The Light of the World (5 page)

My head is pounding and my mouth is dry. I try
to sit up but I'm weak. The room spins and in the movement I see
something. A man is sitting in a chair watching me. It's not Wyatt
and no matter how hard I try to stay awake and focus, I can't. He
watches me in silence. Like he is debating something.

xxxx

I wake the second time in a puddle of sweat.
Something is on me, weighing me down. I struggle to get it off.
When I move, it moves with me and ends up covering me more. Then it
moans and I almost leap from the bed.

"Rayne?" Wyatt mutters into my back. I remain
frozen and try to gather my wits. My brain struggles to remember
the last things I'd done. My blue shorts wedgie outfit is on the
floor beside me. Wide-eyed I lift the covers expecting to see my
naked body. I have a bandeau and my granny underwear on. I
wince.

"Rayne, you awake?"

I turn over to see him. He looks horrified, "How
are you feeling?"

I frown, "Fine, why?"

He laughs, "Your makeup is all the way to your
cheekbones."

I catch a glimpse of his boxers and avert my
eyes, "How long have I been here?" I'm glad he never slept in the
sheets with me.

He stretches, "Two days. You slept mostly. You
had a high fever and threw up a lot. I think you had the flu."

"You never thought, maybe you should take me to
a doctor?"

He shakes his head, "No, your friends came and
said for sure you were just sick. They said you'd been coming down
with it for a few days. I phoned the nurse hotline. They said sleep
and fluids. Apparently it's going around campus."

I move my head and notice I feel better.
Amazingly better. "I'm starving."

He leans in and kisses my shoulder, "Good. Me
too. I have hardly eaten. Lucky I keep rations in here."

I'm not comfortable with the shoulder kiss.

"You stayed the whole time?"

He looks wounded, "Of course. I wouldn’t have
left you alone in here." He grins and his face looks cocky, "Not
wearing what you're wearing."

My eyes narrow. He laughs.

"Who was the man watching me from the arm
chair?" I feel a chill when I see the chair and recall him.

"What man?"

I point to the chair across the huge room, "The
man who was in that chair. It was dark and he was sitting there. He
had his legs crossed and he looked annoyed. Older with a sweater
on."

"There was no man. No one has come here except
Mona and Michelle. You must have been dreaming."

I let it go, but I know I wasn’t dreaming. The
man was real. He was creepy. His eyes looked like mine. They were
gray and I swear a light came out of them.

He pulls me into him and kisses my neck. I feel
frozen and not caught up in the instant relationship we seem to
have. The sparks start where he touches me. My stomach hurts. I
pull away and wrap myself tighter in the blankets.

"You okay?"

I look back at him and shake my head, "No. I
know I owe you for taking care of me, but I don’t want to owe that.
This. Whatever this is."

He frowns, "You're kind of a bitch, you know
that? I'm being nice and trying to help and you act like I've got a
hidden agenda. I'm not doing it to get in your granny panties." He
smirks again.

I cover my face, "Oh my god. I need to go home.
I need to borrow some clothes."

He hugs me and kisses the top of my head, "You
smell. You should shower first."

I shake my head, "I'm not showering here. This
is a den of sin. I can sense the virgins who have come here, only
to have their innocence stolen. I don’t even want to think about
this bed and the things you’ve done in here. You guys probably have
Wiserhood meetings in here."

He laughs, "You're weird."

"You're weird. And in a frat. Which means you're
slutty, probably."

He nods toward the bathroom, "And she's bitchy
again. Take that shower." He leans in, "You smell. It's almost
vomit mixed with something like honey or beeswax candles maybe.
Your breath is bad. Use my toothbrush."

I look horrified, "What? Eww. No. Dude. Never
share toothbrushes. You can get plaque bacteria from other people
and mess up the Ph in your mouth."

"Kissing can do it too."

I blush. I remember the kiss. I remember him
holding me and his lips pressed against mine. I remember his hands
on my bare skin and his tongue in my mouth. I remember liking it.
All of it.

He pushes my hair back from my eyes. "I have a
shower in my room. It’s the suite. Only the seniors get it. Go jump
in and I'll put some clothes in the bathroom."

I nod at the wall and point, "Turn around."

He laughs, "I saw all there was to see when I
was taking the vomit covered clothes off of you."

"I wasn’t aware of it then. Now I am. Turn
around."

"You always wear granny panties?"

I snarl, "Yes. Turn around."

He turns around, "You need to go underwear
shopping. I can come if you need help choosing."

"You're an asshole and I don’t want new
underwear. Mine is organic unbleached cotton. It's good for my
body."

I creep from the bed and run into the bathroom
and close the door. I look at myself in the mirror and almost
scream. My hair is sticking up all over. Makeup is all over my
face. A fake eyelash is stuck to the side of my face. I never even
knew I was wearing them. My fingers shake as I pull the other one
from my other eye.

I turn on the shower and peel my clothes off.
The hot water feels amazing. I can't help but be pissed at my
friends. Mona is new, so she is kind of off the hook, but Michelle
has been my friend since we were five. How could she leave me here?
They should have made him bring me home.

He has no conditioner so I wash my hair twice
with his Axe shampoo and body wash. I smell like a dude and will
have to condition my hair at some point. I climb out and grab a
towel. I smell it to be sure. It's got the Bounce freshness my
friends houses always had. Not like my house, where the laundry
always smells like tea tree oil. I towel off and pull on the huge
black shirt and boxers he has left me on the counter. I ball my
underwear and bandeau up in my hand and hang the towel up. His
bathroom is nice. It's pretty clean for a twenty-one year old guy.
I scrub his toothbrush with antibacterial soap and brush my teeth.
It feels amazing to be clean and have fresh breath.

I leave the bathroom, nervous. Nervous of being
alone and clean. I make a silent pact I will not lose my virginity
in his dirty frat bed. No matter what. Not matter how I seem to
feel about him.

He is still in his boxers on the bed. I notice
for the first time he has tattoos. A black band around his left
bicep and a blade coming up the underside of his right arm. His
chest has a tribal looking thing in a circle. It's big and black
with something red in the middle. It looks like there is writing on
the other side of the chest tat, but I can't see it because he's
lying on his side.

He smirks, "You look better."

I shake my head, "That was gross. I never wear
makeup so I had a tough time getting it all off. Axe is apparently
not makeup remover."

I look at the door and the bed and my romper on
the floor. I pick it up and roll it into the ball of clothes I'm
holding.

"Well thanks and I guess I'll see you
around."

He smirks, "You don’t want to climb back in here
and repay me? I mean you owe me right?" He smiles like the wolf
would to the bunny.

I laugh and shake my head. I pick up my one shoe
and look around for the other. I hold it up, "I have to get going.
Where is the other one?"

"You lost it on the way out of the bar."

I grimace, "Shit. Not my shoe. Mona's gonna have
a fit." I walk to the door barefoot and smile back, "Thanks
again."

He looks pissed. "Stay."

I shake my head. He scares me. His intensity
scares me. The way I like him scares me. I don’t know him. "No. I
can't. I have to go. I haven’t called my mom in a while. She's
going to freak. I need to get ready. Classes start soon, so. See ya
'round. Thanks for everything. I owe you dinner or something.
Something friendly."

I open the door and make the walk of shame. It's
almost the run of shame. I know I look like the biggest slut ever.
One shoe, a ball of vomit covered clothing, and leaving a frat
house in an oversized black t-shirt and men's underwear. The guys
in his house smirk and smile and grin and make every face
imaginable. I get a couple whistles and few cat calls. I ignore
them.

Thankfully his house and my building aren’t too
far apart. I keep my gaze ahead and try to piece together my
missing two days.

If my mom smudging my building didn’t almost
kill me, walking the hallway was going to. Everyone smirks and
nods. The blonde with the mean girl glare laughs and gives me a
thumbs up.

I almost fall into the room. I slam the door and
press my back into the closed door and wait for it.

Mona smiles, "Hey you. How are you feeling?"

I frown, not what I was expecting. "I lost one
of your shoes."

She points to the closet. "I got it back at the
bar. They had it in the lost and found."

I toss my dirty clothes into a pile on the floor
and look at her. "You left me at his place?"

She bites her lip and smiles, "He's so sweet and
nice and I think he's really into you. When I got there he was
putting cold clothes on your forehead and you were smiling at him
and passing out. You were really sick."

I flop onto my bed, "Yeah I should have seen a
doctor. I wouldn’t have left you with some random dude."

She looks confused, "He's not some random. I saw
you making out with him and I know you were sober. Michelle said
you guys kinda had a thing going on."

I cover my face with my hands, "School hasn’t
even started yet. For Christ's sake. I shouldn’t be this into a
guy. The first guy that looks at me. Ahhh. I'm becoming one of
those girls. You know. The girls who lose their virginity in a frat
bed."

She laughs, "Eww you were sick. You didn’t? Not
while you were sick?"

I shake my head, with my hands still covering my
face, "No I didn’t but oh my god I wanted to. What is wrong with
me? He was laying there with boxers and tattoos and I thought dirty
thoughts. Lots of them."

I lift a hand and look at the shit-eating grin
crossing her lips, "You need to do some poses Mrs.
I-Don’t-Get-Urges."

I laugh and rub my eyes.

"That is normal for a girl like you. You're
sheltered and now for the first time ever you're partying and
making out with boys."

I shake my head, "Eww. No. I don’t want to have
this talk."

My phone vibrates and she scowls, "Dude that
thing has been making ungodly noises all effing weekend."

I pick it up and see the hundred texts from my
mom.

Yikes.

'Nene call me'

'Nene where r u?'

'Okay I'm getting worried now'

'Look kid you call or I'm coming there'

'Fine be there at lunch'

'Is your phone dead'

'Fine be that way. Be the irresponsible kid
who breaks her mother's heart when she goes off to college'

'dammit Nene'

'I had a bad dream about you last night.
There was a man watching you sleep in an armchair and he was
evil'

WTF, how could she have had the same dream as
me? That's never happened before.

'I think it means you are feeling sad about a
boy'

'Nene'

I stop reading and dial home. My hand is
shaking.

"You okay?"

I glance at Mona and nod.

Willow doesn’t answer the phone like she
normally would. She screams so loud Mona can hear her. I hold the
phone away from my face as she blasts me.

"What the hell is your problem? How can you
leave for college and not send me a message or a phone call for
four days? I've been worried sick."

"Hi Willow."

"Hi Willow. Hi Willow. Are you kidding me?"

"Mom stop. I was sick. I got the flu. I've been
asleep for two days."

"Don’t mom me Rayne Willow Whynde Phillips. I
was worried. Who is the boy?"

I sigh into the phone. "His name is Wyatt. He's
nice. He helped when I was sick."

"Okay, well you better be sure he's nice and you
better not be doing anything you shouldn’t be doing."

"Mom I'm nineteen years old. I can do things I
want to do. I can choose for myself. I never did anything. I was
sick."

"Rayne please stop calling me mom. You know how
I feel about labels. I'm sorry I called you kid. Did you sleep in
your room every night? No meat or sex right? You know it'll age you
and waste your chi."

I pinch the bridge of my nose and count
backwards, "I was sick Willow, and my phone was dead. I slept in my
room." I glance at Mona who stifles a laugh.

"What did you have for dinner? Did it have
active plant enzymes or bacteria?"

I nod and lie, "Yeah it did. Vegan menu
remember."

She sighs, "I love you and miss you. I just
think maybe this was too soon for school. Most studies show the
most successful career choices are made when a person is in their
thirties."

I shake my head, I'm done. "I love you and I
will call next weekend okay?"

"A whole week?"

"Four days Willow, not a week. It's Monday. I
will call Saturday."

"Fine. I'll send a care pack."

I know it's pointless to argue, "Okay. I'd like
that."

"Want the carob bark?"

I nod rapidly, as if she can see me, "Yes. Yes
please. Love you."

"Love you too."

I put the phone down and Mona bursts into
laughter. "She is so awesome. I want to be friends with her. She is
intense."

I give her my best eff off look and lie back
down. "You wouldn’t make it through the colonics."