The Disneyland Book of Secrets 2014: One Local's Unauthorized, Rapturous and Indispensable Guide to the Happiest Places on Earth (53 page)

BOOK: The Disneyland Book of Secrets 2014: One Local's Unauthorized, Rapturous and Indispensable Guide to the Happiest Places on Earth
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The
Columbia
is not intended to represent a pirate ship, but it’s impossible to view the ship or stride its decks without scenting a bit of danger and blackguardism, the romance of piracy as well as the romance of the sea.

Guests in 1958 would have images in their minds of
classic swashbuckling pictures like Errol Flynn’s “Captain Blood” (1935) or “The Sea Hawk” (1940), 1942’s “The Black Swan” or even more recent films like 1952’s “Against All Flags” (Flynn again) and Burt Lancaster’s “The Crimson Pirate”. 
Disney
had released its own pirates-and-treasure live-action production of
Treasure Island
in 1950, basing it on the famous Robert Louis Stevenson novel.

Guests in 2009 not familiar with those classic films are at least likely to be
well versed in the
Disney
Pirates of the Caribbean
films, which thrillingly resurrected a genre that seemed to have vanished.

Not only do
Guests overlay their own piratical perceptions on the ship, but the
Columbia
, while not strictly speaking a pirate ship, intensifies her buccaneer flavor by portraying a pirate ship in the nightly
Fantasmic!
shows, when
Captain Hook
and
Peter Pan
battle in the rigging.

The ship is a beauty, sleek and trim, painted black and
dark mustard with red accents.  The main mast towers to a height of 84 feet.  That’s taller than
Sleeping Beauty Castle
, which is only 77 feet tall, and nearly as tall as
Splash Mountain
, which tops out at 87 feet.  As was traditional for sailing ships, a carved figurehead adorns the
Columbia
’s bow, below the bowsprit, a brown-haired lady in a flowing white gown trimmed with gold and surmounted by a blue shawl and red-sashed blue girdle.  She wears a golden crown on her brow.

The practice of carving figureheads on the front of ships is ancient.  Different cultures chose different subjects for their bow figureheads, from beautiful women to dragons, lions, snakes, horses, birds, legendary beasts
, or heroes.  The purposes of figureheads were as varied as their designs.  Some were meant to strike terror in enemies; some identified the ship; some embodied the
anima
or inner spirit of the ship, which was traditionally held to be female.  The
Sailing Ship Columbia
’s figurehead is certainly a benign and cheerful spirit.

Boarding the ship is a more complicated endeavor than simply strolling onto the decks of the
Mark Twain
.  Cast members will direct you to climb the left or right side of a mobile staircase that will be in place on the ship’s port side while it’s moored.  This is a real ship on real water, so step carefully, hold the handrail, hold tight to your little ones and follow all Cast Member instructions and posted signs.

Once aboard, you’re in for a treat.  The views of
Frontierland
,
New Orleans Square
,
Critter Country
, and
Tom Sawyer Island
are lovely.  Striding the deck of the ship itself is a time-traveling experience.  The planks creak beneath your feet as you stroll.  The masts and rigging stretch high above you as the sails ripple in the breeze.  Although
Disney
is famous for inviting Guests to interact with their surroundings, for obvious safety reasons Guests are not allowed to climb the
Columbia
’s masts or rigging.  Only Cast Members are allowed aloft.

If you want to observe the landscape during the voyage, prior to departure stake out a position along the port side (for mainland views) or starboard (for views of
Tom Sawyer Island
).  Afraid of or irritated by loud noises?  Then don’t stand on the foredeck, where the
Gunner’s Mate
is going to fire two cannon shots (don’t worry, they’re blanks) to warn off pirates near the northern tip of
Tom Sawyer Island
.

Guests on the port side near
Critter Country
can catch a glimpse of
Splash Mountain
riders floating in a hidden channel near the
Rivers of America
.

While the ship is under way, traditional sea tunes like “Blow The Man Down” play over unseen speakers
, and a seadog-sounding narrator provides historical commentary and draws Guests’ attention to key landmarks.  The music has an authentic flavor, being played on concertinas, harmonicas, and so forth–instruments that sailors would’ve kept on board and played to pass the time in the late 18
th
century.

It may seem as though the
Columbia
is gliding under the power of her sails, like the windjammers of old, but that’s a lovely illusion.  As dictated by safety and practical requirements, she’s powered by a quiet natural gas engine.  She moves along a pre-set route along an underwater guide beam, the same beam used by the
Mark Twain
.

If you’re more interested in nautical history than the view,
proceed below decks to the aptly named
Below-Decks Museum
which was installed in 1964.  The ladder clearance (that’s “staircase clearance” to landlubbers) is tight, so, especially if you’re tall, follow the painted warning and “Mind Thy Head”.

The
Below-Decks Museum
occupies the entire below-decks area and is detailed and fascinating enough to occupy your attention for the entire voyage, which generally runs 17 minutes.  If you or your children are interested in marine history, be sure to explore the entire area, as there’s something to see in every nook and cranny.

There are barrels
, chests, and bales of provisions and cargo, rows of secured cutlasses and rifles, rope coils, and a plethora of axes, saws, and other tools neatly stowed on their pegs.  There’s a labeled display of sailor’s knots for those interested in that aspect of nautical virtuosity.

If you’re wondering
about that huge barrel labeled “Scuttlebutt,” it’s where the sailors drew their water when they were thirsty.  They also took that opportunity to converse and exchange rumors, like modern workers gathered around the office water cooler or coffee machine.  Hence, the phrase “scuttlebutt” which we still use today, meaning the latest gossip.

The crew’s quarters are in the bow, the sailors
’ two tiers of bunks stacked one above the other, and a dark, cramped, dismal area it looks.  The kitchen is nearby, with its great oven and enormous pots, and beastly hot it must’ve been down there on real windjammers when the oven was lit, and very careful the cook must’ve been not to start fires.

Along the hull on both sides are the slightly larger quarters of the
Cook, Carpenter, and Bos’n (“Bos’n” being a contraction of “boatswain”, the ship’s petty officer).  Even grander, though still cramped quarters near the stern or back of the ship housed the Surgeon, the Sick Bay, the First Mate, and Chief Mate.  The superior officers have in some cases upgraded their quarters with books, illustrations, maps, and a few personal possessions, as well as luxuries like water pitchers and chamber pots.

The Captain’s quarters seem a veritable palace in comparison to the
Crew’s and Officer’s quarters.  Occupying the entire aft section below decks, the Captain’s quarters boast two reasonably comfortable looking bunks, chairs, upholstered sofas, pewter and china plates, many books and charts, and perhaps most importantly in the claustrophobic confines within the hull, a generous complement of windows to allow in the light and the sea breezes.

Sometimes a Cast Member is stationed below deck to answer Guests’ questions. 
In 2012, I consulted a Cast Member in the museum, and he confirmed that the
Sailing Ship Columbia
is a full-scale replica of the Columbia Rediviva.  “Do you mean,” I asked, truly astonished, “that a ship
this
size, with these tight quarters, went all around the world?”  The answer?  Aye!  And according to the Cast Member, the Columbia Rediviva carried a crew of at least thirty.

I immediately researched those statistics, and confirmed the CM’s information to the last detail. 
So when you visit
Disneyland
’s
Columbia
, picture thirty souls packed onto the ship, day and night, above and below deck, for a journey around the globe.  This is an attraction that truly brings history to life.

Whether you spend your voyage above or below deck (or a combination of both), before 20 minutes have passed you’ll be back at the
Frontierland Dock
and will be instructed to debark.  Take heed:  It can get crowded and competitive on deck when debarking.  Some Guests seem determined to abandon ship as quickly as if it were under pirate attack.

These impatient folks are typically annoyed by the mooring process, which can take several minutes and require
s the ship to maneuver back and forth a number of times to line up perfectly with the debarking staircases.  Keep any tiny or frail members of your party close at hand during this sometimes rambunctious and physical debarking process.  Once you’re back on terra firma, follow signs and Cast Member instructions to the posted exits.

Sadly, this attraction was the site of
one of the park’s few fatal accidents.  On December 24, 1998, an inadequately trained Cast Member incorrectly used equipment (a nylon rather than hemp rope).  The Cast Member, trying to tie off the ship while it was still in motion, attached the rope to a cleat that was not meant to be used for that purpose.  The resulting strain on the cleat tore it free and it struck and injured two Guests, one fatally.  Allegedly there were additional issues in play–a distracted captain, improper maintenance.  The incident was traumatizing for the victims, their family, the Guests who witnessed it, and the Cast Members involved.  The park made changes in materials and Cast Member training, and added more leads to prevent such an accident from happening again. 
Did You Know?
  One of the unconfirmed
Disneyland
ghost stories I found on the Internet was the tale of a burly, unimaginative Cast Member cleaning below deck late at night, when the park was closed to Guests.  Not usually prone to ghost sightings, he nonetheless reported a faint swirl of mist that resolved itself into a ghostly image of a young
Walt
.  Spooky phenomenon?  Or pure bilge water?  Only
Walt
, may he rest in peace, knows for sure. 
Did You Also Know?
  NASA’s space shuttle Columbia, which launched in 1981 and tragically broke apart in 2003, was named in honor of the Columbia Rediviva.
Night Vision:
  At night, the
Columbia
is closed to Guests but is a participant in
Fantasmic!
  The
Columbia
serves as a pirate ship on which
Peter Pan
and
Captain Hook
duel, one of
Fantasmic!
’s many stunning performances. 
FastPass:
  No.  The
Sailing Ship Columbia
is not part of the
FastPass
network.  Operating only on weekends and peak summer days or holidays, the
Columbia
alternates voyages with the
Mark Twain Riverboat
throughout the day and departs from the same riverboat landing.  The cruise lasts about 17 minutes.  The
Columbia
can hold over 300 Guests, so you shouldn’t have to wait long for a sail.  While you’re on board, waiting for the ship to set sail, there’s time to stroll the deck, stake out a viewing point, or check out the fascinating
Below-Decks Museum

Kid’s Eye View:
[It] can be freaky because they fire the cannon.  Not as fun as the
Mark Twain Riverboat
, fewer surprises.  I haven’t been in the
Below-Decks Museum
.

 

 

Frontierland Gear and Grub

 

 

Gear:

 

 

Bonanza Outfitters

 

[
FastView:
 
Frontier charm, friendly Cast Members, and
Disney
clothes.
]

 

Accessible from
Pioneer Mercantile
on one side, from
Silver Spur Supplies
on the other, or via its own street entrance,
Bonanza
Outfitters
offers a wide range of
Disney
-themed T-shirts, sweatshirts and jackets, as well as footwear, hats and jewelry.  From 1955 to 1990, this was the
Pendleton Woolen Mills
store, selling wares similar to those
Bonanza Outfitters
offers today.

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