The Heart Queen (30 page)

Burke scowled. “Wha‘ will I do until then?”

“Skulk around. You seem good enough at that.” Then he hesitated. “There is a cottage not far from Braemoor. It is deserted at the moment. You can wait there for me. Just take this road past the village, then take the first path to the right.”

“Wha‘ if someone sees me?”

“That, my good fellow, is none of my concern.”

Burke glared at him.

“Midnight,” Neil said again.

“Aye, but ye better not bring anyone with ye,” Burke said in a voice that was nearly a growl.

“Ah, trust between comrades,” Neil replied. “ ‘Tis quite touching.”

“Will may trust ye. I do not,” Burke said. “Remember what I said about betrayal.” He turned his horse, heading off the road toward the hills.

Neil watched him disappear.

And wondered what in the bloody hell he was doing.

He dismissed the thought. A pony, at the moment, was more important.

Janet heard the excited scream as she mounted the stone stairway with a tray full of hot fruit pastries. She barely missed being knocked down as two little whirlwinds passed on the stairs, followed by a barking puppy and a racing kitten. Grace followed at a more sedate pace.

“What.. . ?”

She barely got the word out as Grace stopped. “The marquis ... is coming. He has two ponies with him.”

A promise kept. One, anyway.

Janet turned around and went down the steps with Grace, putting the tray on the table in the hall. Then she followed Grace through the door left open by the children.

The marquis was dismounting as Annabella and Rachel squealed with delight at the sight of two ponies, one white and one a dark bay, on a lead. Both had saddles on them.

Fearless Annabella started to run over to the white one. Rachel more cautiously approached the bay. She knew far better than Annabella never to take an animal by surprise.

Janet started to go to Annabella, but Braemoor reached her first, slowing her. He lifted her up and spoke something into her ear. Annabella grinned at him, then slowly held out her hand and touched the white pony, which shook his head then nuzzled her hand.

“He likes me.”

“
She
likes you,” Braemoor corrected her, then put her back on the ground. He remained close for a moment, though, then he turned to Grace. “I could only find two ponies, so the three of you will have to share until I find a third.” Apology was written all over his face, and Janet felt her heart melting again. The bloody man was always confusing her.

“That is perfectly all right,” Grace said in her grown-up voice. “I would rather read.”

The little mother
. She had always seen to her siblings’ needs before her own. Sometimes Janet wished she would have a temper tantrum, be a child for once.

She went over to Grace and put her arms around her.

Rachel had slowly approached the bay pony. She turned back toward Grace. “I will share her,” she offered generously.

“Him,” Braemoor said. “He’s a gelding.”

Rachel looked up and beamed at him. “Does he have a name?”

“I did not ask,” he said. “So I imagine the three of you will have to name the two of them.”

“Can I ride him . .. her ... now?” Annabella asked in a pleading voice.

Braemoor looked toward Janet for her approval. It was nice, she thought a trifle bitterly, that he was asking for approval for something. He certainly had not heeded her feelings in any other way.

She looked at Annabella and Rachel. They looked at her beseechingly.

Braemoor had won their hearts. He had the trust it had taken her months to earn. She hated the resentment she felt. And the fear.

Would he turn on them as he had turned on her eight years earlier? Once they were no longer a novelty, would he desert them with the swiftness of the stroke of a steel blade? That would be more cruel than their father’s contempt. She could not bear that. They trusted so few people. Herself and mayhap Kevin. Why then had they allowed Braemoor to steal their hearts so easily?

She went over and picked up Annabella, hugging her close. She never wanted any of them to feel the desolation, the complete emptiness of being rejected by someone whom they thought loved them. “Of course you can, sweetling,” she said and placed her in the saddle. She took the reins, however, which had been tied over the saddle.

She avoided looking at Braemoor but walked the pony around the yard. She was aware of Rachel following on the other pony.

“I want Grace to ride with me,” Rachel said from behind, and Janet knew her second daughter was trying to be generous.

Janet looked at Grace and she was backing away. “No,” she said. Janet realized then that Grace’s smile had been for her sisters’ delight. Suspicion was as alive in her eyes as it must be in Janet’s own.

Janet turned her eyes back to the path in front of her. She was not going to let her own fears spoil the joy of two little lasses who’d had so little. She would just try to stand between them and disillusionment.

A few more rounds, and she stopped to take Annabella down from the saddle.

“Doan want to get down,” Annabella protested.

“Not even if I give you a lesson tomorrow so you can ride her all by yourself?”

Annabella thrust her lip out stubbornly.

“I think the pony is very tired from her walk today,” Janet added, hoping that Annabella’s soft heart would do the rest.

“You think so?” Annabella asked, the lip receding slightly.

“Aye,” she said. “I think she needs some oats. And you can take her a carrot to make her feel at home.”

“Awright,” she said, holding out her hands to be taken down from the saddle. Janet held her for a moment, then let her down. She went running over to the marquis who had just lowered Rachel. Annabella flung her arms around his neck before he could straighten up. “Thank you. I love you.”

Janet wanted to turn her head away but before she did, she saw the incredulous expression cross his face, the softening of his stern eyes, the way his arms went around and held Annabella a moment longer than necessary. Then he let go and straightened, his gaze meeting Janet’s.

She expected to see triumph and satisfaction in them. Instead, she saw a pain so deep and so raw that she flinched.

Then he turned away.

She stood there a moment. Stricken. Had she seen what she’d thought she’d seen? Or had it simply been a trick of the sun and shadows?

“I will take them inside,” he said.

“I will pay you for the ponies as soon as Lochaene ...” She realized how meaningless the words were. Lochaene was dependent on him, on his loans. And yet...

“They are a gift, Janet,” he said. “Please do not take that pleasure from me.”

The plea was naked. Not a hint of arrogance or authority.

She turned away from him. She did not want to feel what she was feeling. She was not going to trust him again.

“Janet.”

She turned back.

“I am leaving tonight. I will not be back for several days. Tell Torquil if you need anything. The stablelads are very competent.”

“I will not need anything,” she said.

“Do not try to return to Lochaene,” he warned.

What doubt she had about him faded. “You would drag me back again?”

“Aye,” he said coolly. “I would.”

“And you wish me to promise to be a good prisoner?”

“A contented guest.”

“You can bribe my daughters,” she said. “But not me.”

“ ‘Twas no’ a bribe.”

“Was it not, my lord?”

“I wish them to be happy here. And safe.”

“I felt far safer in my own home than I do as a captive here.”

“And your children’s safety?”

“I can take care of them myself,” she said. “At least they will be protected against promises that are never kept.” Janet felt herself flush with color. She had not meant to say that. She had not wanted him to realize how much he had hurt her. How much damage he had done to her years earlier.

His eyes met hers. “That will never happen,” he said softly.

“No? And why should I believe you?”

“You probably should not,” he said. “But do believe that you are unsafe at Lochaene.”

“I do not want to be here.” It hurt too blasted much, but she could not tell him that.

A muscle twitched in his cheek. “I will try not to inflict my presence upon you more than necessary.”

She felt a twinge of regret. In protecting herself from hurt, was she being unfair? He so confused her that she did not know. She just knew she was terrified of trusting him again. She did not think she could survive another hurt that deep. “Is that why you are leaving?”

“Nay. I have a bit of unfinished business.”

Her gaze met his. “You seem to have a lot of unfinished business.” She hoped it was not as much a question as it sounded to her. His comings and goings were of no interest to her. It would be best, in truth, if he disappeared completely. Then she would not have all these ... conflicting emotions.

He looked at her for a long moment, then his gaze dropped, and he took the reins of the ponies and headed for the stable.

Janet took her daughters inside. She had promised carrots for the ponies. But first she would tempt young appetites with the apple pastries she had intended to bring them before the marquis had appeared with the ponies.

Her heat beat unsteadily. Her mind was full of angry words she had not spoken, and thoughts she tried to lock away. Why did he always create such a storm of emotions inside her? And where was he going in the middle of the night?

Could he have some secrets of his own?

Annabella skipped alongside of her and took her hand. “I love the pony,” she said.

Janet did not want to ruin what must be one of the truly wonderful moments in Annabella’s life. “Have you thought what to name her yet?”

“I think Snow White would be good,” Annabella said, looking up at her anxiously for approval.

“I think Snow White is perfect,” Janet replied.

“And we can name Rachel’s pony prince Charming,” Annabella said.

“I think we should consult Rachel and Grace about that first,” Janet said.

“But Grace doesna want a pony.”

“I think your sister was just being generous.”

Annabella considered that possibility. “She can ride Snow White anytime she wants.”

“I’m sure that will make her very happy,” Janet said.

They went inside and stopped. Samson had obviously sneaked inside while the door was open. The tray holding the pastries was on the floor, along with crumbs and jam. Delilah looked up from where she was licking the tray. Samson, his face smudged with powder and filling, looked out from under a chair, guilt all over his face as he wriggled in ingratiating supplication.

Grace went over to Samson. “Bad dog!” she said.

The puppy lay down and rolled over, his tongue lolling out pitiably.

Torquil appeared then and looked aghast as he saw the remnants of the cook’s pastries and the guilty-looking animals. Grace grabbed the puppy she’d just been chastising, clutching him to her. “I spilled the pastries,” she said.

His severe face bent a little. “So I noticed, Lady Grace.”

Grace straightened at that and tried to look as regal as possible. “I am sorry.”

“No harm done,” he said with the slightest twitch to his lips. “Cook can make a few more for afternoon tea.”

“Tea?”

Janet had not been offered tea in the two days they had been here. But mayhap that was because Braemoor had been indisposed.

“Yes, my lady. My lord asked me to serve it this afternoon. He thought the wee lassies might enjoy it.”

And obviously he had not cared whether or not she did.

“Thank you,” she said.

“I will serve it in the nursery,” he said, referring to the room near Janet’s that had been turned to that use. The lasses had been moved there, along with a bed for Colin when he was not with Janet.

So Braemoor would not be joining them. Good riddance. And yet she felt a streak of disappointment.

Janet told herself she felt that way because she just wanted to learn more of his plans. Where he was going. How long he would be gone. Then, and only then, could she make her own plans.

“Thank you,” she said. “I understand the marquis is leaving tonight.”

A flicker of surprise ran across his face. So he did not yet know. Which meant something might have prompted his sudden journey. But what? What could have happened in the past day?

And was he well enough? She kept telling herself that her only concern was to rid herself of him. And yet he’d been so exhausted upon arriving at Braemoor that she had worried about him. Should he really be taking a long trip again soon? And why in the devil did she even care?

Curse the man, but she did. She did not understand why, any more than she understood why he had gone to so much trouble to get the ponies.

But she would find out where he was going. And how long he would be gone. And what he intended for her and for Lochaene.

Braemoor came down to supper. He’d planned a good supper tonight since he did not know when he would have another. After their short exchange today, he did not expect Janet to come down for the meal.

She did.

She had apparently asked Torquil for the time he’d planned to eat, and had sworn him to silence. When Neil went down at his usual time of seven, there were two places set at the large table.

He poured himself a glass of wine and waited, remembering how much he hated to eat here alone.

Neil downed the goblet of wine even as Janet entered the room. She looked lovely, even in the black mourning dress. Her eyes were the color of the evening sky and her hair framed her face instead of being pulled back into severe braids or a knot. Her cheeks were the color of rose, not pale as he had noticed at Lochaene. A touch of some color?

He stood. “My lady.”

Her gaze met his and held it. “My lord,” she replied.

“I am pleased you are joining me.”

He went over to where she stood and pulled out the chair for her. She sat and waited until he went back to his own seat. “I wanted to thank you,” she said. “I was not very ... gracious earlier. My daughters love the ponies.”