The Difference Engine (23 page)

“It’s that rascal’s,” Mallory declared. The Coughing Gent’s crushed hat had been liberally soaked in a puddle of stale piss, though no one saw fit to mention this unspeakable fact.

“Sorry to miss your own hat, sir,” Bligh said. “Likely stolen by some street-arab.”

Oliphant, with the faintest wince of involuntary distaste, examined the mined topper, turning it over and inverting the lining. “No maker’s mark.”

Mallory glanced at it. “Engine-made. From Moses & Son, I should say. About two years old.”

“Well.” Oliphant blinked. “I presume that evidence rules out any foreigner. A London veteran, surely. A user of cheap macassar oil, but a man of enough cranial capacity to have a certain cunning. Put it in the rubbish, Bligh.”

“Yes, sir.” Bligh left.

Mallory patted the clock-case with deep satisfaction. “Your man Bligh has done me a great service. Do you think he would object to a gratuity?”

“Most decidedly,” Oliphant said.

Mallory felt the gaffe. He gritted his teeth. “What about these guests of yours? Might I be permitted to thank them?”

Oliphant smiled with abandon. “Why not!”

He led Mallory into the dining room. The mahogany legs had been detached from Oliphant’s dining-table, and the great polished surface now sat on its corners of carven gingerbread, mere inches above the floor. Five Asian men sat about it, in cross-legged alien dignity: five sober men in their stocking feet, wearing tailored evening-suits from Savile Row. All the men sported tall silk toppers, tugged low over their clippered heads. Their hair was very short and very dark.

And a woman was with them as well, kneeling at the table’s foot. She had a look of mask-like composure and a silky black wealth of hair. She was wrapped in some voluminous native garb, bright with swallows and maple-leaves.

“Doctor Edward Mallory san o goshokai shimasu,” Oliphant said. The men rose with peculiar grace; rocking back a bit, sliding one foot beneath them, and coming up quite suddenly to a supple-legged stance, as if they were ballet dancers.

“These gentlemen are in the service of His Imperial Majesty the Mikado of Japan,” Oliphant said. “This is Mr. Matsuki Koan, Mr. Mori Arinori, Mr. Fusukawa Yukichi, Mr. Kanaye Nagasawa, Mr. Hisanobu Sameshima.” The men bowed from the hips, each in turn.

Oliphant had made no attempt to introduce the woman; she sat with expressionless rigidity, as if secretly resenting the gaze of an Englishman. Mallory thought it wise not to mention the matter, or pay her much attention. Instead, he turned to Oliphant. “Japanese, are they? You speak the lingo, do you?”

“A diplomatic smattering.”

“Would you please thank them for so gallantly fetching my clock, then?”

“We understand you. Dr. Marori,” said one of the Japanese. Mallory had immediately forgotten their impossible names, but thought that this one might be called Yukichi. “It is honor to us to assist British friend of Mr. Laurence Oliphant, to whom our sovereign has expressed obligation.” Mr. Yukichi bowed again.

Mallory was utterly at sea. “Thank you for that courteous speech, sir. You’re a very well-spoken gentleman, I must say. I’m not a diplomat myself, but I do thank you sincerely. Very kind of all of you . . . ”

The Japanese conferred among themselves. “We hope you are not badly hurt by barbaric assault on your British person by foreigners,” said Mr. Yukichi.

“No,” Mallory said.

“We did not see your enemy, nor any rude or violent person.” Mr. Yukichi’s tone was mild, but his glinting eyes left Mallory little doubt as to what Yukichi and his friends would have done had they met such a ruffian. As a group, the five Japanese had a refined, scholarly air; two were wearing rimless spectacles, and one had a ribboned monocle and dandyish yellow gloves. But they were all young and deft and sturdy, and their toppers were perched on their heads like Viking helmets.

Oliphant’s long legs buckled suddenly beneath him, and he sat at the head of the table with a smile. Mallory sat too, his knee-caps popping loudly. The Japanese followed Oliphant’s lead, quickly tucking themselves into the same positions of arid dignity. The woman had not moved so much as an inch.

“Under the circumstances,” Oliphant mused, “dreadful hot day, a tiring foray after enemies of the realm — a small libation is in order.” He lifted a brass bell from the table and rang it. “So, let’s get friendly, eh? Nani o onomi ni narimasa ka?”

The Japanese conferred, their eyes widening, with happy nods and sharp grunts of approval. “Uisuki . . .”

“Whiskey, an excellent choice,” said Oliphant.

Bligh arrived momentarily, with a trolley of liquor bottles. “We’re low on ice, sir.”

“What’s that, Bligh?”

“Iceman wouldn’t sell cook but a bit. Price has trebled since last week!”

“Well, ice wouldn’t fit into the doll’s bottle, anyway,” said Oliphant lightly, just as if that remark made sense. “Now, Dr. Mallory, pay close heed. Mr. Matsuki Koan, who happens to hail from the very advanced province of Satsuma, was just demonstrating to us one of the marvels of Japanese craft — who was the craftsman again, Mr. Matsuki?”

“She is made by sons of Hosokawa family,” said Mr. Matsuki, bowing in place. “Our lord — Satsuma daimyo — is patron.”

“I believe Mr. Matsuki will do the honors, Bligh,” said Oliphant. Bligh handed Mr. Matsuki a whiskey bottle; Mr. Matsuki began to decant it into an elegant ceramic jug, at the right hand of the Japanese woman. She made no response. Mallory began to wonder if she were ill, or paralyzed. Then Mr. Matsuki fitted the little jug into her right hand with a sharp wooden click. He rose, and fetched a gilded crank-handle. He stuck the device into the small of her back and began to twist it, his face expressionless. A high-pitched coiling sound emerged from the woman’s innards.

“She’s a dummy!” Mallory blurted.

“More a marionette, actually,” Oliphant said. “The proper term is ‘automaton,’ I believe.”

Mallory drew a breath. “I see! Like one of those Jacquot-Droz toys, or Vaucanson’s famous duck, eh?” He laughed. It was now obvious at a glance that the mask-like face, half-shrouded by the elegant black hair, was in fact carved and painted wood. “That blow must have addled my brains. Heaven, what a marvel.”

“Every hair in her wig put in by hand,” Oliphant said. “She’s a royal gift, for Her Britannic Majesty. Though I imagine the Prince Consort, and especially young Alfred, might take quite a fancy to her as well.”

The automaton began pouring drinks. There was a hinge within her robed elbow, and a second in her wrist; she poured whiskey with a gentle slither of cables and a muted wooden clicking. “She moves much like an Engine-guided Maudsley lathe,” Mallory noted. “Is that where they got the plans?”

“No, she’s entirely native,” said Oliphant. Mr. Matsuki was passing little ceramic cups of whiskey down the table. “Not a bit of metal in her — all bamboo, and braided horsehair, and whalebone springs. The Japanese have known how to make such dolls for many years — karakuri, they call them.”

Mallory sipped his whiskey. Scotch single-malt. He was already a bit squiffed from Oliphant’s brandy — now the sight of the doll made him feel as if he had blundered into a Christmas pantomine. “Does she walk?” he asked. “Play the flute perhaps? Or any of that business?”

“No, she simply pours,” said Oliphant. “With either hand, though.”

Mallory felt the eyes of the Japanese fixed on him. It was clear that the doll was no particular marvel to them. They wanted to know what he, a Briton, thought of her. They wanted to know if he was impressed.

“She is very impressive,” he blurted. “Especially so, given the primitive nature of Asia!”

“Japan is the Britain of Asia,” Oliphant said.

“We know she is not much,” said Mr. Yukichi, his eyes glinting.

“No, she’s a marvel, truly,” Mallory insisted. “Why, you could charge admission.”

“We know she is not much, compared to your great British machines. It is as Mr. Oliphant says — we are your younger brothers in this world.”

“We will learn,” said another Japanese, speaking for the first time. He was likely the one called Arinori. “We have great obligation to Britain! Britain opened our ports with the iron fleet. We have awaked, and learnt great lesson you have teached us. We have destroyed our Shogun and his backward bakufu. Mikado will lead us now, in great new progress age.”

“We will be allies with you,” said Mr. Yukichi, nobly. “The Britain of Asia will bring civilization and enlightenment to all Asian peoples.”

“That’s very laudable of you,” said Mallory. “It’s a bit of a hard slog, though, civilization, building an empire. Takes several centuries, you know . . . ”

“We learn everything from you now,” said Mr. Arinori. His face was flushed; the whiskey and heat seemed to have kindled a fire in him. “We build great schools and navies, like you. In Choshu, we have an Engine! We will buy more Engines. We will build our own Engines!”

Mallory chuckled. The queer little foreigners seemed so young, so idealistic — intelligent, and above all sincere. He felt quite sorry for them. “Well! It’s a fine dream, young sir, and does you credit! But it’s no simple matter. You see, we in Britain have devoted great effort to those Engines — you might well call that the central aim of our nation! Our savants have worked on Enginery for decades now. For you, in a few short years, to achieve what we have done . . .”

“We will make whatever sacrifice is necessary,” said Mr. Yukichi, calmly.

“There are other ways to improve the homeland of your race,” Mallory said. “But what you propose is simply impossible!”

“We will make whatever sacrifice is necessary.”

Mallory glanced at Oliphant, who sat with a fixed smile, watching the wind-up girl filling china cups. Perhaps the faint chill in the air was only Mallory’s imagination. Yet he felt he had blundered somehow.

There was silence, broken only by the ticking automaton. Mallory got to his feet, his head pounding. “I appreciate your kindness, Mr. Oliphant. And the help of your guests, of course. But I can’t stay, you know. Very pleasant here, but press of business . . .”

“You’re quite sure?” Oliphant asked cordially.

“Yes.”

Oliphant lifted his voice. “Bligh! Send cook’s boy to fetch Dr. Mallory a cab.”

Mallory’s night passed in sodden fatigue. He woke from a confused dream, in which he argued Catastrophism with the Coughing Gent, to hear repeated knocking at his door.

“A moment!” He flung his bare legs from bed, yawned groggily, and tenderly cradled the back of his skull. His bruise had bled a bit in the night, leaving a pinkish stain on the pillow-slip, but the swelling was down and he did not feel feverish. Likely it was the therapeutic work of Oliphant’s excellent liquor.

Pulling a nightshirt over his perspiring nudity, he wrapped himself in a dressing-gown and opened the door. The Palace concierge, an Irishman named Kelly, stood in the hall with a pair of glum-faced chars. They were equipped with mops, galvanized buckets, black rubber funnels, and a push-cart crowded with stoppered jeroboams.

“What is the time, Kelly?”

“Nine of the clock, sir.” Kelly entered, sucking his yellow teeth. The women trundled in after him with their cart. Gaudy paper labels declared each ceramic bottle to contain “Condy’s Patent Oxygenating Deodorizer, One Imp. Gallon.”

“What’s all this?”

“Manganate of soda, sir, to see to the Palace plumbing. We plan to flush every closet. Clear the Palace pipes out, straight down to the main drains.”

Mallory adjusted his robe. It embarrassed him to appear with his feet and ankles bared before the charwomen. “Kelly, it won’t do a dashed bit of good if you flush your pipes straight to Hell. This is metropolitan London, in a wretched hot summer. Even the Thames stinks.”

“Have to do something, sir,” Kelly said. “Our guests are complaining, most vigorously. I can’t say as I blame them, sir.”

The women funneled a jug of the decoction, which was bright purple, into the bowl of Mallory’s water-closet. The deodorizer emitted a piercing ammoniacal reek, far more vile in its own way than the lingering taint in his rooms. They scrubbed wearily at the porcelain, sneezing, until Kelly pulled the cistern-chain with a magisterial gesture.

Then they left, and Mallory dressed. He checked his notebook. The afternoon’s schedule was crowded, but the morning had only a single appointment. Mallory had already learned that Disraeli’s tardiness made it best to allot him half the day. With luck, he might find time to take his jacket in for French cleaning, or have a barber trim the clots from his hair.

When he went down to the dining-room, two other late breakfasters were chatting over tea. One was a cabinet-man named Belshaw, the other a museum underling whose name might be Sydenham. Mallory couldn’t quite recall.

Belshaw looked up as Mallory entered the room. Mallory nodded civilly. Belshaw gazed back at him with barely concealed astonishment. Mallory walked past the two men, taking his customary seat beneath the gilt gas chandelier. Belshaw and Sydenham began to talk in low, urgent tones.

Mallory was nonplussed. He had never been formally introduced to Belshaw, but could the man possibly resent a simple nod? Now Sydenham, his pudgy face gone pale, was casting sidelong glances at Mallory. Mallory wondered if his fly was open. It was not. But the men’s eyes goggled with apparently genuine alarm. Had his wound opened, was his hair dripping blood down his neck? It did not seem so . . .

Mallory gave his breakfast order to a waiter; the servant’s face, too, was wooden, as if the choice of kippers and eggs were a grave indiscretion.

Mallory, growing steadily more confused, had a mind to confront Belshaw on the matter, and began to rehearse a little speech. But Belshaw and Sydenham rose suddenly, quitting their tea, and left the dining-room. Mallory ate his breakfast with grim deliberation, determined not to let the incident upset him.

He went to the front desk to fetch his basket of mail. The usual desk-clerk was not on duty; taken down with a catarrh of the lungs, his replacement said. Mallory retired with his basket to his customary seat in the library. There were five of his Palace colleagues present, gathered in a corner of the room, where they were anxiously conversing. As Mallory glanced up, he thought he caught them staring at him — but this was nonsense.