Read The Monogram Murders Online
Authors: Sophie Hannah
Now that the bespectacled man had gone on his
way, there was not a sound to be heard apart from the
occasional bird and my own breathing. Beyond the
houses I saw empty fields and hills in the distance
that, combined with the silence, made me feel
immediately lonely. Cities, of course, can also make a
person feel alone. In London, you look at those who
pass you by and you have no idea what is going on in
their minds. Each one looks utterly closed to you and
mysterious. In villages the same rule applies, except
that you suspect it is the same thing going on in every
mind.
The owner of the King’s Head turned out to be a
Mr. Victor Meakin, who looked to be between fifty
and sixty and had thin gray hair through which the tops
of his ears poked pinkly on both sides. He too seemed
eager to discuss London. “Were you born there, if you
don’t mind my asking, Mr. Catchpool? How many
people live there now? What’s the size of the
population? Is it very dirty there? My aunt went there
once—said it was very dirty. Still, I’ve always
thought I’d like to go one day. I never said so to my
aunt, though—I’d have had an argument from her, God
rest her soul. Does everybody in London have a car of
their own?”
I was relieved that his stream of chatter allowed
me no time to answer. My luck ran out when he got to
the question that really interested him: “What brings
you to Great Holling, Mr. Catchpool? I can’t think
what business you might have here.”
At that point he stopped, and I had no choice but to
answer. “I’m a policeman,” I told him. “From
Scotland Yard.”
“Policeman?” He maintained a determined smile,
but he looked at me now with very different eyes:
hard, probing and disdainful—as if he was
speculating about me and drawing conclusions that
were to my disadvantage. “A policeman,” he said,
more to himself than me. “Now, why would a
policeman be here? An important policeman from
London, too.” Since he seemed not to be asking me
directly, I neglected to reply.
As he carried my cases up the winding wooden
stairs, he stopped three times and turned to peer at me
for no discernible reason.
The room he had allocated to me was agreeably
sparse and chilly—a welcome change from Blanche
Unsworth’s frilly, fringed extravagance. Here,
thankfully, no hot water bottle with a knitted cover
had been laid out for my use. I can’t bear the things;
even the sight of them irks me. The warmest thing in
any bed should always be a person, in my opinion.
Meakin pointed out some features of the room that
I might have spotted myself, such as the bed and the
large wooden cupboard. I tried to respond with the
appropriate mixture of surprise and delight. Then,
because I knew I would have to do so at some point, I
told him the nature of my business in Great Holling,
hoping this would satisfy his curiosity and allow him
to look at me henceforth in a less penetrating way. I
told him about the Bloxham Hotel murders.
His mouth twitched as he listened. It looked rather
as if he was trying not to laugh, though I might have
been mistaken. “Murdered, you say? In a fancy
London hotel? Now, there’s a thing! Mrs. Sippel and
Miss Gransbury, murdered? And Mr. Negus?”
“You knew them, then?” I said, removing my coat
and hanging it up in the cupboard.
“Oh, yes, I knew them.”
“They weren’t friends of yours, I take it?”
“Weren’t friends, weren’t enemies,” said Meakin.
“That’s the best way, when you’ve got an inn to run.
Friends and enemies gets you into trouble. Looks like
it got Mrs. Sippel and Miss Gransbury into trouble.
Mr. Negus too.”
What was it that I could hear in his voice—that
strange emphasis? Was it relish?
“Forgive me, Mr. Meakin, but . . . does it please
you to learn of these three deaths, or am I imagining
it?”
“You are, Mr. Catchpool. Indeed you are.” He
delivered the denial with utmost confidence.
We stared at one another for a moment or two. I
saw eyes that gleamed with suspicion, devoid now of
all warmth.
“You told me some news and I took an interest, is
all I did,” said Meakin. “Just as I’d take an interest in
the tellings of any visitor. It’s only right and proper,
when you’ve got an inn to run. Fancy that, though—
murder!”
I turned away from him and said firmly, “Thank
you for showing me to my room. You’ve been very
helpful.”
“I expect you’ll want to ask me a fair share of
questions, won’t you? The King’s Head’s been mine
since 1911. You’ll find no one better to ask.”
“Oh—yes, of course. Once I’ve unpacked and
eaten, stretched my legs a little.” I didn’t relish the
prospect of speaking to this man at length, but it was
going to be necessary. “One more thing, Mr. Meakin,
and it’s very important: if you would be kind enough
not to pass on what I’ve told you to anyone else, I’d
be grateful.”
“Secret, is it?”
“Not at all, no. It’s simply that I would rather tell
people myself.”
“You’ll be asking questions, will you? There’s not
a body in Great Holling who’ll tell you anything
worth knowing.”
“I’m sure that’s not true,” I said. “You’ve already
offered to talk to me, after all.”
Meakin shook his head. “I don’t believe I have,
Mr. Catchpool. I said you’ll be wanting to ask me, not
that I’d be wanting to answer. I will say this, though
. . .” He pointed a bony, swollen-knuckled index
finger at me. “If you’ve stumbled upon three murders
in your fancy London hotel, and keeping in mind that
you’re a London policeman, you’d be better off asking
your questions there and not here.”
“Are you insinuating that you would like me to
leave, Mr. Meakin?”
“Not at all. Your itinerary is entirely your own
affair. You’ll be welcome at this establishment for as
long as you choose to remain. It’s no concern of
mine.” With that, he turned and left.
I shook my head in puzzlement. It was hard to
reconcile Victor Meakin as he was now with the man
who had greeted me when I first walked into the
King’s Head, who had babbled away merrily about
London and his dirt-averse aunt.
I sat down on the bed, then immediately stood up,
feeling the need of fresh air. If only there had been
somewhere to stay in Great Holling apart from the
King’s Head.
I put on the coat I had taken off a few minutes
earlier, locked my room and descended the stairs.
Victor Meakin was drying beer glasses behind the
bar. He bowed as I entered the room.
In the corner, on either side of a table that was
covered with glasses both full and empty, sat two men
who were intent upon becoming as intoxicated as
possible. Both had perfected the art of swaying while
seated. One of these determined drinkers was a
decrepit old gnome of a chap with a white beard that
brought to mind Father Christmas. The other was well
built and square jawed and could not have been older
than twenty. He was trying to speak to the old man,
but his mouth was too slack from the liquor and he
couldn’t make himself understood. Fortunately, his
drinking companion was in no fit state to listen, so it
was perhaps lucky that it was unintelligible nonsense
that was going to waste and not the finest repartee.
The sight of the young man disturbed me. How had
he ended up at such a low ebb? He looked as if he
was trying on a face that, if he didn’t change his
habits, he would soon be doomed to wear for ever.
“Would you care for a drink, Mr. Catchpool?”
Meakin asked.
“Perhaps later, thank you.” I smiled warmly. I try
to make a point of being as good humored as I can
with those I dislike or don’t trust. It doesn’t always
work, but sometimes they respond in kind. “First, time
to stretch the old legs.”
The inebriated young man rose unsteadily to his
feet. He seemed suddenly angry and said something
that began with the word “No.” The rest was
unintelligible. He staggered past me and out onto the
street. The old man raised his arm—a process that
took him nearly ten seconds—until his finger was
pointing straight at me. “You,” he said.
I had been in the village of Great Holling for less
than an hour, and already two men had pointed rudely
straight at my face. Perhaps among the local folk this
was a sign of welcome, though I doubted it. “I beg
your pardon?” I said.
Father Christmas made sounds that I translated as:
“Yes, you, good fellow. Come and sit down here. In
this chair here. Next to me, here. The chair that the
unfortunate young ne’er-do-well no longer has the
need of, here.”
Under normal circumstances the repetition might
have grated, but since I was engaged in a translation
exercise, I rather welcomed it.
“Actually, I was about to take a stroll around the
village . . .” I started to say, but the old man had made
his mind up that I should do no such thing.
“There’s plenty of time for that later!” he barked.
“Now, you’ll come and sit down, and we’ll have
ourselves a talk.” To my alarm, he began to sing:
“Come and sit down,
Come and sit down,
Mr. Policeman from London Town.”
I looked at Meakin, who kept his eyes on his beer
glasses. Anger emboldened me and I said to him, “I
seem to remember asking you only ten minutes ago not
to discuss my business with anybody.”
“I haven’t said a word.” He did not even have the
good grace to look at me.
“Mr. Meakin, how has this gentleman found out
that I’m a policeman from London if not from your
telling him? Nobody else in the village knows who I
am.”
“You mustn’t go leaping to conclusions, Mr.
Catchpool. That’ll get you nowhere, I expect. I’ve
said not a word about you to a single body. Not a
word.”
He was lying. He knew that I knew, and he didn’t
care.
DEFEATED, I WENT AND sat with the old gnome-like man
in his corner of the inn. There were hops and brasses
on the dark beams all around him, and for a second he
struck me as a strange white-haired creature in an
even stranger nest.
He started to talk as if our conversation were
already in full swing: “. . . not a gentleman but a
ne’er-do-well, and his parents are the same way.
They can’t read, or write their own names, and nor
can he. No Latin to speak of! Twenty years of age and
look at him! When I was his age—ah, but that was
long ago. Time immemorial! I made the best of myself
as a young man, but some take the blessings the Lord
bestowed and squander them all. They don’t realize
that greatness is within the grasp of every man, so
they don’t try to achieve it.”
“Latin, eh?” was all I could manage by way of
reply. Greatness? I counted myself as lucky every
time I avoided a humiliating failure. There was
nothing coarse about the old man’s voice, in spite of
his lumpy claret-colored nose and ale-soaked beard.
Undistorted by drink, his was a voice one might be
pleased to listen to, I thought.
“So, have you done great things, then?” I asked
him.
“I’ve tried, and I’ve succeeded beyond my wildest
dreams.”
“Have you really?”
“Ah, but that was long ago. It doesn’t pay a man to
dream, and the dreams that matter most can never
come true. I didn’t know that when I was young. I’m
glad I didn’t.” He sighed. “What about you, my good
fellow? What will be your great achievement?
Solving the murders of Harriet Sippel, Ida Gransbury
and Richard Negus?”
He spoke as if this were an unworthy goal.
“I never knew Negus, though I saw him once or
twice,” he went on. “Shortly after I arrived in the
village, he left it. One man comes, another man goes,
and both for the very same reason. Both with the
heaviest of hearts.”