The Doctor's Blessing (12 page)

K
atie returned with their box lunches, giving Phillip a chance to ponder his options. Some inner part of him wanted to share everything about himself with Amber. He had guarded his past so closely for so long, he wasn’t sure he could talk about it now. It existed like a bad dream in the back of his mind.

With their lunches and ice-cold bottles of soda in hand, they left the Shoofly and started back toward the clinic. Flashing a sidelong glance at her, he half hoped she would forget about her question.

She hadn’t. After taking a sip of her cola, she went right back to the subject. “What happened that made you want to become a doctor?”

He walked in silence for several yards, unable to bring himself to talk about it.

She cast a worried glance his way. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.”

He opened his mouth to say it was a personal matter he didn’t care to discuss. That wasn’t what came out. “When I was ten, my mother and her current boyfriend had a birthday party for me. I can’t remember his name. She had so many men in her life that they all run together in my head.”

Looking down, he expected to see repugnance. He saw
only sympathy in her beautiful eyes. “I’m sorry, Phillip. I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you.”

Suddenly, it was as if the floodgates of his emotions broke open. His unhappy past came pouring out. “It was so hard. A new town every few months, a new ‘Uncle’ just as often. I was always the new kid at school who didn’t fit in, who wore dirty clothes. It didn’t pay trying to make friends because I knew I’d be leaving.”

“Yet you turned out to be a responsible, caring adult. You became a physician, which is no easy task.”

“That was due in large part to my stepfather. When I was fifteen, God brought a great guy into our lives. A man who saw how sad Mom was and helped her find a better life. Michael is a devout Christian. He showed me God’s blessings in my own life. He made me realize I didn’t have to shoulder my burdens alone. I still have a ways to go in being a good Christian, but I’m trying to get there. It was Michael’s generosity that allowed me to go to medical school, although I did receive some academic scholarships.”

By this time they had reached the park. They found a picnic table in the shade of a pear tree and sat down. The park was deserted except for a few squirrels chattering as they raced from treetop to treetop. The faint breeze smelled of newly mown grass. Phillip opened his box just as Amber held out her hand and bowed her head. He grasped her hand and did the same.

She said, “We thank You, Lord, for the food that nourishes our body. Grant us Your comfort and Your grace as we work to do Your will. Amen.”

“Amen,” Phillip echoed. Slowly, he released her hand.

“What happened on your birthday?” She took a bite of her drumstick. Her gaze didn’t leave his face.

Drawing a deep breath, he said, “Mom’s boyfriend asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. She told him I was
going to be a doctor like my father planned to be. It was the first I’d heard that my dad wanted to be a doctor. I cornered her later that night before she and what’s-his-name went out to party. I asked her what kind of doctor my dad wanted to be. She hemmed and hawed, but finally told me he wanted to be a family doctor.”

“Your father must have wanted to be like his own dad. I’m sure Harold would be happy to know that.”

Phillip took a drink, then said, “You once asked me how Harold and I found each other.”

“I remember. You said it was personal. I respect that.”

“I want to tell you now. Sometimes, when I’m in my grandfather’s house, I try to put myself in his place. I try to imagine what it would be like to live alone in that small house for thirty-four years. I stare at the walls and wonder what made him give up a lucrative practice in Boston to come to Hope Springs. I wonder what makes him stay. Did he ever tell you what brought him here?”

“No, and I never asked. By the time I began working here he was already a fixture, like the clock in the town square. I didn’t even know he came from Boston. Perhaps it was the death of his only son that made him leave.”

He shrugged. “Mother rarely talked about my father although I pestered her for information about him from the time I could talk. I was certain if he had lived my life would have been different. I thought my mother would have been happy. That we would live in a house instead of rented trailers and abysmal run-down apartments.”

“It’s easy to understand that you wanted to know him.”

“That’s the easy part. The rest is weird.”

“How so?”

“My mother never showed me a picture of my dad. Yet she kept it all those years. Through all the moves and all the crummy boyfriends. When I found it, I didn’t know who he
was. I turned it over. On the back of the picture he’d written, ‘To my wife Natalie with all my love, Brendan.’ I was shocked.”

“What did she say when you asked her about it? She had to know how much you wanted to learn things about him.”

“She gave no explanation other than to say it was a personal item and for me to put it away.”

“That is weird. Perhaps it was too painful for her to look at.”

“That was always her excuse. Once I knew my dad had been in the military, I started searching his military records for some clues about what kind of man he was. That was how I found out about Harold. He was listed along with my mother as kin. My mother told me that my dad was an orphan, that he had no family.”

“Why would she do that?”

“I don’t have a clue. She’s very good at avoiding uncomfortable situations. From the moment I learned of my grandfather’s existence, I spent every free minute and every free dime I had trying to track him down. I looked online, combed through old newspaper articles and public records. It was slow going. I finally hired a private detective in Boston to do the legwork for me.”

“And that’s how you found Harold?”

“The P.I. was a good investment. Within a week, he sent me Harold’s current address and the phone number of this clinic. I can’t begin to describe the emotions going through me at that moment.”

“To finally find your father’s father must have been wonderful.”

“My fingers were cold as icicles when I dialed the number. My heart was beating so hard I thought I might stroke out.”

Every word of that first conversation remained imprinted
in Phillip’s mind. After explaining who he was and how he’d found Harold, Phillip waited for his grandfather’s reaction.

Amber said, “I imagine Harold was delighted to hear from you.”

“His reaction wasn’t exactly what I’d hoped for. Harold was hard to convince. Who could blame him? To have me pop up out of nowhere after thirty-four years must have been a shock. I told him about the military records and the P.I. I left my phone number with him, then I hung up and waited.”

“He may have sounded hesitant when you were on the phone but I saw him when he came out of his office after speaking to you. There was such joy on his face. He didn’t share his news until a few days later but I knew something big was up.”

“That’s because he hired a P.I. to check me out first.”

Her eyes widened. “Really?”

“He’s a smart man. A week after our first contact Harold called me. We began a tentative long-distance relationship. After nearly a year of e-mails and phone conversations, Harold announced he was ready to meet me. We both know how that turned out. I ran him down with my car.”

Reaching out, Amber laid a hand on his arm. “You never intended to hurt him, Phillip. It was an accident. You have to stop blaming yourself.”

Her gesture of comfort was exactly what he needed. A sense of peace settled in his bones. “You’re right. I can’t blame myself forever.”

Amber withdrew her hand. The warmth between them cooled as she concentrated on her pie. Words didn’t seem adequate but she needed to say something. “Thank you for sharing your story with me. I feel honored.”

“Thank you for listening.”

They finished their meal in silence. As they gathered their
trash and disposed of it, he glanced at his watch. “Time to get back to work.”

And time to shift back into her professional mode. If only Phillip didn’t make it so hard for her to maintain that persona.

Having him share his unhappy childhood memories with her touched her deeply. Little by little he was creeping into her heart in a way she knew would lead to heartbreak. He’d be leaving in a few weeks. She simply had to get a grip on these emotions.

If only he weren’t such a wonderful person. Sure, they disagreed about a few things, important things. She could get downright angry with him but it never lasted long. He had a way of smoothing over the rough spots and making her like him all over again.

Besides being charming, he was wonderful with patients, especially the children. He attended the same church she did. He had strong Christian beliefs. He was growing to accept and care about the Amish and their ways.

Okay, he’s an almost perfect man. My mother would fall over backward with joy if I brought him home.

So why had the Lord brought such a wonderful man into her life if he wasn’t going to stay? It was a question she couldn’t answer. The ways of the Lord were not for her understanding.

Back at the office, they went through the rest of the day together without any more blowups or exchanged confidences. A little before five o’clock, they were in the lobby getting ready to close for the night.

Phillip said, “I still have to make my rounds at the hospital in Millersburg. I should get going.”

“And I need to see Mary and her baby.”

“Let me know how they’re doing.” He held up one hand.
“Not because I don’t trust your professional expertise. Because I’d like to know how they’re getting along.”

Amber couldn’t help smiling. “I’ll call you later tonight.”

He stopped on his way to the door and glanced back. “I’ll look forward to that.”

Just then, the phone rang. Phillip waited as Wilma picked up. After exchanging a few pleasantries with the caller, she covered the mouthpiece with one hand. “It’s Harold. He’d like to speak to both of you.”

Amber exchanged a worried glance with Phillip. He said, “We’ll take it in my office. Thank you, Wilma. You can go home.”

“I always miss the good stuff,” she grumbled as she gathered her purse.

“I’ll fill you in tomorrow morning,” Amber promised.

“You’d better.” She walked out the door, leaving Amber and Phillip alone.

Amber turned to face him. “Ready to accomplish your mission?”

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he asked, “What mission?”

“Don’t play dumb. Harold needs a partner. You get to tell him.”

“I can’t believe I gave in to you.”

She gave him a playful push toward his office. “Don’t worry. I’ll be right there beside you.”

“You’d better be.”

In the office, Phillip pressed the blinking light on the phone and set it to speakerphone mode. Leaning his hip against the corner of the desk, he said, “Hello, Grandfather. How are you?”

“Better than these morons give me credit for. If I were home I’d be doing great.”

Speaking up, Amber said, “Harold, I’m sure they know what’s best for you.”

“Enough about me. How is my practice?”

“It’s busy,” Phillip said with a questioning look at her.

“And Amber is back to work as a nurse-midwife?”

“Yes,” she said quickly. “Mary Yutzi had a little girl last night. Seven pounds, three ounces and twenty inches long.”

“Wonderful. What did they name her?” He sounded truly relieved and happy.

“Anna.” Phillip answered.

Harold chuckled. “Nettie must be over the moon to finally get a granddaughter. Give Mary my congratulations.”

Amber perched on a chair by the desk and leaned toward the speaker. “I will. I’m going out to the farm tonight to check on her and Anna.”

Looking at Phillip, Amber nodded toward the phone. He closed his eyes and said, “We’ve been busy here.”

“You mean since the boycott ended.”

Phillip flinched. “Even before the boycott, I was amazed at the number of patients you see.”

Harold replied, “Of course we’re busy. There’s a shortage of rural doctors, or haven’t you heard that in Hawaii?”

“I’ve heard. I was simply wondering if you had considered taking on a partner?”

“Ha! Find me one who’ll work for peanuts, see patients without insurance and make visits to homes without electricity, and I’ll take him on. It has to be a man, though. No offense, Amber.”

She grinned. “None taken. I know Amish men won’t use female doctors.”

Phillip said, “Let me be clear. You are okay with me advertising for a new physician to work with you?”

There was a long silence on the phone. Amber finally asked, “Harold, are you still there?”

“Yes.”

“What do you think about Phillip’s suggestion?”

“So the pair of you think I can’t do the job, anymore, is that it?”

“No!” they said in unison.

Phillip closed his eyes. “You aren’t a young man anymore. These people deserve to have your knowledge and skills passed on to someone who can help them far into the future. If you had died, what would have happened to them?”

“Don’t think that hasn’t crossed my mind, but I’m not ready to hang up my stethoscope.”

“Phillip didn’t say that you were,” Amber replied, trying to be reasonable.

“All right. Go ahead and advertise. You won’t find anyone.”

Phillip winked at Amber. “Then you should do as your doctors tell you so you can get back here and get to work soon.”

“Everyone sends their love and prayers,” Amber added.

“Give them my thanks.” Harold’s tone held a pensive quality that troubled Amber. The line went dead before she could ask him what was wrong.

Phillip rubbed his jaw thoughtfully. “Do you remember the name of the resident who wanted to join this practice?”

“I still have his card somewhere.” What was it that Harold hadn’t said? Amber couldn’t get his tone out of her mind.

Springing to his feet, Phillip said, “Great. Maybe the guy is still interested in working here. I can’t believe Harold agreed. That was easy.”