The Disneyland Book of Secrets 2014: One Local's Unauthorized, Rapturous and Indispensable Guide to the Happiest Places on Earth (23 page)

A
ctor
James Baskett
, who played
Uncle Remus
, earned an honorary Oscar for the role.
Walt
, deeply impressed by
Baskett
’s work, had
led the
Oscar campaign;
Baskett
died shortly after receiving the award.  Despite
Walt
’s best intentions and
Baskett
’s substantial talent, the film’s tone and attitudes relating to the African-American characters were off-key well before the 1980’s.  There’s a reason
Disney
doesn’t release
Song of the South
on home video or DVD.  (For much more on this controversial film, read
Disney
historian
Jim Korkis
’ 2012 book
Who’s Afraid of the Song of the South?  And Other Forbidden Disney Stories
.)

M
usically and thematically, however,
Baxter
had tapped a mother-lode of inspiration when drawing upon the film’s timelessly lovely and lively songs, such as
How Do You Do
and
Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah
, and animated characters like
Brer Fox
,
Brer Bear
, and the always clever
Brer Rabbit
.  (“Brer” is a folksy contraction of “brother”.)

T
he
Imagineers
designed
Disneyland
’s new mountain in the soft, earthy palette of the southern wilds, with woodsy browns, green grasses, and rich but muted red clay earth.  Visually it would be a seamless extension of the bayou landscape of
New Orleans Square
and a transition to the backwoods of
Critter Country
.  The mountain was topped with stony
Chickapin
Hill
and the giant hollow tree trunk that
Brer Fox
calls home.

Being above all
else storytellers, the
Imagineers
crafted a storyline that propels Guests in log-type watercraft through a series of exterior streams and falls, and interior dark-ride caverns and hollows, past a wealth of singing
Audio-Animatronic
animals, as
Brer Rabbit
repeatedly escapes the traps and wrath of
Brers Fox
and
Bear
.

Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah
and other
Song of the South
tunes play throughout the voyage, enriching the visual narrative.  The eight-minute story culminates like the famous American folk tale, with the Guest, in lieu of
Brer Rabbit
, escaping by plunging dramatically into the safety of the briar patch far, far below.

It took years of design and testing and construction, but finally the concrete was poured, shaped and painted.  The mountain rose to a height of only 87 feet, making it
Disneyland
’s smallest peak, despite being almost as tall as a nine-story building.  Its foundations were sunk deep into the earth and its interior was honeycombed with the myriad hollows and channels in which the story unfolds.  The rescued
America Sings
figures were installed, the lighting, music, and motions were synchronized, and thousands of gallons of rushing water were poured into the mix.

When it came time to test the attraction,
Michael Eisner
helped to lead the way, wrapped in a garbage bag to shield him from the torrents of water, and followed by the intrepid and brilliant
Imagineers
who had conceived and built the mountain. 
Eisner
enjoyed the voyage so much that he immediately asked to ride again.

It was a good sign, and prophetic.  After launching on July 17, 1989,
Disneyland
’s 34
th
anniversary,
Splash Mountain
became one of the park’s top attractions and top draws and did in fact put
Critter Country
on the map.  Although many Guests enjoy
Critter Country
’s shady nooks,
Pooh Corner
store, invigorating
Davy Crockett’s Explorer Canoes
, and charming
Winnie The Pooh
attraction,
Splash Mountain
remains the big draw, particularly during the hot California summers, attracting loyal repeat ridership.  As recently as March of 2011, a
Disneyland
Facebook poll revealed that the favorite
Disneyland Resort
attraction based on an animated
Disney
film is–you guessed it!–
Splash Mountain
.

Because of its popularity,
Splash Mountain
’s queue is one of the longest in the park during the summer months.  It winds through a serious of rustic structures with folksy visual touches and words of wisdom, but waits can reach 90 minutes, and even the most whimsical environment can pall after that passage of time.  Guests are well-advised to get a
FastPass
for this attraction, and get it early in the day, before the
FastPasses
run out.

Even with a
FastPass
, on a busy day you might have to wait ten minutes or longer before boarding, but it’s well worth the wait.  On cold or rainy days lines are understandably much shorter.  In fact, since you’re getting soaked anyway, rainy days are a great day to make this journey, as long as you have dry clothes (at least dry socks!) and hot cocoa waiting for you.

When
Guests finally reach the loading area, Cast Members direct them into one of several lines and ask how many members are in the Guests’ groups.  Log vehicle capacity is about six Guests (there’s room for both an adult and child in the wider sixth seat).  Based on the number of people in your party you’ll be told which numbered loading gates to stand in front of.  Don’t step into the vehicle until you’re given the green light by Cast Members.

Each
transport bears the face of a
Song of the South
animated character on its prow.  The log craft (made of durable, modern materials, not actual logs) are partially submerged in water and they’re wet inside from repeated splashdowns, so everything is slippery.  Step with caution and be sure to assist any little ones in your party.  Alert Cast Members if you have questions or need special assistance.  One of the main types of injuries reported at the park involves slip-and-falls at
Splash Mountain
.

As with the park’s other
major boat conveyance attractions,
Pirates of the Caribbean
and “
it’s a small world
,” there are no seat belts or restraints in the log vehicles.  It’s therefore particularly important to follow all safety instructions and remain seated within the craft at all times.  There are interior handrails for Guests to grip when tumbling down the attraction’s multiple falls.

The
drenching 52-foot plunge, which for most Guests is the payoff, is truly thrilling, the steepest in
Disneyland
, and particularly stunning because the ride preceding it is gentle by comparison.  There are a few initial drops and splashes, but nothing on par with the final descent.

That said, the
attraction is by no means tame or saccharine; there are descents from the get-go, during the journey around the exterior of the attraction, most notably the early
Slippin’ Falls
, all foreshadowing the final dramatic drop.

Guests are disoriented, looped around and around outside and within the mountain, periodically sent tumbling down lesser descents, then chain-pulled back up. 
One loses all sense of direction and time.

The dark ride
within the mountain is extensive and complex, and increasingly menacing, with
Brer Fox
and
Brer Bear
growing angrier and angrier as
Brer Rabbit
continues to get the better of them.  The elaborate tunnels and
tableaux
are surreal; Guests truly feel as if they’ve been drawn into an animated folk tale.  Tension builds visually and musically to a dramatic showdown.

The steepest uphill chain-pull is right before the final drop.  The music
darkens tonally as your log vehicle is caught by the chain, and you are tipped back and have a clear view of your approaching doom, the circle of sky high above where sunlight faintly pierces the mountain.  This is when your heart starts to pound, and you might wish you could exit.  The suspense builds and crackles.  There’s no “chicken switch” and no turning back.

When you reach the cave mouth at the top, the
sunlight hits you square in the face and you instantly tilt down the flume at what feels like a 90-degree straight-vertical pitch.  It feels that way to passengers, and it looks almost vertical to Guests viewing from
Mill View Lane
, but it’s actually a sloping 47-degree angle–still awfully steep.

Some p
assengers scream, some shriek, some shout with exhilaration.  If you’re a thrill-seeker, you’re in heaven.  If you’re afraid of heights, you’re reciting some type of prayer.

You rocket down the watery track, all 52 feet of it,
the equivalent of roaring down a five-story building at 40 miles per hour.  Your stomach leaps into your chest, and your heart leaps into your throat.  You drop underground, into the briar patch, plowing up waves of water that completely soak the front riders and splash the back passengers.

This bears repeating: 
Guests sitting in the front of the log vehicles are thoroughly drenched by the final splashdown,
so don’t sit in the front unless you are prepared to be soaked
.  Riders in the back will be splashed too, but not so completely.  Passengers in the fifth and sixth seats might only have their sneakers and hair soaked.

If you want to ride but stay dry, you can bring or purchase an inexpensive, folding plastic poncho. 
Disneyland
shops sell them for about $10 each.  You might want to keep a spare pair of dry socks and sneakers in a park locker (locker rentals start at $7).

After plunging into the briar patch,
Guests drift within a gentle channel near the
Rivers of America
, then loop back into the mountain for a well-deserved extravagant finale.  In a show-stopping number, a large cast of
AA
characters (those rescued from
America Sings
) sing
Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah
in a vividly-hued set piece including eye-popping candy colors and a miniature riverboat.  Guests enjoy the show while starting to wring the gallons of water out of their hair and clothes.  This finale is also visible to riders on the
Disneyland Railroad
when they pass through the tunnel between the
New Orleans Square
and
Toontown Train Stations
.

When your log craft is drawn into the unloading area, it moves rapidly, and the channel narrows dramatically at that point.  Adult
Guests will want to watch their teens and children and be sure no one is trailing their hand or arm in the water; it’s never a good idea at any point in the voyage, but at this point, where the channel is going to contract suddenly and squeeze up against the sides of the vehicle, it’s particularly important.

As creative and wondrous as this attraction is, it’s
not for Guests who are afraid of heights, steep drops, or water, who have bad backs, are pregnant, get motion sick, and so forth.  Warning signs along the queue detail the restrictions.  Guests must be at least 40 inches tall to ride.  If you are in doubt whether you or members of your party can handle
Splash Mountain
, you can speak to a Cast Member about your specific concerns.

If truly i
n doubt, skip this experience.  There are plenty of other thrilling attractions to take in without risking your peace of mind.  Go to
Pooh Corner
where you can browse and nosh a tasty
Honey Pot
Crispie
while waiting for your party.  Go to the nearby
The Many Adventures of Winnie The Pooh
or the
Haunted Mansion
.

I braved
Splash Mountain
so that I would have a better perspective for this book; I was glad I did, but not being a fan of steep drops, I thought my first ride might be my last.  I was lucky that my heroic brother sat at the front of the craft, taking the brunt of the soaking, and my adventurous sister, brother-in-law, and niece also got soaked!  As it happens, I
did
ride
Splash Mountain
again in 2012, and enjoyed its flow and dips and music and surreal dark ride imagery.  The big plunge was
slightly
less terrifying that time around.