The Motel Life (13 page)

‘You still got that dog?’

‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘He seems a real nice one too. All he’s been doing is sleeping and eating. He eats more than any dog I’ve seen.’

‘Those scumbags probably never fed him.’

‘I don’t think they did.’

‘You figured a name yet?’

‘No.’

‘It’s a boy, right?’

‘Yeah,’ I said.

‘I’ll think about a name,’ he said and we fell silent for a time.

‘I’m really getting depressed now, Frank,’ he said finally, and looked out towards the window. ‘I don’t know. If anyone finds out, if the police or anybody finds out, will you get me out of here?’

‘They ain’t gonna find out, but if they do, yeah, I’ll get you out of here.’

‘I just get so damn nervous. The more I’m here the more nervous I get. The TV’s starting to drive me crazy. You find out anything more about the kid?’

‘No,’ I said.

‘Poor fucking guy,’ Jerry Lee said. ‘My whole life seems wrong now.’

‘You’re just in a black cloud now. It’ll pass.’

‘I hope so.’

‘Things go in waves.’

‘I hope they still can.’

‘It will.’

‘You mind sitting here for a while?’

‘No,’ I said, ‘I got no place to be.’

‘Too bad the TV sucks. You think they could get HBO, or at least better cable.’

‘I like the new picture of the Indian chopping the cowboy’s head off with a tomahawk.’

‘I like that one too. How’s Marge?’

‘She’s good.’

‘You feel like telling me a story, Frank?’

‘Right now?’

‘Yeah.’

‘I don’t really feel up to it.’

‘There’s nothing else to do. Nothing’s on until
Perry Mason
and that’s not for another hour.’

‘What kind do you want to hear?’

‘Something okay, something sorta funny, nothing too much.’

‘Well, I’ve been thinking about a new one,’ I said and moved the chair closer to him. He closed his eyes and I paused for a time
looking at him. There was a film of sweat covering his face and the faint smell of soap about him, and his hair was combed and still damp.

‘Way back a long time ago,’ I finally said, ‘our dad when he was eighteen got a job as a salesman in a car dealership as a high school graduation present from his aunt. The same aunt in Idaho, I don’t know if you remember her, Aunt Bernie. The aunt I already told you about. The one that used to give him
Penthouse
and
Hustler
and
Playboy
for slashing tires. Anyway, she had connections and got Jimmy a job in Reno. He took the bus down here and rented a house and started working. The place he worked was like old Earl Hurley’s place. A used car lot. The uncle got him a job working for Ike Linfield, the owner of Used Car Magic.

‘He began as a part-time salesman, but within two months he had the top sales figures, and Ike let the only other salesman they had go, so that Jimmy could help run the place.

‘Then one day this lady, Iris, walked onto Ike’s lot wearing tight black shorts, a red tank top that said “Wonder Woman,” and black spiked high heels. She was looking for a convertible Ford Mustang. Ike had two sitting on the lot, a 1962 and a ’65.

‘So Jimmy walked her to the two convertibles. She knew how to work on cars so she popped open the hood and looked at things, moved some wires around, did a couple other things, then crawled underneath it in her little outfit. When she was done she wanted to take the ’62 for a test drive.

‘Jimmy went into the office, got the keys to the ’62, and said, “The woman of my dreams just walked in. Take a look at her, Ike.” Ike took a pair of binoculars out of his desk drawer and focused them on her. He looked at her for a time, then said, “You’re learn
ing, Jimmy. Remember, let the words trickle down your tongue like they’re the fruits of Jesus.” See, Ike was a Jesus freak. He drank and smoked and cheated on his wife, but he also really loved God.

‘So Jimmy walked back out to Iris. He gave Iris the keys, she started it up and took them out on the road.

‘Jimmy watched her skinny white legs as they pushed on the clutch, hammered down on the brake, and eased into the gas. Iris watched Jimmy as Jimmy watched her. She smiled.

‘“You’re cute,” she said. “Maybe we should go out some time.” Then she moved her legs slightly further apart. Jimmy looked at her face. He thought of what Ike said. “Hell yeah, we’re gonna. I’m gonna blow your mind, Iris.”

‘“Is that so?” she said.

‘She pulled the car over on the side of the road and just like that, they began kissing.

‘Iris bought the car with cash, hundreds and fifties. It was the first sale of the week. Iris had her hand down the back of Jimmy’s pants when Ike told Jimmy to take the rest of the day off and spend it with her: “Let Iris take the controls for a while, Jimmy. Don’t worry about me, I’m gonna sit back and watch some TV.
The 700 Club’s
on in an hour. Enjoy the rest of the day.”

‘An hour later and Iris had the ’62 up to ninety as they headed east towards the desert. They had brought with them a tub of Kentucky Fried Chicken, a sleeping bag, a tent, and a twelve- pack of cold beer. They finally stopped on a dirt road miles from the freeway. Jimmy ate the fried chicken while Iris stood on the hood of her new car and shot lizards with her stainless steel Winchester .357.

‘“You sure are good with that gun, Iris,” Jimmy said as she picked up a part of a lizard with a stick.

‘“My mother told me the best defense is a good offense.”

‘“Your mom was one smart woman.”

‘Iris dropped the stick and the piece of lizard and said, “My mother taught me how to survive in this world. My mother said that each of us is like an M&M in a blender full of ice cream. We all try to avoid getting chopped up. We do most anything to avoid getting sliced, but in the end most of us get the chop and become nothing more than a part of the milk shake. With no difference, no will, all the pressure of the world beating us down, making us like everyone else. But I ain’t giving up. My mother taught me the basic three words of life. Good handgun knowledge. And believe me, it really does help a girl out.”

‘Jimmy threw his piece of chicken out into the desert and lay down on the hood and Iris took his pants off and got on top of him. As they did it she shot the gun over his head and Jimmy said it was the best experience in his life. The way that gun scared the hell out of him made him last for hours.

‘The next morning Iris got them back out on the freeway. They were heading to Reno to get married. He had his hands in her pants and she had the Ford up to a hundred.

‘They made a quick stop at Jimmy’s apartment, picked up his burgundy ruffled suit and bell-bottom pants, and drove on to Iris’s house.

‘She had a one-room house with a Great Dane/Russian Wolfhound cross named Biff. When they walked in, Iris pushed Jimmy on the bed and took him. He knew then that he’d found something more than incredible, he’d found the meaning to his life.

‘When they finished she told him she was gonna take a shower and then they’d get married. Jimmy was on the bed drawing imaginary hearts on her sheets when the police broke in and screamed, “DRUG RAID.” They handcuffed Jimmy naked to the bedpost while they searched the house.

‘They found half a pound of marijuana in a bowling bag, a pound of plastic explosives in a shoe box, an M-16 in her closet, and three grenades under the couch.

‘The cops handcuffed Iris and threw her on the bed next to Jimmy. They were both naked. Iris said, “I just picked this boy up, he don’t know a thing about what I’ve been doing. He’s just a man I found yesterday, a man who would have changed my life and led me down the path of righteousness. He’s the only man that understands me! And most of all he’s innocent, goddamnit! Let him go, you cocksuckers!”

‘“Fuck you, lady,” the police yelled.

‘“You think you’re funny, don’t you? You fucking assholes! A woman has a right to defend herself, and a woman has the right to enjoy herself!”

‘As they took her away, Jimmy screamed, “I swear to God I’ll bust you out! I’m your M&M, and I’m gonna be the M&M that makes it through.”

‘She began crying and yelled, “I love you, Jimmy. I love you so deep it hurts. It hurts so bad I think I’m dying. Take care of Biff. You’re forever mine! Goddamnit, come hurry up and set me free!”

‘Four days later Iris was getting a prison-issue haircut from an inmate when the woman stabbed her five times in the neck. Jimmy had already begun a plan to break her out, and had moved his things into her small house when he heard the news
that she lay dead in a barbershop chair with a pair of scissors stuck in her throat. Jimmy was sad as hell ’cause he really loved Iris. Even a year on he was sure he would never fall in love again. It was a hard time, he was sad and lonelier than he’d ever been. And then one day our mother, just out of high school, walked onto the dusty lot of Used Car Magic. He sold her a two- door Toyota, and once again as they filled out the paperwork, old Ike took him aside. “Jimmy,” he said, “I think this might be the next gal for you!” Then he gave him a hundred-buck bonus and the rest of the day off. The End.’

Jerry Lee laughed. ‘That’s a hell of a sad story, Frank, but I like it. That damn woman, she was something. That’s one sick picture. With a pair of scissors sticking out of her neck, blood everywhere. You imagine the crazed look in the barber lady’s eyes when she was cutting Iris’s hair. And poor Iris on a barber chair like that. With some crazy lady standing over you, and you don’t even know it. I liked the part about fucking while she’s shooting off a gun. I’d be scared she’d shoot me, but it’s a nice image. I’d try it. If it was Iris pulling the trigger I’d do it.’

‘I might have Jimmy and Biff, the dog, go somewhere next, but I’m not sure. Maybe something to do with aliens. Some sort of man and his dog adventure.’

‘Too bad Iris had to die. In my mind she’s still alive.’

‘I didn’t want her to die,’ I said, ‘but she just did. Maybe she’ll come back somehow.’

‘I hope so. You know, every time now that you tell a story, the cool girl dies at the end. Always. Never changes. Last time her parachute didn’t open, and the time before that she got caught on the rocks and the air in her scuba tank ran out before you could
get to her. And the time before that the sand people, or whatever they were, tortured her to death.’

‘Yeah,’ I said.

‘It’s ’cause of Annie James, I bet,’ Jerry Lee said proudly. ‘Hell, at least you’ve been in love, you know? And no matter what you say, that girl really did like you. All she ever did was talk about you. Marge is the only one for me, I think, and she’s just a picture I draw. It sure doesn’t feel like love with me and Polly Flynn. If it does at all it’s just when we’re fucking. I sometimes feel like I love her then. Never anytime else, though. Not hardly ever.

‘But then I even felt like that when I used to fuck that fat old lady when we were staying down at the Silver State. Nancy. Even with her, when I had to pay her twenty dollars and she was almost too drunk to walk. Even then when I was about to let go, I felt like I wanted to marry her. I even told her that once. Right when I let go. “Marry me,’ cause I love you,” I said.’

Jerry Lee began laughing

‘I remember her,’ I said and laughed.

‘She wasn’t much,’ he said, still laughing, ‘but right then, I swear to God I could have really married her.’

20

I LEFT THE HOSPITAL
when Jerry Lee fell asleep. The dog was outside, almost frozen, waiting for me by the entrance. Snow was falling. I stopped at a pay phone and told Tommy I needed to see him and then went to the Eldorado Casino, got an order of chicken chow mein to go, and finished the walk home.

The night clerk wasn’t around when I got to the hotel so I let the dog walk up the steps and into my room on his own. I locked the door behind us, turned on the radio, plugged in the box heater, and sat at the small table by the window and ate what I could. I fed the dog a can of food, and when he was done, I took an old comb I had and tried to comb his hair. It was so matted that I grabbed my pocket knife and cut off most of the trouble spots. Then I took off my clothes, grabbed a towel, soap, and shampoo, and the dog and I went down to the bathroom.

He didn’t seem to mind much when I put him in the shower.
The warm water hit him, and when it did he just lay down on the drain and licked the tile walls. I soaped him up and rinsed him off a couple times. I did the same for myself, then sat down and let the water run over me while I petted him and tried to figure out what to do.

When I got back to my room I turned on the TV and got dressed. It was not much later that I went to the store and bought a six-pack of beer. I was drinking that and listening to the radio when there was knocking on the door. I called out to see who it was, and when Tommy yelled his name I stood up and let him in. He sat at my table and I gave him a beer.

‘I was just at the hospital visiting your brother,’ he said.

‘I was there a couple hours ago,’ I said. ‘He seem all right?’

‘I don’t know. He seemed the same as yesterday and the same as the day before. But he asked me for money. Said he might have to leave town. What’s up with that?’