The Independent Bride (16 page)

“You didn’t have to follow me. I was perfectly safe with Zeb.”

“Let’s stop here for a few minutes,” Bryce said, indicating a grove of cottonwood and peach leaf willow.

“What would people think if they found us alone so far from the fort?” Abby’s tone was sarcastic.

He put his hands around her waist and lifted her from the saddle before he let himself answer. “I don’t know what they might think about you, but they would know the only reason I would be out here would be to rescue a stubborn, hardheaded female from the folly of her own actions.”

Abby looked angry, but the fact that she could be angry at being called to book for such a crazy stunt only increased his frustration.

“Did you think I was just trying to scare you when I told you how dangerous it could be out here, or did you think I was trying to make you think I was the big, brave soldier who would take care of the little, helpless woman?”

Abby backed away from him. “I never thought that. I throught—”

“That’s the problem. You never thought!”

“I thought enough to realize if I didn’t deliver this herd, I’d be ruined.”

“While you were thinking of yourself, did you think about anyone else?” Bryce gripped her arms to keep her from turning her back to him. “Not all Indians live on the reservation. We have renegades who roam these plains eager to avenge themselves on any unwary white they can find. They don’t discriminate between men and women. We have white men who’d violate you, murder you, and blame it on the Indians. That would cause an uproar in the community and a demand from headquarters that I arrest the guilty parties. That would mean a fight in which many innocent men, white and Indian, would die. And all because you were too stubborn, hard-headed, and know-it-all to do what I told you.”

“I didn’t—”

“Even if civilians are liars, cheats, thieves, and worse, other civilians think their lives are precious, that their deaths must be avenged. They never think about the soldiers who may die. They’re soldiers. It’s what they’re for. Well, soldiers’ lives are precious, too. They have families and friends, hopes and dreams, and I resent it when people carelessly put their lives in jeopardy.”

Bryce was certain Abby hadn’t thought of things in this light. It took Easterners a while before they really understood they couldn’t go about with impunity as they could back home.

“Did you think of how your sister would feel if anything happened to you?” he asked. “She doesn’t have your strength, your stubborn will to survive and prosper. She’d be lost without you.”

“No.” From her expression, Bryce thought that possibility affected her more than anything else he’d said.

“Pamela would be upset, too,” he added. “She’s never paid much attention to other women at the fort, but she’s taken a tremendous liking to you. She talks about you all the time.”

“Pamela is a darling child.”

“Did you think how I would feel if I found you after some inhuman creature was done with you? Do you have any idea what it does to a man to see a person he likes reduced to such a condition?” His grip tightened on Abby, but she didn’t try to get away.

“You don’t like me.”

He didn’t know what caused him to shake her. He’d never done that to a woman before. “I do like you. Why do you think I’ve tried so hard to keep you alive?”

“You’ve done everything you could to convince me to go back to St Louis.”

“Because you’re safer there. You worry me to death. I never know what you’re doing.”

“It’s not your job to worry about me.”

“Haven’t you heard a word I’ve said? What do you think would happen if you were killed? We’d probably have newspapers back East blaring that all Indians should be eradicated. How would you feel knowing your stubbornness might start a war that would cost thousands of lives?”

He realized from her appalled look that he’d said more than he should, revealed more of himself than he wanted. He released her so abruptly she almost fell. He reached out to steady her, but she regained her balance. She looked at him, disbelief and a little fear in her gaze. He forced himself to calm down, to remember he was an experienced officer in command of a fort, not a green recruit facing his first trouble. “I’m responsible for everyone in this area—civilian, solider, and Indian,” he said. “I don’t have a choice. I have to be worried about everyone.”

He thought he could see a bit of relief in her eyes. He didn’t want her to take his words the way they’d sounded, like the declaration of some lovesick stripling. She didn’t have to know he’d wanted to take her in his arms and hold her tight to reassure himself she was safe.

Bryce didn’t know whether to lock her up for her own safety and his sanity or to admire her courage and independence. He couldn’t think of any other woman who after being in the West for barely a week would head off after rustlers armed with nothing more than a rifle and a ten-dollar-a-month striker. Zeb had at least had the sense to tell one of the soldiers what Abby meant to do and charge him to tell the colonel as soon as he returned. That might be the only reason Bryce wouldn’t have him flayed alive.

“Why would you do something like this after all I’ve told you?”

Abby massaged her wrists, glaring defiantly at him. “When will you understand this is my livelihood. I have nowhere to go if I fail. I’ve got to succeed.”

He did understand. What
she
didn’t understand was that her efforts to succeed were almost guaranteed to cause trouble. He could take away her license to run the store at the fort, but she was just stubborn enough to move to Boulder Gap and concentrate on the beef contract. It was her ownership of that contract that posed the real danger. It looked as if his best option was to make sure she was able to deliver on the contract.

“How did you know where to find the herd?” That wasn’t what he’d expected to ask when he set out after her, but the sooner he got it through his Philadelphia society-conditioned brain that there was nothing ordinary about Abby, that she wouldn’t behave the way his mother or any other society woman behaved, the better chance he’d have of keeping her alive. She looked surprised, not sure how to answer him.

“From what you and Zeb told me, I figured the trail was to the west. Going east would be too far out of their way.”

“Unless they were trying to avoid the rustlers. But Lavater is too stubborn to do anything sensible like try to avoid trouble. He’s a lot like some other people I know.”

“You don’t have to pretend you’re not talking about me. I know what you’re thinking, but I didn’t have any choice. If I don’t pay my bills on time, I’ll lose everything.”

It had to be hard for a woman who’d never had any real responsibility to suddenly find herself in such a mess. Nevertheless, he had to find some way to make her understand that there were certain dangers she couldn’t take lightly.

“You should have asked me to help, instead of taking off on your own.”

“This is my problem, not yours.”

“I’ve already explained that anything that happens out here is ultimately my problem.”

Abby gave him a steely look. “Do you have authority over civilians?”

“No.”

“Then what authority do you have to order the back to me fort?”

He didn’t have any, and he suspected she knew it. “When there’s danger to people or property, I can exercise absolute authority.”

“Since there’s no danger, I can go where I want.”

“There’s always danger to a woman alone. Do you realize if you’d ridden much farther, you wouldn’t have been able to return to the fort tonight?” Of course she hadn’t. She had no concept of the distances in the West.

“Aren’t there ranches, farms, people who live out here?”

“Yes.”

“Then I could ask for lodging with one of them for the night.”

“That’s not always possible.”

“Then I’d have slept on the ground like your men.”

“If my superiors in Washington found out about that, I could lose my command.”

“I wouldn’t want you to jeopardize your career.”

Sarcasm again, but he resisted the temptation to answer in kind. Then don’t leave the fort without talking to me first.”

Abby had always found it difficult to endure lectures. The fact that she was in the wrong made it that much harder. But to have Bryce chide her for deficiencies he’d already taken care of was the last straw. For several moments she was unable to speak without saying something that would later cover her with shame.

“I appreciate your attempts to help me learn and understand how to survive out here,” she said when she’d recovered her temper somewhat. “I’m very much aware of my ignorance, but you don’t have to rub my nose in it.”

“I just want you to understand how dangerous it can be to do anything without thinking.”

“I did think. I just didn’t know all the things to think about. I would have let Zeb take me back to the fort if I’d realized the extent of the trouble I could cause.”

Bryce looked surprised. “I thought I’d have to hog-tie you to keep you from going after that herd.”

“I don’t make a practice of ignoring danger.”

“You have since you’ve been out here. You haven’t taken a single piece of my advice.”

“That’s because you’ve just been telling me what I can’t do. Advise me how to get done what I need to do and I’ll listen to you plenty.”

He knew he shouldn’t be agreeing to help her, but he couldn’t be the one to cause her to fail. She had too much courage; she tried too hard. Maybe if he helped her, she’d soon learn enough to stay alive. There’d be no one to watch her after he was gone.

“Look, Dorrie told me you have to keep the peace to get your post back East, but if the beef doesn’t arrive, you’ll have a hard time doing that. I have to deliver the beef to have the money to resupply the store. So if you help me, you’re helping yourself as well.”

“Working together will help both of us,” Bryce said, “but if we agree to work together, it will
really
have to be together. You can’t rush off after rustlers without talking to me first.”

“Okay. We’ve lost half the herd. What do you suggest I do?”

“Give the patrol a chance to find the cattle. If my men can’t, you could see if you can find replacements.”

“And if I can’t?”

“Put all your effort into getting a full shipment the next month.”

“I can’t restock the trading post if I can’t pay off my creditors.”

“Don’t try to solve everything at once.”

“You can say that because you’ve got the government behind you. I have no one.”

“You’ve got me. Doesn’t that count for something?”

Abby was certain Bryce meant to offer his help in an official way, but the way he said it, the way he
looked
when he said it, invested his offer with a personal meaning.

“It counts for a great deal,” Abby said, “but in the end, I must learn to stand on my own two feet.”

Bryce wasn’t used to a woman who acted and thought like Abby Pierce. He knew exactly what he thought of her as a person. She was honest, forthright, industrious— he could go on enumerating her good qualities, but it added up to her being a person he could admire. He wasn’t sure but what he would have preferred a woman he could admire less and who depended on him more.

What did he think of her as a woman? Maybe more to the point, why couldn’t he
stop
thinking of her?

There was something about Abby that had gotten its claws into his gut, yet she was as different as night and day from the kind of woman who usually attracted him, from the kind he’d married, from the kind he wanted for his future wife. While he never doubted she was a lady to the core, she was much too forward, too aggressive and energetic, ever to accept, or be accepted into, the society he’d been part of since birth. She would never submit to its restrictions. She’d be ready to scream with frustration inside of a month. He could imagine her running his home efficiently and being a good mother to his children, but she’d most certainly scandalize the very women she needed to impress to help him with his career.

He didn’t know why he was thinking like this. Abby didn’t like him and he wasn’t interested in her in that way. It had to be that she had upset him so badly he wasn’t thinking straight. He wasn’t used to having a woman at the fort who didn’t do what was expected of her. He wasn’t used to one whose actions could destroy all his plans for the future. And he wasn’t used to having one who was pretty and single staying in his house. He had to get his thoughts under control. Then he had to think of a way to convince Abby to consult him before she did something crazy.

“I agree you’ve got to learn to stand on your own,” Bryce said, “but it will take you a long time to learn everything you need to know. Until then, you shouldn’t feel reluctant to ask for help and advice.”

Abby smiled at him. It was nothing personal, just amusement. “I have no problem asking for help or advice. The problem is that you and I don’t agree on when I need to ask.”

That was the crux of the situation neatly stated. “Let’s try a compromise. If it concerns the store, talk it out with Moriah. If it involves the fort, the soldiers, anything or anybody
off
the fort, talk to me.”