The Library - The Complete Series (19 page)

Claire

"Sharpe!" I say, shocked to see him sitting by the main gate as Natalia leads me into a large, empty chamber. It's crazy, but since I've been at the Citadel, I've actually come to miss both Vanguard and Sharpe. I hurry over to him, but it's clear from the troubled look on his face that something's wrong. "What is it?" I ask, kneeling next to him. "What's happening?"

"Come back to your room when you're finished," Natalia says. "I'll leave you two alone, but you must promise me that you'll come straight back up."

"I promise," I say. As I hear her footsteps heading away, I look into Sharpe's eyes and find that he seems reluctant to look straight at me. "Okay," I say after a moment. "Out with it. What's the problem?"

"I have to go away," he says, glancing at me hesitantly. "I only ever intended to get you here, and now I'm off. This was my job and..." His voice trails off for a moment. "I should probably have just slipped away, but I needed to see you one final time. It's been so long."

"Why do you have to go?" I ask. "You're safer here."

"I doubt it," he replies. "An emissary arrived from the Forbidders earlier. He made his demands, and of course the Elder went rushing off to see what he could do. It's a fool's errand, and I don't want to witness the consequences." He takes a deep breath, and I see tears welling up in his eyes. "A long time ago, Claire, I was given a mission. It was a very simple mission, but very important. I was told that failure on my part could lead to disaster for the entire Library. The problem is, I think maybe I've got it all wrong."

"What was the mission?"

"That's part of the problem," he continues. "I can't tell you. I can't tell anyone. I swore, on pain of death. The best thing for me to do is to go, and to never come back. At least that way, I can delude myself into thinking that perhaps everything will work out for the best here, even though..." He pauses. "A time of great suffering is coming. Worse than everything that has come before. There comes a war beyond all wars, and the world is going to crack open. Not just this world, either, but all the others. All except one. I know I can't run forever, but I'm going to try. At least I'll be able to delay the inevitable."
"Why don't you come with me instead?" I ask.

"With you?" He frowns. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Home," I remind him. "That's the whole reason I came to this stupid building in the first place. You and Vanguard told me you'd help me find a way home. Remember?"

He smiles, but it's a sad, fake smile. "We did promise you that, didn't we?"

"Well?" I reply. "Doesn't it still stand? You're going to get me home, aren't you?"

"That part of my promise has, at least, been fulfilled."
"Not quite," I point out. "I'm not home yet."

"Yes," he replies. "You are. This is where you belong. There's no magic portal back to the human world, Claire. There's no route away from here. Everything that's about to happen... It has to happen with you in the middle. I wish I could explain more, but I made a promise many, many years ago, and I have to stick to my word. The Librarian himself swore me to secrecy."

"This Librarian guy," I say. "Where is he, anyway?"

"Oh, he's long gone," Sharpe says. "He said he was going, anyway. That's not the part that matters. He played his role, and then he had to leave. He took something with him, something that the Forbidders must never, ever possess. He allowed others to think of him as a coward, because he knew it was the only way he could prevent them from ever working out where he'd gone."
"Wait a minute," I say, thinking back to my encounter with Fig. "This Librarian. Are you sure he's male? He couldn't be female, could he?"

"Female? No. Definitely not. I spent plenty of time with him. He had a beard, and a deep, gravelly voice. Definitely a man. Why do you ask?"

"I met someone today," I tell him. "Up high in the Citadel. A woman who'd locked herself in a room. I guess I just thought for a moment that maybe there'd been some confusion."

"That's not the Librarian," Sharpe says. "I don't know who that woman might be. Unless..." He pauses. "No, there's no-one. And it doesn't matter. Don't let yourself get distracted, Claire. Don't go running around trying to solve mysteries that won't help. The most important thing is that you're here when the Forbidders arrive."
"They're real?" I ask.

"Of course they are. Don't you remember? You met one the other day, when you were up on the roof of the world."

"I don't remember exactly what happened," I tell him. "It's kind of vague."

He stares at me. "Vague? You looked into the eyes of one of the most fearsome creatures of the seven worlds, and your memory of the event is vague? Most people would go insane if that happened to them, Claire. They'd lose their mind and end up shivering in the corner. But you seem fine, which makes me wonder..." He looks down at the floor. "One day, you're going to remember what happened up there. It's going to come back into your mind, and you're going to remember everything. And when that day comes, you're going to have to stay strong, because I'm pretty certain that the Forbidders are going to come back at you. They kill almost everyone they encounter. If they let you live, it's because they think there's something they can gain from you."

I take a deep breath. There's something unnerving about Sharpe right now; he seems less carefree than usual, as if something dark is on his mind. "You know about them, don't you?" I say eventually. "Everyone's guessing what the Forbidders are, and what they really want, but you know something you're not telling anyone. That's right, isn't it?"

He sighs. "If I know something, it's only because I was here when it all began. It was an accident, really. I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, but I saw the very first Forbidder, and I knew immediately that he'd be trouble. I tried to put it out of my mind; I told myself that it'd be centuries before anything came of what happened that day. But centuries passed, and eventually the war started. I fooled myself into believing that it was just a coincidence. Eventually, though, I had to accept that the moment had come, and that's when I came to find you."

"Me? What have I got to do with all of this?"

"The Forbidders are looking for an old book, Claire. A very, very old book. They can't find it. No-one can find it, not at the moment. That's because it's been hidden away."

I wait for him to continue. "Still," I say eventually, "I don't see where I fit into everything. I don't know where the book is." I pause for a moment. "Do I?"

"Tell me what an old book looks like, Claire," he continues. "One that's been around for hundreds and hundreds of years. One that's been used, and read. Described it to me."

"I suppose it's... old-looking."
"Go on."

"The pages are a little worn and tatty." I reach down and scratch the eczema on my wrist. "Some of them might even be missing, like gaps in the story. Probably really important pages, like the first one or the last, something like that."

"Go on."

I think about it for a moment. "The spine would be damaged," I say finally. "Maybe someone would've taped it up to make it stronger, so it wouldn't fall apart."

"How's your back doing these days?" he asks. "Is it still hurting after all the walking we did through the Library?"

"It's fine," I say, shrugging. "I don't know why you think I know about this book, though. I mean..." I stare at him. "Was it in my house?" I ask eventually. "We had a bunch of old books. They looked pretty gnarled up. I think my Dad was going to throw them out eventually, but... Is that where this book was hidden? In one of those old boxes?"

"Not quite," he replies.

"Then what?"

"What would be the absolute best way to hide a book?" he asks. "You'd change it. You'd make it so it didn't even look like a book anymore, although some things would inevitably stay the same." He pauses for a moment. "I wasn't in your home by accident, Claire. I was sent to fetch something; I was sent to retrieve the first ever book, after it had been hidden there a long, long time ago. And I found it." He smiles. "I found you."

I stare at him. "I'm not a book, Sharpe."

"Yes," he replies. "You are. Or you were. A long time ago, before the Librarian had to hide you. He knew the Forbidders would destroy all seven worlds in their attempt to track you down, so he changed you and then he ran off with you. He knew that even once you were in human form, they'd still try to find you, so he went and hid you in a place where he thought you'd blend in perfectly. He hid you among a load of other humans. But he knew that one day, you'd have to come back and face the Forbidders, so he told one person the truth about where you were. He didn't tell any of the Elders, because he knew they'd be killed, and he didn't tell a warrior, because he knew they'd be too dumb to get the job done properly. Instead, he told someone insignificant. He told someone who'd be able to keep low and stay out of trouble; someone no-one would ever think could have been entrusted with something important. He told me."

I pause for a moment. "Bullshit," I say eventually.

"It's all true," he says. "The problem is, he didn't tell me what to do next. He just told me that when the right day came, I had to come and fetch you, and bring you back to the Citadel. I assumed the next step would be obvious, but so far it's as if we're supposed to just sit here and wait to die. The Forbidders are massing, and soon they'll be ready to tear this place down. I really don't see how it helps to have you here. I should have ignored what he told me to do; I should have let you stay in the human world. At least you were happy there, right? Well, I don't think you're going to be happy here. Not for much longer. Not when the Forbidders finally work out who, and what, you are."

"I'm not a book," I say firmly. "I'm a person. I have a memory. I have a family. Don't you think my mother would have noticed if she'd given birth to a book?"

"Your mother gave birth to a baby," he continues. "A little girl named Claire. She was beautiful, but she was sick. Your parents prayed every night by her crib, hoping she'd pull through."

"And I did," I tell him. "They told me this story a hundred times. They prayed, and one day I was just... better. It was like a miracle."
"Claire died," Sharpe replies. "One night, while your parents were sleeping, their baby died. She had an illness that meant her lungs weren't developing properly. But when she died, I was there, and I switched you. The next day, they found you in the crib, and you seemed so healthy. They never realized there'd been a switch. The only person who knew was your uncle."

"My uncle?" I feel a shiver run through my body. As crazy as Sharpe's claims sound, I can't shake the feeling that maybe there's an element of truth to what he's saying. "My uncle was a librarian," I say. "He was a..."

"He knew he had to stay close to you," Sharpe says, "so he took the body of your father's brother. He kept an eye on you, but eventually the world of the Library caught up with him. I don't know for certain, but it's my strong belief that the Forbidders located him and sent a gang of Squashers to kill him."

"Squashers?"

"Nasty little things. They like squashing people. As I understand it, your uncle was killed when some rolling shelves squashed him. Very neat, and quite appropriate in some ways. When I heard the news, I knew that I had to act first; I knew it was time, and that the Forbidders would soon be onto you."

I shake my head. "None of this is true," I say eventually. "I was right originally, wasn't I? When I thought I was in a coma? I was right. This is insane. Look at me! I'm not a book!"

"You know it's true," he replies. "Deep down, you can sense that everything I'm telling you is true. I don't know if you'll start to remember the old days. Probably not. But you can't dismiss what I'm saying, because there's a tiny part of you that can tell it's all completely true." He stands up and holds out a hand for me to shake. "And now it's time for me to go. I've done my job, and there's no need for me to be here any longer. I promised the Librarian that I'd get you to this point, and now it's up to other people to get you the rest of the way."

"No way," I say. "Come on, you have to stay."

"No. I was given very strict instructions to leave you alone once we'd reached this point. The Librarian obviously had a plan, although I've got no idea what that might have been. He was kind of manic toward the end of our time together. I think he was panicking about the Forbidders, because he knew he'd under-estimated them at first. But he seemed to have put all the pieces in place, so you've probably got a chance. Not a good chance, but a chance. And just as he told me I had to find you, he also told me it was important for me to leave you again. I've learned the hard way over the years that it's best to follow the Librarian's orders precisely, so..." He smiles. "Besides, I've got things to do. Can't hang around all day, looking after the likes of you. Vanguard's got you covered."

"Still," I say, "I'd..." I take a deep breath. I want to tell Sharpe that he's talking nonsense; I want to tell him that he's deluded if he thinks I could be a book, and that all this talk of people being hidden and then brought back to the Library is part of some fevered dream he must have been having. There's something deep down, though, that keeps nagging at me, as if some long-dormant memory is fluttering to life. "I... Will you ever come back?"