The Deer Park (35 page)

“The family feels the same way about you, H.T.,” Teddy said.

“I hope so, sincerely I hope so. It would break my heart if all the young people here didn’t reciprocate. You don’t know how much I think about all of you, about your problems, your heartaches, and your successes. I follow your careers. You know, Teddy, you’d be surprised how much I know about the personal lives of all of you. I even follow to see how religious you are, because I believe in religion, Teddy. I’ve changed my religion and a man don’t change his religion like he takes a drink of water. I can tell you I’ve found great consolation in my new faith, there’s a great man in New York, a great religious man, I’m proud to call him one of my dearest friends, and he made things so you and me can go through the same church door.”

“I guess I haven’t been going to church enough lately,” Teddy said.

“I hate to hear that. I’d give you a lecture if there wasn’t something else I want to talk about.”

Teppis held up his arms. “Look, what am I showing you? Two hands. Two hands make a body. You see, I feel as if I come from two faiths, the one I was born with, and the one I changed to and elected. I think I’ve inherited the wealth of the tradition from two great faiths. Am I confusing you?”

“No, sir.”

“You take my first faith. One of the most heart-warming customs of the people I was born in, it was the concern the parents of the family took in all the doings of their children, the engagements, the weddings, the births of young people. I could tell you stories make you cry. You know the poorest house, dirt-poor people, they would take the same interest in arranging the marriage of their children as for a royal marriage. Now, this is a democratic country, we can thank God for that, we don’t approve of royal marriages, I don’t approve of it myself, I would never dream of doing such a thing, but there’s a lot to be said on both sides. I was talking to the Bey Omi Kin Bek on this very subject, and you know what he said to me, he said, ‘H.T., we don’t arrange marriages the way the American public tends to think, we just encourage them, and then it’s up to the kids.’ That’s a first-rate article, genuine royalty. I’ll say to any man I’m proud to have the Bey for a friend.”

“I think a lot of people like to look down on royalty,” Teddy said.

“Sure. You know why they do it? Envy.” Teppis took out his handkerchief and spit into it. “People are envious of the people at the top.”

“My idea,” said Teddy, “is that royalty is like everybody else. Only they express themselves more.”

“You’re wrong,” Teppis interrupted. “Royalty pays a terrible price. Let me tell you a story. What is it about public men that makes them different? It’s that they’re in the eye of the public. They got to lead a life as clean as a dog’s teeth, privately,
not only public. You know what scandal is to a public figure? It’s a bomb ten times bigger than the atom. They got to do certain things, it breaks their heart to do them, and why? the public responsibility demands it. That’s true for royalty and it’s true for movie stars, and fellows like me, people like you and me, that’s who it applies for. Those are the laws, try and break them. We’re talking like equals now, aren’t we, Teddy?”

“Face to face,” Teddy said.

“You look at that picture I have,” said Teppis pointing to the painting. “I would hate to tell you how much I had to pay for it, but the moment I looked at that French picture with that beautiful mother and her beautiful child, I said to myself, ‘H.T., it don’t matter if you got to work ten years to pay for it, you got to buy that picture.’ You know why I said that to myself? Because that picture is life, it’s by a great painter. I look at it, and I think, ‘Motherhood, that’s what you’re looking at.’ When I think of you, Teddy, and I know what goes on in your heart, I think that you think about settling down with a beautiful bride and children that come out to greet you when you come home from work. I never had anything like that, Teddy, cause when I was your age, I worked long hours, very long hours, hours that would break your heart to tell you about them, and when I’m alone, I sometimes think to myself, and I say then, ‘You know, H.T., you missed the fruits of life.’ I would hate for a fellow like you, Teddy, to have to say the same thing. And you don’t have to. You know with all that’s due respect to my wife, may she rest in peace, she had to work very hard herself, only for those early years, but she never complained once, not a peep.” Tears filled Teppis’ eyes, and he wiped them away with a clean handkerchief he kept in his breast pocket, the aroma of his toilet water passing across the room. “Take any girl you would marry,” Teppis went on, “you wouldn’t have such problems, you could give her all the financial security, you know why, she’d make you settle down. I’d
even sit down with you and your business agent and we’d have a talk how to straighten you out financially so you wouldn’t have to borrow from us ahead of your salary.” Teppis frowned at him. “It’s a shame, Teddy. People will think we don’t pay you nothing the way you got to borrow money.”

“I’d like to talk to you about that, Mr. T.,” Teddy said quickly.

“We’ll talk about that, we’ll go all into it, but now’s not the time. You just remember, Teddy, that you’re an idol of the American public, and an idol never needs to worry about money so long as he’s clean with his public.”

Teppis poured himself a glass of water, and drank it slowly as if he would measure the taste. “I know a young fellow like you with the world at his feet,” he went on, “there’s a lot of times he don’t want to get married. ‘Why should I get married?’ he says to himself, ‘What’s in it for me?’ Teddy, I’ll tell you, there’s a lot in it for you. Just think. The whole world is in a strait jacket so it says, ‘You, over there, you get in a strait jacket, too.’ Know why? The world hates a bachelor, he’s not popular. People try to drag him down. The stories you hear, ninety-nine per cent of the time unfounded, but I’d be ashamed, I couldn’t look you in the eye to tell you the kind of stories I have to listen to. It’s enough to revolt your stomach. I hear a story like that, I let them have it. ‘Don’t tell me that kind of filth about Teddy,’ I say, ‘I don’t want to hear it. If the boy don’t want to get married, it got nothing to do with all those dirty rotten stories you tell me, period.’ That’s how definite I am. People know me, they say, ‘H.T. is on record as being against slander.’ ”

Abruptly, Teppis pounded his desk. “A rumor about a fellow like you, it spreads like hot cakes. We get letters from your fan clubs all over the place. Kokoshkosh, towns like that. Small-town America. Two-Bits, Kansas. You see what I mean? What do you want? You know what those letters say, they say that the members of the Teddy Pope fan club are brokenhearted
cause they heard the most terrible stories about Teddy. Their loyalty is shaken. Listen, Teddy, I go to your defense, you know why? It isn’t because of business reasons, or because I know you for a long time, or even because I like you, although I do. It’s because I know deep down that you’re going to prove I’m right, and I wouldn’t go to bat for a person even if they meant a million dollars to me if I didn’t think they would prove that H.T. is right in the long run. That’s confidence. Should I put that confidence in you?” Teppis held up a finger. “Don’t answer, you don’t even have to answer, I know I can put confidence in you.” He got up and walked to the window.

“You know something, I’ve had my confidence rewarded already. I took a look in the papers. That picture of you and Lulu where you’re holding hands in Desert D’Or. It’s one of the most beautiful, impressive, and touching things I’ve ever seen. Young love, that’s what it said. It made me wish that same famous painter on my wall was still alive so I could hire him to paint the photograph of the young love of you and Lulu.”

“Mr. Teppis,” Teddy said, “that was a publicity picture.”

“Publicity! Listen, do you know how many of the most successful marriages in this industry started with just publicity? I’ll tell you. The answer is ninety-nine per cent of the most successful marriages began just that way. It’s like a dowry in the old country. I know you, Teddy, you’re a clean-cut boy. I’ve seen a lot of photographs. I don’t believe that you and Lulu can look at each other like two love-doves and be fakers. Don’t try to tell me Lulu isn’t crazy about you. That girl is wearing her heart on her sleeve. Teddy, I’ll tell you, Lulu is one of the finest girls I know. She’s a real fine American-type girl of real American stock. Such a woman is a gift of God. When I look at my mother’s picture on this very desk, you know what I get? Inspiration. I carry her picture next to my heart. You should be able to do the same.”

Teddy was perspiring. He leaned forward to say something,
and said no more than, “Mr. Teppis—you have to allow me the right to say …”

“Stop!” said Teppis, “I don’t want to hear your ideas. You’re a stubborn boy. Why are you so stubborn when you know what’s in your heart? You want to agree with me. But you’re confused. You need a man like myself to set you straight.”

In a quiet voice, Teddy said, “Mr. Teppis, you know very well I’m a homosexual.”

“I didn’t hear it, I didn’t hear it,” Teppis screamed.

“That’s the way I am,” Teddy muttered. “There’s nothing to be done about it. What is, is.”

“Philosophy?” Teppis shouted. “You listen to me. If a man sits in … 
shit
, he don’t know enough to get out of it?”

“Mr. Teppis, don’t you have a big enough heart to understand my feelings?”

“You’re the most ungrateful boy I ever knew. You keep me up nights. What do you think, sex it’s the whole world? I forget what you said, do you understand? I wouldn’t want it on my conscience. You watch. I’ll drive you right out of the movie business.”

“Let me try to say …”

“Lulu, that’s what you got to say. I know what goes on. You’re a coward. You got a chip against society. You should love society with all it’s done for you. I love society. I respect it. Teddy, you’re a sick boy, but you and me can lick this thing together.” Teppis held up a fist. “I don’t want to persecute you, but I never heard of anything so perverted in my whole life.”

The buzzer sounded. “All right, all right,” Teppis said into the interoffice phone, “you tell the party in question to wait. I’ll be with that individual in a minute.”

“Mr. Teppis,” Teddy said, “I’m sorry. Maybe I’d like to have children, but I’ve never once had relations with a woman.”

Teppis clicked the switch back to its “off” position, and stared for many seconds at Teddy Pope. “Teddy, we’ve talked
a lot,” he said. “What I want is that you promise me you won’t make up your mind ahead of time that you personally aren’t able to boff a beautiful sexy girl like Lulu. Do I have to be there to help you? I’m telling you, you can. That’s all I ask of you, Teddy, don’t make up your mind. Sleep on it. Is that a bargain?”

Pope shrugged wearily.

“That’s the boy. That’s Teddy Pope talking.” Teppis walked him to the door. “Now, Teddy, nobody is forcing you into anything. If you said yes this very minute, I would still say, ‘Teddy, sleep on it.’ Now, could anybody claim I was trying to push you into a single thing?”

“Who would dare?”

“You’re right. I don’t force people. Never. I talk things over with them. Someday, Teddy, you’re going to say, ‘God bless you, H.T.’ ”

Once Teddy was out the door, Teppis flipped the buzzer again. “All right, send Lulu in,” he said. He waited by the door to greet her and held Lulu at arm’s length while he looked at her. “I wish I could tell you the kind of pleasure it is to have you lightening up this office,” he said to her. “Sweetie, you take a load off all my worries, and on that desk are sitting one thousand worries.” Now, he held her hands. “I love a girl like you who brings sunshine into this room.”

Probably Lulu had managed to look no more than seventeen. “I love you, too, Mr. T.,” she said in her husky little voice.

“I know you do. Every one of my stars, they tell me that. But with you, I know it’s sincere.” He guided her to the chair in which Teddy had been sitting, and from a drawer in the Italian desk, he took out a bottle of whisky and dropped some ice cubes in a glass.

“Oh, Mr. T., I’m not drinking these days,” said Lulu.

“Nonsense. I know you. Sweetie, you got no respect for me. You think you can twist me around your little finger,” he said
cordially. “Well, I got news for you. There’s no man in the world you can’t twist around your finger. But I understand you, sweetie, I’m crazy about you. I don’t want you thinking you got to take a drink behind my back.”

“I think you’re the only man who understands me, H.T.,” Lulu said.

“You’re wrong. Nobody can understand you. Know why? You’re a great woman. You’re not only a great actress but there’s greatness in you as a person—fire, spirit, charm—those are the sort of things you have. I wouldn’t want this to get around, but I don’t care if you take a drink. You’ve earned the right to do anything you want.”

“Except when I disagree with you, H.T.,” Lulu said.

“I love you. What a tongue. You got impetuosity. I say to myself, ‘H.T., what is there about Lulu that’s smash box office?’ and I don’t even have to ask myself the answer. It’s in a word. Life,” Teppis said, pointing a finger at her, “that’s what Lulu’s got.”

He poured himself a small drink and sipped it politely. “You’re wondering why I asked you up here?” he said after a pause. “I’ll tell you. I’ve been thinking about you. Know my personal opinion of Lulu Meyers? She’s the greatest actress in this country, and this country’s got the greatest actors in the whole world.”

“You’re the greatest actor in the world, Mr. T.,” Lulu said.

“I take it as a compliment. But you’re wrong, Lulu, I can’t act. I’m too sincere. I feel things too deeply which I can’t express. There’re nights when I stay awake worrying about you. You know what eats my heart out? It’s that I’m not the American public. If I was the American public, I’d make you Number One on the Bimmler Ratings. You know what you are now?”

“Seventeen, isn’t it, Mr. T.?”

“Seventeen. Can you believe it? There are sixteen actors in this country the American public buys ahead of you. I don’t
understand it. If I was the public I’d buy Lulu Meyers all the way.”