Authors: Jim Thompson
Tags: #Fiction, #Crime, #Mystery & Detective, #Hard-Boiled, #General, #Detective and mystery stories, #Veterans, #Criminals, #Psychological fiction, #Psychology, #Criminals - Fiction, #Veterans - Psychology - Fiction
"Let it go. It's no use," I said.
"Whatever I got out of Stukey it wouldn't be enough! After all I've been through!"
"No," I said. "It wouldn't be enough."
I sat up and uncorked the bottle. I took a drink, replaced the cork, and fumbled for a cigarette. I didn't have any with me, of course, any dry ones. They were back in the car. I reached out to the reading stand, took a cigarette from her package, and lighted it.
"Brownie-" She sat up, too, half sat up, with her legs folded under her.
"Yes?" I said.
"You know I wouldn't do that, don't you?" She smiled at me brightly. "It's like you say. How could I when I love you so much? And-but, oh, Brownie! Let's go back together! Please, darling. It won't make any difference, and even if it does a little it'll still be better than this. I just can't go on like-"
"No," I said. "You can't, and you won't."
And I brought the bottle down on her head.
I stood looking down at her, and my head swam and I weaved slowly on my feet. The wetness and the exertion and the long talk were sobering me, and when I sobered I became drunk. Far drunker than any amount of whisky could make me. All my sureness was gone, and the ten thousand parts of an insane puzzle were scattered to the winds.
She lay, twitching a bit and moaning, with her head and shoulders slumping toward her knees, her thighs in a tangent curve to her legs. A question mark. She was a question, and she had to be answered.
Had it been necessary?
Or had I done it because I wanted to?
Was every move I made, as Dave Randall had once angrily declared, designed to extract payment from the world for the hell I dwelt in? Had I tried to destroy slowly and, failing that, killed wantonly?
It was a nice question. It was something to think about on these long rainy evenings.
I took another stiff drink.
The terrible sobriety-drunkenness, with its terrible questions, began to fade. I slid back into the sideways world. This was the way it was, and the way it was was this.
Yet it was hard to leave her like this. Something seemed to need doing, some small thing. Something she'd always wanted, perhaps, without conscious awareness of the want.
I could think of only one thing.
I pulled the sheet over her now semi-conscious body. I upended the bottle of whisky and sprinkled it over the sheet. I jerked several matches from a pad and struck them.
"You said to," I said. "Remember, Ellen? You always said to burn you up…"
And I let the matches fall.
I leaned back across the thwarts, letting my fingers trail in the water. I closed my eyes, feeling the boat rock and roll, feeling it turn round and round gently as it moved out into the bay. It was very peaceful for a time. Very restful. I had had nothing to do with anything, and now I had nothing to do with this. I was a man following orders, cleareyed, clear-thinking, and if those orders had led me-led me…
_She had looked very beautiful. She had glowed, oh, but definitely she had glowed. She had been all lit up, burning with a clear-blue flame, and then the mattress had started to smolder and_…
I screamed but there was no sound. I was throwing up.
The boat had begun to spin. It was caught in the trough between two tall shore-bound rollers, pulled by one and pushed by the other, and it spun faster and faster. Suddenly it reared up on end and shot to the crest of the first wave. It hung poised there for a moment, then it dropped down, spinning, to the other side.
Tons of water plunged into it. It went down, vanished as completely as though it had never existed, and I went on. There was a thunderous roar, an incessant crashing. And then I was gripping something hard and slimy… one of the piles of the pier.
That's the way it was to be, then. The decision had been made. I pulled myself from pile to pile until I found the ladder. I climbed up to the pier and returned to my car. I drove away.
My house-to use the noun loosely-is some six miles north of Pacific City. Years ago it was occupied by a railroad section gang-in the days when section hands were largely itinerant Mexicans. When I discovered it, it was a lopsided ruin, headquarters seemingly for the county's population of creeping and crawling things.
The railroad gladly rented it to me for five dollars a month. A hundred dollars and a few hundred hours work had made it reasonably habitable. It is a little noisy, perhaps, since it sits on railroad right-of-way, and it is more than a little sooty. But as rental properties go in Pacific City-properties within the financial reach of the modestsalaried man-it is still very much a bargain. We do not believe in "government handouts" here, you see. We scorn socialistic housing programs. We hold to the American way of life, the good old laws of supply and demand. That is, the landlords supply what they care to in the way of housing and demand what they feel like. And the tenant, bless him, oh, hail his rugged independence, is perfectly free to pay it and like it. Or sleep in the streets. Where, of course, he will be promptly arrested by Lem Stukey for vagrancy.
I will say this for Stukey: he is absolutely fearless and relentless where vagrants are concerned. Let Lem and his minions apprehend some penniless wanderer, preferably colored and over sixty-five, and the machinery of the law goes into swift and remorseless action. Sixty days on the road gang, six months on the county farm-so it goes. Nor is that always as far as it goes. In an amazing number of instances, the vagrant appears to be the very person responsible for a long series of hitherto unsolved crimes..
Good old Lem and his rubber hose! Unless I missed my guess, I'd be seeing him shortly.
I parked my car at the side of the house and went inside. I filled a water glass with whisky and put it down at a gulp. Fire blazed through me. My heart did frantic setting-up exercises for a moment, then steadied off into a slow, steady pounding. All at once I felt almost happy. For the first time in a long time, life seemed really interesting. There was a rift-and a widening one-in the dead-gray monotony of existence.
I went into the bedroom and shucked out of my clothes. The phone rang and I trotted back into the living-room to answer it, pulling a robe around me.
"Brownie-Clint?" It was Dave Randall.
"Why, Colonel," I said. "How nice of you to call! How are all the wee ones and-"
"Brownie, for God's sake! Have you seen Lem Stukey?"
"Frequently," I said. "As a devoted Courier man, I am brought into contact with many strange-"
"Please, Brownie! He hasn't been in touch with you in the last hour or so?"
"No"-I put a frown into my voice-"what's up, Dave?"
"It's about-Where have you been all evening, Clint? Lem's been tearing up the town to find you. He called me. He even called Mr. Lovelace."
"But why? What about?"
I smiled to myself. It was wonderful to be interested again.
"I-I think I'd better come out there, Brownie. I think, perhaps, I'd better bring Mr. Lovelace with me."
"Oh?" I said, and I made the voice-frown a little stronger. "What's the trouble, Dave?"
"I can't-I think I'd better tell you in person. Brownie-"
"Yes?"
"Where have you been tonight?"
"Drinking. Riding and drinking. Walking and drinking. Sitting by the roadside and drinking."
"Were you with anyone? Is there any way you could establish your whereabouts?"
"No," I said, "to both questions… Look, Dave, I didn't run over anyone, did I? I was pretty woozy, but-"
"I'll see you," he said. "I'll be right out."
We hung up. I sat down on the lounge and went to work on the bottle. I was feeling better and better. There was nothing in my stomach but this clean, fresh whisky, and there was nothing in my mind but a problem. No Ellen. No oblong of bright-blue flame. Only an interesting problem.
About ten minutes had passed when a car roared up the lane from the highway and skidded to a stop in the yard. It was Lem Stukey, and he was by himself. Naturally, on anything as good as this, he would be by himself. I looked up as he walked in. I blinked my eyes, frowned, and took another drink from the bottle.
He stood in the doorway, his hands on his hips, his hat thrust back on his oily head. And there was an expression of sad reproach on his sleek, round face.
He waited for me to speak. I let him go right on waiting. Finally he crossed the room and pulled up a chair in front of me.
"Keed," he said, sorrowfully, "you shouldn't've done it. You should have knowed you couldn't get away with it."
"Well," I shrugged, "nothing ventured, nothing gained."
"She wasn't worth it, Brownie."
"No," I said, "I don't suppose she was. But, then, who is?"
"I don't see no way out for you, keed. Not unless I was to kind of take a hand personally. If I was to do that, now, call it an accident-"
"Why don't you?" I said. "After all, a pal's a pal, I always say."
"You mean that, Brownie? You'll play ball with me like I been askin' you to?"
"Well"-I hesitated-"isn't it pretty muddy outside?"
"Muddy? I don't dig you, keed."
"To play ball."
"Look!" he snarled, and his hand closed over my arm. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"I don't know," I said. "What are you talking about?"
He jumped up and stood over me. I started to rise and he shoved me back hard.
"I'm talking about murder, you smart bastard! You were over to the island tonight. You killed her. You coldcocked her and set fire to her. Left her to burn up in the bed. Only she didn't burn up, see. She didn't die right away. I figure her hair probably cushioned the blow, and she came to when she felt herself burnin'. Anyway, she got up and got to the dresser. She got something out of her purse. She had it balled up in her hand when the island cops found her."
I looked at him, blinking a little owlishly, sifting through the situation one fact at a time. It wasn't particularly startling, although I suspect that I was guilty of at least a small start. I'd been pretty wobbly on my pins when I swung the bottle, and she did have a thick head of hair. And the whisky would have tended to burn away before the bedclothes themselves caught fire.
Now, as to this "something" she'd taken from her purse…
"To borrow an expression," I said, "I don't dig you, keed. Just who am I supposed to have killed?"
"Don't pull that innocent crap on me! Who the hell else would have killed your wife? She wasn't robbed. It's a cinch it wasn't a rape murder. Anyone that wanted any of that could have had it for-"
I came up then, and I came up swinging. I hit him an open-palmed slap across the jaw, hit him so hard his hat sailed from his head. His hand darted to his hip, but he didn't draw the gun. I sat back down again and buried my face in my hands.
After a while I said, "Are you sure it was murder? It couldn't have been an accident?"
"Who you kidding?" he said. "You goin' to tell me that she fell on
top
of her head? That she wiped the place clean of fingerprints herself?"
"Wi-!" I caught myself, choked the word into a meaningless grunt. "This object she had in her hand. What was it?"
"A poem, kind of a poem. She put the finger right on you, keed. She'd had it a long time; it was practically worn out with all the folding and refolding it had gone through. You wrote it for her, and she'd been carrying it around all this time. Ever since you split up. Yessir, she knew that when we saw it, we'd-"
"It had my name on it?"
"It didn't need no name on it. She never really went for no one but you. Anyway, she sure wasn't going for anyone three-four years ago when this must've been written. When you an' her were still tied up."
"Maybe she wrote it herself."
"Huh-uh. She wasn't up to anything that sharp. And what the hell? A dame's dying, and she goes for a poem she's written? You know better than that, keed. You wrote it. It sounds like you to a t, and she knew I'd see that-"
"What was it?" I said. "Have you got it with you?"
"It figures, Brownie. It all adds up to just one guy. No one else had any motive. No one else would have written a thing like this. It had to be someone that lives here- someone I'd know-and, palsy, that ain't no one but-"
"I'd like to hear it," I said. "Do you mind?"
"I don't mind a bit, keed." He took a notebook from his pocket and opened it. "Catch a load. I don't know that I can pronounce all the words just right, but-"
"Go ahead. I'll try to interpret."
"Sure," he said, and he read:
_Lady of the endless lust,
Itching lips and heaving bust,
Lady save it, lady scram, lady hang it on a nail
Get thee hence nor leave behind you
Any vestige of your tail_.
He finished reading and looked at me sharply. I looked back at him indifferently. I'd written it, of course, it and some fifty or sixty similar bits of doggerel. But that had been long ago, and they'd been done on various odds and ends of paper and on a variety of typewriters. On the Red Cross machines in hospitals. In newspaper offices. In dollar-an-hour, type-your-own-letter places. They couldn't be traced to me. I'd written them out of bitterness and brooding-at a time when I was still bitter and brooding- out of hate and resentment and restlessness. And, finally, I had presented them to Ellen. I had dedicated them to her.
I'd shown them to no one but her. No one but she knew that I had written them. I wondered what masochistic urge had led her to save this one after destroying the others.
"Well, keed?" Stukey grinned at me. "What you say?"
"I gather that that's a copy," I said. "Where's the original?"
"The cops over on the island have it. They read it off to me over the telephone."
"You haven't seen it yourself, then? You don't actually know that it's as they described it? Old and creased and-"
"What the hell you gettin' at?"
"I've already arrived. But you, my dear Stukey, are very far behind. You didn't see the poem. You didn't see her. You don't know-"
"They're kidding me, huh?" He let out a snort. "They made it all up just to cause some excitement."
"You're chief of detectives. You seem to regard this as a pretty important case. So important that you had to bother my publisher and editor about it. Yet you've got your evidence by telephone. Why? Why didn't you go over there?"
"Well-uh-" He licked his lips. "You know, keed. The bay's been kinda choppy. Ain't no real reason why I couldn't have gone, if I'd figured it was necessary, but- uh-"
"A little choppy, eh? The ferries and charter boats aren't running, and it's just a little choppy. Cut it out, Stuke. You didn't go because you couldn't. No one could have."
"That's what you say! I-"
"So did you, earlier this evening. Remember our conversation at your office? No one could have crossed that bay tonight. _No one_. Certainly he couldn't have crossed it twice. If you don't know that, you ought to be back walking a beat, which, now that I think of it, might be an excellent idea."
His face reddened; his round, overbright little eyes shifted nervously. "Now, look, Brownie. It's just as plain as day-"