The Nutcracker Bleeds (3 page)

Olivia
remembered the last story that her uncle had told her before he’d left, for he
always told her stories, and she always remembered every one. The last one he
spoke to her was about a girl who opened a box that she was not supposed to,
and inside were all the dreadful things in the world, released simply because
she’d been too curious to control her actions. Olivia remembered this, and
since he had left, she’d not wondered once what he’d bring her, remembering
that curiosity was bad, but silently hoping he
wouldn’t
bring the gift
to her in a box.

Olivia
could hear sounds of disturbance from the children’s table as they finished
their meal, now as they headed towards the tree with excited voices. She also
heard the adults beginning to stir. It wouldn’t be much longer until they would
all be opening presents. The more she thought, the more she longed to see–

Outside
the door to her left, she began to hear a gentle scraping on the stoop. The
girl’s face lit up immediately and she pulled herself up with her petticoats.
She ignored Anne, who had lingered with her silently, heading to the door in a
rush as the thumping of a cane outside became louder and closer. She pulled
open the door happily before any servant could reach it, and there he stood.

Olivia
stepped back to let him inside, and soon all the children were aware of his
arrival. The shadow of a tall, stooped man came into the house, his cane
thumping along with him. He wore a long brown coat, his white hair hanging to
his shoulders, his hat covered with snow. One blind eye was concealed by a
patch and he carried a large bag on his back.

He
looked nothing like a toymaker. In fact, he seemed like the sort of man that
children might have feared, but there was not one here whose eyes did not
glimmer for his arrival. He had a warm smile and soothing voice, with which
he’d won over many. On this Christmas Eve, he appeared before the children like
a rather thin and ghastly Father Christmas, but they welcomed him just the
same.

Once
he saw Olivia and the other children, his face lit with joy, happy to see them
after such a long time. At once they all began speaking, asking questions of
him and wanting hugs. The adults had gathered in the hall at the ruckus. A
servant pulled a chair out into the floor for Euan, and another took the bag
from his shoulder.

Euan
sat in the chair, speaking with those who welcomed him, but all this was silent
to Olivia’s ears. The smile on her face could not be tarnished. He was the most
important person in her life, and finally he was back after leaving her alone
for quite some time. It seemed like forever, but now all of that was in the
past. She shoved it away to be forgotten.

“I’m
so glad you’re home, uncle,” she said as she hugged his neck tightly.

“As
I am glad to be back with you,” Euan said sincerely. “Now,” he began,
addressing them all. “I do believe I have something for all of you.”

The
children smiled happily, sitting on the floor in front of him to wait until
they were called. They all wore huge smiles, and Olivia joined them, having no
problem with awaiting her turn. She knew that the wait would be worthwhile.

 
4

Anne
stood near the fireplace, feeling the warmth of the flames against her back.
She watched Olivia sit down with the other children, though clearly much older
than they were. Euan gave out his gifts to them one by one, and Anne was all
the while thinking how pathetic it was. Anne had never been so spoiled.

That
is all her problem is
.
She’s petted,
Anne thought, but she would never suggest that aloud.

“Do
you think the way you treat her is right?” The low voice near Anne’s ear
startled her. Had the tone been any less smooth, she might have shrieked with
surprise.

Anne
turned her head to see Todd, who had stepped up without her notice. He stood
facing the children, his arms crossed before him, his dark hair silky and perfect.
Anne didn’t see this young man often, but they had spoken before. He had never
been very formal with her, and Anne was not afraid of her dialogue now–but to
her dismay, all he seemed interested in talking about was Olivia.

“And
how is it that I treat her?” she asked lowly, hoping to hide their conversation
from the others who were standing about. They should not have been speaking in
view of others, but Todd did not seem to care.

“You
all treat her like a child,” Todd said simply, a bit snide.

“That’s
how she
wants
to be treated,” Anne insisted, tilting her head toward
Olivia where she sat on the floor with the younger ones. “Look at her. She’s
one of them.”

“If
you’d treat her like an adult, perhaps she’d act like one,” he said heatedly.
“She’s not ignorant. You allow her to be viewed as this.”

Anne
was getting annoyed with his tone, but it wouldn’t be proper for her to raise
her voice.

“There
is no hope for her,” said the nurse, her words level, but proving without a
doubt that she’d given up on the girl. “She is lost to whatever strange demon
resides in her mind. That is all. Nothing can be done.”

“I
refuse to believe it,” said Todd, turning his face to her finally.

At
his simple piercing stare, Anne’s heart began to speed. Clearly though, he
didn’t desire her for conversation, or anything else for that matter. He would
only scold her and she was unable to escape, yet she would remain upright and
without emotion in the face of it.

“You
refuse to believe that she is mad?” Anne asked him pointedly.

“No,”
Todd revised. “I refuse to believe that she is incapable of getting well. She’s
strange, that’s true…” He sent his gaze back to Olivia, still sitting on the
floor–waiting. “I would prove that there was something different inside her,”
Todd said thoughtfully, “but you must let her go first.”

What?
A shiver ran up
Anne’s back, across her neck and reaching toward her ears. Todd had asked her
to let Olivia go? He had asked her to leave this place? Impossible. To give
Olivia up would be to let go of everything she had here. No! There would be no
giving up. She had worked hard to establish her place in this house, and she
intended to hold onto it.

“I
cannot leave her,” Anne declared with valiant devotion–a lie which they both
recognized. “She’s not well. I care too much about her to leave.”

“You
care
nothing
about her,” he countered. “No one does.”

“And
you would pretend to,” the nurse accused quietly. “Wanting to take her away for
study at your
University
, no doubt.”

Todd
fell silent a moment, refusing to look in her eyes.

“I
suppose this is not the time to speak of these things,” he decided finally,
though no one else in the room had seemed to notice their exchange. “Perhaps
later.”

He
leaned back against the mantle then, setting his sight intently on the
gift–giving ahead, just as it was time for Euan to present Olivia with her
gift.

Anne
tried to forget what had just transpired, or to at least appear as though it
had not affected her, but at the moment, she was relieved that Todd could not
see her face. She would not have admitted it, but his words troubled her.
Inside, she felt threatened, and she did not like that notion at all.

5

The
children were happy to have received their presents of dolls and soldiers, none
looking quite alike, but Euan was most happy to present Olivia with her gift.
She was his sweetest girl and held a special place in his heart, even if the
rest did not recognize the beauty of her state.

She
came forward, standing in front of him with innocence that could not be ripped
away by the progression of age. This warmed Euan’s heart. He smiled
affectionately.

“Every
year for fifteen years, I’ve made your gift,” he began, “but this year, in my
travels, I came across something that I wanted for you. I don’t know why I chose
it,” he said, trailing off into his thoughts a moment, “but as soon as I saw
him, I knew he was for you.”

Reaching
into the bag, her uncle pulled out a gift wrapped in paper. He must have known
of her fear of a box, and Olivia was happy to open it. She peeled back the
paper carefully until finally, she saw the thing that was to be hers, and her
eyes lit up with surprise and wonder.

“Do
you like him?” Euan asked hopefully, though he knew she would not refuse.

In
her hand rested the gift. He was tall, cut from rich, brown wood and painted
with precise detail. His face was carefully carved with surprisingly smooth
cheeks, a perfect nose, and a stern, attractive mouth. His wooden head was
draped in white hair that reached down his chest, almost seeming real. He had
no visible eyes, but empty sockets of black that created the illusion of eyes.
He was straight and tall, his arms at his sides, but strangely, under his arms
were ridges of metal, and mirrored crests were against the sides of his waist.

Euan
watched Olivia examine him–as she lifted one arm out to the side, letting it
fall back to hit against the metal ridges of his torso with a cold, iron clank.
To his pleasure, she was amazed and enthralled by it.

“I’ve
never seen quite an interesting nutcracker,” said Euan thoughtfully, almost as
if to himself. “His arms are for the cracking, not his teeth. And his face is
carved so beautifully–a prince among nutcrackers. He must definitely be rare.
He was not in the best shape, but I cleaned him up and gave him a new coat of
paint. Now he’s good as new.”

Olivia
examined the toy’s small mouth, seeming amazed to find that there were simply a
pair of carefully carved lips; no large jaunty teeth like the common sort. Euan
could tell she loved him immediately.

“He’s
wonderful,” she said in awe as she gazed down at the nutcracker prince. She
hugged him, and when she drew back, Euan saw the same little girl that had
always smiled back at him, never changing. As long as she was pleased, all was
right with the world.

6

Once
Olivia had been presented with her gift from Euan, she had been given other
unwrapped boxes, but the girl had lost interest. She cared nothing about other
gifts she might have, fascinated as she was by the nutcracker. She would have
the others tomorrow, and Olivia could not be bothered to care what her family
thought of her. She was as oblivious as any spoiled child, and when she asked
Anne to take her to her room, her request was granted.

1

Dressed
in her pale nightgown, Olivia held the nutcracker lovingly, completely taken
with the decorative doll. He had strong arms; she liked that about him. He was
a perfect, though unconventional–looking soldier. He would keep her safe.

She
ran her fingers lightly across his painted wooden chest, smiling down at him.
None of the other dolls would have this one for a prince. He was too beautiful
to share. In her mind, she saw herself and this nutcracker dancing across a
huge ballroom floor, gazing at each other.

But
he will go to war first
, Olivia thought with satisfaction.
Yes, he would
fight for his lady without hesitation.

She
was so infatuated in that moment that she didn’t hear the door of her room
slowly creak open. Or perhaps she simply chose to ignore it.

A
figure stepped inside, closing the door and locking away the light from the
hall lamp. Feet stepped quietly across the inner rug and passed the bed,
stopping before a shelf of dolls on the far wall. Olivia was aware of him now,
though she intended to ignore him as a shadow on the edge of her vision–but her
attention was drawn to him when his young hands lifted up one of her porcelain
dolls with exaggerated care.

“You
didn’t seem very sociable at dinner,” said Todd, examining the doll a moment
before setting it back on the shelf. “Is your uncle the only one you’re pleased
to see?”

Olivia
averted her eyes, refusing him for the nutcracker in her grasp. She wished he
would go away, but instead he moved towards the bed, sitting beside her
carefully, only to watch her a short moment before he spoke.

“I
missed you,” he said. “Did you not miss me at all?”

Olivia
ignored him, trotting the nutcracker across the bed in front of her.
If I
pretend I don’t see him, he will go away.
When he lingered, she finally
stopped, slowly drifting her blue eyes toward Todd as he sat silently, staring
at her. She didn’t like that gaze. It made her think of a hungry wolf.

“What
if I had,” she asked, “but then decided
not
to miss you? I was perfectly
fine without you being here.”

“You
didn’t think about me at all?” he asked, touching her shoulder.

She
shrank back at his touch, disgusted by it.

“I
made it just fine without your company,” she insisted, managing to shrug him
off.

Todd
stood then, stepping to glance at the shelf of dolls in front of him once
again. His action seemed nonchalant, but she had seen the anger in his eyes.

“
These
kept you company?” he asked, staring at all the blank expressions on their
lovely faces. “They aren’t making you better, you know. Though I wonder how
sick you are to begin with.”

“You
shouldn’t be here,” she said quietly in a pout. “It’s improper for a man to be
in a lady’s room.”

“Ah,
but you’re not a lady, are you? You’re a
child
.”

He
turned to face her, and though she knew it, she ignored his words, only to play
with her new gift. Todd sighed, crossing his arms before him as he watched her.

“Olivia,”
he said firmly, commanding her attention. Finally she looked at him, though
only slightly from beneath her lashes.

“They
are not treating you well,” he insisted. “You know what I want.”

Todd
sat beside her again–once again on the doll quilt–taking her shoulders gently
while forcing her to look into his eyes. “I asked you to come with me. I can
take care of you better than they can.”

Olivia
was silent a moment. Yes, he’d asked her before to go with him, promised they’d
live in Paris. He’d said he’d take care of her and not let her be overlooked–as
she was here.

It
had sounded good to her for a while, his promises set to music by his silky
voice. He was persuasive, yet she could not bear the thought of parting with
her uncle. She may not see him but once a year! That was longer than she could
take. More than that, she didn’t think she could part with the dolls, the
puppets, and the toys. Her
friends.
Todd would make her get rid of them;
that was certain. Olivia had then wondered how she really felt about Todd.
She’d pondered her own feelings for a while, and come to the only conclusion.
No, she could not go.

“I
can’t go with you,” she said to him finally. “If I go, they will have no one to
be friends with. No one will look after them. It would be selfish of me.”

He
quivered in his skin as she said this. Olivia saw it.

“Why
do you reject me?” he asked. “You know how I desire you.”

He
sounded angry, and Olivia wasn’t sure why. When she only stared at him, he
brought her up from the bed forcibly, jerking her like a child. She came to
silent attention, gaping with wide eyes, her gown drooping over her smooth
shoulder. She still held the nutcracker in one hand, unwilling to release
herself from it as if the toy were a sacred relic that would protect her. She
readied herself, staring at him, awaiting what would come.

2

Todd
had always considered himself to have a firm grasp on his emotions. He could
put on any sort of face necessary, yet he found that his best intentions always
got away from him when Olivia was involved. Whether in her presence or even to
simply discuss her, he was not the same rational man he prided himself in being.
Now was no different.

Why
did she do this? She pretended to ignore, refusing to hear anything she did not
want to, and no one forced her otherwise. He shook his head, tired of her
games.

All
she spoke of were these dolls–these toys that surrounded her! Did she not know
how he felt? Surely she must, despite her naiveté. He was her cousin by blood,
that was true, but he had loved her always. He’d been dreaming–for years!–of
the day that he would take her away with him and show her that there was more
to life than her dolls.

As
he looked down at her, her hands caressing the nutcracker, his patience began
to slip. How could she deny him so? After all they’d shared together? He’d
looked after her, visiting her when he’d not been busy with schooling, though
he hadn’t been around for some time now. Surely she hadn’t forgotten him so
soon.

His
eyes fell across her skin. It had been so long since he’d seen the color of her
flesh. Her complexion was a milky color–the lightest, purest, and most
unblemished he could fathom. It was skin that he’d dreamed about for the
longest time.

He’d
had her once before–only once before leaving for his third year at University.
How innocent she was back then… She must have had no idea of what she was
doing, though now surely she understood what they’d done. Perhaps that was why
she was so cold to him now. He’d barely managed to convince her before, only
told her that they were playing a game. She was his doll, and he could position
her as he wished. He had, and the whole of the time she’d kept the same
expression, as though she’d felt nothing
–
not pleasure, not pain,
nothing
.
He’d had the lust for her skin then, and now he felt it once again.

He
held her shoulders tightly and pulled her against him, feeling the warmth of
the blood pumping beneath her skin. He was quickly overwhelmed, lowering his
head to kiss her, pinching the flesh of her lips with his own.

You
will not hide from me
,
he thought spitefully.
You will not escape this
.

Todd
bore down on her against the mattress. She tried to push away, but his grip
held tightly. He tried to keep her restricted, but she managed to escape his
hungry kiss, pulling her head to the side.

“I
won’t,” she said, breathing in the air that was free of his hot breath.

“What?”
he questioned, leaning back a bit to look at her face, but not releasing his
hold on her.

“I
won’t,” she repeated. “Not in front of them. Not again.”

Them?
She was
embarrassed of being watched by lifeless
toys
?

Todd
faltered a moment. Then he pulled back his head and laughed, unable to contain
it. All around the room, tiny eyes watched him, their faces expressionless in
their disapproval. All too suddenly and unnaturally, his amusement turned to
anger. His gaze jerked back to her, flames lapping in his eyes.

“These
things–these
objects–
are more important to you than the living?” he
asked roughly, his voice rising.

Olivia
refused to answer or even look at him then.

“They
aren’t real, Olivia,” he explained, his tone insanely calm. “They aren’t alive
like you and me. They don’t talk, or
breathe
. They don’t have lives to
waste away in a room with toys!”

Todd
pulled himself off of her, striding quickly to the wall shelf to examine the
spread of porcelain–faced dolls. The first that caught his eye was in a green
dress with curly red hair, and he lifted her up carefully, looking into her
green eyes of glass.

“What
has this one told you to call her?” he asked, staring at the doll as if trying
to figure out the answer to the question before she could give it.

“Beth,”
whispered Olivia, staring at Todd with wild eyes like a hunted animal. He liked
that look for her.

“And
what does Beth like?’ he wondered aloud.

Olivia
didn’t speak for a moment, her worried eyes not leaving the doll.

“She
likes tea parties and cakes,” the girl said. That was not the answer he was
looking for.

“
No
!”
Todd shouted, finally losing his temper.

“Don’t
hurt her, please,” Olivia begged, her voice choked.

“Your
friend Beth isn’t real. She’s not alive! She feels
nothing
,” he screamed
at her, not bothering to be gentle.

“Please,
put her down.”

Olivia’s
eyes never left the toy, and Todd, realizing this, stared back at her, lowering
the doll to his side. She wasn’t even listening to him. She was only interested
in the doll, staring at it like it was floating through the air without his
hand’s aid! How could she think this way? What was inside her mind that would
not allow her release from these beliefs?

He
let the doll fall from his grasp then–watched Olivia as her gaze followed it to
the floor. The smooth head hit the wood planks with a thud, but did not break,
and he saw that Olivia was immediately relieved. The girl wrapped her arms
around her legs, resting her chin on her knees, tucking herself away from him.

“Please
leave now,” she urged, shutting him out.

Todd
stood quietly a moment, and then took a few steps toward the door, but his
violent mind got the best of him. He stopped. He had his theories about her
condition, and had his thoughts about how she’d get on the road to recovery. By
taking away her toys, perhaps she would be forced to accept reality and leave
her fantasy world. Yet no one would take her dolls away; it was time someone
did.

Olivia
stared at the wall, not looking toward him as he slowly picked up his foot. He
put the sole of his boot quietly on Beth’s white face, pushing down with the
weight of his leg slowly and carefully, keeping his eyes on Olivia as a soft
cracking sound began to touch his ears.

She
heard it too, her eyes growing wider as she looked towards the floor.

“Please
stop,” she asked him calmly, though her face was full of distress.

Her
voice was firm, almost demanding. The emotion flowing from her eyes was not
able to take over her voice. She stared, glued to the innocent head under the
boot, slowly caving in slightly and unnaturally. He pressed harder.

“Stop…”

The
gentle face split from the forehead to the chin, following along the right
contour of the nose. The crack that had formed then began to grind outward
against itself until finally it caved in completely, cracking off in different
directions and breaking apart into pieces.

Todd
did not try to hide his sadistic smile.

3

The
whole act happened in just a few short seconds, though for Olivia, the ages it
seemed to take as she took in every detail of the horror would always remain with
her. The sound was gradual and light at first, reminding Olivia of the eggs
that were cooked at breakfast time, yet this sound wasn’t pleasing. She knew no
good would come from it. The girl flinched as she watched the doll’s worried
face grow longer beneath his foot, but nothing could drive Olivia to move,
fearing her action would hurt Beth more.

I
cannot save you. I’m so sorry…

After
the final shattering and the horrible sound reached her ears, she turned her
face away from the sight, cringing, unable to look.

“Olivia,”
Todd said, calling for her attention. The sound of his voice sickened her.
“It’s for the best.”