The Good Mom (23 page)

“Is it a big bed,” she asked in a small voice, “or a little bed?”

He raised an eyebrow at her. “I think it's a good size.”

She snickered. He winked at her.

“The only sheets I have are for a double bed,” she said once she'd finished laughing.

He looked relieved. “That will work.”

“Great. Then we're all set.” She went to her linen closet and tossed out a set of sheets and some bath towels. He caught them deftly and loaded them into a bag.

“What else?” Aidan asked her.

“Condoms.” She looked at him. “Do we have any?”

He paused, gazing directly at her. “We soon will,” he said.

Ashley smiled.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

A
SHLEY
'
S
BONES
FELT
languid by the time they reached the cabin. During the three-hour drive into New Hampshire, she had found herself falling for Aidan all over again.

The sound of his rich, deep voice as he spoke to her. The way he looked over at her from the driver's seat. She'd never felt so cared for and protected.

And instead of the bugs and sleeping bags she'd been worried about, the cozy mountain-side setting that Aidan had chosen reminded her of a fairy tale. A traditional design, the log cabin sat alone on a clearing at the end of a winding country road. She helped Aidan bring in their bags of groceries and gear, and he gave her a short tour.

A screened-in porch overlooked the prettiest lake she had ever seen. Inside was a cozy main floor with a stone fireplace. Upstairs was a bedroom with a balcony that overlooked the lake. There was also a large bathroom with a huge antique claw-foot bathtub.

She stood there, admiring it. This was exactly where she wanted to be.

“I didn't know you were such a fan of bathtubs,” Aidan said.

“Love them.” There was a nice bottle of bubble bath on the shelf.
Sensuous rose.
She picked it up. “It's extremely rare that I get a chance to have a nice bathroom to myself.”

The smile he gave her seemed wistful. “Then you shall have your fantasy.”

But before she could crook her finger at him, he headed for the door.

“Hey, wait!” she said. “I didn't mean for you to leave!”

He turned at the doorway and gazed at her, his eyes smoky. “I'm going to start a fire downstairs. You come get me when you're ready.”

Oh, my.
She put her hand to her chest, suddenly feeling hot all over.

But it had been a long day cramped up in the car. She looked forward to stretching her legs in that gorgeous tub. Relaxing with the bubble bath. Thinking about Aidan downstairs, waiting for her...

Smiling now, she filled the tub. Poured in the fragrant bubble bath. The scent of roses and earthy musk permeated the steamy air. She easily shucked out of her jeans and cotton turtleneck sweater, dipping into the blissfully hot water.

Ah.
She sank in up to her neck, her ponytail falling over the lip of the white porcelain tub.

She closed her eyes and rubbed the sudsy bubbles all over her body. Feet. Legs. Breasts.

She hoped Aidan came in and surprised her. Her body seemed to be humming all over, waiting for him. She'd been waiting for him for weeks now, ever since she'd met him in her hair salon and had thought him the wildest, sexiest man she'd ever seen.

Sighing, she stretched out and relaxed until the water turned cooler.

No Aidan. She felt very curious as to his whereabouts.

Nibbling her lip, she hopped out of the tub and onto a plush cotton mat. She cocked her ear but heard nothing. On a whim, she dried quickly and dashed across the short hallway, into the bedroom she would share with Aidan tonight.

He'd already made the bed. Pillowcases, sheets, blankets—all were arranged. Fascinated, she reached into her suitcase and found a long silky robe she'd packed at the last minute.

The silk felt luxurious on her warm and freshly oiled skin. She wrapped the robe around her waist and chest, tied it with a barely functioning knot and clutched the long end of the belt in her fingers as she slipped downstairs on bare feet and bated breath.

Aidan—handsome, sexy, kind Aidan—was on his knees, stoking the fireplace with a length of wood. When he saw her on the stairway, swinging her robe's belt like Mae West, his mouth dropped open. He staggered to his feet, speechless. They came toward each other and met at the bottom of the stairs in front of a long velvet couch, as out of place in the rustic cabin as she'd been.

She and Aidan stood toe to toe. She gazed up at him, into his dark eyes. A hungry look was on his face.

Her breath came in shallow gasps. Her every nerve ending seemed electrified.

“I was waiting for you,” she breathed.

“You don't have to wait anymore.” He took the silk belt from her fingers and gave it a sharp tug.

Her robe fell open. Cooler air grazed her skin. His eyes devoured her as he drew her to him and they both lay on the couch.

His breathing came in a jagged gasp, too, but he kissed her anyway, as if the feel of her lips was medicine to him. He caressed his hands up and down her body. Her arms. Her back. Her bottom. His touch felt even better than the sensuous bath she'd just enjoyed. Moaning, she pressed into him, fumbling with his belt buckle. With the button to his pants. With his shirttails.

His clothes were off, and then his hard, hot body was next to hers. She
needed
him. There was a hunger in her that had been building for weeks. She'd been wary of it at first, not trusting her body's feelings for him, but now she was sure. Now she was ready for that closeness with him. She wanted Aidan, badly.

His hand dropped to the juncture between her legs, and he worked magic on her. She sighed, wriggling, crying out. The flames and the hunger in her needed to be fed. She needed him inside her, making love to her. She reached down and stroked him. So hard. But something within her—that warning voice of experience—made her screech to a halt.

She opened her eyes. “The condoms!”

“Right.” His gaze holding hers, he reached down and drew a wrapper from his jeans' pocket. Then he leaned over and kissed her gently.

“I'm sorry. I shouldn't have forgotten.”

“No,” she whispered.

“I won't ever forget again.”

She smiled into his eyes. He understood. Briefly, it occurred to her that maybe someday she would like to have another child. With Aidan. He would make such a wonderful father.

Feeling teary, she reached out and touched his slightly scratchy cheek. Without breaking their intense, soulful gaze, he put on the condom. While he kissed her, more deeply and slowly this time, he lowered himself over her and she met him, enveloping him.

It was heaven. Ashley hadn't shared such a romantic experience like this with anyone, and it felt even better than she had hoped or imagined. He made love to her with a sweet intensity that set her on fire and made her never want to burn out. Caught up in him, she cried out his name.

Afterward, they lay on the couch for a long time, embers cracking low in the fireplace. Aidan softly caressed her, whispering stories about places they would see together. Things they would do, the life they could have.

She loved this—the bubble the two of them were creating together.

“Are you as happy as I am?” she whispered.

He nodded, but rubbed his back. “I will be completely happy once we go upstairs.” He laughed self-consciously. “I've been sleeping on a cot for weeks. Honestly, my fantasy has been to get you into bed. A real bed, where we can stretch out and not get up for days.”

She sighed. “That sounds like heaven.”

“I know,” he agreed.

* * *

A
IDAN
WOKE
SOMETIME
during the night. A light was shining into their bedroom, and when he moved to the window, he saw that there was a full moon over the lake, beaming a path across the water.

He glanced back at Ashley, sleeping on her back with her auburn hair spread over her pillow. She looked so content, so satisfied. He smiled to himself. He wouldn't wake her to see the beauty outside. They had plenty of time ahead of them for that. Years, he hoped.

He'd fallen for this woman, and there was no going back. He'd put a lot of thought into her situation, and he'd decided that he wanted to make her and Brandon permanent fixtures in his life.

She'd been good for him. When he'd told her that he loved her, he'd meant it. He still believed that she felt the same way, even if she hadn't told him yet. She had more at stake than he did; she made decisions for two people, not just one. At the moment, he was rootless, but he hoped that would change. For now, he would just continue being with her as long as they could.

He went back to bed.

In fact, they spent a good part of the weekend in bed, laughing and getting to know each other more intimately. Even sleeping.

He hadn't slept so well in years. The dreams had stopped—he hadn't experienced one in weeks. The nightmares that he'd thought would haunt him forever had finally stopped.

Loving Ashley had a good deal to do with it.

* * *

O
N
S
UNDAY
, A
SHLEY
woke up and stretched, her second morning waking up with Aidan. He was on his stomach beside her, breathing deeply. She smiled to herself and reached over, rubbing his back. Sleeping with him would never grow old for her.

Lazily, he opened one eye. “Good morning, Cinderella.”

“Good morning, Prince Charming.”

“What would you like to do today?” he asked, drawing himself up on one elbow.

He made her dare to believe. Dare to believe she could have the relationship she had always longed for but never quite thought she deserved.

“I think I'd like to start with one last walk by the lake this morning,” she said.

He laughed and tickled her nose. “I'm glad to see that I've converted you to becoming a great outdoorsperson.”

“It's true you've converted me in many things.” She scooted closer to him, cuddling into his arms. “You know what I was wondering?”

“What?” he asked indulgently.

“What about your hike on the Appalachian Trail? Is that still in your plans?”

He gazed into her eyes as he smoothed her hair back. Ashley found herself holding her breath, waiting for his answer.

“I've decided it's not something I
need
to do anymore,” he said.

“Oh!”

“I'm perfectly content being with you. I've found peace right here.”

She laughed softly and laced her fingers through his. “I'm glad,” she said. She was more than glad—she was ecstatic.

An hour later, they walked farther than they had before, to a spot on high ground with a view of the whole lake. Ashley had packed a surprise lunch and put it in her backpack. She munched on an apple while she leaned against Aidan's chest. She felt his phone starting to ring in his jacket pocket.

She frowned. It was the first reminder they'd had of the outside world since they'd arrived yesterday.

“I'd love to shut the phone off,” he said. “But my condo is on the market. It might be the real estate agent calling.”

“Where are you going to live when it sells?” she asked.

He smiled at her. “Maybe that's something we can talk about over dinner.”

She felt herself blushing with pleasure.

He fumbled for his phone, which was still ringing, and then glanced at it. “I don't recognize the number. Then again, I didn't program in my real estate agent's number.”

Ashley leaned close to his ear as he answered. “Hello?” he said.

“Dr. Lowe?” Ashley heard the familiar voice on the other end. “This is Dr. Elizabeth LaValley. Do you by any chance know where my sister, Ashley, is?”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

“I
T
'
S
YOUR
SISTER
,”
Aidan mouthed to Ashley, holding his phone against his chest so that Elizabeth couldn't hear them. “But she says not to worry, Brandon is okay.”

Ashley's eyes were huge. Aidan realized with a sinking heart that their peaceful weekend was officially over.

“Ask her what's wrong!” Ashley hissed to him. “But I don't want her to know that I'm...I'm...”

“With me?” he asked quietly.

“Not because of you personally!” she said hurriedly, still whispering. “It's that I'm...I don't know. She'll think I'm indulging myself and neglecting Brandon, or something. Oh, my gosh.” She put her hands to her head. “Where's my phone? Why didn't it ring?”

She rummaged in her backpack while Aidan cleared his throat and returned to her sister.

“Sorry,” he said to Elizabeth as he held the phone to his ear. “My reception isn't that great at the moment. But yes, I'm due to see your sister this afternoon.”

He glanced at Ashley, wanting to do what was best for her. He really did love this woman. He would sacrifice his pride if he had to, let her have her secrecy from her sister for a little while longer. That couldn't last forever, but for the moment, he would cut her some slack.

“Will you ask my sister to call me, please, when you do see her?” Elizabeth asked over the phone.

“Yes,” he said to Elizabeth. “I'll let her know you're looking for her and I'll have her call you right away. May I ask why? Is it something about Brandon?”

“It is,” Elizabeth said calmly, though her voice sounded faint over the line. Their reception here really was spotty. “The school called me because I'm the alternate emergency number. It seems one of the chaperones slipped and broke his leg, so they decided to send everybody home early, because there weren't enough adults to watch the kids. This was about four hours ago, by the way.”

“So...let me repeat this to be sure I've got this straight,” he said, looking at Ashley as he spoke. She hung on his every word.

“Brandon is fine,” he repeated into the phone, for Ashley's sake. “A chaperone hurt himself, so the bus returned to the school about four hours ago. Where is Brandon now?”

“He's with his friend Douglas's grandparents,” Elizabeth said.

“Okay. He's with Douglas's grandparents. I'm, uh, writing this down.” He glanced at Ashley, who was pale. She was still hanging on his every word. “Should I have Ashley call Brandon there?”

“No, evidently he doesn't have his phone with him. The school said that Ashley has his friend's home number, though. But have her call me before she calls them. All right?”

“Okay,” Aidan said. “Will do.”

“Thank you, Aidan.” Elizabeth didn't seem angry or suspicious, and that was something. She hung up.

He glanced at Ashley. “Did you get that?”

“I can't believe this happened! I'm usually so careful!”

“It's all right,” he said calmly. “He's not in danger. You know it could have been a lot worse.”

“I did a terrible job! I wasn't thinking about him at all! It's my responsibility to have my phone on, and with me, and I didn't!”

“Ashley, it's okay. You don't have to be perfect all the time—”

“Yes, I do. When it comes to Brandon, I do.” She turned and ran without waiting for a response. It appeared she was already running back to the cabin.

He picked up the backpack she'd left, and then descended the pathway. His heart sinking, he met her in the cabin a few minutes later. She'd found her cell phone charger and was frantically plugging it into the wall. “I can't believe I didn't notice the battery was dead,” she said. “I thought I plugged it into the bathroom outlet last night.”

“Sometimes plugs don't work if the light switch isn't on.”

“I've never heard of that before! That's ridiculous!” Ashley was white-faced. “And the school explicitly told us that we wouldn't be able to reach the kids by phone during the trip. In fact, they told us to keep their phones at home, because they didn't want them damaged.”

“Brandon must have memorized my number and given it to his aunt,” Aidan realized.

He glanced at Ashley. “You can't blame yourself. You couldn't have known they'd come back early. Maybe we should just be grateful that Brandon is okay. He's safe and with his friend's grandparents.”

“Right. Of course I'm grateful.” She rushed around the cottage, picking up their things. “We have to get back to Boston, Aidan. I'm sorry.”

“I know. I'm with you.”

Once she'd finished packing, he carried her suitcase out to the trunk of the rental car.

“How about if I run down and return the key to the cabin?” he suggested. “By then your phone should be charged enough to call your sister. We'll start driving, and you can phone her on the way.”

She nodded, but she was still pale and trembling.

“He's obviously safe,” Aidan said logically. “He's being taken care of—the school would never leave him somewhere without permission. He's probably having the time of his life. Maybe he even finally got his chance to be a boarder for a little while.”

Ashley blinked at him. “I need to talk to my son.”

“Of course,” he said. “Wait here for your phone to charge. I'll be back in a few minutes.”

He took the rental car, and made the quick run to the management office in town. Then he sped back to the cabin.

He'd only been gone about twenty minutes. He hoped she was okay.

When he pulled up to the cabin, the rest of their stuff was sitting on the gravel driveway. Ashley ran outside when she saw the car pull up.

“The phone is charged enough,” she said. “We need to go, please. I'm sure I have voicemail messages. I'll listen to those first, then I'll call Lisbeth.”

“Sounds like a good plan.” He took the car keys from her and popped open the trunk, while she helped him load their suitcases and gear.

Then she climbed into the car.

“Let's go,” she said, even paler, if that were possible. “Please just drive.” Then she took out her phone and held it in her hands, intently studying the battery bar.

“If you're worried about the battery not lasting, we can stop at a store and pick up a car charger,” he suggested.

She gave a slight nod. “Yes, that would be good. Thank you. Roaming sucks up a lot of battery power.”

He wanted her to know that he was on her side. He was here to help. They were a team now.

As he drove down the gravel road, away from the cabin, he put his hand on hers, still resting on her phone. “Ash, we'll figure it out together. Please don't worry. Taking care of Brandon is our top priority. For both of us.”

“It has to be,” she said, her voice shaky. “It's my job not to screw up.”

* * *

A
SHLEY
'
S
HANDS
TREMBLED
as she logged in to her voice mail.

Ten messages in just one short afternoon. While she'd been enjoying herself, romping in bed and outside with Aidan, the unimaginable had happened. Not the chaperone's accident, though that would have been stressful enough. There was more in her sister's messages that Lisbeth hadn't passed on to Aidan.

Ashley closed her eyes, feeling sick. Not only had her son been unable to reach her, but, according to Lisbeth, he'd called her back to let her know that he had found his father's family.

“He said he found a newspaper clipping in a tin on your kitchen shelf. Do you know anything about that, Ashley?”

How
could this even be happening?
How
could he have found out?

She really did feel like throwing up. This was her worst nightmare. Nothing worse could happen now. Nothing. And Brandon was making this discovery without her there. She really was going to lose him. She felt it.

Panic filled her body. Leaving Brandon for the weekend like this, having him possibly talking to strangers claiming that they were his family, was worse than anything her mother had ever done to her and Lisbeth. Ashley was a horrible mother. Just horrible.

She'd worried about and prepared for this moment Brandon's entire life, and then, when it had come, she'd been indulging in romantic fantasies that...just did not fit with her reality.

She'd been so foolish. She'd wanted Aidan—so badly—to be a partner who made
her
happy. The person who let her be more than Brandon's mom.

But in being with Aidan, she'd slipped. In being with Aidan, she'd been irresponsible again, just as her mother had been. Being Brandon's mom was her job. Her fulltime job. He came first and she just couldn't do both together.

“Ash?” Aidan said, interrupting her thoughts. “There's a superstore on this exit. Do you want me to run inside and find that car charger?”

“Thank you,” she mumbled. “Please.” It broke her heart, because he really was good to her. She believed that he loved her. He'd said he did, and his actions proved his sincerity.

But if he did love her, he would understand. He had to know how her past had shaped her and where her priorities for the future must be.

He pulled into the parking lot. “I'll be right back.”

Five minutes later, he emerged from the store with charger in hand and gave it to Ashley as he got back behind the wheel.

“Thank you.” She plugged it in and attached it to her cell phone. “I'm going to call Brandon now,” she said, her voice unsteady. “He doesn't know I'm with you, remember.”

“Right.” But Aidan's voice sounded pained. He took his hand off hers and concentrated on driving.

She just needed to deal with Brandon's issues right now. But that was a conversation she couldn't have until she talked with her son and found out exactly what was going on.

She waited until they were on the highway again and there was relatively little road noise.

With trembling hands, she dialed the phone number that James and Maria had left her.

It rang for longer than made her comfortable.

“Hello?” This was Maria's voice. “Is this Ashley?”

“Yes,” she said, her voice shaking. “I understand that my son is with you. May I speak with him, please?”

“Certainly,” Maria said.

“Mom!” Brandon said when he came on the line. “Where are you?”

She tried to keep her voice light for him. She didn't want him to panic, too. “I'm fine—don't worry. It's just that I went for a hike, too, and I was out of range for a few hours. How are you?”

“Okay. Where are you now, Mom?”

“I'm on Route Ninety-Three, on my way back to Boston. I'll be home in two hours.” She cleared her throat. “Can you give me Douglas's grandparents' address so I can come pick you up? I left my copy at home on the table.” Ashley paused. In response she heard talking in the background.

“Brandon?” she asked.

“That was Douglas.” There was another pause, and Brandon's voice got quieter. She heard something squeak, maybe the sound of a screen door opening and closing.

“Mom?” Brandon was back. “I, um, found that clipping you had in the kitchen cabinet.”

She drew in a breath, wondering how best to handle this.

“When?” she murmured. “When did you find it?”

“Thursday night.”

She thought back. She'd been on the phone with Aidan then.

“So...can we talk about it?” she asked.

“Well, I saw the picture, and the man looked like me. And I know you wouldn't have saved it if it wasn't important. But the biggest thing is that I knew the people who were listed as being his family. Did you know I have cousins and...relatives and stuff...from my father's side?” His voice sounded shaky, but not as shaky as she felt.

How could she even answer that question?

From her peripheral vision, she noticed Aidan quietly watching her.

Exhaling slowly, she said, “No. I really didn't know that, Brandon. I'm sorry.”

“My father is dead.”

“Yes. You knew that already.” She'd never hidden that fact from him.

“This whole thing is so weird,” he said. “I've been talking with Auntie about it just now.”

“I know,” Ashley said, her heart breaking. “Auntie Lisbeth called me and left me a message, too. And, Brandon, you and I will deal with this when I get home. I was going to wait until you were older to talk to you about it then. But we'll figure it out now.”

“I'm still kinda getting used to it.” He paused. “I've been staying with them this afternoon. Douglas's grandparents.” His voice shook. “
My
grandparents, I mean.”

Her mouth dropped open. She'd had no idea. None. And then fear just sliced through Ashley's heart as she'd never felt it before.

What if Brandon preferred staying with them over her? She was having trouble breathing. Douglas's grandparents seemed so normal—more stable than she was. She could deal with it better if the family were monsters. But she'd met the grandparents—they'd been in her home! James and Maria were lovely people.

She groaned to herself—how had she missed it? The two boys did bear a resemblance. And Brandon's father had also been called Doug.

She started to shake again. This couldn't be happening...

And then a new fear occurred to her—what if they wanted custody of Brandon? What if they tried to take him away?

Their home was surely so much nicer than her dingy apartment. They could offer him so many more advantages.

Ashley closed her eyes and leaned back against her seat.

“Mom? You really didn't know about them?”