The Love He Craves (The Love She Craves: Selling Her Soul to Declan Book 2) (2 page)

He laughed as he took her hands in his before she could move further away. “We haven’t even consummated the marriage yet. Undress me, wife.” He used the tone he used when he was one hundred percent Dom.

She suddenly looked as if she might cry. “I don’t want to,” she whispered looking down.

“You don’t want to undress me?” he asked pulling at his tie.

“I don’t want to have sex right now.”

He froze, then took a step back, and crossed his arms over his chest. “Then why are you naked?”

“Stress relief your way.” It almost sounded like a question.

Did his confusion show on his face? “Nyxie, it’s never been the punishment that makes the subs feel better. It’s crying afterwards. And from what I’ve seen, you’re more likely to cry after sex than after pain.” He had explained that to her before, and to say it again, made his tone reflect his irritation.

“Are you mad at me?”

“I’m confused. This is all because Willa called?” She nodded, pressing her lips together. “You knew I had been with other women.”

Nyxie stood there for a long moment before raising her gaze to his face. “You’ve done all these things you do with me, with them?”

He reached out both hands and cupped her face. “Actually, I haven’t. I’ve never popped a woman’s cherry, or had 1812 sex with anyone but you. And I’ve never been with anyone I’ve ever been in love with, except you. Screwing in a judge’s chamber was another first for me. And I’ve never made love with anyone’s wife, not even my own and I intend to remedy that ASAP.”

A shy smile crossed her lips making her bottom lip bow and pout out in that way that fascinated him. She moved closer and began removing his clothing.

Chapter 2

“There’s a lot to be said for vanilla sex,” Declan said breathlessly, stretched out over Nyxie. “Or maybe it’s married sex.”

She laughed, squirming under his weight to get more comfortable. “If I’d known two-person sex was so great, I might’ve tried it years ago.”

He rose up on his elbow and brushed a strand of hair off her forehead. “I’m glad you didn’t know. You can’t imagine how pleased I am, that I am your one and only. I’ve been toying with the idea of framing the bed sheet with the blood on it.”

“Oh, gross.” Her nose scrunched up bringing her upper lip with it to bare her front teeth.

He chuckled at her reaction, loving that he could see the overbite she so often managed to hide. “No one but the two of us would know what it was. If anyone saw it and asked, we just say it’s modern art.”

“No, that’s disgusting,” she said laughing. “Please, tell me you’re not serious.”

“Actually, I am. Maybe because I am in the medical field, I see blood differently from others. It’s the essence of all life. It’s amazing to me these little red cells can feed your body, white ones can fight infection, and if you draw a bit, you can find out all sorts of things about someone’s health. And now, they make TVs out of the plasma,” he joked.

Smiling at him, she reached her hand into his hair. “Yeah, it must be a doctor thing, because I still say it’s nasty. With blood on it, you’re not going to be able to find anyone willing to frame it for you. Maybe you should take a picture, and use your computer to warp it into a Yin-Yang symbol.”

He cocked his head to one side as he contemplated her suggestion. “I actually like that idea. Maybe I will. But I’m not giving up on making art work of it. I don’t want to frame the whole thing—just a strip as wide as the bed and maybe 9 inches tall. We’ll hang it in the bedroom.

~*~

Nyxie was beginning to realize Declan liked to spend the short drive from the house to the hospital making phone calls. He started dialing before they pulled out of his garage.

“Sonia,” he said when his housekeeper answered the phone. “I have a huge favor to ask you. Do you and your daughters have some time today when you could do some serious shopping for me?”

“I bet I can find a free hour or two,” she said cheerfully. “Have you decided to throw a big Fourth of July party?”

His eyebrows shot up. “That’s not a bad idea, I’ll have to check my schedule, but right now I need something else. I need you to get Nyxie’s side of the house ready for her kids to move in. They need everything from food and toilet paper, sheets and dishes, to pots and pans.”

There was a moment of silence on the other end of the line. “Okay. But won’t your girlfriend want to pick out her own stuff?”

“Nyxie is trying to adopt her sister’s girls. CPS is coming by for home study sometime in the next couple of days. However, her brother just woke up from his coma, and she doesn’t want to leave his side to buy what she needs. Let me give you her phone number, and you can consult her on decorative things.”

It took Sonia a moment to get into her contacts before the information was passed. “And what’s Nyxie’s last name?”

“Stryker,” Declan said with a wide grin, making Nyxie gasp. His head jerked around and he pinned her with a hard stare.

“I didn’t think we were going to tell anyone,” Nyxie said quietly hoping her voice wasn’t picked up on the hands-free device. Her eyes were wide as she looked back at him. He seemed angry but she wasn’t sure why.

“We got married this morning,” Declan said to Sonia. “We haven’t told my parents, so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone just yet.”

“Congratulations and best wishes,” she said, sounding perplexed, but saying what she knew was polite.

They thanked her in unison, and then quickly got off the phone. Declan turned to Nyxie. “We aren’t telling anyone?” he asked.

“You want people to know?” Her tone sounded high pitched with surprise. She searched his face to see if he was kidding, but didn’t know him well enough to pick up on the subtle cues of teasing with a straight face.

“Why wouldn’t we?” he asked, tilting his head to the side.

Wasn’t it obvious This marriage didn’t really count because it wasn’t real. When their contract was up, they would quietly divorce, and no one would know they were ever married.

“You’ve already gotten pulled off Cody’s case because we know each other. I don’t want you to get in trouble for marrying me.”

“The damage is already done, and no one was overly scandalized.”

“Not yet,” she said as he drove the Jeep into the doctors’ parking lot. “Can’t we just keep this to ourselves?”

His brow lowered. “I know it was sudden. Would you prefer that we announce we’re engaged? I wanted to have a second ceremony anyway.”

Why would he want to have a second ceremony or to tell anyone what they had done when it wasn’t real? “I don’t understand why you want to have a second ceremony.”

“Well, among other things, my parents are going to be upset that I got married and they weren’t invited. Wouldn’t you like to do it again with our friends and families there? Don’t you want the big church wedding?”

“Your parents hate me. They won’t want to know you married me.”

Declan pulled into a parking place and shut off the engine. He unbuckled his seatbelt and turned his whole body to face her.

“Nyxie, I don’t go out of my way to hurt my parents. We may disagree about many things, but we still love each other. My mother would be devastated.”

She bit her lip and nodded. She conceded, with as much understanding as anyone could have, a child had unconditional love for his or her parents. Despite everything, she had always loved her parents, even when she hated them the most. It was easily the most confusing part of being an abused child. Perhaps it was because there were always good moments sprinkled in with the bad; like the time her father baked her oatmeal cookies for her birthday and told her she could eat as many as she wanted. Or when her mother got her tax refund and gave Nyxie five dollars that she could spend on anything. Sometimes she would be praised for taking care of Cody, or for mysteriously producing liquor when her father suffered withdrawals and was hallucinating. Nyxie always tried to drain the last few drops from the bottles before carrying them to the dumpster, or if he passed out before the bottle was empty, she might pour off a swig or two for the bad times to come.

“Maybe you should go talk to them and explain that it’s not real. I’m sure they’ll be relieved.”

He stared at her, his eyes narrowing. “That judge wasn’t pretending, Onyx. We are really married.”

She hated when he called her Onyx. Not only did it show his annoyance, but it also took her back to her childhood when everyone called her that. “You know what I mean. We’re not
really
married. My Dom saw I had a need….”

His head tilted to one side, studying her face, his eyes boring into hers until she felt so uncomfortable that she had to look away.

“You think I married you because of our agreement? You don’t understand….”

“I’m not the one who’s confused.”

“You are if you think we’re getting divorced in a year or two.”

Her big brown eyes widened as she returned his stare. Of course, it wasn’t real. Why was he making this joke? He never joked around. Then she realized he wasn’t making a joke. “You didn’t even ask me if I wanted to get married,” she said, taking off her seatbelt.

Afraid that she was going to bolt, Declan grabbed her wrist. Before he could speak, the phone rang. The car’s radio display said
Incoming call from Dr. Patel
, his boss. Releasing her, he put his finger in front of his lips to silently ask Nyxie not to speak while he answered it through the car’s hands-free device.

“Dr. Stryker,” Declan said in his usual curt tone when answering the phone.

“Dr. Stryker, when are you going to be here? I’ve got a trauma on her way to the OR and I wanted to know if I need to find someone else.”

Declan had already spoken to Dr. Patel about coming to work late that morning, so he knew he wasn’t being reprimanded. “I’m in the parking lot. It’ll take me about ten minutes to get changed.”

“Very good,” he said, his voice tinted with his native Indian accent. “Did your appointment go well?”

“Yes, it was mostly just signing papers and whatnot. I appreciate you being so understanding,” Declan said, shrugging at Nyxie. “I used a little bit of my extra time this morning to get married.”

“Brilliant,” he said and paused. “I didn’t know you were seeing anyone. It’s not the bike accident’s sister is it?”

He smiled widely until he saw Nyxie shaking her head at him with lines formed between her eyebrows. “It is, actually.”

“You surprise me. Usually Americans are so cautious about these things. My wife and I only met twice before we were married. Our fathers were in business together. The whole thing was arranged when we were children. But now, we have been happily married for 27 years. Congratulations.”

Declan actually smiled at her, as if to say she was all wrong about what people would think.

“Thanks. I’m on my way.”

He hung up and climbed out of the Jeep, grabbing his phone and gym bag, and her overnight bag.

“We’re not finished discussing this,” he said when he had her door open.

“That’s a surprise,” she said sarcastically as she slid from the seat until her feet hit the asphalt. “I figured you had already made up my mind for me.”

That rare boyish grin that made her heart drop into her stomach, spread across his face, and he took a hold of her hand as they walked into the building. “I have, but I’ll listen to your arguments. Don’t you want to be married to me?”

It was just like him to ask it that way. He didn’t ask if she wanted to marry him. She was sure he couldn’t imagine anyone
not
wanting to walk down the proverbial aisle if he asked. He was handsome and rich. Who wouldn’t want that?

A million reasons why
not
to be married to him flashed through her mind. She felt she barely knew him. Did she want to be in a relationship where there would always be a threat of corporal punishment hanging over her head?

“I don’t know. My mother married the first person she slept with. I don’t want to repeat her mistakes. How well do we really know each other?”

“Here’s everything you need to know about me,” he said, stopping and turning to face her. “I love you and I know you love me too.” He kissed her gently, lingeringly. “I’ve got to go, baby. We will finish this conversation later.”

~*~

Before she went upstairs, Nyxie stopped by the information desk to see if they had moved Cody out of the SICU. “Yes,” the elderly volunteer said. “He was moved to a regular room on the pediatric floor. Would you like me to write down his room number?”

“Please. Now that he’s in a regular room, is he allowed to have flowers and balloons?” She didn’t ask for herself but she knew Mrs. North had asked about it.

“Yes. There is a gift shop just past the elevators if you would like to buy some.”

“Thanks.”

Nyxie dismissed the idea of going to the gift shop out of hand. She’d never waste money like that. As she stood waiting for an elevator, her eyes drifted to the glass walls of the little store. It was bright and colorful inside, filled with plants, balloons and stuffed animals. Then it occurred to her that she might be able to buy Cody something. She had extra money since Declan said he’d pay her bills. No one had told her if the money they had collected at the diner was expressly for Cody’s medical bills, but she’d set it aside with that assumption. She took a step back as the elevator emptied and filled up with new passengers, but her eyes were fixed elsewhere.

Nyxie walked toward the shop and examined the contents through the glass. After a minute of perusal and day dreaming, she sat down on a bench across the hall, and fished her little notebook out of her purse. Declan had taken her water bill and electric bill, and had promised to pay them, but Nyxie was reluctant to spend money until she knew they were paid. Besides, she knew she still had the final bills to pay, and she wasn’t working. Yes, she definitely needed to hold onto her money.

She made notations in her little book, moving the money back into the cash on hand column. When she didn’t know where to put the money from the collection, she started a new page. Would she have to pay taxes on it?

Shit
.

Why did it always take ten minutes of debate to spend a few dollars? She put aside the notebook and counted the money that was not earmarked for Cody’s bills or her household expenses. Thirty-seven dollars. It would have been used for groceries, and anything remaining, would have been used to buy clothing from garage sales for school next year. She eyed the bank app on her phone as if it were a bottle of her daddy’s liquor. Eventually, she would run out of her own money and she would be forced to use the money Declan put into an account for her.

As she logged in, she made herself a promise, if there was more than $200, she’d spend up to five dollars on a balloon for Cody. If there was less or the balloon was more, Cody would have to do without.