a woman is never going to come between Rob and I.
Peter leans forward and pats my knee. “I know you are trying to help us out, Craig, I know this is probably the reason that our parents made you and Nic get married but some things are just better left alone. I don't want my personal life splashed around the community again. I know this could be sorted out, but it's just not time yet. I have no 'beef', as you kids say, with your dad but let's get you and Nic to the year mark and see what happens. ”
I shrug, kind of understanding his reasoning, but it makes me hate Kerry even more.
“It took guts coming here today knowing that Kerry would slice your throat with her words but thank you for trying to get two old friends to reconcile. Who knows, maybe one day?”
“I really hope so, Peter, I really do.”
Chapter
Fifteen
Craig
Where are you? Xx
It's been 10 minutes since I've sent that text to Nic and so far no reply. She's normally pretty fucking quick at replying so I'm beginning to get, a) pissed off and, b) Worried. Although I know she's in no harm and she has Jamie with her, I thought she would be attached to her phone awaiting my text. Okay, so that makes me a little self-centred but seeing as this club is packed, there are douchebags stumbling around and leering at whomever is in sight, I’d rather her next to me, away from all the dicks that come out to play on Black Friday. Scrap that, who come out to play every weekend.
I have a death grip on my phone, and my eyes are flickering through the nightclub. The lights are flashing which is making it harder to pin anyone down, let alone my little short arse and I know everyone on the table is watching me with amusement. I haven't touched my beer, which is pissing Rob off seeing as he paid triple the cost for it. I finally got to tell him about the deal the other week and although he was put out that I kept it from him, he knew the reasoning behind it all. It's just made him damn annoying and more pushy about me professing my love to Nic. I told him it would happen in due time and right now, the smirk on his face tells me that I am acting just like him. But DAMMIT I feel like a lost puppy without her; so pathetic.