The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya (23 page)

… Or this was no longer the old world. It was the new world Haruhi had created. If that was the case, was there a way for me to confirm that?

No. Maybe, but I couldn’t think of anything. Actually, I didn’t want to think at all. If I was going to have to accept that my brain was capable of coming up with such a stupid dream, I’d rather the world be destroyed. It made me want to pull my hair out.

I picked up my alarm clock and checked the time. 2:30 am.

… I’m going back to bed.

I pulled my covers over my head and attempted to coax my frozen brain into slumber.

Only I didn’t sleep a wink.

Which is why I walked up the hill to school the next day in a foul mood. Quite frankly, it was painful. The only saving grace was that I didn’t run into Taniguchi and have to deal with his stupid blabbering. The blazing sun faithfully engaged in full power nuclear fusion. Would it kill the sun to lower the thermostat every now and then for our sake?

The sleepytime fairies, which hadn’t shown up when I wanted them to, were now circling over my head. I really doubted I’d hear much, if any, of what was said in first period.

Once the school was in sight, I stopped and stared bemusedly at the decrepit four-story building. The front gate, clubhouse, and passageway, sucking in students the way an anthill sucks in ants, were all there. I dragged my legs slowly up the stairs to head for my familiar 1-5 classroom. I stopped moving three steps from the open doorway.

Haruhi was already sitting in the last row next to the window.
Why?
She had her chin in her hands as she looked out the window. The back of her head was in plain sight.

A tied-off portion of her black hair stuck out like a topknot. It wasn’t really a ponytail. She just tied off a bit of hair, didn’t she? Still…

“Yo. How’s it going?” I asked.

I dropped my bag on my desk.

“I feel miserable. I had a nightmare last night,” Haruhi answered in a flat voice.

Well, isn’t that a coincidence.

“I ended up not getting any sleep. I’ve never wanted to skip school as badly as I do today.”

“Oh, really?”

I sat down in the hard chair and peered at Haruhi’s face. The strands of hair above her ear were covering the side of her face, so I couldn’t really make out her expression. Just as well. I could tell she wasn’t in a good mood. At least, that’s the impression I got.

“Haruhi,” I said.

“What?”

As Haruhi refused to budge from staring out the window, I said to her, “Your hair looks nice today.”

Let’s talk a little about what happened afterward.

By noon, Haruhi had untied her hair and restored it to its former straight style. She probably got sick of that knot. Once her hair grows longer, I’ll try indirectly suggesting she try a ponytail again.

I ran into Koizumi during break, on the way back from the restroom.

“I need to thank you,” he said with an overly easy smile on his face.

“The world remains unchanged. Suzumiya is still here. It looks like I won’t be out of a job just yet. Indeed, you did really well. I’m not being sarcastic. Although we can’t discount the possibility that this world was newly created last night. In any case, I feel privileged to see you and Suzumiya again.”

He said that this might be the beginning of a long friendship as he waved goodbye.

“I’ll see you after school.”

When I went to the club room during lunch, I found the usual sight of Nagato reading.

“You and Haruhi Suzumiya disappeared from this world for two and a half hours,” were the first words out of her mouth. And the only words. As Nagato began to ignore me like I was a stranger and silently read, I opened my mouth.

“I’m reading the book you lent me. I can probably return it in another week or so.”

“I see.”

As always, she didn’t look at me.

“Tell me. How many others like you are on Earth?”

“Many.”

“Will another one like Asakura attack me?”

“Don’t worry.”

For once, Nagato raised her head and looked into my eyes. “I won’t let them.”

I decided not to mention what I had thought of her at the library.

After school, Asahina was, oddly enough, wearing her sailor uniform instead of her maid outfit in the club room. When she saw me, she threw her body onto mine.

“I’m so glad to see you again,” Asahina said in a tearful voice as she buried her face in my chest. “I thought you’d never—
sniff
—be able—
sniff
—to return to this world—”

Maybe she felt my arms creeping around behind her. Asahina suddenly thrust her arms into my chest and pushed me away.

“We… we mustn’t. If Suzumiya sees us like this, it’ll happen all over again.”

“I don’t understand what you mean.”

Her large, teary eyes were beyond lovely. You could be born anew looking at them. No man in the world could resist her eyes of pristine innocence.

“You’re not going to wear your maid outfit today?”

“It’s being cleaned.”

That’s when I remembered. I pointed to a spot above my heart.

“I just remembered something, Asahina. You have a star-shaped mole around this spot on your chest, right?”

Asahina wiped the tears from the corner of her eyes and made a face like a passenger pigeon after a shotgun was fired right before its eyes. She quickly turned around and tugged the neckline of her dress to look down her chest. Her ears instantly turned red, which amused me to no end.

“H-how did you know?! I never knew it was shaped like a star! Wh-wh-wh-wh-when did you see it?!”

Even Asahina’s neck was turning red as she hit me with her fists like a child.

Should I tell her the truth? Your future self told me.

“What are you people doing?” Haruhi queried from the doorway, disgusted. Asahina’s clenched fist froze as her face became pale again. But Haruhi lifted the paper bag she was carrying with a wicked grin on her face, like an evil stepmother who had just heard that her stepdaughter had eaten the poisoned apple and died.

“Mikuru, you’re probably sick of the maid outfit, right? Come on. It’s time to change.”

Like a master of ancient martial arts, Haruhi crossed the gap in an instant and captured the stiffened Asahina without any trouble at all.

“No—Ah—Wha—St-sto—”

As Asahina screamed, her uniform was forcefully removed.

“Stop struggling. Resistance is futile. This time, you’ll be a nurse. A nurse! Or do they say hospital attendant these days? It doesn’t matter. It means the same thing.”

“At least close the door!”

I would have liked to stay and watch, but I excused myself from the room, shut the door, and clasped my hands in prayer.

Of course, during this entire sequence, Nagato had been sitting at the table reading her book.

The paperwork for chartering the SOS Brigade had been sitting on the shelf for quite some time, but just now, I finally turned in to the student council a document that vaguely resembled an application. The “
S
ave the World by
O
verloading it with Fun Haruhi
S
uzumiya Brigade” would definitely be rejected unless I bribed them, so I arbitrarily changed the name to the “
S
upport the Student Body by
O
verworking to Make the World a Better Place Student
S
ervice Brigade (Student Association)” (a.k.a. SOS Brigade). I listed the club activities as “counseling in regards to school life, consulting services, and participation in local volunteer activities.” I didn’t really know what that all meant, but if the application ended up being accepted, I could stick up a poster on the bulletin board offering counseling. I doubted our counseling would help anyone, though.

Meanwhile, under Haruhi’s supervision, the city-wide “magical mystery patrol” was still going strong. Today we commemorated its second occasion. As always, the plan would be to waste an entire day, but by pure coincidence, Asahina, Nagato, and Koizumi were all unable to go. They mentioned something about important tasks they couldn’t get out of. And so, I was now waiting for Haruhi by myself next to the station’s ticket gate.

I didn’t know if the three of them were just trying to give us some space, or if some emergency had actually cropped up. However, since the three of them were anything but ordinary people, it was quite possible that they had to deal with some funny business that was going down right then in some unknown place.

I checked my watch. I still had thirty minutes until we were supposed to meet. I’d already been standing there for thirty minutes, as I had arrived an hour early. It’s not that I was particularly eager to get cracking, but there was the whole SOS Brigade practice of fining the person who arrives last, regardless of whether that person’s late or not. And there were only two people today.

When I looked up from my watch, I immediately saw a familiar, casually clothed figure in the distance. She probably didn’t expect to find me waiting for her thirty minutes early, seeing as she froze in her tracks before indignantly stomping toward me again. I didn’t know if the creased brow and scowl on her face were lamenting today’s low attendance or lamenting her failure in arriving after me. I would have plenty of time to ask about it later while Haruhi treated me to a drink at the café.

In fact, I had a number of things I wanted to talk to her about. Like what kind of activities Haruhi had planned for the SOS Brigade. The costumes I’d like to see Asahina in. That she should talk to other classmates besides me. Her opinion on Freud and dream interpretation. And so on and so forth.

But when it came down to it, I already knew what I was going to tell her first.

I was planning on telling her about aliens, time travelers, and espers.

For one reason or another, I have this belief that the amount of writing a person is capable of in a lifetime is decided from birth. Assuming that there is a predetermined set amount of words, then the more you write, the more that amount will depreciate. That would forecast the eventual loss of your ability to write. In practical application, let’s say someone wanted to fill up 300 pages of paper with 400 words crammed onto each sheet in one day. Since there’s no precedent of that ever happening, I may actually be right. Of course, if I did want to write 120,000 words in one day, the fact that typing at the speed of one word per second would already take thirty-three hours would mean I could never do it. But there might be someone out there who can accomplish the feat, so I can’t be totally sure.

Speaking of things I can’t do, I’ll change the subject to how cats are nice. They’re cute and soft and they meow. You’re probably wondering where I’m going with this. I don’t really know myself. Not sure how to explain it. I’ll be quite happy if you can accept the “it is what it is” explanation.

Incidentally, I believe that this book was only able to see the light of day after receiving the incredible and very appreciated Sneaker Award. When I was informed that I had won the prize, I was questioning my ears, then my mind, the telephone, reality, and whether or not the earth was rotating. Eventually, the thought
it’s apparently true
crossed my mind, so I began dancing around swinging my cat for no real reason, when it suddenly bit me. I remember that as I stared at the scratches on my palm, I thought that if humans had a predetermined set amount of luck, then I had already used up all of mine. I don’t remember much of what happened after that. After all, the shock to my mind created some gaps in my memory, so I can’t be sure. Though I get the feeling that a lot happened.

Which is why I concluded that the effort put in by the people who had to do all the work and make decisions to get this book published was probably over twice that of the actual author. If I were to attempt to express the gratitude I feel right now, I would probably be unable to find the words to convey how thankful I am. I am especially at a loss for how to show my appreciation to the members of the selection committee. In fact, I’m in the process of devising a new expression, but since it would be my own creation, it would probably end up being interpreted as nonsense. In any case, I am truly grateful. Thank you very much. From the bottom of my heart. I truly mean it.

Right now, I feel like I’m standing at the starting line, not knowing if I’ll trip when the starting shot is fired and not knowing which direction the finish line is. I might be on a track without any water stops. Even if I stray off the path, I just deeply hope that I can keep on running. Except this isn’t the time for me to be talking about this stuff like it doesn’t concern me.

To wrap things up, I would like to express my boundless gratitude to all the people of the publishing company who were directly or indirectly involved and all the people who read this book. That’s all for now.

Nagaru Tanigawa

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