The New Rule: (The Casual Rule 2) (30 page)

“Julia,” he says quietly, shaking his head minutely.

“Ben, I miss you.”

“Julia, we need to talk.”

“I don’t want to talk tonight. Tomorrow is for talking. Tonight, I just want to love you. Let me love you.”

“How can you love me after the way I’ve…”

I put my finger over his lip. “I don’t qualify when I love you. I always love you, even at your darkest. I can’t stop the way I feel.”

“I have things I need to say.”

“Say them tomorrow. Love me. Please Ben, just love me. I need you.”

He releases my hand and caresses my cheek lightly with his fingertips. Tracing my bottom lip back and forth, I kiss the soft pads of his fingertips as they brush over my lips. He looks conflicted and I don’t know why. In my heart, I know this is what we need to bring us back to wherever we’ve been. I take a tiny step closer to him, closing the gap between us until our chests are touching. I can feel his heart beating wildly.

He wants this. I know he does. Looking down at me, he exhales a shaky breath. He glides his finger across my jawline then down my neck, around the curve of my shoulder then trails his fingertip across the top of my breasts peeking out of my shirt.

A low whimper escapes from the back of my throat. His soft touch sends an electric charge throughout my body. I crave this. I need this.

He turns my face up with his index finger until our gazes meet. He stares at me, looking like he’s debating what to do next then he cups my face in his hands and swoops in, our mouths crashing together.

Pushing me up against the refrigerator, he grinds his body against mine. I hear the bottles on the inside of the refrigerator door clanking together. He kisses me passionately like our lives depended on it.

I’m starting to think they do.

I slide my hands up his chest, past his neck until they’re fisting his hair, pulling him down to me. I want him like I’ve never wanted anything before. I need to be close to him… if I could climb inside him, I would. He grabs my ass, lifts me up and kisses me hard. I wrap my legs around his waist as he carries me to his bedroom.

Sliding his tongue between my parted lips, he kisses me tenderly then gently lowers me until my feet are on the floor. He takes a small step back and we face each other. He lifts his hand and caresses my cheek; I close my eyes and soak in his touch.

I open my eyes and gaze at him. He slowly traces my lips with his index finger. I press a delicate kiss on his fingertip. He glides his finger down my neck, lazily skimming across the nape of my neck to my shoulder and across my collarbone. My body warms at his gentle touch. I’m getting wetter and wetter with each arousing caress.

One by one, he slowly unbuttons my shirt then slides it down the length of my arm until my shirt is off and in a pile at our feet. He skims his fingertip down my neck to the silky neckline of my bra, tracing the tops of the cups, lightly brushing against my breasts. I inhale deeply, close my eyes briefly and shutter when his fingertip makes contact with my skin.

He reaches around me, unbuttons and unzips my skirt, pulling it down below my hips until it’s in a pile on the floor. I kick off my shoes and step out of my skirt, standing in front of him in my bra and panties.

We gaze at each other longingly and I feel the magic between us, that extraordinary, undeniable, intimate bond we share. The way he’s looking at me, with so much love in his eyes, I know he feels it too.

Grabbing the hem of his T-shirt, I pull it over his head. I splay my fingers across the tight, hard ripples of muscle on his bare chest, my fingernails making tiny circles on his small patch of chest hair. His skin is warm and perfect.

I take a small step back and pull the drawstring on his sweats, untying it. I grab the waistline, my fingers sliding under the elastic band. Ben takes in a shaky breath when my fingers gently skim across his happy trail, brushing over the tip of his erection.

I pull his sweats down past his muscular legs. He steps out of them, kicking it off to the side. My arms reach behind my back and I unhook my bra. Slowly, I push my bra straps down and watch it fall carelessly to the floor.

He stands enthralled, admiring me. He lifts his hand and cups my breast, stroking his thumb across my hardened nipple.

“You are stunning,” he whispers.

He falls to his knees, hooking a finger on either side of my panties. Leisurely, he pulls my panties down, helping me step out of them, never taking his eyes off me.

I love when he undresses me. It’s sexy and hot and so intimate.

Feather-light kisses trail up my leg, his hands caressing my skin, goosebumps prickling up from his touch.

“Beautiful, so beautiful,” he murmurs as he continues to kiss up my legs until he reaches my sex. A thrill runs through me in anticipation. He kisses my stomach, his arm reaching up and skimming down the side of my naked body. He presses a delicate kiss on my swollen folds but doesn’t linger there. I moan softly at his touch. He stands, reaching across and cups my face, kissing me, fervently claiming my mouth, his tongue finding mine… hungry, intoxicating.

Perfect.

“Ben,” I whisper. It’s all I can say. I feel more than just lust and desire … it’s need… a deep emotional need for this man, for this connection.

I grab the waistband of his boxer briefs and bend down to the floor, pulling them down until he steps out of them. I lean back slightly and admire his naked body… his rock hard chest, his muscular thighs, perfect calves. That fucking ‘V’ leads the way to his stiff, thick erection and luscious patch of pubic hair.

He is male perfection and magnificently mine.

I lower myself on the edge of the bed then lie down, never breaking eye contact. Ben stands above me, watching me.

“You are the most incredible woman I have ever met,” he says with a look of love and utter sincerity in his eyes. I take a deep breath and return the same look of love.

He joins me on the bed, lying next to me. Pulling me close to him, his hand skims across my warm, sensitive skin and explores my naked body. The soft touch of his hand is my heaven—pure and bliss. He’s taking his time, his fingertips lightly brushing against my breasts again, his thumb grazing across my hardened nipples, as he relishes in what’s his.

His hand travels down my side, passing my hips, between my legs until he reaches my thigh. Gently he moves my legs apart, caressing the hypersensitive skin of my inner thighs then slides a finger between my wet, swollen folds.

“Ohhh,” I moan. My back arches up, reacting to his seductive touch as it always does.

I’m already on the edge when he begins to massage my clit with his fingers. I squirm, wriggle, and melt into the bed at the same time. The heat of his breath against my skin is fueling my ache for release.

I’ve missed this, his hands on my body, the way he looks at me, lustful and cherishing at the same time.

My hips sway to our own music, gyrating, thrusting up to meet him. I’m all sensation, tingling as he continues to stroke my clit, making big circles, wet and slick, until tremors pulsate through my body. He sinks two fingers inside me, awakening and sending sparks to my nerve endings. I stiffen briefly, and wild spasms take over, a frenzied explosion of pure pleasure and ecstasy.

I moan in surrender. My hand fisting the sheets on either side of me, my body revels in my orgasm, twisting and turning, losing all control.

I swear I see stars.

I turn my head and smile adoringly at him as my breathing calms.

“You look so beautiful like that,” he murmurs, watching me float back down from heaven on earth.

Slowly, he climbs on top of me, parting my legs wide with his. The weight of his body pressed against mine is exquisite. His chest hair tickles my skin. He kisses me hard and passionately then stares intensely into my eyes.

“Take all of me. Give me all of you,” I whisper, raking my nails slowly down his back.

He pulls one of my knees up and slowly plunges deep inside me, joining his body to mine, filling me… claiming me.

He moans; a deep, sexy moan from the back of his throat that sets me on fire.

He begins to really move, thrusting his hardness inside me, and rotating his hips, grinding his body into mine. He’s making love to me like a man who truly loves a woman; from the softness of her curves to the depths of her soul. He’s taken all of me and he’s giving me all of him back.

It overwhelms me how this closeness we share, this most intimate moment together could be so touching, so unbelievably lovely. Almost spiritual. I have missed this man.

His hand tenses around my leg and I know he’s there. I arch up to meet his thrust.

“Oh, Julia,” he groans, his body stiffening then he loses control and comes inside me, finding his own release.

He leans on his forearms looking down at me.

“Know that I love you,” he whispers, his expression serious.

“I do,” I whisper back, giving him a small smile.

He leans on his arms to move next to me when I wrap my legs around him and hold him in place.

“Don’t. Stay inside me.” I tighten my legs around him. “I’m not ready to let you go.”

He nods minutely, holding the weight of his body from crushing me. He closes his eyes then leans down and kisses me tenderly.

Chapter 18

Slowly, I pry my eyes open, praying it wasn’t all a dream and Ben will still be next to me. My heart beats quickly, and I smile when I see him lying here, sleeping peacefully. Stretching my arm across the bed, I touch his warm skin to make sure he’s real.

I think back to last night. I have never felt so loved and cherished… or such passion. I know our problems are far from over, but it’s clear from last night, we’re back on track. And oh, the way that man makes love to me. My stomach flutters just thinking about his touch, his kisses, and the weight of his body on mine. I fight the urge to peek under the covers and admire him in all his glorious nakedness again.

Oh, fuck it. He’s mine to gawk at and once you get the pent-up sexual frustration uncorked, the perv that lurks within is bound to make an appearance. I lift the blanket and sheet and take a peek. That’s one fine specimen of naked man there. Very fine indeed. And he’s mine. I love that he’s mine.

I’m tempted to wake him with little kisses and make love all morning… and afternoon… and night. There’s a lot of time to make up for. I don’t want to waste a minute.

But he looks so untroubled and tranquil lying here. Since I don’t have a clue if he’s slept at all while we’ve been apart, I’ll leave him alone. There’s plenty of time to make up for missed fun and games.

If first thing in the morning sex is off the table, we might as well eat.

I slide out of bed, careful not to disturb him. Stealing a T-shirt from his dresser drawer, I slip it over my head then sneak into the bathroom to brush my teeth and freshen up. Once my breath is minty fresh, I tiptoe out of the bedroom, taking one last glance back at Ben.

God, he’s beautiful.

So, this is what happy feels like? It’s been so long I was afraid I forgot. I let out a very unladylike yawn and a long stretch, getting some of the bendiness back to my body.

Strolling into the living room, I open the curtains to let the sunshine in.

“Good morning, daisies. Aww, looks like some of your petals fell. Don’t worry, you still look pretty to me. Incidentally, that position looks familiar,” I whisper to the intertwined Ben and Julia daisies soaking up the sun on the small folding table in front of one of the windows.

I make way to the kitchen when I realize I’m humming a James Brown mash-up between “Sex-Machine” and “I Feel Good”. Seems appropriate, all things considered, so I run with it.

I grab two frying pans and place them on the stove. Opening the refrigerator, I take four eggs and a package of bacon. No, no… breakfast is for him. I put the real bacon that tastes like actual food back and take out the package of turkey bacon that tastes like strips of cardboard he keeps for himself. I hope he appreciates the things I sacrifice in the name of love.

Turning the knobs on the stove, I heat up the pans. I crack the eggs into a bowl and beat them. If there’s one thing I’m confident in cooking, it’s fluffy scrambled eggs. I open the package of faux bacon and lay six pieces neatly across one pan. I’m not sure how to cook turkey bacon. It looks like a dog treat. There’s no fat to crisp up, so I wing it.

Searching the pantry for some non-stick cooking spray, I find an opened bag of marshmallows. That’s the Ben I fell in love with, the guy who makes toasted marshmallows on his stovetop just to make me smile. And that’s the Ben I know is still with me. Last night proved he’s still here.

I put on a pot of coffee, then spray the unused pan with the spray and pour in the eggs. Grabbing a spatula, I wait for the eggs to set, then pull them across the pan with the spatula. It’s all in the pulling. No one can pull like me.

My naughty thoughts drift back to Mr. Hot and Naked sleeping in bed. There’s something attached to him I wouldn’t mind pulling. It’s amazing how once you get back in the sex saddle, all the inappropriate innuendo comes back so naturally.

After flipping the turkey bacon over, I drop two slices of whole wheat bread in the toaster. My eggs are done to light and fluffy perfection. I think the turkey bacon is done. It’s brown. It’s crispy-like. It looks a little like beef jerky on a diet. That’s good enough for me.

I’m reaching for two plates just when the toast pops up, startling me. I turn to look and see Ben, in a pair of dark blue pajama pants and a white T-shirt leaning against the kitchen entrance, watching me.

A broad grin splashes across my face. “Good morning, Handsome. I was going to bring you breakfast in bed.”

He walks over to me and grabs me, practically knocking me off my feet and kisses me tenderly. I melt into the kiss. God, I love this man.

“Mmm, that was nice,” I breathe, recovering my equilibrium. “I’ve missed those kisses.”

He leans back, still with his arms around me; his dark brown eyes focused on my face… studying me. He blinks a few times, snapping himself out of his staring and releases me. I smile warmly at him then turn around and grab the spatula to plate our breakfast.