The Fashion Hound Murders (32 page)

“I know Mom won’t want to miss it,” Josie said. “Where are you going for your honeymoon?”

“We thought we’d stay home and fix up the house,” Abby said. “We’re going to live in Stan’s home. It’s paid for. We’ll need a nursery. We plan on children eventually. I told Stan he could keep his awful exercise equipment, but it’s going in the basement. I want a real living room.”

They sat in awkward silence until Stan said, “Well, that’s our news.”

“And good news it is,” Josie said. “Thank you for stopping by and telling me. You seem perfect for each other.”

Stan was the last man to enter Josie’s home for months, but she couldn’t get Dr. Ted out of her mind. She thought about his kindness, his gentle touch with frightened animals, his brown eyes. But she was resigned to living alone. Josie decided she had no choice.

One Friday night in June, Amelia was upstairs learning to cook lamb. She’d left Harry with Josie. Josie had settled in for another dreary night in front of the television. To cheer herself up, she put on cool shorts, a pretty lace top, and added a touch of lipstick. Harry was curled next to her. She was surprised by a knock on her door at seven o’clock.

She peeked out and saw Ted standing on the porch. He was trying to keep a bottle of red wine, a tray of cheese and crackers, a bouquet of roses, and a DVD from slipping out of his arms.

Josie opened the door and Ted said, “Hi, want to watch a chick movie with me? I rented
Sex and the City.
”

“You’d watch a chick movie?” Josie asked.

“For the right chick, I’d make any sacrifice.” Ted smiled. Josie didn’t.

“Uh, could I come in before I drop all this stuff on your porch? The red wine might stain if the bottle breaks.”

Josie opened the door reluctantly. Ted slipped in and said, “I know you’re still angry. But would you at least have a glass of wine with me?”

Josie brought in two glasses and a corkscrew. Ted opened the wine and began a speech he’d obviously rehearsed.

“I was wrong about Nedra,” he said. “I made a mistake. I thought we both liked animals. We did, but it wasn’t enough for a real relationship. She wasn’t the right person for me, and I thought it would be better to tell her the truth so she could find the person she deserved. Haven’t you ever felt that way about someone?”

Stan, Josie thought. She kept a stony silence.

“Josie, I am sorry. I don’t know what else to say.”

Harry jumped into Ted’s lap and nudged the vet’s hand with his striped head. “Look, Harry has forgiven me after we got off to a bad start.”

He scratched the cat’s ears. Harry closed his eyes and purred loudly. “I’m better with animals than I am with people,” Ted said. “But I’m begging you. Forgive me. Please go out with me.”

“I forgave you long ago,” Josie said. “I’d kiss you, but it would disturb the cat.”

“Harry will understand.” Ted gently transferred the cat to a couch pillow and kissed Josie.

The kiss was worth the wait.

Shopping Tips

Hounded for the Holidays:
Some dogs love to dress up in cute clothes. Others look embarrassed in anything but their own fur coat. If you have a fashion hound, the holidays are an ideal time to trot out the canine couture.

For Halloween, there are “bad to the bone” shirts and jackets, ladybug sweaters, pumpkin and dinosaur outfits. You can find them at many pet boutiques, or by prowling the Internet.

At
www.lovelonglong.com
, click through to the rhinestone I LOVE SANTA tank tops, bright red Christmas hoodies with fleece trim, Santa suits, red Christmas sweaters with matching socks, doggy boots, and angel-wing harnesses.

Dog boots and pet shoes protect cold paws on icy winter sidewalks. Pardon the pun, but there are houndstooth boots at
www.DoggieVogue.com
.

Don’t forget. For many dog clothes, you’ll need a size. The chart may ask for your pet’s body length, chest circumference, neck circumference, and leg length.

Shop and save . . . the animals:
Your local shelter usually has a gift shop featuring clothes, jewelry, and toys for humans and animals, as well as pet beds and carriers. A portion of the proceeds goes to help the animals. Pick up a fashionable dog carrier purse or a sporty stroller and help care for other rescued animals.

The Humane Society of Missouri gift shop sells Christmas and Hanukkah items. Prices may change, but when last we checked, here is what the items cost. The Howling Hound Menorah is $62. The Playful Pups Bagel Tin is $39.50. There are treetop angels of your favorite breed and angelic dog ornaments, too. Cards and gifts for year-round celebrations from Mother’s Day to Valentine’s Day are at the Humane Society of Missouri. Shop online at
www.hsmo.org
.

For a dog’s night out:
Your princess will shine in a Parisian pearl tiara ($7.99) or a rhinestone tiara barrette ($9.99). Jeweled leads start at $10.99. Fancy bows, crystal charms, and bling are at
www.DoggieVogue.com
.

Well-bred gentlemen dogs about town may prefer the black-tie collar for $18 at
hsm.petfulfillment.com
. Black tie works for best dogs at weddings, too.

Walk on the wild side:
Even animals wear animal prints, if the items are natural fibers. Funky zebra-print dresses, dog carriers, collars, and sliders are available at
www.DoggieVogue.com
. Prices range from $3.99 for safari sliders to $24.99 for cotton zebra-print dresses with red bows.

Puttin’ on the dog:
Looking for cute dog clothes, collars, and canine accessories? Save your own paws and shop online for discount and designer duds at the outrageously named Bitch New York (
www.bitchnewyork.com
). Be sure to look up your dog’s weekly horoscope. That’s free.

Where Josie shops for pet treats in Maplewood:
Customers at Airedale Antics, 7316 Manchester Road, are greeted by Harrybear and Sassybear, animal friends of Sheri and Tony Phipps. Sassy and Harry are Airedales, of course. The shop has pet treats, as well as “fine wines” for dogs and cats, including Sniff-N-Tail, Barkundy, and Meowlot from Bark Vineyards.

Tony says the wine is “a gravy with vitamins and minerals and is all natural.”

Many pet lovers have a hard time brushing their pet’s teeth. Tony suggests ProDen PlaqueOff, a ground seaweed product to put in your pet’s food.

Airedale Antics is also a good place to meet animal lovers in various breed rescue groups. For information, go to
www.airedaleantics.com
or call 314-781-PETS.

If you aren’t lucky enough to live in Maplewood:
Three Dog Bakery has shops around the world, including Canada, Hong Kong, Japan, and across the United States. Three Dog’s treats and food include “All Natural Baked Food for Dogs,” “Beagle Bagels,” and “Gift Boxers.”

Felines can enjoy that fat-cat special, lobster. Three Dog sells We Pity the Kitties treats. Three Dog treats are also available at Wal-Mart, Costco, Walgreens, and other outlets. The Three Dog Bakery, 8861 Ladue Road (314-726- 1674), is close to Alyce’s home. For a store near you, go to
www.threedog.com
.

Pet Baskets:
Is your friend thrilled to be adopting a new puppy? Delighted with her new kitten? Worried about her dachshund’s back operation? Celebrating her basset’s birthday? Commemorate these and other pet milestones with gift baskets from
www.mypetgifts.com
. Prices range from $30 to $44. There are also gifts for cats and dogs for under $20.

When the inevitable happens:
Sympathy baskets let your friends and family know you care. Three choices include Mrs. Beasley’s Sympathy Basket (
www.mrsbeasleys.com
), a Harry and David Sympathy Basket, and the Gourmet Basket for Sympathy from
1-800-flowers.com
.

Prices range from $63 to $99.

Looks like our dog might have a little Labrador in him:
or maybe some golden retriever, or oodles of poodle. Many dog owners guess at their pet’s background. A Breed DNA Identification Kit can settle the question.

Why bother? Because a dog’s DNA can govern its appearance, behavior, and health. The Helen Woodward Animal Center sells the Breed DNA Identification Kit. Swab the inside of your dog’s cheek and send the sample to the Bio-Pet Vet Lab in a prepaid envelope. Answer those vital questions for about $60. Check out
www.pawsitivelypets.org
.

Sixty-seven percent of Americans sleep with pets on their beds:
If you belong to the thirty-three percent who refuse to let a dog sprawl across your mattress, a pet bed may lure the pooch from his favorite perch. The Canine Couture Dog Spa and Boutique in Somers, New York, has unusual pet beds, including the “Furcedes” car-shaped bed.

For dogs who dream of adventure, there are Benji’s Beds. The “Top Dog jet fighter” and the “SS
Seadog
cruise ship” are designed for small- or medium-sized dogs. Your pet can sleep in oval-shaped luxury. Benji’s Beds are at select retailers or at
www.BenjiVentures.com
.

The Chihuahua Shoppe has a plush puppy bassinet with a canopy and eyelet trimming ($19.99 at
www.chihuahua-shoppe.com
).

Buy your pet a heated bed for those cold winter nights from
www.pawsitivelypets.org
. Proceeds will benefit the Helen Woodward Animal Center. Heated beds for small, medium, or large dogs range from $32 to $112. There’s also a heated cargo bed if your pup likes to ride in your SUV.

Some pets sleep soundly in furry, snuggly beds. But if the covers aren’t washable, these beds can become a problem, especially for incontinent animals. Other dogs regard pillowy beds as personal chew toys. For these dogs, Kuranda beds can be custom designed. Kuranda also has a “Donate a Bed” program. Give a Kuranda bed to the shelter of your choice and get up to thirty-five percent off the retail price. For more information, go to
www.kuranda.com
.

Charging for the Animals:
Pittsburgh
magazine said the nonprofit Animal Friends shelter has the city’s best pet boutique. Every purchase benefits homeless animals, including the shop’s eco-friendly, organic cotton dog toys. If you open an Animal Friends Visa, the organization will receive $50 plus a portion of every purchase. For information, check out
www.ThinkingOutsideTheCage.org
.

Bag it:
Dog walking is a good way to meet interesting humans. You’ve dressed your dog from nose to tail in coat, boots, and bling. But it’s hard to look glamorous when you’re holding that telltale plastic grocery bag in your manicured paw. The Chihuahua Shoppe has a heart-shaped waste bag holder that comes with a roll of twenty heart-print bags. The holder clips to a belt or a leash, so you’ll look as cute as your little dog. Check it out at
www.chihuahuashoppe.com
.

I wouldn’t send a dog out on a night like this:
That was inventor Nan Siemer’s problem. Benji, her bichon frise, refused to go outside in the rain—for four years. Finally, Nan figured out who was top dog in her family. She invented the Poop Tent, an outdoor relief station for pets. The waterproof tent keeps dogs dry in the rain and snow. Sick and injured dogs can use its shelter, as can pups like Benji who doggedly refuse to get wet.

Pop open this puppy porta-potty near your dog’s favorite spot, right before bad weather strikes. The Poop Tent retails for $59.95. For details, go to
www.PoopTent.com
.

Strut your mutt:
If your dog is a genuine original, there are clothes designed for your pet—Pure Mutt. The original Pure Mutt is Spike, “half retriever, quarter spaniel, a little bulldog, shepherd, shih tzu—even a dash of dachshund.”

“Like any good Pure Mutt, Spike remembers to give back,” this site says. Part of your purchase goes to a no-kill animal shelter. Prices start at $3.95 for a jaunty Pure Mutt dog ban dana. People apparel is about $9.95. Celebrate your dog’s unique ancestry by dressing in matching Pure Mutt T-shirts. For more information, go to
www.puremuttinc.com
.

For felines and friends:
Harry, Amelia’s cat, is much like my own brown and black tabby. My Harry is a rescue cat. While I write, he keeps me company by sleeping near my computer. He has more leg room since I switched to a flat-screen monitor.

Harry refuses to wear cat clothes. He believes his own fur is quite handsome, and it’s all natural.

Here’s Harry’s secret vice. He likes a natural high—catnip toys from
www.catshigh.us
. The brightly colored cloth toys, about the size of a business card, are stuffed with certified organic catnip. Harry turns backflips for this catnip—literally. Prices range from $2.50 to $25.

The other hairy:
Cats look so peaceful curled up on a sofa, chair, or window seat. But what they do to the furniture isn’t so pretty. Most cats shed, and their claws aren’t kind to upholstery. Removing cat hair can be a chore. Rita Scott makes handsome kitty quilts for your cat’s favorite furniture. Toss the quilts in the washing machine when it’s time to remove that hair. Prices range from $15 to $20. For kitty quilt information, mouse over to
www.catshigh.us
.

If your cats insist on a wardrobe, there are cat clothes:
Cat lovers may get a kick out of the Mouse Patrol T-shirt, made of washable cotton jersey, and other selections at
www.BaxterBoo.com
.

Calm and contemplative felines do fine with soft fabrics and Velcro closures. But Velcro won’t hold if a cat really wants to be free. One cat-loving friend bought her cats holiday costumes designed for small dogs. She found that the dog styles didn’t fit her cats. As any feline knows, cats are different from dogs.