Authors: Amy Lane
Tags: #Paperback, #Novel, #GLBT, #Contemporary, #Romance, #Contemporarygay, #M/M Romance, #dreamspinner press, #amy lane
pass, with the defense, to catch the rebound or return the lost alley-oop.
Xander Karcek was the superstar, and he hated it, but even the papers
and the colleges acknowledged that he wouldn"t have been who he was
without Christian Edwards.
He loved that.
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Amy Lane
IT DIDN"T take much nudging for the two of them to get offers from the
same school. It was out of state, which was exciting for Chris and not a
problem for Xander. Neither of them had ever been to North Carolina,
and their odds of being recruited by a pro team doubled when they went
there, as opposed to someplace local. (They both deplored Los Angeles,
so UCLA was right out.) By the time their junior year ended, UNC had
them both in its sights: Xander would get a free ride, and Chris would
get tuition and books. His parents had enough saved to set him up in the
dorms for a year or two, and in the summer before his senior year, Chris
went to work right next to Xander, to ensure that as long as they could
play the game, the two of them could stay side by side, the way God
intended.
Working together was almost like playing ball. Chris would do
window in the late nights, and chat up all the customers. Xander would
work assiduously in the back, making sure they could leave on time, or
even early, as soon as they closed, so that he and Chris could take ten
minutes, even fifteen, downstairs in the changing room to kiss, to hold
hands. To lean into each other, and talk tenderly of the things they"d
seen. Xander didn"t have much to model this behavior after, but Chris
did, and Xander had seen it. Chris"s parents sat together on the couch,
Andi between Jed"s legs and leaning on his chest, and watched movies,
spoke quietly about their day, told stories about the kids, Xander
included.
Later, when Chris and Penny had gone upstairs and Xander was
stretched out on the hide-a-bed (his feet fell over the edge), Xander could
hear their voices, still talking. He"d heard tense conversations, sure, but
never screaming. Never yelling. Never unkind words. Not once, in his
entire two-and-a-half years in their care, did he hear one of them call the
other a “useless cocksucker” or a “fucking twat.” To Xander, all of that
other kindness, the whispered giggles, the furtive (and mortifying)
sounds of lovemaking that came from their closed doors, came from
those stolen moments on the couch, when they got to touch.
He and Chris did their best to capture that. Without talking about it,
they used the Edwards"s as a relationship manual, and did their
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homework as often as time allowed. The feeling of Chris, snugged up
against his chest, talking about their calculus teacher, was all that Xander
asked of heaven—and that would hold true even if Chris didn"t make
him crack up with every story. (Apparently the poor lady was an
unintentional laugh riot. Chris swore he"d never seen a woman trip over
quite so many things in a ten-minute lecture. “And it"s not like any of
that shit
moves,
Xan. She just gets so excited about
math,
of all things,
that she forgets it"s there all over again.”)
But Xander"s body was getting “itchy.” In their junior year, he
could watch Chris undress and think of him platonically, or even not at
all. By the end of their senior year, Xander was putting off showering
with Chris when they were in a crowd.
“Dude,” he muttered unhappily, “it"s like you"re a walking boner
pill. I see you naked and my whole body goes on virgin alert!”
“Which one of us is that pinging for?” Chris asked coyly, kissing
the corner of his jaw as they sat at the employee picnic table at work.
“Because, you know, mine is going full time too!”
“Double the virgin, double the ping,” Xander said, smirking, and
then Chris kissed him until the smirk went away and only the “pinging”
survived. Then Xander"s actual timer went off, and the two of them
sighed. Time to go upstairs and wait for Jed or Andi. The boys had gone
back and forth over the wisdom of buying their own car, but at the
moment, they figured they"d use public transportation in NC and deal
with what they had in Cali. Xander appreciated Mr. and Mrs. Edwards
looking out for them, he really did, but he"d already established one
more requirement in his list of “grown-up shit” that he wanted for
himself and Christian. He had it firmly locked down in his head:
College degree: check
Well-paying job: check
House that no one could take away from him ever: check
Car: check
Safety, and no chance that anyone would scream at him or beat him
or terrify him with their neglect: check
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Amy Lane
Christian, his and in his arms forever: Absolutely. The first and last
thing on his checklist. The absolute only thing he could never live
without.
Basketball: A requirement as well.
He figured that, since Christian and basketball went hand in hand,
that was one thing he didn"t have to worry about, right?
THEY lost their virginity to each other the summer between high school
and college, when Christian"s parents took Penny to visit Chris"s
grandparents. Chris had been planning to go with them, but then Andi"s
parents had showed up for graduation, and given him a car as a
combination graduation/eighteenth-birthday present, and then told Chris
to enjoy. Chris had taken them at their word (and had, with Xander"s
help, written the mother of all thank-you letters, because he was a good
boy and that was only good manners) and begged off the trip.
Jed and Andi had told them no parties, but they had done it
laughingly. Andi had kissed her son"s forehead as they left and said,
“You two are so good it"s almost frightening. Don"t let any of that
change, okay?”
Penny had eyed the two of them almost sadly as they left. “So,
guys, any plans?” she asked, swinging her blonde braid behind her with a
little bit of attitude. She was a very female version of Chris—small face,
dark round eyes, curling blonde hair. She"d been the perfect little sister
in the past two years—snotty, teasing, and not ever, once, showing any
affection unless it was forced out of her. The last time Xander could
remember her giving either of them a soft word was when Xander had
played ball with a fever of 104. She"d stayed up by the couch that night,
taking shifts with Chris and her parents, making sure he was going to be
okay. He remembered the delirium, and her small hand on his forehead,
and her voice, sounding sad, saying, “It"s okay, Xander. Chris is here. He
just needed to sleep for a bit, okay?”
That same sound was in her voice this time, and before her parents
knew what she was doing, she suddenly turned around from the door
where she was standing and ran into Xander"s arms. He was looking at
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her, bemusedly, when she planted a soft, mushy, inexpert kiss on his lips,
and he was still stunned as she backed away, wiping her mouth with the
back of her hand.
“Guess not,” she murmured. “Have a good weekend, Xander.
Think of me.”
And then they were gone, probably so Jed and Andi could scold her
in peace.
They waited until the rumble of the car had cleared their residential
block, and then Xander turned to Chris and said, “What was that all
abou—” when Chris was all over him. Mouth to mouth, body to body,
Xander went backward over the arm of the flowered couch and Chris
was right there, on top of him, kissing him until he couldn"t breathe and
couldn"t see and couldn"t think. He groaned, and hunger—all of that
carefully hidden hunger, all of that repressed need—roared through him,
and he went from good boy to horny man in one thrust of Chris"s tongue
into his mouth.
His cock was aching and full, and even though he was wearing
cargo shorts, it was about to burst out of them, and Chris was thrusting
his groin against his and oh
God…
it was like his body had a license to
feel,
to
react,
to
crave
and without warning, his entire body went cold,
then swept hot, and pressure built up in him, everywhere from his balls
to the back of his eyes. He wrapped his legs around the back of Chris"s
thighs, wrapped his arms around Chris"s shoulders, buried his face in
between that soft, male-scented hollow and Chris"s unruly curls and
howled, spilling in his pants after five minutes of necking on the couch.
In his arms, Chris shuddered and keened, and his groin thrust one
more time against Xander"s and the rapidly cooling spend inside
Xander"s shorts was heated up again when Christian came against him.
Xander kept his arms and legs wrapped around Chris for as long as
possible after that.
They had to move, though. The couch wasn"t comfortable, and
they"d just come inside their shorts, and there was still that horrible
paranoia about Chris"s parents forgetting something and coming back.
(The boys had circled the house six times in an effort to help them pack,
out of sheer habit. Andi was incredibly organized, but Jed had almost
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Amy Lane
forgotten his fishing tackle, his swimming trunks, and his cell phone
with GPS. As Xander had handed that last one to him, he"d laughed and
said that there were lots of reasons that kids were a blessing, as he put
the thing in his pocket.)
Chris shifted first, rolling off of Xander and onto his knees, landing
with a thump. He buried his face into Xander"s neck again, and Xander
stroked that wildly tangling hair. (Chris was wearing it long, without any
sort of cut or product in it, just as an experiment. He looked very
seventies.)
“Wow, big guy,” Chris laughed, still breathless. “I never would
have guessed you had that in you.”
Xander blushed and struggled to sit up. “It"s been waiting a long
time. But I can"t believe we just did that in your parents" living room!
Jesus… I swore that wouldn"t happen.”
Chris offered him a hand and Xander took it, finding himself
hauled into Chris"s arms. He looked down at his friend, his brother, and
now, maybe, his lover, and was reassured when those well-dark eyes
sparkled up at him. “Maybe it"s "cause I"m legal now, right?”
Xander rolled his eyes. “So am I!”
Chris nodded seriously. “So, like, we"re grown-ups. And this is
real. And it"s not taking advantage of my parents" hospitality, it"s having
a relationship with someone in a home.”
Suddenly he couldn"t meet Chris"s eyes anymore. A relationship.
They"d been practicing a relationship, but now they were really going to
have one. The romantic kind. The kind you couldn"t take back. “Lovers
go away,” he said, rawly. Maybe it was because they"d just come in each
other"s arms, and maybe it was because Chris was expecting them to
take it even further. Maybe it was because he"d seen his mother with
man after man, and none of them kind, or the fact that every tabloid in
the grocery store was full of people bouncing off each other like rubber
dodge balls, but the thought that once Chris became a lover, he could go
away?
Terrifying. Simply terrifying.
Chris"s hand came up, cupped his jaw, pulled his face around.
“Look at me, Xander. Please?”
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Their eyes collided and caught, and Chris nodded, as though to
make sure he had Xander"s complete attention.
You have had my
complete attention since we met, Christian. You will always have my
complete attention.
“I"m not going anywhere, okay, Xan? You and me. We"re it. We"re
forever, okay? Like my folks. They met in high school and put each
other through college and finish each other"s sentences. It happens
sometimes. It"s real. Just believe it, okay? Believe in it, and it will be
real.”
Xander nodded, and then hugged Chris compulsively to him again.
They separated reluctantly—they had to work that night, and they had to
shower, and it was just time, but Chris gave him a quick brush of the lips
before turning and trotting upstairs to wash. Xander used the downstairs
shower, and because they were both running at the same time, the water
was lukewarm at best. Xander decided to add a really big hot water