The Ex File (Behind the Blue Line Series Book 1) (3 page)

Ellie traced her fingers down his face, smiling as his eyes drifted shut with a sigh. The stubble beneath her palm, the slight bump in the bridge of his nose from a long-ago break, his full lips that opened slightly beneath her touch… She wanted to absorb as much of this as she could, because it wasn’t every day that she got everything she’d wished for.

While she explored, Sean’s hand slid slowly down her side, pressing her closer to him, cuddling her ass. His touch was warm and almost reverent. She took advantage of his distraction by pushing on his shoulder until he rolled to his back, pulling her on top of him.

She sat up, astride his hips, and took a moment to look him over, his strong hands on her hips, his ridged abdomen, all the way up to the impish grin and twinkling blue eyes. “See something you like?” she asked while slowly grinding her hips against his hardness, teasing both of them.

“You are so beautiful,” he said with a deep sigh, flexing his fingertips against her hips.

She smiled in response and leaned over to trail her fingers slowly down his chest, following it with light kisses. Every once in a while, she’d look up from her descent with a smile and find an answering one on his lips as he laced his fingers behind his head to watch the show.

Ellie slowly shimmied her way down until she reached his scar. She gently traced the ragged edge of the scar thinking back to that day. The nicked kidney, the blood loss, the matching ragged hole in his back. So much had been taken from both of them that day. She pressed a kiss to his trembling skin feeling his answering groan rumble through his body.

Sean dragged her up his body until she was sprawled over him as he cradled her face and kissed her deeply. It was different than any kiss she’d had before, more intense, more meaningful, almost grateful. She felt the world spin around her as the kiss went on, but found herself on her back beneath him when they broke apart.

He came up on an elbow as he leaned over to look at her. His normally bright blue eyes were in shadows, his lips shiny from their kisses. “I never thought I would have a chance…” he trailed off as he watched the path his fingers burned as they lightly traipsed their way from her face to her neck, down her chest, stopping to feel the Morse code beat of her heart against her sternum.

Seeming to enjoy an audience, he watched her keenly while leaning over to take her nipple into his mouth for the first time. Ellie’s back bowed from the soft bedding, rising to meet his touch before melting back into the luxurious sheets. His agile tongue flicked over her sensitive flesh with an attention to detail she was sure would ruin her for anyone else. She tangled her hands in the sheets as he continued tormenting her with his devilish skills.

Between his otherwise occupied mouth and his warm hand on her stomach, he had her squirming. She tried to keep her anticipation in, but the feel of his roughened palm against her skin set all of her inner longings free to roam about the bed.

She reached up and touched his hair. The silvery strands hidden among the soft, jet black mass shimmered in the minimal light. Tucking the bangs behind his ear like she’d seen him do, she drew his eyes from his work at getting her belt undone to her face. He pouted, though his hand never stopped working, finally releasing the harness leather and starting on the button. “Problem?”

She shook her head and cupped his cheek. “Kiss me.” The words were powerful, like the last vestiges of doubt had simply incinerated from the heat between them.

Sean turned his face into her palm and lightly bit the pad at the base of her thumb, and then the inside of her wrist, her elbow, watching her reactions intently as he made his way up to her lips. When he released her hand to discard his jeans, she dragged her nails down his back, and then he settled comfortably over her. He arched into her touch before coming down to take her mouth in an ardent kiss.

Articles of clothing tumbled off the bed amid fervent touches and whispered benedictions. Protection was found, and she took her time adorning him in it, teasing and tasting until he reached for her and pulled her up next to him. There was a tangle of limbs and kisses as he moved over her. He took her wrists in one hand and pinned them to the pillow above her head as he situated himself between her legs. “Last chance to change your mind,” he murmured.

Her soft chuckle shimmied through her body as she bumped her nose with his. “I think it’s safe to assume that won’t be happening.” Ellie worked one hand free and grabbed a handful of Sean’s hair, pulling his mouth down to hers as she surged up against him.

He slid slowly into her with a groan that was equal parts agony and euphoria. It equaled her own as he withdrew and slid into her again, both of them finding a rhythm that was intense and athletic. She wrapped her legs around his waist, using the strength of her legs to drive him harder, faster, until they both found completion, his quickly on the heels of her own as he growled out her name against her neck.

Sean collapsed on top of her, stuttering breaths tripping in and out of his lungs like a bellows. Ellie was in the same state, fearing for the state of her hair, now sweaty and probably matted against the pillow. He, however, was the first to move, rolling off of her to dispose of the evidence in the bathroom before returning quickly to stretch back out on the bed.

Ellie had sat up during the brief moment he’d been gone, the reality of what had just transpired suddenly crushing her brain, though that might have still been the rum. She looked over her shoulder at him as he got comfy on the pillows behind her. He reached for her, gesturing with his chin that his shoulder was now taking customers, first come, first served.

Against her better judgment, she laid back, curling up against him, her hand across his chest, and his around her shoulders. It felt surprisingly normal and completely terrifying. They lay like that for a long time, the only sounds their breathing and the music she’d forgotten was even there.

“So,” she started, if for no other reason than to stave off the nap that was threatening. “What now?

“What do you mean, what now?” came his reply as he pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head. His affectionate snuggling was doing nothing to make this any less scary for her.

Her mind flashed briefly to the scene in
Pulp Fiction
with Ving Rhames and Bruce Willis, because her sense of terror evidently ignited her flair for the absurd. “I just…” She pulled her hand down her face in an attempt to corral a cogent thought. Alas, she was unsuccessful. “Damn.” The endorphins that had taken over her brain had looted her vocabulary first, apparently.

He hummed in agreement as his hand slid from her shoulder and down her arm to her waist. “We were pretty damn spectacular, I will say that.”

She snorted and twined her legs with his. “Agreed.”

Sean shuffled her closer as he turned to face her and to bring his other arm around to hold her, as well. “So what were you thinking as far as ‘what now’?”

Ellie stretched next to him as she thought about it, the nap idea growing more appealing by the second. Any conversation more substantial was going to have to wait until after at least three uninterrupted hours of sleep. “Beyond a nap, maybe doing that again, and breakfast, I hadn’t gotten that far.” Her exhaustion made the honest answer just fall past her lips between them.

He flashed her a quick grin before pulling her close for a deep kiss which turned into a yawn. It sealed their fates, at least for that moment. After a little bit of shuffling, they were both comfortably under the covers and had resumed their previous positions as vine and trellis, respectively. Right before they both succumbed to exhaustion, he whispered in her ear, “What is this ‘maybe’ business?”

Sean wasn’t normally a light sleeper, and had been known to sleep through more than one natural disaster in his childhood. Still, he found he couldn’t quite drift off to sleep for fear he’d wake up and find this had all been a cocktail-fueled dream. An alcohol-soaked reverie which would only serve to break his heart again.

He listened to her breathing, deep and untroubled, as she lay curled up on his shoulder, her soft black curls in a bramble tangle that fell over his arm and spread out against the shimmery silver of the pillow. The moon took her sweet time on her nightly sojourn, giving him ample time to study the wisps at her nape, the curve of her shoulder, the silken feel of her skin. He was in heaven.

This was so far beyond what he’d expected when he’d spied her sidling up to the bar at the Hall. He couldn’t have excused himself fast enough from the conversation he’d been in with a buddy in organized crime, before making his way over to her. Admittedly, he almost didn’t recognize her with her riot of curls where her ultra-short pixie used to be. He liked how it accented her spunky personality, but, he mused as he pulled one ringlet almost straight and watched it spring back, this might be a more apt analogy.

Sean couldn’t get enough of touching her, lightly trailing his finger from her shoulder and down her back, trying to absorb the softness. Ellie sighed and shivered in her sleep before settling down and snuggling against him, bringing a smile to his lips. She was perfect and everything he ever wanted, even before his ill-fated dalliance with Pia.

Pia Mastriani. If he never heard that name again, it would be too soon. A part of him knew it had been a bad idea at the time, but infatuation, and an hourglass figure, could cloud even the sharpest mind. She was beautiful, funny, smart, it was the perfect relationship on paper. The paper just didn’t include the fine print like her pettiness, insecurity, intense need for attention, and a sense of entitlement that would weigh down even the most well-heeled trust fund baby.

But Ellie had never said a word. Well, maybe she had in the beginning, but he’d written that off as her characteristic snarkiness. Ellie was more of a sexy tomboy: curly hair, dark eyes that glittered when she laughed, jeans that made her ass look like it was made for grabbing, and a rack, oh, how he loved her rack. But her brand of femininity was lifetimes away from Pia’s, which was more ‘appropriate shoes and matching handbags’. Sean had just felt like the luckiest bastard on Earth for garnering her attention.

The marriage had been short. She’d known she was marrying blue collar, and her father had given them a house as a wedding present. It was more of a half million dollar prison, with all the latest appointments, than a home, but they’d been happy for the first few months. Then he got shot.

So many things about that day still eluded his memory, and that was probably for the best, anyway. He had been on the job, wearing a vest, caught two in the chest and one off to the side just beyond the Kevlar’s reach. His mind went blank somewhere while being loaded into the ambulance, and then came back again about two days later when he fully regained consciousness. By then, Ellie was a figment, only available by memory, because her cell phone went unanswered. While he knew where she was, it didn’t take a rocket scientist to see that she did not want to be found, for reasons that escaped him. It made it harder to deal with, knowing where she was and that she didn’t want to see him, and while he would have sought an explanation under other circumstances, it wasn’t like he was in a position to go hunt her down, anyway.

Though she’d been at the wedding and been to the house a couple times, he never understood why she chose right then to go. They’d been friends for several years before his marriage, beer, pizza, and fight night friends. Bad date therapy over cheese fries and whiskey friends. She was the one thing in his life that he counted on never to go anywhere, and then she was gone.

He drove his fingers through his hair before settling in with a hand behind his head, sighing in annoyed futility. The words she’d said tonight, about leaving him so he didn’t have to make a choice between the women in his life, he’d understood them, but not what they meant. He’d have never done that, never even thought of it. He’d been married to Pia, but she was his best friend, his confidant. And while the tale she spun sounded very noble, in his mind, all that ended up happening was she had been gone when he needed her most.

Pia had started seeing Chet sometime not long before he’d gotten shot, but the relationship didn’t come to his attention until a few weeks later when he was returning from rehab and found ol’ Chet making time in the Jacuzzi. Naked and looking distinctly like a soggy polar bear. Not enough brain bleach in the world to take that image from Sean, more’s the pity. After all the lies, histrionics, and her throwing a few dishes at him for being the bastard who got himself shot and then was going to deprive her of a husband, not to mention the fact that he was never home to satisfy her needs… his mind drifted back to one of their final, face to face, conversations.

“I’m sure your father would like some grandkids,” she’d simpered while using a putty knife to repair the damage her running eyeliner had caused to her makeup.

“I’m sure my father would prefer that his grandkids were actually fathered by me,” had been his equally acidic reply. Damn, but he’d needed Ellie, missed her, just needed a hug of encouragement from her, and all he’d had was an empty space where she used to be.

Ellie’s moan in her sleep brought him back to the present, and he couldn’t help but smile as she turned over and snuggled against him. Her eyelashes brushed her tanned cheeks, her full lips still slightly swollen from his kisses. He loved the warmth of her skin against his, her softness, the lingering scent of her perfume. It soothed all the churned up emotions inside him, at least for a little while. He nuzzled into her hair and kissed her head right before he went to sleep, enjoying the rightness of his life for the first time in what felt like forever.

* * *

The ringtone Sean had set for his father-in-law was the theme for The Exorcist. He’d done it on a lark, out of spite, whatever, but it remained for the entirety of his marriage and the unfortunate aftermath, though it had been a long time since he’d given it any thought. However, it now filled the room from the comfort of his nightstand, jangling his watch onto the floor and causing Ellie to wrap the pillow around her head in her sleep. He gave a brief thought about sending it to voicemail, but knew from past experience that Art would only call him back until they spoke and decided to bite the bullet.

Sean was up and out of bed, grabbing the phone and a pair of cutoff sweatpants and heading downstairs to the living room. “Art! How you been, buddy? Long time no talk.” His lack of formality was intentional, because he had gotten to enjoy pushing the old man’s buttons during his time of incarceration, er, marriage to his offspring. The brightness coming in through the patio windows was enough to make him recoil into the stairwell and had him sitting on the bottom step.

“I take it you haven’t heard,” Arturo Mastriani opened in lieu of a greeting. He was a businessman with little time for niceties or pleasantries, or at least, that was how it had always seemed to Sean. He was a fruit and vegetable distributor, third generation heir to the company and taking it statewide. It would have been impressive if he hadn’t been such a pompous ass.

Sean ran his fingers through his hair and tugged on his earlobe. “It’s a little early, and I’m still a little drunk, so you’re going to have to be more specific.”

“Pia has finally come to her senses and returned home. I thought that would make you happy.” The old man sounded relieved and joyful at the same time. Sean could see him in his mind, adjusting his ridiculously expensive tie and picking with his cufflinks.

“Wow. Pia finally came home.” Sean rubbed his eyes before pinching the bridge of his nose. Oh, he was happy all right, if getting a diagnosis of cirrhosis could make him happy. “And what is it you expect me to do with this information?” He levered himself off the steps using the handrail and made his way into the kitchen. This was not a conversation he needed to be having without caffeine. Guinness came over and nuzzled his free hand and headed for the door, so he detoured to the back door before making a beeline for the coffeemaker.

“Did you seriously just ask me that?” Arturo sounded agitated, anxious. “You need to go to her and take her back.”

“You want me to take her back.” The very idea made his mouth go dry. The coffee couldn’t brew fast enough. He stuck his cup on the hotplate beneath the spout to hurry the process along. “I mean, I guess that makes sense. She’s come home, she’s demanding you satisfy her every whim, and apparently I’m one of those whims.”

“Sean. You know I love my daughter, and I know that you love her, too.” Art was in full negotiator mode now.

Sean sipped his coffee and began rummaging through the cabinets to see if he could make Ellie a proper breakfast or if he was going to take her out. “She’s a loveable woman, and I’m sure someone else will think so. I’m not that guy.” He even almost managed to get all that out with a straight face.

“She said she wanted to see you at the house this afternoon.” Her father was nothing if not relentless.

It was all Sean could do not to spit the coffee across the room. He would be god damned if he was going to set foot back in that house. He shut the fridge with a dejected slam. No eggs meant no breakfast. There was only one way to end this conversation quickly so he could dress and take Ellie out. “I’ll see her, but not there. She can meet me at…” he thought quickly, trying to calculate his time with Ellie versus his time with Pia, “three. In the park we used to go to. She knows where.”

“You were always such a reasonable man. I knew I could count on you.” Arturo sounded exultant, triumphant.

Sean pursed his lips as he let the dog in and sipped his coffee. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll see her later.” He tossed his phone on the dining room table after he disconnected from his former father-in-law. Rubbing the back of his neck after he drove his fingers through his hair, he stared around the living room. Guinness sat by the back door, waiting patiently, so he let him in, and grabbed his shirt before he headed upstairs to dress and take out Ellie.

He certainly didn’t expect to be practically steamrolled down the stairs by a fleeing woman heading for his front door. “Hey, El.”

She actually looked startled when he called to her from the stairwell. “I… I… I got this thing. I forgot. This morning. I gotta go.”

“Okay?” He walked over to the breakfast bar next to the front door and hung his shirt over the back of the chair as he leaned against it. She looked terrified, and more than a little sad, but was holding together like it was all she could do.

“It’s was lovely seeing you again. I’ll call you. Bye.” And then she was gone, like last night had never even happened.

Sean grabbed his shirt and sat on the bottom step of the stairway. He rubbed Guinness’s head when the tall, droopy dog joined him. “Women are nuts,” he said as he stared blankly into the living room. “Completely and utterly nuts.”

* * *

It was less the walk of shame than the sprint of the scandalous. Ellie was out the door, out of the neighborhood, and on the road southbound for ten minutes before she allowed herself to think beyond fleeing the scene of the crime. As she hit the stoplight of her intended exit, she ran both hands down her face and tried to think. Her mind kept on this rollercoaster loop of last night and the phone conversation she just overheard. Not to mention the image of him, all warm and yummy and barefoot, in a pair of low-hanging sweatpants as she damn near broke the sound barrier running out the door.

Ellie quickly put on her earpiece and dialed her phone as she made the turn onto Emerson. There was one person who could set the world right for her, Josh Graham, aka her best friend.

It rang twice before she was greeted by a distinctly unimpressed, gruff voice. “’Lo?”

Fuck
. He was sleeping. She looked at the clock on the dash and winced. It was well before a time any of her friends would find decent, but she needed backup, and she needed it now. “Joshua,” she used his full name to convey the importance of the situation, “I need to see you. Now.”

“Eleanor Rose. Do you have any idea what time it is?” he hissed, letting her know he was still in bed with whatever-his-name-is-today.

“Really? Both names?” She stared at her phone even though she was on the earpiece. The only people to call her that had been her foster parents, and even that was only when she had been in serious trouble. “It’s 9:30 on a Sunday morning. Look, kick whomever he is out of bed, I’m coming over. ETA less than ten.”

“I’m on my day off and he’s a firefighter, dammit!” He sounded desperate after she gave him the timetable. She heard shuffling and thumping in the background, as well as muffled voices.

“One whom I’m sure you can pencil back into your busy schedule.” She loved Josh, truly, but his was a revolving door of unbelievably pretty men. She’d be jealous if they weren’t all gay. Some things just couldn’t be helped. “I need your help, Josh, I wouldn’t be calling if I didn’t.”

“Fine!” In her mind, the words went with him throwing up his hands in frustration. “I’ll see you in a few.”

Josh’s house was a cute little tan two-story on a cul-du-sac with meticulous landscaping and a hot tub out back. It would have looked silly, sliding sideways into a driveway in a hybrid Ford, but she was tempted, so tempted. She parked like a normal person, however, and was out of the car and up the walkway just in time to be on the receiving end of the hairiest of hairy eyeballs from Mr. Firefighter, quite possibly the biggest man she’d ever seen. Short blond hair, t-shirt thrown around his neck and emphasizing his massive shoulders, which really went with the massive and perfectly-sculpted rest of him.