The Man in the Monster (31 page)

In a sense, Michael died for the monster's deeds. The monster never would have made that sacrifice, but Michael was ready and willing to give up his life as punishment for his crimes. In a twisted way, he saw himself as a martyr, dying so that others could get on with their lives. He wanted to make his last act proof that he was sorry for what he had done so that maybe someday even one member of his victims' families would finally forgive him. There was also an element of control in the decision—he, not the state of Connecticut, set the timetable. He knew he was going to die in prison. All he did was move up the date. Michael was pragmatic about the role of politics in criminal justice. He didn't think any judge or jury would ever give him a life sentence, and he didn't think the legislature would abolish the death penalty as long as he was on death row, and I think he was right in that assessment.

On April 4, 2012, the Connecticut State Senate passed a prospective death penalty abolition bill, and the State House of Representatives followed suit on April 12. Governor Dannel Malloy signed it into law on April 25, making Connecticut the seventeenth state to repeal its death penalty statute. The Connecticut law replaced capital punishment with life without parole, but it is a prospective abolition and does not apply to the men already on death row. Some anti–death penalty
advocates believe that Michael's execution made abolition possible in Connecticut; the reality of death had shocked people into realizing that if a state has a death penalty, ultimately it will execute someone.

But Michael Ross was no hero or martyr. Michael murdered eight women and inflicted unbearable pain on nine families, including his own. He would want me to remind everyone of that fact. He didn't want to be remembered as a monster, but he also didn't want anyone to forget the monster's deeds.

My job has been presenting the two pictures of Michael Ross. I met a serial killer on paper and through his memories, and I saw all too clearly the incredible damage he had done. For ten years, I also got to know a man who would have done anything to have changed the course of his life and undone that damage. He was a man who believed that when it is in your power to do what you believe is right, it is your moral obligation to do it no matter what the consequences. He was convinced that he had only one moral option—to forgo appeals and accept death. Anything less would have violated his own moral code. Intertwined with his Christian beliefs were transcendentalist tenets. It didn't matter that man's law gave him the option to file appeals for decades; he was following both his own conscience and his higher power. The right thing to do was to die and let the families move on. In that regard, Michael did accomplish the one thing that he always said was his primary goal: Mrs. Shelley will never again cry in court.

Michael's case not only gives us a glimpse of the myriad factors that led to his becoming a serial killer, but also poses important questions about mental illness and the death penalty. I believe our justice system understands mental illness as well as nineteenth-century doctors understood bacteria. Justice is often wantonly and disproportionately meted out when the psychiatric bases of horrendous crimes are decided by juries and even judges.

No doctor offered the definitive reason why Michael killed. It remained a question that tormented him. All the psychiatrists who examined him agreed that he was a sexual sadist, however. Dr. Borden even felt his illness went beyond sexual sadism and concluded that he had a sadistic personality disorder. Because of that diagnosis, Dr. Borden said it wasn't the rape that was the ultimate sexual release; it was the murder. How much of his mental illness was genetic and how much of it was environmental could not be determined. Some tragic alchemy of his genetics, brain structure, and body chemistry, coupled with his childhood experiences, created a sadistic serial killer. I am certain that he did not choose to be violent, as Dr. Lonnie Athens would have us believe, nor did he have murderous intent. This is key to understanding Michael. He desperately needed people to believe that he did not
want
to rape and murder and that he could not control his behavior.

He was not a sociopath devoid of emotions or remorse. He had a conscience. What made him unable to control his murderous impulses? As I told the Shelleys, I don't think anyone could commit the horrific acts that Michael did without being mentally ill. Until we have a fuller understanding of mental illness, we'll have to wonder whether we are executing people who could not control their behavior. They may not have been “insane” at the time of the murder, given the specifics of the legal definitions that legislatures write and judges interpret, but there are impulses that some of us can't control. Michael Ross's story illustrates the devastation caused by unsuccessful attempts at diagnosing and treating mental illness. At least nine lives could have been saved if he had been given early and competent help to keep him from raping and killing.

Mental illness is often seen as an excuse used by a defendant, not a real medical condition that needs to be considered by the jury. Perhaps part of the problem is that the balancing act that jurors are asked to
perform is sometimes actually a moral dilemma rather than a legal or medical one. They are told to balance the crimes and circumstances against the mitigating factors. They are put in an impossible position, playing God. Michael Ross's case is a perfect example of the flaws in that process. The very facts that should have spared Michael's life—like the number of bodies, proving his sexual sadism and mental illness—were at least part of the reason that caused two juries to decide on death. When there are so many victims, juries are not usually willing to believe the psychiatric evidence and spare a life—even when doctors on both sides agree that the defendant is mentally ill and give him the same diagnosis. There is no doubt in my mind that Michael should not have been put to death by the state of Connecticut.

Even Michael Ross believed the monster was evil, but I believe he would have done anything to cut the monster out of him if he could have. He detested it as much as anyone. Depo-Provera and Depo Lupron were as close as he came to chemotherapy or exorcism, but he couldn't rid himself of the guilt or the culpability. The man I came to know was not evil; he was sick and tormented.

Had Michael Ross been given life without the possibility of parole, his case would have been over in 1987. Even though Ed Shelley might have been disappointed that Michael's life was spared, he would have been spared nearly twenty years of court hearings. The state of Connecticut would have saved millions of dollars; the average death penalty case costs $2 million more than housing a prisoner for life. In Michael's case, the two execution dates alone totaled nearly a half million dollars, and the state paid for defense and prosecution lawyers, judges, security, transportation, and court personnel for two trials and mandatory appeals. I am left wondering what his death actually accomplished.

I realized after his execution that I never told Michael that knowing
him helped me get over my demons, perhaps because I didn't fully comprehend it until he was gone. He was often irritating and demanding, but there were many of us who grew to like or even love him. I know he was thankful to have me as a friend, and I have to admit I felt the same way. Perhaps what I learned most from Michael Ross is that even the person who is supposed to be the worst of the worst is still a human being. Michael Ross taught me that profound Quaker tenet—all of us have a little of the divinity within us.

But ultimately Michael's story is about everyone's need to find forgiveness. I often catch myself thinking about Father John Gilmartin's question, about what Michael would say to the women he murdered when he met them in heaven, and I'm sure it would be “Please forgive
me.”

Many people supported me during the nearly twenty years I was reporting and writing this manuscript, including my parents, Clara and Jack Elliott, who passed away before this book could become a reality. They provided me with the moral compass and courage to be willing to get to know Michael and be his friend. I am very grateful for the support of a few friends and family members who read drafts or kept me going in many ways: Lina and John Paul Beltran, Michael and Tracy Bollag, Rebecca Ditmore, Susan Elliott, the Reverend Rob Fischer, Ruth Friendly, Jack Hitt, Cynthia McFadden, Harry Sims, Joyce and Don Sipple, J. B. Stewart, the Reverend Ann Symington, and Dana White. I need to especially thank my dear friends Jenifer Stewart and Dede Lavas, who gave me their unwavering love and support.

Essential to this project was the cooperation and assistance of the people who were part of Michael's story and helped me to understand it—Dr. Walter Borden, Jennifer Tabor Carcia, Ann Cole, Fred DeCaprio, Father John Gilmartin, Karen Goodrow, Dr. James Merikangas, Paula Montonye, Susan, Dan Ross, Peter Scillieri, Jennifer Shelley, and Pete and Frances Wolak. Special thanks go to Dr. Fred Berlin, Barry Butler, and Ed and Lera Shelley, who spent countless hours helping me.

This manuscript would not have become a book had it not been for the support of my agent, Wayne Kabak, as well as the vision of Ann Godoff, president and editor in chief of Penguin Press. My editor, senior editor Virginia Smith Younce and her former assistant, Kaitlin Flynn, gave me invaluable critiques and kept me working on the manuscript until I got it right. William Carnes, who later succeeded Kaitlin as Ginny's assistant, was a crucial guide in getting this book to press. Thank you to the countless others at Penguin Random House who worked behind the scenes to make this book a reality.

My three children, Hannah, James, and Hadley Cornell, gave me loving support and almost always understood when I took Michael's calls at all hours of the night and day or worked on the book during weekends and holidays. I am especially in debt to Hadley, who has her doctorate in clinical psychology and read several drafts of the book.

Of course, ultimately I am most grateful to Michael Ross, who spent ten years confiding his innermost thoughts to me. Without his trust, his story could never have been told.

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INTERVIEWS

Some of the people who agreed to talk to me asked that they not be quoted directly or mentioned as a source. The following is a list of the people I interviewed who agreed to be identified as sources:

Dr. Fred Berlin

Dr. Walter Borden

Barry Butler

Jennifer Carcia

Ann Cole

Fred DeCaprio

Father John Gilmartin

Karen Goodrow

Michael Malchik

Dr. James Merikangas

Paula Montonye

Michael Ross

C. Robert Satti Jr.

Peter Scillieri

Ed and Lera Shelley

Jennifer Shelley

Susan

Pete and Frances Wolak

UNPUBLISHED ARCHIVAL SOURCES

It would be impossible to list every unpublished document used for this book. What follows is a list of the major sources referenced in the manuscript.

Autopsy reports in the deaths of Wendy Baribeault, April Brunais, Leslie Shelley, and Robin Stavinsky.

Connecticut State Police reports investigating attacks of “Carol” in North Carolina, summarizing reports of state and local police.

Connecticut State Police reports investigating attacks of “Priscilla” in Ohio, summarizing reports of state and local police.

Connecticut State Police reports investigating the deaths of Wendy Baribeault, April Brunais, Leslie Shelley, Robin Stavinsky, Debra Smith Taylor, and Tammy Williams.

Connecticut State Police reports investigating the deaths of Dzung Ngoc Tu and Paula Perrera.

Cornell University Campus Police reports investigating rapes on campus 1980–81 and the death of Dzung Ngoc Tu.

Crime scene photos concerning the deaths of Wendy Baribeault, April Brunais, Leslie Shelley, and Robin Stavinsky.

Ithaca police reports investigating rapes at Cornell and the death of Dzung Ngoc Tu.

Journals of Michael Ross, vol. 1–4, May 12, 1977–October 18, 1998.

Johnstown, Ohio, police reports investigating the attack on “Sharon.”

Illinois police reports in connection with the attack on “Priscilla.”

Letters from Michael Ross to Martha Elliott, 1995–2005.

Letter from Michael Ross to State's Attorney C. Robert Satti Sr.

Letters from Michael Ross to Susan, 2005.

Letters from Michael Ross to various family members.

Letters from Lera Shelley to Martha Elliott, 2000–2011.

Letter from Dr. Robert Miller to State's Attorney C. Robert Satti Sr.

Letters to Michael Ross from members of his family.

Letter to Michael Ross from Jennifer Shelley.

Letter from Jennifer Shelley to Michael Ross.

Psychiatric evaluations by Dr. Fred Berlin, Dr. Walter Borden, Dr. Raymond DuCharme, Dr. Michael Eligenstein, Dr. John Cegalis, and Dr. James Merikangas.

State
v
.
Ross,
trial transcript, Mar. 1987–June 4, 1987.

Transcript of closed hearing before Judge Seymour Hendel.

Transcript of taped confession of Michael Ross.

Videotapes, psychiatric evaluations by Dr. Howard Zonana, 1985, tapes 1–6.

Walking with Michael
, newsletters from Michael Ross to people all over the world, 1996–
2005.