The Institute (2 page)

“Daniels.”

“Can you shed
some light for us on what happened here this evening?”

I don’t know
what to say. Even still fresh in my mind, the details of what just
happened are hazy. Everything went so quick, my brain hasn’t had
time to process it all. I know I need to answer carefully but I
don’t know how to say I got the boys away from the car without
arising suspicion.

“I … I didn’t
know what to do, I just knew that they needed to get away from the
fire,” I stutter.

A woman’s voice
comes from behind me, “I’m sorry, did you just say you got the boys
away from the car?” The voice belongs to one of the people from the
Institute. I realise I have to be even more cautious of what I say,
being within earshot of them. I go to answer, my mouth opens but I
don’t know what to say.

“Actually, she
didn’t do anything,” says Drew, rubbing the side his forehead. It’s
the first time I have heard him speak all day. “She just kept Jax
talking and conscious until the ambulance came. She tried to
anyway.”

The woman from
the Institute nods like she believes him, but then walks over to
the burnt out car. She looks at me and then back at the car.

I think now
would be a good time to leave. The ambulance has just left with Jax
to take him to the hospital; do they really still need me here?

“Is that all
for now? I really should be getting home, my dad is probably
worried,” I say. He won’t be, he will still be down on the farm but
they don’t know that.

“Of course Miss
Daniels, we can give you a lift if you like?” offers the tall
policeman.

“Thanks but I’m
really not far from here, I’m sure I will be fine on my own.”

If Dad happens
to see the police car he will jump to all the wrong conclusions and
I can’t deal with that, not after today.

“Are you sure?
You’ve had a pretty traumatic afternoon, I wouldn’t want you to go
into shock on your way home,” he insists.

“I can walk her
home,” Drew offers.

The officer
addresses Drew, “I don’t think that is such a great idea, you
should really get looked at by a doctor too. Actually, both of you
probably should if you were close to the car when it was on fire.
You could have smoke inhalation.”

“I feel fine,”
I respond. Although, my chest does feel quite heavy and I’ve been
trying not to cough because it feels like I have a razor blade
stuck in my throat but I am definitely sure I do not need to go to
the hospital; I wasn’t in the car when it crashed and more
importantly, I hate hospitals, needles and sick people. Just the
thought of it almost makes me want to faint.

“Me too,” Drew
says.

“At least let
us drive you both home.”

There is
something about the way the police officer is insisting, the way
his eyes are screaming at me to get in the car, that makes me say
yes to the lift even though I really don’t want to.

Both officers
help Drew and me into the car and we pull away. I notice the
Institute staff starting to tidy up the accident as we leave – why
are they cleaning up? You would think the police department would
be responsible for that. I almost ask why but I think I have drawn
enough attention to myself for one day.

I settle back
in my seat but it’s hard to get comfortable with Drew sitting next
to me. We go to school together but we have only ever had one
conversation and I’d rather forget it. I look over at him and see
that he has a gash on his forehead from the crash, maybe he
should
be going to a doctor instead of home. Even with the
messy forehead, he is intimidatingly good looking.

I remember the
day he transferred to our school a few months ago. I was looking up
at an unfamiliar face; I had fallen over walking to the train
station, on my way home from school. He was there trying to help me
up. I was so embarrassed by the whole thing, I have avoided him
ever since. The few parties Ebb and I have been to over the summer
have been cut short when I realised Drew was there. I’ve never
experienced feelings so conflicting before. I spent most of my time
at those parties hoping Drew would show up, but when he did, my
nerves would get the better of me and I’d make an excuse to leave.
I’d berate myself later for chickening out again.

I am thankful
that Drew covered for me about the accident, but I can’t help but
wonder why he did it. He is hiding the fact that I actually pulled
him out of the car and pulled Jax away from in front of it. Jax
must not have been wearing his seat belt when they crashed because
he was on the road when I found him.
Why is Drew lying to them,
protecting me?

“I feel really
dizzy,” Drew states before slumping forward. I think he has passed
out.

The officers
put their siren and lights on as they pull into my driveway.

“Sorry, we’re
going to have to take him to the hospital, are you alright from
here?”

“I’m sure I can
manage,” I reply. I’m glad they won’t be escorting me to the door
but they’re in my driveway; there’s no way Dad could miss this
spectacle.

I walk in the
front door as Dad comes through the back.

“Shilah!” he
yells out, panicked. It’s typical of him to assume it has to do
with Shilah.

“No Dad, it’s
me,” I respond, my voice filled with guilt.

I meet him in
the kitchen and his face turns from confusion to worry when he sees
what state I am in. My hair is messy and smells of smoke, my face
and clothes are covered in dirt and my hands are covered in
blood.

Dad rushes over
to me, “Are you okay? What happened?” he asks. He lifts my hand to
examine where the blood is coming from, but it’s not my blood, it’s
Jax’s.

“There was an
accident,” I say.

“Are you okay?”
he asks again.

“I’m fine,” I
reply. I don’t know what to say, I don’t know how to tell him I
screwed up.

“Allira, you’re
scaring me, what happened?”

I sigh, take a
seat at the dining table and start to explain myself. “I was
walking home from Ebbodine’s house. I didn’t see what happened, but
Drew from school crashed his car and it somehow caught alight. He
was trapped inside, another boy from school, Jax, he was thrown
from the car. I know I should have run, I know I shouldn’t have
helped.”

“You what?” Dad
reacts as badly as I expect him to. “What were you thinking,
Allira?”

“I don’t know,
I really don’t know but I couldn’t just run away, they would have
died.”

Dad is silent
for a moment. I think he is trying to decide between yelling at me
and consoling me, now that the tears have started flowing.

He manages to
remain rational and calm, “I just don’t understand how you didn’t
think about how this could go badly for you or your brother. We
don’t live in a world where selflessness is appreciated Allira, you
know that.” He sighs and starts pacing back and forth, “We’re going
to have to move again. You do know that, don’t you?” he says.

I nod. I do
know that. As the reality of what has happened sinks in and the
seriousness of the situation becomes clear, I can’t help but
mentally kick myself and think,
What the hell did I just
do?

***

“I’m sorry,” I
say to Shilah as we start packing our belongings into boxes.

Shilah doesn’t
respond. I don’t know if he is angry at me for what I have done or
feels guilty that if it wasn’t for him, we wouldn’t have to move at
all.

We pack in
silence. I can’t believe how much stuff we have accumulated in the
three years we have been here.

It takes a
while and we even skip dinner but we nearly get the whole spare
bedroom boxed up when there is a knock at the door. My heart sinks
into my stomach and I feel like I’m going to vomit.
They’ve come
for me.
I’m guessing climbing out of the window right now is
not the best escape plan, where would I go?

I hear Dad open
the door and a woman’s voice greets him. I go towards the doorway
of the spare room to try and listen to what she has to say. “Hello
Mr. Daniels, I am Drew Stanley’s mum. Can I come in for a moment?”
she asks.

“Please do,” he
replies politely.

As much as Dad
hates dealing with people, he has certainly learnt how to hide that
part of him when he needs to.

“Stay here,” I
tell Shilah.

I walk into the
kitchen where Dad has welcomed her in. She isn’t alone, Drew is
here as well. He stands with his hands in his pockets, looking at
the dirty kitchen floor. I wasn’t expecting to see him. I thought
he would still be at the hospital.

“We just wanted
to come by and thank you,” Drew’s mother says to me as she sees me
enter the room.

“Me?” I
ask.

“Of course. I
would say saving my son’s life is cause for a bit of gratitude,
don’t you think?” she replies. I cringe, maybe a long time ago,
that would’ve been true.

My dad
interjects, “Could you two kids leave us for a moment?”

This can’t
be good
, I think as I lead Drew out to the front porch.

There is a very
awkward silence between Drew and I, and I don’t know how to fill
it. His deep green eyes seem to be brighter now at night than they
were earlier in the sunlight and they’re preventing me from being
able to think clearly. I sit down on the stoop of the porch and he
sits down next to me, a little closer than expected or necessary,
but I don’t mind it. I try not to let my nerves get the better of
me like they have every time I have seen him over the summer, but I
can already feel myself beginning to fidget nervously.

“So, are you
okay?” he asks.

“Shouldn’t I be
asking you that?” I reply. I’m not the one who was in a car
accident. He shrugs and more awkward silence fills the air between
us. All I keep thinking is
Say something! Anything! Any words
will do
, but all I say is, “I’m fine.”

Drew looks down
at his feet. “I’m sorry, I don’t want to have to be the one to tell
you this but … it’s Jax …”

Even though I
knew when I was holding Jax’s hand that his chances of survival
were minimal, hearing that he’s dead will make it real. Drew
doesn’t need to say the words for me to know what he is about to
say. I don’t want to hear it, it feels like someone has punched me
– I feel winded and I’m finding it difficult to take in enough air.
Drew takes my hand in his but is silent, he can’t bring himself to
say the words.

“He didn’t make
it, did he?” I say it more of a statement than a question.

“No … he
didn’t,” he says.

Drew looks up
at me just as I well up with tears. I quickly avert my eyes and
stare down at our hands because I don’t know where else to
look.

“I should have
done more, we should have tried to help him,” I say. The guilt
inside me is making me feel nauseous.

“Allira, there
was nothing we could do. Look at me,” Drew takes his finger and
places it on my chin, gently pulling my face up to look at him. I
didn’t even realise he knew my name. “There was
nothing
we
could have done, you were amazing today and if there was something
that could have been done you would have done it. I can’t tell you
how thankful I am that you were there for me today. If you weren’t
… well I don’t want to even think about what—”

“Don’t. Don’t
think about that,” I interrupt. Our faces are so close I can feel
his warm breath on my cheek.

I can’t hold in
my emotions any longer. As the tears start flowing, Drew moves his
head away from mine and wraps his arm around my shoulders. It is
comforting to feel his touch, to have his warmth surround me. I
know he is just doing it to console me but I hope the feeling will
last forever.

Of course, this
is the moment his mother comes out and startles us both. We quickly
pull away from each other and stand up. I wipe the tears from my
face as she addresses me.

“Thank you
again Allira, you have no idea how grateful I am that you were
there,” his mother says. She puts her hand on my shoulder as she
walks past me and gives me an appreciative smile.

“So I guess I
will see you when school starts back,” Drew says before following
his mother down the path that leads to our front gate and onto the
road.

No, you
won’t
, I think to myself.

I go back
inside to find Dad sitting at the dining table.

“What did she
want?” I ask without knowing if I actually want to know the
answer.

“She knows how
much you risked saving her son. I told her you were not Defective
and—”

“I’m not!” I
interrupt.

“I know you
aren’t, and she doesn’t believe you are either.”

This surprises
me, “She doesn’t?” I ask.

“No, she
doesn’t. She wanted to come by and assure us that she won’t say
anything to anyone about you. She knows what this town can be
like.”

For a moment, I
am filled with hope. “Does that mean… do we get to stay?” I
ask.

“I don’t know
about that Allira. I don’t like that we have to trust these people
not to say anything.”

Shilah finally
comes out of hiding. “What’s happening?” he asks. “Are we still
packing, or—“

You can see by
the look on Dad’s face that he is analysing every part of the
situation and is trying to work out what to do from here.

“I guess we can
put off moving for a little while, but the first sign of trouble
and we are out of here. It will probably work out better this way.
Leaving so soon after the accident might have created more unwanted
attention.” He sighs as he sees the look of relief cross both
Shilah’s and my face. “There are only two weeks left of your summer
break, I suggest you both lay low until you have to go back to
school.” He said ‘suggest’ like we have a choice, but Shilah and I
both know it wasn’t a suggestion at all but a command. “Don’t worry
about unpacking what you have already packed tonight. It might be
handy to keep all of that stuff boxed up in case we need to leave
suddenly. How about you go to your rooms?”