The Next Big Thing (28 page)

“Do we embarrass you, Kat
rina?”

“No, it’s nothing like that—”

“Because I’d say you’ve done a pretty fine job of embarrassing the family. The things you’ve been talking about on national television! Sexual matters and whatnot!”

“Mom, I’m sorry,” I said. “What can I say? Sex sells.”

“Yes, but does it have to be
your
sex?” She continued to chastise me for my “upsetting” behavior.

When Zaidee finally came on the line to inform us that the call was over, I breathed a tremendous sigh of relief.

I’d never been so glad to see five minutes end.  
 

***

 
I was unable to focus on anything but Nick.

I weighed in at only 197 pounds, but he was all I talked about, thought about, dreamed about. And I was driving everybody mad.

“What the hell is so appealing about him, anyway?” Janelle asked me as we folded laundry in our room. “Because I don’t see it. Although yesterday Regan and Luisa were saying how hot he was.”

“I think with those two it’s partly to do with his money.” It had never been about that for me. “Although, in actuality, he’s not rich, his parents are.”

“I’m not rich, my parents are,” Alyssa mimicked as she came into the room. “Hello! If your parents are rich then, ipso facto,
you’re
rich.”

“What do you want?” I asked. I was in no mood to put up with her.

“Nothing much, just thought I’d come see what you two losers are doing,” she said, brushing aside Janelle’s laundry and taking a seat on her bed. I ignored her dig. She opened her mouth wide, giving an exaggerated yawn. “So, what does your boy toy Nick do that makes him so much money?”

I bristled. He wasn’t my boy
toy.
He’d barely even been my boy
friend.
“Nick’s the fashion editor for
Status.
It’s a swank British men’s magazine, kind of like
Esquire.
”

“I know what it is,”
Alyssa said nonchalantly. “What I meant was, how does Nick have the money for a designer wardrobe? ’Cause magazine pay is barely above slave wages.”

“It’s not Nick, remember?” I said. “His
parents
are rich.”

“How much do you think they have?”

Uh-oh.
I could see the wheels turning. “I have no idea,” I told her. “I know they have a couple of vacation homes. Or, holiday estates, I think he called them.”

“It might be interesting to know. Maybe you could ask him for me sometime? If you guys happen to talk in the near future,” she added.

“No problem at all,” I told her in my best sugary sweet voice.

“That girl is such a royal pain,” I said, as soon as
Alyssa had skipped out the door in search of someone else to torment.

“You realize she’s going to make a play for Nick,” said Janelle, who had been listening quietly the entire time.

“Let her.” I shrugged. “She won’t get very far. Alyssa’s pretty, but she doesn’t measure up to his impossible standards. No one does.”

Chapter Twenty-Three

“For today’s competition we’ve decided to mix things up,” Jagger began. It was the following morning and all nine of us—the original
From Fat to Fabulous
contestants plus Nick, Matt, and Briana—were milling around in the backyard. Three heart-shaped booths had been set up in a row. An enormous flat-screen TV sat beside them. “Since we now have three additional guests in the house, we thought it was only fair they be allowed to compete,” Jagger continued.

“So I present you with today’s challenge, Match Made in Heaven. This revealing competition will test your compatibility. You’re going to be paired up into three teams of two: Janelle and Matt, Regan and Briana, and Kat and Nick. Your success—or failure—is directly linked to how well you know your partner.” Jagger quickly outlined the rules for Match Made in Heaven, which sounded like a slightly altered version of
The Newlywed Game.
“You’ll begin by filling out surveys on a variety of unusual and enticing topics. Then we’ll meet back here for a quick quiz. The goal is to guess your partner’s answers. Every time you get one correct, you earn five points. At the end of the game, the couple with the most points wins!”

“Why, you don’t say!” I jumped in sarcastically. Jagger gave me a small laugh. “Today’s prize is going to be a little different, a little outrageous . . . but more on that in a minute.”

Briana threw her hands up in the air and let out a squeal. She turned and stuck her tongue out at Luisa. “Suckers! Betcha wish you had someone to partner with!”

Jagger held up his hand. “Not so fast. You didn’t
really
think we’d leave three of our finest ladies out, now did you? Who do you think wrote the questions for Match Made in Heaven?”

Regan gasped. “No!”

Jagger gave her a sideways glance.

“Oh, yes. Earlier this morning we summoned
Alyssa, Maggie, and Luisa into the Confession Chamber where, with the help of our producers, they crafted twenty entertaining questions for Match Made in Heaven. Their goal was to stump you guys. Because every time you get an answer wrong, Alyssa, Luisa, and Maggie will earn five points. At the end of the game, if they’ve earned more than you guys, they’ll be taking home the ultimate prizes.”

He gave us a minute to digest this information. Then Janelle, Regan, and I were led back into the house to complete our questionnaires while the rest of the group remained outside.

“Act fast,” Jagger cautioned. “We’re going to get started in just a few minutes.”

I had no idea what kind of answers Nick would give, or how well he’d be able to deduce mine. I sat down on the living room couch and quickly answered the questions, which ranged from humorous to bizarre.
Do you believe in ghosts? How old were you when you got your first kiss? What is your favorite candy bar? What’s the bravest thing you’ve ever done? Who is the bossiest person you know? What’s the juiciest piece of gossip you’ve ever spread?

About ten minutes later, Jagger resurfaced and collected our surveys. “All right, gals, it’s show time!” he announced, escorting us out into the backyard. “Please have a seat in the love booth next to your partner,” he instructed.

Love booth?
I groaned inwardly as I made my way over to Nick.

“Hi,” I said shyly, squeezing in beside him.

“Nice to see you,” he mumbled, without turning to face me.

“Quiet on the set!” Jagger ordered. “I need everyone to sit tight until I give the command.”

A few production assistants I’d never seen before scurried about, frantically adjusting the lighting equipment and microphones. Gigi Rucker came over, bringing Alyssa, Luisa, and Maggie with her. They sat down in folding chairs facing us.

“Gotta love the scenery,”
Alyssa said, eyeing Nick. Jagger quickly shushed her.

After what seemed like an eternity
, the game finally began. “Up until this point all of our challenges have had a cash reward. Today we’re getting a little bit crazy. This time we’re offering you something sweeter!”

He dramatically swung around, pointing his finger at the flat-screen TV. On cue, the television sprang to life. A slick, black tire rolled into view, then the camera cut back to reveal a silver Subaru Impreza cruising down the highway. It swung effortlessly around the sharp curves while a voiceover informed us about the car’s mighty horsepower and turbo-charged engine.

“And this gorgeous car could be yours—”

“If the price is right!” I
cracked, unable to resist.

Jagger snickered. “Try if the
points
are right. Earn the highest score today and not only will you each win a sleek new Subaru Impreza, but you’ll also get this!” Jagger announced, as the TV suddenly switched to a gorgeous shot of soft sandy beaches and palm trees. “An all-expenses paid, seven-night stay in Maui!”

There’s an enticing idea. Reward a group of overweight girls with a trip to the beach.

“And if that wasn’t good enough,” Jagger continued, “you’ll also win a pair of Schwinn mountain bikes!” he announced, as the image of a man and woman cycling along a dirt trail came onto the screen.

Ah, yes. Exercise equipment.
For the life of me, I couldn’t understand why they were being so game-showy. As soon as the video montage ended, a production assistant came running over with a stack of large red cards. “We’ve put your survey answers on here,” she informed me. “Hold these up when Jagger cues you. Until then, keep them down here.” She leaned around and gestured toward a pocket that had been built into the side of the seat. They’re numbered on the back so
make sure
you don’t screw up the order.” She turned and gave a stack to Nick. “Same deal,” she said, and then hurried off to distribute cards to the rest of the players.

Once everyone had been accommodated, the game commenced. “We’re going to run through the survey responses,” Jagger said. “The goal is to read their minds, if you will. Predict how they’ve answered. Remember, every correct answer brings you five points closer to winning that cool new ride and Hawaiian adventure. Janelle, I’ll start with you.” He strolled over to her. “If Matt could take a dream vacation anywhere in the world, where would he go?”

Janelle smiled. “That’s easy. Thailand,” she said. “Matt’s obsessed. He has a shelf of travel books about Southeast Asia.”

Jagger cued Matt, and he held up one of his red cards. It read
Thailand.
“Five points for the ex-lovebirds!” Jagger announced and a bell began dinging. “And Regan? Where would Briana go on a dream vacation?”

“The beach,” she said automatically. “Be more specific.”

“I don’t know . . . the Bahamas.”

Briana produced her card, which said
Bahamas.

Jagger turned to face me
and my mind went blank. As far as I knew Nick had already visited some of the world’s greatest cities—Madrid, Rome, New York. Plus, I had no clue whether his ideal holiday would be lounging on a beach, traipsing through a museum, or skiing in the Alps.

“
Cannes,” I finally said, figuring it was as good a guess as any. He loved movies and movie stars. Perhaps he’d want to go there for the legendary film festival?

Nick let out a huge sigh, and pulled out his card. “
South Africa,” he snarled. “What were you thinking? I can’t stand the French.”

Jagger cleared his throat. “Moving right along. If your partner could use a voodoo doll on anyone who would it be and why?”

“Sammy, because he screwed Matt over in a business deal,” Janelle answered correctly.

“Darlene, who stole Briana’s fiancé last March,” Regan said, bagging another five points.

I had no idea who Nick wanted to prick with a voodoo doll. I scrambled for a minute.

“Can I say myself?” I joked.

Jagger shook his head.

“Uh, okay then, Johnny Depp?”

Jagger raised his eyebrows. “That’s an unusual choice, Kat. Elaborate please.”

I knew it was lame but I couldn’t think of anything else. “Nick’s section in the magazine got cut because his coworker landed a last-minute interview with Johnny Depp.”

Nick laughed. “She’s right, you know.” He held up his card. I was dumbstruck. Of all the questions I expected to ace, that wasn’t one of them.

“Good job, guys! You’re successfully holding the single gals at bay. So far they’ve only earned five points. Next question . . . what’s your partner’s most unusual talent?”

“I’d have to go with knitting,” Janelle said. “It sounds weird, but Matt’s amazingly good at it. He makes the best sweaters.” Matt held up his card, once again matching her.

“Dancing,” Regan said, glossing over the fact that she was supposed to name something unusual.

“Freak,” Briana said, “you know my most unusual talent is being able to tie a cherry stem into a knot with my tongue.”

Jagger posed the question to me and I was stumped. “His knowledge about shoes,” I said sheepishly. “
Correct,” Nick said, holding up a card that read
shoes.
We continued on for a few minutes, with the questions growing more personal.

“When was the last time your partner cried?” Jagger began. Janelle bit her lip. “When his mother died last Easter,” she said, and Matt confirmed it.

Regan goofed the question, wrongly guessing Briana had last cried over a bad breakup with some guy named Gibbo. When my turn came I tensed. In my entire life I had never seen a man cry. My father was hardly the type to let loose his emotions—unless, of course, the emotions were anger or agitation—and none of my guy friends had so much as shed a tear in front of me. Did tears come easily to Nick, or was he one of those macho types who cried once a decade?

“Nick cried when his grandmother died,” I fudged. I had no idea if this was true; in all our phone conversatio
ns we had never discussed grandparents.

Nick groaned. “I cried when someone scratched my Jaguar in Boots’s car park.”
Jaguar? Boots?
He’d lost me.

“You drive a Jag?” I asked, stunned.

“It belongs to Dad,” he explained briskly. “I borrow it from time to time.”

“The boot’s the front of the car, right?”

“No, the boot is what you Americans call the trunk. And that’s not what I meant. I’m referring to an accident I had in the
parking lot
of Boots, the chemist. It’s quite a famous chain throughout Europe,” he said, exasperated.

“All right, Janelle,” Jagger said, cutting off our conversation, “name the last time in Matt’s life that he was truly afraid.”

“Poor Mattie. He had a panic attack while trapped in an elevator in downtown Indianapolis,” she said, patting him on the arm.

Matt
snapped his fingers. “I didn’t think you’d remember that!” he said, looking truly impressed. “So I didn’t put it.” He held up a card that said “Car accident in 2004.” It was the first time they’d gotten a question wrong.

Regan went next, correctly guessing that Briana had been terrified when she rolled her SUV on the highway.

When it came my turn, I used the only thing I could think of. “Nick was afraid of flying out here.”

Nick pulled out his card and held it up. “On the flight from
London to Los Angeles,” he said. “I’m terrified of flying.” He smiled at me, obviously impressed. It had been a total guess, one that I had cursed myself for as soon as I’d written it down. How could a man who was so into international travel have a fear of flying? But, as it turned out, I had guessed correctly.

I watched as
Alyssa and Luisa exchanged glances. There set of questions weren’t going over as poorly as they’d hoped. We were all scoring very well – even Nick and me. In fact, we were only one spot behind Janelle and Matt for first place.

Jagger moved on to the next question. “Who in Nick’s life is most critical of him?”

I paused. It was a tough call.

“His father,” I guessed.

Nick sighed in exasperation. “Not even close,” he said, holding up his card. It read
My sister, Sophie.

Nick had a
sister
? In all our phone conversations and e-mails he had never once mentioned her. How could a major thing like that never have come up?

From across the yard I could see
Alyssa smiling, likely thrilled that I had just given her another five points. I sank down in my seat to brood.

The competition continued on and, before long,
Janelle and Matt had secured a comfortable lead. Despite a few lucky breaks at the beginning, I flubbed my way through a series of questions, wrongly guessing on such topics as whether Nick had ever cheated on a test (
no
) and whether he’d had a one-night stand (
yes
).

But I couldn’t ignore the fact that I’d missed some of the biggest questions. My God, he has a sister and I didn’t even know! Once we’d finished going through our partners’ answers, Jagger began questioning Matt, Briana, and Nick. “