The Perfect Mess

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Authors: K. Sterling

BOOK: The Perfect Mess
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The Perfect Mess

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By

K. Sterling

Chapter 1

 

“Thank you soooo much, Landon!” Lindsey threw an arm around Landon’s neck as she stretched for his cheek. She kissed it loudly then pushed a box against his chest. He frowned as he looked into it.

“Is this everything?” He asked as he stared at bags of bedding, food, various treats and assorted toys. “Hamsters play with toys?” Landon asked as he watched his sister pick up the cage. She laughed as she guided it through the door.

“Molly thinks so,” she said as she looked around the apartment. “Where do you want this?” She asked and Landon shrugged.

“Outside?” He suggested and she rolled her eyes.

“I’ll put her in your office, you’ll enjoy the company,” she said and Landon shrugged again as he followed.

“I don’t have to actually play with it, do I?” He asked as he dropped the box onto the coffee table next to the cage and bent down to look at his guest.

“Just toss one in now and then. I think the variety keeps her life from being one endless cycle of eating, shitting and sleeping,” Lindsey explained and Landon nodded in agreement and secretly, a little sympathy. Lindsey sighed as she stared at the cage. “Molly refused to go on this cruise until you agreed to watch Keith. You saved us, Landon,” she said and he chuckled.

“I’d do anything for Molly. Though I was kind of hoping she’d dig in her heels and I’d get her instead of Keith,” he admitted and Lindsey grinned.

“You’d have ended up with both of them and pulling your hair out in a few days. Enjoy Keith, she’s sweet. But she does likes to run at night and her wheel is obnoxiously loud,” she warned and Landon shook his head.

“That won’t be a problem, I’ll just turn on some music or jump on the treadmill and run with her,” he mumbled and Lindsey nodded as she planted another loud kiss on his cheek.

“That’s what I was thinking, I know you’re up at odd hours and wouldn’t have much going on. I need to go. We have to be at the airport in two hours and I’m sure we’re forgetting a milliondy things,” Lindsey announced as she threw her arms around Landon for a quick hug. “I’ll buy you something tacky!” She promised and Landon nodded then waved as she rushed out the door. He crossed his arms over his chest as he stared at the fat ball of fluff sleeping in its food bowl.

“I could have lots of things going on. She doesn’t know,” he grumbled then his lips pulled tight. “I have nothing going on, Keith,” Landon admitted. He sighed heavily then went around the table and dropped onto the sofa. He propped his elbows on his knees and leaned toward the cage. “Seen anything good on Netflix lately?” He asked.

 

Maybe she’ll like green beans,
Landon shrugged as he tossed a few in a bag then dropped it in his basket. Keith would end up even more spoiled or dead by the time her family returned from their cruise. Landon was a little ashamed to admit that the hamster had been the most entertaining thing to happen to him in years. He’d spent the last week experimenting, gleefully offering random bits of food and making little doodles of Keith’s reactions. Landon was pondering a book titled
Shit Keith Eats
. Then, a follow-up book,
Shit Keith Won’t Eat.
Landon chuckled to himself as he reached for a bunch of bananas.

“Landon!”

He looked around as he placed the bananas in his basket and smiled as Jason Weaver waved and headed in his direction. Landon held out his hand and Jason grinned as he took it.

“I’m so glad I ran into you!” He said and Landon raised a brow. He’d known Jason since college. They were fraternity brothers and had been roommates for three years. Neither cared for the raucous atmosphere in the frat house and had enjoyed a more peaceful existence when they found a place off campus. And Landon knew Jason well enough to know that if he was happy to see someone, it meant he had an ulterior motive.

“What’s up?” Landon asked warily and Jason waved dismissively.

“Nothing bad, I promise!” He said but it didn’t put Landon at ease.

“We’ll see. I have plans, so out with it,” he said and Jason rolled his eyes.

“Whatever. You’re either working, working out or catching up on your ironing,” Jason said and Landon narrowed his eyes.

“You don’t know,” he insisted. “I do…things,” Landon said and Jason looked at him expectantly.

“Do you? What are you doing, then?” He asked and Landon shrugged casually.

“I’m hanging out with Keith tonight,” he said and Jason’s face fell.

“I didn’t know you were dating anyone,” he said and Landon shook his head.

“We’re just friends,” he explained and Jason looked relieved.

“That’s great. I’ve been telling someone about you and he seems really interested. I was planning to call you and give you his number,” he said and Landon shook his head.

“Come on, Jase,” Landon groaned. “You know how much I love it when my friends meet a random gay guy and decide they have to introduce us. I don’t call you every time I meet a straight woman,” he argued and Jason waved his hands in protest.

“It’s not like that, I swear. He’s a great guy. I’ve been seeing his sister and he usually ends up tagging along.” Jason pulled out his phone and started tapping. A moment later, Landon’s phone buzzed in his pocket. He gave Jason a pointed look before he reached into his pocket.

“Ben?” Landon said as he glanced at the phone number Jason sent. “So, you’re dating some chick and she’s got a pain in the ass brother that’s always hanging around and you thought you’d dump him on me?” He asked and Jason shook his head again.

“No! He’s definitely not like that. He’s cool and I love the shit out of him,” Jason insisted and Landon raised a brow. Jason laughed and leaned closer. “He’s kind of overprotective and I wouldn’t mind a little more time alone with Michelle,” he admitted. Landon couldn’t help but give Ben some points. He got the whole overprotective brother thing.

“If he’s so cool, why is he single?” He asked and Jason shrugged.

“Why are you?” Jason asked and Landon’s lips twisted as he considered.

“I just got tired of dating the same immature guy over and over again,” he said and Jason nodded.

“Same with Ben. Michelle said that he’s been in a lot of short relationships but doesn’t have patience for head games,” Jason said and Landon sighed.

“I’m sure he’s great but I’m moving in a few months,” he said and Jason’s brows pulled together.

“What? Why?” He asked and Landon couldn’t help but smile.

“PixelWorks offered me a job. We’re working out my contract and I put my apartment on the market,” Landon said and Jason gasped.

“That’s awesome!” He said then pulled Landon into a quick hug and patted his back. “I mean, it sucks that you’re leaving but that’s great news!” Jason added and Landon nodded.

“It’s kind of insane but I couldn’t be happier. So, it’s probably not a good time for me to start dating. I’m sure Ben’s really cool but what would be the point?” Landon asked and Jason shrugged.

“It’s just a date, Landon. It’s not that serious. Maybe you hit it off and go out a couple of times. Or, it could go nowhere and you just have a few drinks with the guy. What have you got to lose?” He gave Landon a sly look as he leaned closer. “If I were into dudes, I’d think he was really hot. What if you just get lucky a few times before you go?” Jason offered and Landon rolled his eyes.

“Why are you thirty-two and still a man-whore?” Landon asked and Jason laughed.

“Why aren’t you? You’re still single. You can be celibate after you’re married,” he joked and Landon snorted.

“Maybe I should call Ben and warn him,” he said and Jason grinned as he shook his head.

“It’s not necessary this time. I really like Michelle and things are pretty close to perfect. We’ve been dating for almost four months,” he said and Landon pulled his head back in surprise. For as long as he knew Jason, he’d always been a player. He’d date a girl for a few weeks but it never went further. And it never took him long to move on to another girl.

“Wow. Let me know where you’re registering,” Landon murmured and Jason grinned.

“You joke, but I’m actually considering it with her,” he said and Landon’s eyes widened.

“That’s…” Landon had no words. “Something,” he mumbled and Jason nodded in agreement.

“It gets old, doesn’t it? Just dating a lot but being alone most of the time,” Jason said and Landon chewed his lip for a moment.

“I don’t know about the dating a lot part but being alone gets a little old,” he said, mostly to himself and Jason nodded in agreement.

“See? That’s why you should send Ben a text. Just get out and have a little fun before you take off for your dream job. You know you won’t have a life after you get there,” he said and Landon raised a shoulder.

“I’ll think about it. I do have to get going, Keith’s waiting for me,” he said and Jason smiled and grabbed his shoulder.

“Do it!” He insisted as he gave Landon’s shoulder a quick shake before he saluted and took off toward the wine aisle. Landon frowned as he watched Jason go.

“Too bad Keith can’t drink wine. It kind of feels like that sort of night,” he said under his breath as he turned toward the registers.

Chapter 2

 

“For madam, we have a piece of melon, a corner of a cracker and a few oats,” Landon drawled as he placed his smallest saucer in Keith’s cage. “The gentleman will be enjoying the linguine tossed with shrimp and snow peas in a light white wine sauce,” he said as he sat on the floor and grabbed his bowl.

Landon twirled his fork as he watched Keith scurry down a tunnel and roll onto the bedding in her haste to get to her dinner. She quickly worked her way through the melon then blinked up at Landon as she nibbled on an oat. He raised a brow as he stared back.

“I could have gone out tonight, I just didn’t want to,” he said defensively. Keith’s nose twitched before she picked up the piece of cracker. “Don’t judge me, Keith. I chose not to date anyone for the last six months. The last guy was so…” He waved his fork in the air as he searched for the right words. “I don’t want to say childish but he was more into video games and his hair than doing anything interesting or having a conversation with actual substance,” Landon explained. “I’m not holding out for a sensitive artist with soulful eyes or long walks and holding hands or falling asleep in each other’s arms. I’d just like to find someone who can sit through a movie without trying to put his hands down my pants or force me to spend an hour helping him shop for the perfect shirt online. I keep attracting shallow, horny guys that obsess over picking the right outfit. I’m over flashy bars and noisy, crowded clubs,” he explained and Keith shoved the rest of her dinner in her cheeks and ran back into the tunnel that led to her bed. Landon sighed as he set the bowl on the table then fell back onto the floor. “I have missed the hands in my pants lately, if I’m honest. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a hand down there that wasn’t mine,” he admitted.

“What if you just get lucky a few times before you go?”
Jason’s question floated through Landon’s brain and he nodded softly as he considered.

That wouldn’t be terrible and if he was as cool as Jason said, it might not be boring and disappointing. Landon nodded firmly.
Why not? People go on dates just to have a good time. It doesn’t have to mean anything. Even if you don’t get laid, it’s better than spending the night with a hamster. Probably,
he decided as he reached for his phone. He silently prayed that Jason wasn’t trying to unload his girlfriend’s obnoxious, clingy brother. Landon’s eyes narrowed as he considered. Jason might have been a bit of a player but he’d never been an asshole and he’d never screwed Landon over. He took a deep breath as he found Ben’s number and typed a message.

 

Landon

 

Hello, this is Landon. Jason gave me your number and I was wondering if you’d like to meet for drinks sometime.

 

He hit Send and immediately regretted it. He should have waited for Ben to respond before he suggested drinks. That probably sounded too eager. Or desperate. Landon was about to attempt another message, something explaining that he wasn’t eager or desperate when his phone vibrated.

 

Ben

 

That sounds great! Jason keeps talking about you and I was about to text you myself to shut him up.

 

Landon laughed. Jason could be pretty determined once he got hold of an idea.

 

Landon

 

Sorry. You’ll either be sick of me by the time we meet or disappointed. If I know Jason, he’s built me up to be Mr. Perfect.

 

Ben

 

He has but I’m tempering my expectations, he has terrible taste in movies and beer.

 

Landon laughed again. Both were very true.

 

Landon

 

What’s a good night/time for you? I’m pretty much free whenever.

 

He cringed. He was seriously off his game. Landon might as well have put “I’m lonely and desperate”.

 

Ben

 

Are you busy tonight? They’re going to the movies and my sister is begging me to go with them. I tried to lie and say that I had to catch up on my ironing but she isn’t buying it.

 

Landon’s mouth fell open. He fought down a swell of anxiety at the thought of rushing to get ready and Ben’s ironing. It was one thing to have a lot in common but Landon didn’t want to date himself. His eyes flicked to the cage and Keith stared back.

“What do I do?” He asked and Keith blinked several times before she turned her back on Landon and scurried to her water bottle. Landon nodded. “Right. I’ll go out for drinks,” he mumbled.

 

Landon

 

Meet for drinks? There’s a nice bar on Lexington called Frampton’s. Want to meet there?

 

Ben

 

Sure. I’ve wanted to check it out for a while. 8:00 work for you?

 

Landon

 

Perfect. See you at 8:00!

 

Landon groaned. He had a little less than two hours. Luckily, Frampton’s was just a few blocks away. He could walk there in about ten minutes.

 

Ben

 

Sounds great. See you soon.

 

The phone landed on the floor with a soft thud as Landon jumped to his feet and skidded into the hall. Somehow, he was going on a date and he was never going to make it in time.

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