The Night Off (11 page)

Nat shook her head. Emily’s diet dismayed her, but she loved the thought of cooking her some real food. “Well, I’m making you crepes. I’ve already seen how much fun it is to introduce you to new things.”

Blushing, Emily stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Nat’s neck. “Lucky for me you have so many skills.”

Nat beamed. Besides sex, cooking was the one other thing she knew she could do well. She wasn’t certain whether she was more nervous or excited about sharing that part of herself with Emily. In a way, it would leave her almost as vulnerable as allowing Emily inside her body. Cooking was akin to baring her soul, which is why she’d never been able to do it for anyone other than her best friend Bridget.

But she wanted Emily to see her—to
really
see her—and feeding her was the best way she knew how.

Emily couldn’t stop glancing over at Nat during the drive to the grocery store. As much as she wanted to concentrate on the road, it was impossible not to let her gaze stray for occasional reality checks. She couldn’t believe the turn their night together had taken. Even though the sex had been fantastic, she had never dreamed that Nat would invite her home afterward. She hoped she understood what was happening between them—she assumed it was casual sex, but something about Nat’s affectionate attention told her it could be more. Outside the bedroom, Nat was polite, gentle, and solicitous. She seemed genuinely interested in who Emily was. And if she was trying to hide what seemed like very real infatuation, she was doing a terrible job of it.

Emily was infatuated, too. Nat was her perfect fantasy of masculine femininity. She exuded a definite air of danger, yet Emily sensed that with the right woman, she would be as loyal as a puppy. And she knew how to
fuck
. It all made for a very attractive package, one that Emily couldn’t resist, even as her gut told her that trying to make this date last beyond their one special night was flirting with disaster.

There were so many ways this situation could end badly. That Nat might think better of her attraction wasn’t her biggest worry, although the thought did sadden her. Scarier than rejection was the possibility that she might actually fall for Nat, and Nat for her. She meant what she’d told Nat—she was too busy for a relationship. She had Colleen to raise, at least for another few months, and after that she had to work and pay for Colleen’s college. That left no room in her life for a girlfriend, which suited her fine, most days. Being alone was easier. Relationships were messy, and relying on other people had never gotten her anywhere.

“You’re awfully quiet.”

Emily startled as Nat’s low voice broke through her thoughts. She glanced over, plastering on a grin that she hoped didn’t look as anxious as she felt. “Sorry. Just thinking.”

Nat rubbed a hand over her head, utterly delicious in all her butch glory. She’d changed into a spare set of clothes she kept at the penthouse, faded blue jeans and an obviously cherished T-shirt that bore the name of a band Emily didn’t know. Sexy was an understatement. She was pretty sure that if Nat asked her what was wrong, looking like that, she would have a hell of a time not spilling her guts. Doing so would surely end their date in a hurry. Then again, maybe that would be for the best.

But Nat didn’t ask. Instead she said, “So do you like being an accountant?”

Emily relaxed. That was an easy one. “I do. I love numbers. I find them very comforting.”

“I’m impressed. I always hated math class, myself.” Nat gave her a not-so-subtle once-over, seemingly torn between amusement and desire. “Were you one of those brainy girls in high school?”

“I guess so. I excelled in my classes, if that’s what you mean. Math most of all.” Aware that she was outing herself as a geek in a very big way, Emily couldn’t help but smile at her fond memories of precalculus and geometry. “I loved that numbers would never let me down. They’re consistent, understandable, and orderly—everything my life at home wasn’t.” She rolled her eyes. “God, no wonder I haven’t had a date in four years. Listen to me.”

Nat reached over the center console and placed a hand on Emily’s thigh. “You’re adorable.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Are you kidding me? In high school I was the bad girl…and who do you think this bad girl
always
had crushes on?” Nat brushed her free hand over Emily’s breast, teasing her nipple. “The pretty, innocent valedictory types…the good girls. The girls who liked math class and blushed when they caught me staring.” She kissed Emily’s cheek, whispering, “You’re gorgeous when you blush.”

Emily inhaled swiftly, nearly missing her turn into the grocery-store parking lot. “And you’re incredibly charming.” Overwhelmed by Nat’s proximity, she quickly pulled into a spot near the front entrance. Because Nat had taken a taxi to her workplace last night, riding together this morning had been a no-brainer. Unfortunately, the arrangement didn’t allow her any time to clear her head. “
Dangerously
charming.”

“Charming, yes. Dangerous?” Nat shrugged as she unbuckled her seat belt. “I’m harmless.”

If only. The strength of the feelings Nat stirred inside her was anything but harmless. Emily liked Nat, a lot, but she had so many things to hold together in her life. If she let any of them slip, she would fail both Colleen and herself. Romance was a distraction—one that would almost inevitably lead to pain. It hardly seemed fair to risk the relative order she’d finally brought to her and Colleen’s lives for something that could shatter her if it ended badly.

Of course, none of her fears would convince her to call off their day together. Oh, no. Regardless of what her gut said, she was determined to see where the weekend took them. She was feeling good and having fun in a way she hadn’t in years, and she didn’t want it to end. Extending their date another day—hell, even two—was a simple matter of embracing joy where she could find it. And it didn’t have to be anything more than what it was: a good time.

Emily smiled. “Maybe we have different definitions of ‘harmless.’ My ass is still aching from that spanking last night.”

Quirking her lip, Nat said, “Well, you deserved that. And you seemed to enjoy it…very, very much, if your soaking-wet cunt was any indication.”

Emily flinched at the vulgarity, her face warming instantly. Again, as it had last night, the word both aroused and disturbed her. She held her breath when Nat scraped her teeth over her neck, biting gently. The slight pain sent a tiny thrill through her body, and suddenly, embarrassed was the last thing she felt.

Nat pulled back with a soothing lick to her throat. “I mean it. When you blush like that, it takes everything I have not to throw you down and just take you.”

Emily’s pussy clenched. Gritting her teeth, she said, “We need to go in the store before I beg you to do exactly that.”

“Exhibitionist.” Nat chuckled. “Come on. I just need to grab a few things. It won’t take long.” She opened the car door and climbed out like it was nothing. Emily needed a good ten seconds to remember how to use her legs.

She finally got out of the car, rolling her eyes when Nat gave her a shit-eating grin. “Proud, are you? Of teasing the undersexed?” She sniffed, pretending to walk past Nat. “I’m an easy target, I get it.”

Nat caught her wrist and tugged her backward, pulling Emily against her chest in a possessive yet tender embrace. Lowering her voice to a murmur, she said, “You won’t be undersexed when I’m done with you.”

Grinning, Emily glanced around the parking lot to make sure no one was within earshot, then settled into Nat’s arms. “Promise?”

“I promise. When you go to work on Monday morning and sit down in your office chair, you’ll be thinking about me. Because you’ll still be able to
feel
what I’m going to do to you this weekend.”

Emily closed her eyes, battling the crush of physical need Nat’s words elicited. It was amazing how swiftly her newly reawakened sexual desire wiped away all her fears and doubts about spending the day with Nat. At this point it no longer mattered that she was frightened of all the ways this could turn complicated. She needed to feel Nat inside her again. Even if she was afraid that Monday morning would also bring a pathetic yearning for more, it was too late to do anything about it now. She was hooked.

Nat kissed her ear, squeezed her around the middle, then released her. “Let’s hurry and get these groceries. The sooner we eat, the sooner we can go back to bed.”

Emily opened her eyes. “Agreed.”

*

They finished their grocery trip in record time, and when they got to Nat’s apartment, they were in such a rush Emily barely had a chance to glance around at the décor as she followed Nat inside. The front room contained simple, elegant furniture and four bookshelves that were crammed to bursting. A few photos hung on the wall, but she didn’t have time to study them before Nat whisked them into an immaculate kitchen.

“Wow.” Emily gazed around in awe as Nat set their grocery bags on the counter. The room looked as though it belonged in a different apartment—a much larger one, possibly a penthouse like they’d just left. Nat had brand-new kitchen appliances of all shapes and sizes lining the wide, stone counters, including some that she didn’t recognize. Her double oven was beautiful and expensive-looking—she doubted it had come with the apartment. “This is a pretty incredible setup.”

Nat opened the refrigerator, which Emily could see was packed with fresh vegetables and cheeses, and withdrew a carton of eggs. “Thanks. My kitchen is my one real indulgence.” She grabbed a blender from beneath the counter, then quickly began pouring and measuring ingredients. “I spend a lot of time in here.”

“Can I do anything to help?”

“Sit there and let me admire you while I make you breakfast.”

Emily sat on the stool across the counter from Nat. “I can do that.”

Nat stopped what she was doing and leaned over the counter, kissing her on the lips. “When’s the last time someone took care of you?”

Blushing, Emily said, “I can’t remember.”

“This weekend, I’m doing just that.”

It was against Emily’s nature to rely on anyone, for anything. She had always been the caretaker in her house, even when she was little, so not being the one
doing
had a tendency to make her uncomfortable. But she felt no discomfort with Nat. Just as Nat had put her at ease about submitting to a dominant lover, her calm competence in the kitchen allowed Emily to watch, content, as Nat prepared her a meal.

Last night had clearly made an impact. Today she felt almost like a different person. A happier, more relaxed person. Emily folded her hands on the counter and exhaled, enjoying the uncharacteristic peace of a morning free of responsibility.

“You look happy.”

Emily laughed. She normally held her emotions close, but apparently Nat had no trouble reading her. “I am. This is a nice morning.”

“Good.” Nat pulsed the blender. “I’m happy, too.”

Nat poured the batter she’d blended into a bowl, covered it with cling wrap, and placed it in the fridge. Then she pulled out a sharp knife and began chopping fresh mushrooms. At the store, she’d told Emily she was making her both a sweet and a savory crepe, and had offered a list of savory items she could incorporate. They’d settled on an egg, caramelized onion, and mushroom crepe, which would be followed by Nat’s favorite chocolate hazelnut fruit crepe. Watching Nat move around the kitchen with confidence, Emily sensed she was in for a real treat. The woman knew how to
fuck
and, it seemed, she knew how to
cook
, too.

Emily scanned the room, looking for anything that might give her more insight into who Nat was. A small table with two chairs sat behind them. Hanging over the table, in full view of the kitchen, was a picture of a gorgeous brunette girl with familiar bone structure. She glanced between the photo and Nat’s handsome face a couple of times, trying to decide whether the woman in the picture was Nat’s mother. And whether it was acceptable to ask.

“That’s my mother.”

Emily jumped slightly. It was as though Nat was reading her mind. Unnerving, to say the least. “She’s beautiful.”

Nat lifted her face and gazed at the picture. Emily could see love tinged with sadness in her eyes. “I think so, too.”

“You look like her.”

Having cut into an onion, Nat’s sudden tears might have just been a reaction to the pungent aroma, but Emily didn’t think so. It was obvious that this was a difficult topic. “Thank you.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin our happy morning.” Emily reached over the counter and rubbed away a tear with her thumb. “Let’s talk about something else.”

Nat shook her head, then shrugged away from Emily and swiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. “It’s just this onion. I’m fine.”

“Okay.” Wishing she knew how to move them past this moment, Emily searched for something to say. Frustrated when she drew a blank, she pulled her hands back and folded them in her lap.

“I didn’t even know what she looked like, my mother, until I was sixteen.”

Surprised that Nat had chosen to share something so personal, Emily was caught between sympathy and unease. This conversation was a far cry from casual sex. Yet she wanted to know more. “Your father never showed you a picture?”

“No. We never had any around the house. We didn’t even talk about her. The first time I remember asking him about my mother, he slapped me so hard I fell down. I was four years old, but I’ll never forget it.” Nat’s hands kept moving as she spoke. She put the onions and mushrooms in a skillet to start caramelizing, then turned to the eggs. “When I got up the courage to ask him what she looked like when I was twelve years old, he told me that all his photos of her had been destroyed in a fire. And that since I was the reason she’d left—the reason she was dead—I didn’t deserve to see her, anyway.”

“Oh, Nat.” Emily swallowed, sick to her stomach at the thought of any child being treated that way. That the child had been Nat—kind, handsome, considerate Nat—was almost unbearably painful. “That’s awful. You didn’t deserve that.”

Nat paused in her preparations and gave Emily a tight smile. “I know. He was a bastard.”