The F-Word (10 page)

buttfucker
noun

1
. a person who engages in anal copulation.

1962–68
B. Jackson
In the Life
324: Everybody was “Old Butt-Fucker” to him.
1990
A. Parfrey
Apocalypse Culture
(revised edition) 203: With all the buttfuckers and drug addics having cival rights when they have aids; this makes the other 50% of the country half a citizen; we have no
rights.
1995
New York Press
(Mar. 8) 67: Dr. Jack Morin, author of the Buttfucker’s Bible,
Anal Pleasure and Health
.
2005
Exit
(South Africa) (Feb.) 26/2 (advt.): Primrose Wanted: Active butt-fucker 18–40 GM/Bi VWE no hang-ups for 3somes with GWMs 35/45 our place.

2
. a despicable person.

1973
H. S. Thompson
Letter
(Oct. 19) in
Fear & Loathing in America
(2000) 552: How many more mesas will you have to sell to those corporate butt-fuckers at The Institute?
1999
T. Parker et al.
South Park
(film script) 137: Ay! Don’t call me fat, buttfucker.
2008
J. Strong
Drawn from Life
90: “Well, what would you know, buttfucker?” Mac said. It was one of their routines. Pete came back with, “Well, what would you know, muffdiver?” “Well, what would you know, horsedick?”

celebrity-fucker
noun

a person, typically a young woman, who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse with filmstars or other celebrities; (
broadly
) a hanger-on among celebrities. Compare
STARFUCKER
.

1968
T. Wolfe
Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test
224: “You need all the big names you can get, to get the crowd out.” “Well, that’s what you get for being celebrity fuckers.”
1969
J. Susann
Love Machine
124: Falling all over the guest star. She’s living up to her title: the Celebrity Fucker.
1970
J. Bouton
Ball Four
218: A stew [
i.e.
stewardess] can come under the heading of class stuff, or table pussy, in comparison with some of the other creatures who are camp-followers or celebrity-fuckers.
1972
R. A. Wilson
Playboy’s Book of Forbidden Words
s.v.
plaster-casters
: A celebrity-fucker (the word was coined by writer-editor John Wilcock) is a young woman who will fuck anybody as long as he’s famous.
1974
P. K. Dick
Flow My Tears, the Policeman Said
53: Do you think I slept with them because they were famous? Do you think I’m a CF, a celebrity fucker?
1986
R. Campbell
In La-La Land
232: I thought he was just a celebrity fucker, you know.
1993
R. Watson
Niagara
22: Not women on the rebound, not women punishing their husbands, not women trying to make their boyfriends jealous, not celebrity fuckers, not women seeking publicity.
1997
G. Plimpton
Truman Capote
269: She [
sc
. Lillian Hellman] was always such a celebrity fucker.
2004
New York Observer
(Nov. 24) 1: I’d hate to see it go in for more interviews, author photographs, publishing news, even the gossip—anything that cuts down on anything devoted to the review of books.… I hope it won’t go that way, but the whole culture is going that way, in a celebrity-fucker direction.

CFM
adjective
[come
f
uck
m
e]

(of an article of clothing, especially shoes) intended to invite sexual advances. Also as
noun
, a sexually provocative item of clothing. Compare
FUCK-ME
,
adjective
.

[
1972
B. Rodgers
Queens’ Vernacular
53:
Come fuck-me’s
…overly tight pants.]
1990
P. Munro
Slang U
56: All her other clothes were preppy, but she had a C.F.M. skirt on.
1998
Personal letter to editor (Aug. 26): Out west, sexy boots worn by ladies are known as CFMs.
1998
Revised: Svengali
, on Usenet newsgroup alt.tv.x-files.creative: Her legs …were nicely highlighted by the type of shoes Scully had once jokingly referred to as CFM shoes.
2001
B. Thacker
Rule No. 5—No Sex on the Bus
176: They would spend six months standing in bars with their CFM shirt on.
2002
Spectator
(May 25) 18: The bride had forsaken her patent-leather, white-and-lilac “cfm” shoes with the six-inch heels in favour of Nike “air-heels” in which she danced enthusiastically.
2005
J. Coburn
Reinventing Mona
113: The group burst into wild applause when Violet stumbled on her five-inch CFM heels and momentarily lost her balance.

charity fuck
noun

=
MERCY FUCK
.

1978
J. D. Macdonald
Empty Copper Sea
47: He described the awkward union which he terms “the charity fuck.”
1986
P. Anderson
Lords of the Earth
369: I don’t want your charity…That’s what it’s called, you know. A charity fuck.
1993
J. Varley
Steel Beach
344: If there’s a worse kind of sex than the charity fuck, I haven’t heard about it.
2001
A. Wall
School of Night
268: I sort of stumbled into her. I reckon it must have been a charity fuck, to be honest.
2005
M. Musto in
Village Voice
(Jan. 11) (Nexis): Worst Partygoer: A nebbish who cranes his head to find someone better, when you were only talking to him as a charity fuck anyway.

chicken-fucker
noun

a depraved or disgusting fellow.—usually used with
baldheaded
. Also: a man who prefers to copulate with boys. [The 1984 quotation is euphemistic.]

1953
in G. Legman
Rationale of Dirty Joke
20: Suddenly two bald-headed men enter, and the parrot says, “You two chicken-fuckers come out in the hen-house with me.”
1970
M. Mirsky
Proceedings of the Rabble
159: “Chicken fuckers!” shouted the Maine men. Taking up their own guns, they began picking off Mississippi dogs.
1976–79
H. G. Duncan & W. T. Moore
Green Side Out
276 [refers to
ca
1960]: All right ya bald-headed chicken fuckers, I want this area policed the fuck up.
1967–80
J. McAleer & B. Dickson
Unit Pride
387 [refers to Korean War]: Heave in the first shovelful…and run like a baldheaded chicken-fucker.
1984
S. Terkel
“Good War”
397 [refers to WWII]: “I’m gonna have you shot.”…“You baldheaded so-and-so, go ahead and shoot.”
2002
R. B. Parker
Widow’s Walk
xxxii. 163: “Nathan Smith was a serious chickenfucker.”…“He was drawn to young boys?” “Early adolescent when he could get them.”

clusterfuck
noun

1
. an orgy.

1965
East Village Other
(Oct.) 2/3: As soon as they legalize “pornies” I’ll be the first producer to hit the neighborhood theatres with my now in progress epic film entitled “Mongolian Cluster Fuck!”
1967–68
N. von Hoffman
We Are the People Our Parents Warned Us Against
182: Oh, those big cluster fucks! I can’t stand them.
1968
“A. D’Arcangelo”
Homosexual Handbook
115: You may see many of the people at your “do” only at other “cluster fucks,” having nothing in common with them but a taste for orgies.
1969
G. D. Bartell
Group Sex
134: One advantage of open versus closed swinging, according to most of our informants, is the possiblity of “three-on-one” or “gang bang” (sometimes called “clusterfuck”) activity.
1972
R.A. Wilson
Playboy’s Book of Forbidden Words
69:
Cluster Fuck
—Two men copulating simultaneously with the same woman.
1975
G. Legman
No Laughing Matter
754: The cheap hippie “group-grope” and “cluster-fuck.”
1977
National Lampoon
(Aug.) 50: Well, they’re usually pretty wrapped up in a cluster-fuck with the photo models.
1986
J. Ellroy
Suicide Hill
699: I’m startin’ to feel like the bottom man in a Mongolian cluster fuck.
2001
J. Ellroy
Cold Six Thousand
xxi. 115: Pete saw cartoons and FBI text. Hate and smut—a coon named Bayard Rustin—a queer cluster-fuck.

2
.
Military
. a bungled or confused undertaking or situation; mess; (
also
) a disorganized group of individuals.

1969
in B. E. Holley
Vietnam
(1993) 143: These are the screwups that the American public rarely hears about. They happen often enough over here that we have a term for them—“cluster-fuck”!
1974
New York City man, age 27: A clusterfuck was a big expression in [the N.Y. National Guard] in 1969. It meant any time people were standing around outside of a regular formation. They’d say, “What the hell is this clusterfuck?” “Break up this clusterfuck.”
1982
J. M. Del Vecchio
13th Valley
42: This place looks like a giant clusterfuck.
Ibid
. 137: We gonna get this clusterfuck up in the air?
1983
K. Miller
Lurp Dog
222 [refers to Vietnam War]: Shame to piss up a clusterfuck target like this.
1985
D. Dye
Run Between the Raindrops
42: The rest is up for grabs. This place is a cluster-fuck.
1986
J. Thacker
Finally the Pawn
135 [refers to 1970]: What you’re going to have is an A number one clusterfuck.
1986
J. C. Stinson & J. Carabatsos
Heartbreak Ridge
146: “What’s your assessment of this alert?”…“It’s a clusterfuck!…marines should be fighting, not…filling out request forms for equipment they should already have, Sir.”
1988
P. J. O’Rourke
Holidays in Hell
218: “Mongolian Cluster Fuck” is the technical term journalists use for a preplanned, wholly scripted, news-free event.
1991
D. Simon
Homicide
82: Allowing a herd of new recruits to graze through a crime scene had all the makings of what detectives and military men like to call a clusterfuck.
1999
C. Brookmyre
One Fine Day in Middle of Night
136: This whole op is from page one of the cluster-fuck recipe book.
2006
New York Magazine
(Apr. 17) 36/1: Says one bitter paparazzo: “The whole thing was a giant cluster-fuck, a total waste of time.”

3
. Originally
Military
. a bungler; idiot.

a
1987
C. Bunch & A. Cole
Reckoning for Kings
284 [refers to Vietnam War]: He’s a clusterfuck.
2006
A. Davies
Goodbye Lemon
ii. 115: That clusterfuck Musser gets sixty grand a year up and down a goddamn telephone pole. He didn’t get that job because he’s a supergenius either.

cluster-fuck
verb

1
. to participate in an orgy; (also) to gang-bang.

1971
J. F. Hunter
Gay Insider
vii. 134: In the bird sanctuary…you can cluster-fuck with relative impunity.
2002
J. Ashbless
Divine Torment
(2007) 131: I’ve tried to tone it down, to make do with the lighter stuff. But it doesn’t give me a rush the way being cluster-fucked in a latrine does.
2003
C. McCann
Dancer
243: Fucking in the rest rooms and fucking in
the baths, fist-fucking, toe-fucking, finger-fucking, cluster-fucking, not to mention rimming, a regular fuckfest.

2
.
a
. Originally
Military
. to congregate or behave in a disorganized manner.

1983
W. D. Ehrhart
Vietnam to Perkasie
162 [refers to 1967]: All those amtracs clusterfuckin’ around the CP yesterday—Charlie knew somethin’ was up.
1999
M. Foley
Have a Nice Day
xxii. 277: It was the worst Pay-Per-View match that I have ever been in, and the fans knew it.… I got that same feeling in Orlando that night as we cluster fucked to a symphony of silence, but I waited on the ring apron until the feeling went away.

b
. to victimize; to doom; (also) to make confused or disorganized.

1996
R. Marcinko & J. Weisman
Green Team
310: The schedule I’d carefully calculated was now OBE—in other words, Overtaken By Events—and we were clusterfucked.
2000
K. W. Nolan
Ripcord
429: Everybody just went in their own direction.… We became totally clusterfucked.
2001
J. L. Burke
Bitterroot
141: The shorter version is I got cluster-fucked eight ways from breakfast and that broad is living on a horse ranch bought with my money.
2001
O. West
Sharkman Six
47: Sir, this is going to get clusterfucked, we don’t play it right. If the press gets hold of this, we’re dead.
2007
J. L. Burke
Tin Roof Blowdown
v. 30: This lamebrain not only out-smarted you, he cluster-fucked you six ways from breakfast.
2007
P. F. Hamilton
Dreaming Void
180: Is it a bunch of crap, or are we all going to get cluster-fucked by the Void?