The Forbidden Billionaire (The Sinclairs Book 2) (14 page)

“I wish I could believe that things wouldn’t have turned out any differently had I stayed and insisted on driving them.”

What person does that? What young guy
that
heartbroken was going to keep a cool head and calmly drive two people home who had betrayed him? “They wouldn’t have gone home with you. How long do you think they were involved?”

Jared released a masculine sigh. “Looking back, they may have been screwing each other for quite a while. They weren’t drunk enough that night for it to have been a first-time fling, and I heard them before I actually saw them fucking. Selena was rambling about how much she loved some of the things that Alan did to her. It wasn’t a new thing.” He paused and took a deep breath before continuing. “They started doing things together about halfway through my last year of college. I thought they were just friends, and I was trying to get the business together, so I was busy. Selena and I just kept growing more and more distant. I thought it was just because I was so busy.”

So it was Jared’s fault for that distance between them, too? He worked too much so his girlfriend found someone else to screw her?

The whole incident was beginning to make Mara pissed off and defensive for Jared’s sake. “Why didn’t she just break up with you?”

“Her family was happy we were together then. She came from a family who didn’t have much. After we met, I helped her pay for all her college fees. They were grateful. I think Selena was just waiting until she finished school to make the break,” Jared answered flatly. “She had one more year, and Alan didn’t have the funds to help her.”

Bitch!
Mara didn’t know if Selena had ever cared about Jared or if he was just convenient to pay for her education. But she sounded like she was a user. And his so-called friend? What kind of guy did the horizontal mambo with his best friend’s girlfriend, a friend who was completely funding their start-up partnership in business together? Okay . . . neither of them deserved to die because they were users, but she wished they were still alive so she could bitch slap both of them. “So this misplaced guilt caused you to go over the edge?”

His body tensed. “How the hell do you know about that?”

“Evan told me.”

“Fuck! He hasn’t mentioned that to anyone. He promised he wouldn’t. My family never even knew,” Jared growled. “Yeah, I went on a major bender. I just wanted to forget. Fuck! I just wanted to get rid of the images and sounds of the two of them together. I wanted to forget the scorn of their families and the whispers behind my damn back. I wanted to forget their funerals, and I really wanted to forget that they were gone forever because I’d done something stupid.”

“And did you forget?”

“Hell no. And I hated Evan for a while for forcing me into reality again.”

She stroked a palm over the stubble on his jaw. “I’m glad he did. What happened?”

Mara knew she was done fighting her attraction to Jared, finished trying to defend herself against getting hurt. This man had once loved and had been completely betrayed. Since then, he’d been torturing himself about what else he could have done to save the lives of the very people who had deceived him, and he’d shouldered every bit of blame. Jared might have been with a lot of women, but they were females who hadn’t cared what demons lurked inside him. She did. And if opening her heart to him completely was the only way to heal those wounds, she’d do it. She didn’t care about the risk anymore. She just cared about . . .
him
.

“I don’t remember most of those months,” Jared admitted in a hesitant, graveled voice. “Every time I woke up, I started thinking, so I got drunk again. It’s pretty much lost time for me until Evan showed up.”

Mara didn’t even have to ask how Evan had known that Jared needed him. While Jared’s eldest brother tried to act like he didn’t care about anyone or anything, he seemed to have an almost scary way of knowing what was going in his siblings’ lives. “So he sobered you up?”

“The hard way,” Jared grumbled. “He tossed my ass in the shower because he said I stunk. A cleaning staff showed up almost instantly to clean my condo, and he forced coffee and food down my throat. He got rid of every drop of alcohol in the house. I guess the main thing I remember is that he stayed, even though he badgered the hell out of me day and night.”

“Tough love,” Mara murmured.

“With Evan, I don’t think there’s any other kind,” Jared rumbled.

“How long?”

Jared shrugged. “Weeks. He took over my office and worked, but he never left me alone.”

Mara could imagine the two gruff brothers in each other’s company, snapping at each other, and caring so very much while they were doing it. “Your siblings love you, Jared.”

“They don’t even know me anymore,” he growled. “They don’t know what happened, or how naive and selfish I was.”

“Evan knows, and he still cares.” Mara could still remember Evan’s words of warning that he never wanted to see Jared suffer like he’d suffered after the deaths of his friends. “I’m not one of your siblings, but I know, and I still care.”

Jared threaded his hands through her hair and tilted her gaze down to meet his. “Do you? Can you really look at me and not see an irresponsible, selfish asshole who killed his friends?”

Mara turned her body and straddled him, letting her legs dangle off both sides of the recliner. “Yes,” she told him truthfully, holding his eyes with hers. Her heart clenched as she saw the momentary confusion and hope in his eyes. “You need to stop torturing yourself. Please. The. Accident. Was. Not. Your. Fault.” Mara put her arms around his neck and stroked the coarse hair at his nape. “I’m sorry they died. They were both way too young, and it’s sad. But you aren’t to blame.”

“You care?” he asked hesitantly. “About me? Even after everything I just told you?” He looked endearingly confused.

“I do,” she whispered softly, swallowing a huge lump in her throat. “I’m not going to try to protect myself from getting hurt anymore, and I’m never going to be less than honest about how I feel. I admire how you pulled yourself back out of the darkness and made yourself even more successful. I hurt for you because you gave up your passion and your dreams of restoring old homes because of bad memories. It kills me that you took the blame so others could keep their happy memories.” Mara was pretty certain not many people would have done what Jared had done. Honestly, it was probably the right thing to do with a mother who had lost a daughter, but she hated that he’d had to be the scapegoat. She absolutely wished Selena’s mother hadn’t been so desperate for someone to blame that she’d made Jared the villain, especially after all he’d done for her daughter.

“It was Evan who pulled me back.”

She pulled playfully at a lock of his hair. “It was
you
. Evan eventually left you alone to do what you wanted. You could have gone back to drowning in a bottle. You didn’t. It takes a lot of strength to choose to change your life. You did that, and built one of the most successful businesses in the world.” If she could do just a tiny fraction as well as Jared had done at changing his life after a tragedy, she’d be grateful.

Jared searched her face with a desperate expression before pulling her mouth down to meet his.

Mara sighed into his mouth, opening to him, returning his kiss by meeting his tongue as it pushed insistently between her lips. His kissed her breathless while she slowly slid her hands down to unbutton his shirt.

“What are you doing?” he asked as he pulled away from the fierce embrace, his voice crackling with desire.

“Seducing you. I’ve never actually done this before, so be patient with me,” she requested in a sultry voice. She could feel his rock-hard erection pushing against her ass, straining to be free. Mara wasn’t lying. She had never actually seduced a guy before. In her limited experience, they had both undressed and gotten right to it. Honestly, her sexual experience before her night with Jared had been so long ago and so unmemorable that she couldn’t even say how it had started.

Right now, all she wanted was to do something for Jared. It wouldn’t make his pain go away completely, but she hoped she could get through to him with time. There was no way she was going to let him live this way. He’d been there for her. Now she wanted to be there for him in whatever way would convince him that he was special. So damn special.

Opening his shirt after it was unbuttoned, she sighed longingly. “You’re so beautifully made, Jared.” He definitely worked at being fit, and it showed in every defined muscle on his chest and abdomen. “So smoking hot.” Leaning down, she nipped at his flat nipple and soothed it with her tongue as she slid between his legs to the floor. Palming his cock through the denim material, she smiled against his chest as he groaned, loving the way his body responded to her touch.

“I don’t have much control right now,” Jared warned her ominously as his hands threaded roughly through her hair.

Exactly!
Mara wanted to break through his control, make him understand that he didn’t need it. Not when they were together. Her finger moving slowly down his happy trail of hair leading to what she already knew was an enormous cock, she looked up at him for a moment. “If this goes as planned, in a few minutes you’ll have absolutely none.”

CHAPTER 13

Jared’s head thumped against the back of the recliner. He closed his eyes and hoped he wouldn’t wake up from what had to be a fantastic wet dream before he had a chance to fuck the woman between his thighs. Jesus, he needed her, needed her warmth surrounding him right now.

Maybe I really am having a wet dream.

The attention Mara was lavishing on his body was too intense, too surreal, too damn everything to really be happening. The way she touched him—like she really wanted nothing more than to be caressing him, like she
needed
to feel his body beneath her fingers—drove him completely insane. It was real, and it was massively addictive.

Confusion and rapture clouded his brain. How the hell could she want him this much, still be willing to even touch him after what she’d just learned? How could she
not
blame him for the deaths of his friends? How could this even be taking place?

It’s happening. It feels just like the last time, only better because she is actually trying to seduce me with a completely clear head.
It wasn’t happening because she was desperate to forget some tragedy, or because she was escaping. She actually just wanted to . . . please him, lure him into a state of desire. Really, like he needed any encouragement? His dick was always ready for Mara, even when she was doing absolutely nothing to tempt him. All she had to do was smile . . . or fucking breathe, for that matter, and his cock was rock hard.

Shuddering as her palms stroked down his chest and stomach, his breath caught as he felt her tugging insistently at the buttons of his jeans, her ferocious determination to get at his cock the hottest thing he’d ever experienced. Once she had liberated him and he felt her fingers tighten around the shaft, Jared nearly leaped out of his chair. “Bedroom. Now.” If he didn’t get inside her tight heat right now, he was going to embarrass himself right here in the recliner.

“No,” she told him fiercely. “I want to taste you. Here. Now.”

Holy. Fucking. Christ.

Control.

Control.

Control.

His eyes were wild with hunger and dread. His mantra wasn’t working, and his usual mastery over his body and emotions was quickly abandoning him.

It’s her touch.

It’s her strength to move me like no other woman ever has.

Mara was killing him with her willingness to care about him, even after she knew what a bastard he’d been years earlier. Hell, he was still a bastard, but she was
still
giving herself to him. He knew he didn’t deserve her, but he’d lost the will to resist or regain his all-important control again. Not now. Not with her.

“I won’t last,” he ground out between clenched teeth. There had never been a woman who had wanted to go down on a man his size, and it had never really mattered to him. He got off either way, but this . . . this was different. Oddly, it seemed that Mara actually
wanted
to do it, like she was dying to taste his cock. It was the most erotic thing he’d ever experienced.

“I don’t care how long you last. I just want you to enjoy it,” she answered earnestly. “You’re so big, Jared. So hard.”

Her husky reply caught him off guard, her adoration clear in her voice. It blasted him straight in the chest that Mara was accepting him exactly the way he was. Correction . . . she actually seemed to
like
him exactly as he was. Her unconditional acceptance was Jared’s undoing.

The first touch of her mouth on him brought a pleasure so sharp it was almost painful. He tried not to grasp her hair and bury himself in the moist heat between her lips, take everything she was willing to give. He fisted her hair as she left a trail of fire over the head of his cock and started sucking in the large shaft.

Control. I don’t want to hurt her when she’s giving me something no other woman ever has.

It was damn hard not to lose it when she cradled his balls in her soft fingers and stroked them gently, never pausing in her effort to take his cock into her mouth as deeply as possible. Every nerve in Jared’s body was throbbing, begging for relief. Sweat started to trickle down his face as Mara wrapped her hand around the root of him and began to stroke every inch of him with her hand and mouth.

Opening his eyes, he glanced down at the erotic sight of her between his thighs. Her eyes were closed as though she was enjoying every lick and suck, and the carnal vision induced such a visceral reaction that Jared had to close his eyes. His head fell back against the headrest of the recliner, and he gave up the fight.

He relished every stroke of her tongue, every vibration that her moans caused along his member. “Good, sweetheart. So fucking good,” he growled as she sucked harder, started moving faster. He stroked over her scalp rhythmically with his fingers, ignoring the primitive instinct to thrust his hips up. For the first time in his life, he let go completely, trusting her to bring his ecstasy to completion. “Get me off, baby,” he encouraged gutturally. “Suck me harder.”

She responded immediately, increasing her suction and her pace until Jared’s head was ready to blow . . . both of his heads, actually. His hips arched instinctively as the tension in his balls and gut tightened unbearably. “Oh, fuck, yeah,” he groaned. “I’m going to come.”

“Mmmm . . . ,” she moaned around him.

The vibration set him off, and his entire body pulsated as his powerful release pounded through every fiber of his being. “Mara!” He grasped her hair tighter than he meant to, panting as she left him sated and sweating.

Holy. Fucking. Hell.

He opened his eyes and watched as she slowly crawled back up his body, her tongue tracing the muscles in his abs and chest, before she settled carefully back into his lap.

She looked beautiful as she shot him a naughty, sultry look, her hair mussed and her lips moist. Snaking one arm around her waist and the other behind her head, he brought her talented mouth down to his, savoring the taste of himself on her lips as volatile emotions bombarded him.

I need her so damn much.

His heart swelled as she responded to him so sweetly, so automatically that it was difficult for Jared to pull his lips from hers. “You just rocked my world,” he admitted huskily, looking into her sexy, dark eyes. The words were way too mild for the way he was actually feeling, but he didn’t know what else to say.

She lowered her forehead against his and gently stroked back his hair. “Good,” she answered, sounding vulnerable and relieved. “I was afraid I wouldn’t do it the way you usually like it.”

“I don’t like it any particular way. It’s never happened before.” She’d given him something special.
She
was special. The least he could do was throw away his manly pride and tell her the truth.

Lifting her head, Mara looked at him, astonished. “But you’ve had a lot of women—”

“I’ve
fucked
a lot of women, Mara. But not a single one of them has ever wanted to go down on me.” Usually, Jared figured they just wanted to get off and collect whatever they could from him.
That
was the type of woman he usually sought out. They were safe. He knew what to expect, and he knew what he had to give in return. He had no idea exactly what to do with a woman like Mara. “And I haven’t screwed every woman I’ve ever been pictured with. A lot of them are just casual dates for charity functions or acquaintances. Contrary to what a lot of people think, I’m not a total man-whore. I’ve had my fair share of women, but I usually stay far away from women as sweet as you.”

She gave him a puzzled look. “Why? You deserve a woman who cares about you.”

Jared didn’t have an answer, and he stared at Mara darkly. It took him a moment to form a reply. “Maybe I don’t think I deserve that kind of woman.” Subconsciously, he’d probably always sought out exactly what he thought he deserved after being responsible for the deaths of two people.

Kissing him on the forehead gently, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “You do,” she muttered tenderly. “I think you need it, and you’re probably even more entitled to it than a lot of men. You’re special, Jared.”

He stood, taking her with him before lowering her to the floor and sprawling his body on top of hers. “What about you? You deserve so much more than I do. You’ve spent most of your life taking care of other people, ignoring your own needs.” Hell, Mara was the most selfless person he’d ever known, male or female.

Recovering from the change in position quickly, she smiled up at him. “You’re a lot hotter than I am,” she joked, twining her arms around his neck again. “And much too hard to resist.”

Jared swallowed hard as he came to his knees between her thighs and shrugged out of his shirt impatiently, tossing it aside. “If you think that, you aren’t seeing what I’m seeing right now.” Everything about her was impossible to ignore. She was a temptress and an angel. She was wicked and an innocent. Her dark eyes were fathomless, deep whirlpools filled with emotion, and she touched Jared in ways that terrified the hell out of him. She was a temptation beyond his ability to control, and she belonged to him.

Mine.

Evan was right, he needed to claim her completely before someone else did.

“I need you naked. Now.” Possessiveness filled him, and he needed to make her tremble with need for him until she could think of no one else
except
him.

She didn’t protest as she sat up and he made short work of her clothing, his heart thundering when she was finally sprawled out on the carpet, completely nude.

“Like I said . . . I’m not as hot as you are,” she mumbled, her entire body flushing pink as Jared looked his fill.

“Sweetheart, you have no idea how sexy you really are.” His mouth was dry as his eyes swept over her body lovingly. Her raspberry-colored nipples were hard, the peaks beckoning him. Her ivory skin was flawless, and her curvy body beckoned him to explore every portion of it. “I want to lick every inch of you with my tongue.”

Standing up, he shucked off his jeans and briefs, kicking them to the side impatiently.

“Jared, I—”

“Shhh . . .” He put a finger over her lips as he came back down on top of her. Mara looked embarrassed and beautifully aroused. “I want to taste you as much as you wanted to taste me. Probably more.”

“I haven’t—”

He pressed his finger harder against her lips. “You will. And you’ll be moaning my name while I’m doing it. I need to make you come.” He’d already known that no man had ever had his head between her thighs, and he loved knowing that he’d be the first. No doubt the only thing she’d experienced in the past was a fumbling boy who would let her give him head but offered nothing but an inept screw in return. “Lay back and enjoy it, baby. I know I will.” He couldn’t wait to touch her soft skin, lick her into orgasm. This generous, smart, gorgeous creature in front of him was now his, and he’d make damn sure she was begging for mercy before he was done. He needed her to remember nothing except him from this day forward.

No other man was going to touch her—ever!

She. Belongs. To. Me.

The words repeated in his mind over and over as he began concentrating on making her forget that anyone ever existed before him.

The first touch of his mouth on her made Mara cry out incoherently, her body so ready for Jared that any inhibitions she had were already gone. He looked at her like she was a goddess, his eyes an eddy of pure fire as he gazed at her body. No man had ever looked at her with as much longing as she saw on his face, and it increased her arousal to the point of carnal insanity.

Moaning as his tongue slid between her folds and leisurely licked her pussy from bottom to top, Mara speared her hands through his hair and urged him for more. He parted her thighs wider, taking his time like he was savoring every moment of her arousal. “More, Jared. Please.”

“Patience, sweetheart,” he groaned against her pink flesh. “It will make your orgasm so much more satisfying.”

“I’ll be satisfied now. I swear,” she told him huskily, ready to lose her mind as his tongue brushed her clit lightly and she whimpered. It wasn’t nearly enough.