The Night Beat, From the Necropolis Enforcement Files (37 page)

“Thanks,” I murmured as I plowed through, the others right behind me.

Chapter 53

The first thing I noticed was that there were no people inside the building. That was nice in that I wasn’t going to run some innocent down. What wasn’t nice was likely to be the answer to the question of where all the people actually were.

The church wasn’t empty, however. There were a variety of beings there. I recognized most of them. I had no idea if being hit by a big Hummer would cause any of the major minions damage, but I was willing to give it the old college try.

I aimed for Hitler. He was unmistakable -- short, military garb, ridiculous little moustache, funky-ugly haircut, overbearing and supercilious attitude. Not only did he look exactly like he had when he’d been running the Nazi Party, but he was in the center of the dais, pretty much on the exact spot where I figured Johnson did his preaching.

Hitler had an eerie glow around him and he was waving his hands about. I was pretty sure he was in the middle of casting a huge spell. I wasn’t sure if it was part of the spell already cast or a new one, but decided not to care.

The Hummer rolled over the comfy stadium-type chairs this place had instead of pews. It was a bumpy ride, but I was sort of high on adrenaline, so I didn’t notice all that much. I took in the rest of the scene, though, just in case.

Apollyon and Abaddon were flanking Hitler. They looked similar -- huge no-longer-angelic wings, meaning they looked more bat-like than feathered. Their faces were beautiful, but distorted by eons of hatred and evil, so they were both compelling and repulsive at the same time. They stood a good ten feet high, and they glowed an ugly, dark red. Apollyon held a flaming sword while Abaddon had a Hellfired crossbow.

Abaddon took aim, but not towards me. I realized he was shooting towards the car Jack was driving. Well, that wasn’t acceptable.

I spun the Hummer so it skidded towards the three minions on the dais. It had the double advantage of clearly causing Hitler to stumble and messing up Abaddon’s aim. It had the disadvantage of landing my door right next to Apollyon, who took the opportunity to slice through the metal like it was butter.

Some things are instinctive, and some beings react more instinctively than others. As far as undeads go, you don’t get more instinct-heavy than a werewolf. Even daemon cats and hellhounds had more instinctive control, though not much. I was in danger, and I did the thing I knew kept me most unalive. I shifted into wolf form -- and attacked.

Apollyon and I went tumbling, mass of claws, wings, and teeth, snarling up a storm. He gave as good as he got, which was a pity. I didn’t feel so great after a few minutes of this, but the positive was he wasn’t doing anything to anyone else.

I caught Ralph and Abaddon in a similar roll around and kill each other situation. So, we were fighting the big guys. But there were plenty more here who needed distracting, if killing wasn’t going to work.

I landed a really good chomp on Apollyon’s neck, and risked a look around. Interestingly, Sexy Cindy and Freddy were attacking Hitler and seemed to be making progress. Merc and L.K. were dealing with some of the other minions hanging around. But I didn’t see Jack or the Adversary, nor could I spot Nero. However, what I could see was the fact that I’d been wrong earlier -- there were indeed humans here, they were just floating up against the ceiling. I couldn’t tell if they were alive, dead, held in suspended animation, or worse. But I knew without asking that once the spell holding them was broken, they were going to tumble down the four stories and splat onto the floor.

Apollyon used my temporary distraction grab my stomach and start that horrible insides burning thing the fallen liked to do. It was boil like a cabbage or let him toss me off. I picked flying through the air, landed and scrambled to my paws. Apollyon had his sword in hand again, but he was backing away.

I would have congratulated myself on being totally badass, but I knew he’d hurt me more than I’d hurt him. I also spotted Abaddon backing away from Ralph. I risked a look around. Our troops were arriving.

The momentary relief washed away as I looked around some more. The minions were still backing away -- all of them, Hitler included. But they didn’t look worried or defeated. They looked smug.

Smug minions is never a good thing. Risking a look upward, I saw a variety of angels covering the floating humans. Okay, so it wasn’t that. I looked behind again. Nope, our guys were filling the Little Church right up. So, why the happy looks on our enemies’ faces? Something was wrong, and I had to figure it out fast.

A fact reared up. The Adversary was nowhere around. If this was the big battle, then the Adversary was supposed to lead it. If he wasn’t with us, then what was really going on?

The base of my tail wanted a word. Just one word. It shared the word and I knew it was right. “It’s a trap!” I bellowed. “All Enforcement personnel clear out!”

Sadly, this didn’t have the effect I was hoping for. The minions continued to smirk and my side didn’t turn and run. Nothing for it.

I leaped and landed on the podium where the microphone was. “Clear out! That’s an order!”

The mic was on and I’d been shouting at the top of my lungs. Anyone who missed that was deaf, because I was loud enough to raise the dead. Some of the Enforcement side started to do as they were told.

The angels, in particular, didn’t. I knew they were trying to save the humans. But a thought occurred. “They’re an illusion,” I broadcast. “All the humans are tucked away in their homes, waiting for whatever automaton orders may be coming. But those aren’t real.”

Jack made it over to me. “Are you crazy? Retreat? We can stop them.”

“It’s a trap. We need everyone out.”

“How so?” Ralph and the others were with us now.

“Illusion. It’s all illusion, like the Hellfire was. It’s not the start of Armageddon. It’s a trap to get rid of all of us.”

I heard a horrible rumbling sound, like the depths of Hell were coming out through the bowels of the Earth. The doors that had been blasted off the front of the church reappeared and slammed shut. I reminded myself that the bad guys knew how to fake a being into thinking they were getting Godly assistance when they really weren’t. The windows and glass all went black. I didn’t need to ask if they were covered with something we couldn’t get through. I heard a great deal of slamming, indicating that any and all exits were now firmly shut.

As I was wondering just what was coming next, a voice I knew well but sure didn’t want to spoke up.

“You were always too smart for these creatures.”

I turned around. Sure enough, there he was, in all his so-called glory. Twelve feet tall, looking like some sort of cross of every horrible, icky thing in all the planes of existence. Dear old Dad. And, lucky me, there was the Mother of the Ages, standing with him. Family reunion time. I couldn’t wait.

Chapter 54

The Adversary shifted -- now there was what looked like a man in front of me. It always interested me that, when using human form, the Adversary went for a Big Harp likeness more often than Little. By all accounts, they looked enough alike that it probably didn’t matter, but I figured he liked being larger because it was more intimidating.

My mother beamed. “Eudora, time to come home.” She took the Adversary’s hand like they were normal beings. “Your father’s been very patient with you, but you must stop this foolishness.”

“He’s not my father, and you’re not my mother.”

She shook her head. “You know that’s not true.”

The Adversary patted her hand. “Now, dear, you know how stubborn our little girl is.”

I managed not to gag. “I am stubborn, but I’m not your little girl. Get out of here, before we destroy you.” Hey, I was good with the false bravado.

He laughed. “You and all your personnel are trapped. Easily, I might add.” The Adversary leaned closer to me, and I managed to hold my ground. “Did you really think we’d make it this easy for you?”

“Well, you’re all none-too-bright, so, yeah, I did.” Right now, none-too-bright was running in the family but I figured any stalling I could do would be a help.

I jumped down from the podium and went to human form, during which process I took a quick look around. We had a lot of Enforcement personnel in here, but not all. The injured members of my team weren’t around, as far as I could tell. Whether that meant they’d been held at the hospital or if it meant we had more than one mole, I couldn’t guess.

Our angels were down from the ceiling and behind me, creating a barrier between the minions and the rest of our troops. Angels were also into the self-sacrifice thing, if it was the only option. I didn’t like that it appeared to be the only option.

“So, just what are you hoping to accomplish here?” I figured questions might get answers and any extra time was going to benefit our side more than theirs.

“Extermination of most of Necropolis Enforcement,” the Adversary replied like it was obvious. Well, it was, but it never hurt to see if there was more going on.

“That’s it? All the pretty pre-Armageddon displays were just to lure us? You’re not really bringing about the Apocalypse?”

“Oh, we are.” The Adversary let go of my mother’s hand and stepped closer to me. “But there are certain…things we…need first.” He put his hand out toward me. “Certain beings we wish to…protect.”

In human form Big and Little Harp had murdered every sibling I’d had, so I was quite clear that they didn’t have a truly paternal bone in their horribly creepy shared body. Ergo, they wanted me for another reason. But I had no clue what that reason might be.

“I’m good here, thanks.” I backed up a step, keeping the distance between us so the Adversary couldn’t just reach out and grab me. “I chose my side a couple of hundred years ago, remember?”

He shook his head. “It was chosen for you. By that
creature
.” He spat the last word.