The Price of Falling (4 page)

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Authors: Melanie Tushmore

Tags: #Gay & Lesbian

BOOK: The Price of Falling
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After the shower I dried off and dressed in clean clothes, relieved I felt less tense. The thought that Jason was playing a joke on me did enter my mind. Maybe he figured I wouldn't come back with the money. He may not even be there when I get back, I realized. I grabbed my wallet and keys then hurried back down the stairs.

My sister, Alicia, was near the bottom of the stairs holding what looked like a half empty bowl of popcorn. ‘Aren't you staying?’ she asked.

‘I just-’ I gestured vaguely upstairs. ‘Forgot something. Be back later.’ I smiled at her as I passed, but didn't look directly at her.

‘See you later,’ I heard her say, as I walked through the door as calmly as I could. I climbed back into my car and started the engine, easing it round the circle drive at a normal speed. I didn't want Alicia to hear me burning rubber.

Once on the main road I floored it to get back to Eddy's. I checked my watch a dozen times, trying to work out how long I'd been gone. When I got there and parked I noticed there were more motorbikes now. One of the big guys with a long beard and a bandanna was sitting on one and revving the engine. Other guys stood around him, still with their beers, muttering their appraisal. I edged my way past them and entered the hazy, dim glow of Eddy's once more.

My chest tightened and my heart hammered. I was pleased I hadn't put my sweater back on since I'd changed as I already felt hot. Eddy's was pretty warm anyway but it was busier now; all the pool tables were in use and people were noisier.

I made my way carefully past the tables and guys taking shots, towards where Jason had been. I saw his friends up ahead playing a game but I couldn't see him. As I neared their table they looked up at me. The only one I recognized was the boy who wore a lot of jewellery. He was standing by the table, holding his cue in front of him as another girl took a shot, albeit rather drunkenly.

‘Um, excuse me,’ I asked.

The boy looked at me with a slight frown, probably not remembering me.

‘Is Jason around?’ I asked.

The boy then gave me a smile, and nodded as if to himself. ‘Oh sure,’ he smirked. ‘He's outside.’

I was grateful to get out of the smoky heat into the cool night air. I edged my way past the bikers again at the entrance and walked round the side of the long brick building. The parking space in front was pretty huge, but I figured I'd try at the side of the building first.

When I rounded the corner I felt sure Jason would be down here; it was a typical pot-head hang out. A large alley way was created by the walled side of Eddy's and the closed convenience store nearby. There wasn't as much light down the alley, only a small lamp over a side door, with crates of empty beer bottles piled up. However I could see the small red glow of joints being smoked at the far end of the alley, and made my way down there.

Talking and giggling greeted me as I got closer. I saw Jason sitting on some upturned crates in the dark, with another boy and two girls.

‘Oh look, its Mike!’ a girl's voice drawled, amidst giggling. As I neared them I realized it was Natalie.

‘Hey,’ I greeted, trying to be friendly, but my eyes moved instantly to Jason.

He looked up at me with that sly smile. ‘Didn't think you were coming back,’ he said, seemingly amused. He held a joint in his fingers and brought it up to his lips for a long drag.

‘Well, I have,’ I stated dumbly, not entirely comfortable in front of his friends.

Jason pressed his lips together as he held in his breath, then offered the joint to me. I'd never smoked a joint before and still wasn't keen to try it.

‘Oh, no thanks,’ I told him.

I heard one of his friends snicker. Jason blew out plumes of smoke and gave a small laugh. He handed the joint to the other boy and muttered something quietly. The boy laughed and started smoking the joint himself.

‘You joining us, Mike?’ Natalie asked me.

‘Er, no thanks,’ I replied. ‘I've got to go but...’

I had no idea what I was saying.

I looked to Jason again. ‘I wanted to ask you about...that thing.’

‘What thing?’ Jason smiled up at me, obviously enjoying watching me struggle. I knew he was teasing me, but I didn't care. If I persisted then at least I would get an answer.

‘That thing you asked for,’ I replied, not caring that his friends were listening. I met his gaze and silently willed him to stop playing with me.

Jason still smiled, then made an exaggerated O-shape with his mouth, as he pretended to suddenly remember. ‘Ohh, right.
That
thing.’ He chuckled to himself as he looked around the ground. ‘Where's my beer?’

I watched as he grabbed a beer bottle and stood up, looking a little unsteady on his feet. He walked right past me and didn't wait. I blindly followed him, hearing a faint ‘See ya, Mike,’ from Natalie.

Jason took a long swig from his beer as he slowly walked towards the glow of the lights from Eddy's.

I caught up with him and asked, ‘Where are we going?’

My eyes were drawn to his mouth as he drank the liquid. Jason lowered the bottle from his lips and wiped a hand across them before he replied. ‘Your car.’

With the strange sensation in my stomach once again, I led the way through the lot. In the dim light I kept looking back to check Jason was actually following me. I was terrified and thrilled at the same time. When we reached my car I went around to the driver’s side and waited. Jason leant back to look at the model with a slight frown.

‘What?’ I asked, puzzled.

‘Nothin',’ he smiled, hand grabbing at the door. I watched him get in at the passenger side then quickly followed. With the doors shut, inside the dark car I looked at Jason, the orange glow from a lot lamp high above our only light.

He shifted in his seat and held out his hand to me. ‘Let's see it then, jock.’

Assuming he meant the money, I pulled my wallet out and handed over my wad of notes. Jason took them and, balancing his beer precariously on my car's gear box, proceeded to slowly count the money.

‘Alright,’ he declared, folding the notes he tucked them into his jacket. He sat back and picked up his beer again, waiting for me. ‘Go on, then.’

I blinked. ‘Er...?’

Jason gestured at the steering wheel with a sweeping hand. ‘Drive. You know, go some place.’

‘We're not staying here?’

My question was met with a withering look, like a child might do to his parent.

‘OK,’ I sighed, starting the engine. ‘Where are we going?’

‘Go up to the cliff at West Wood.’

‘That's miles out,’ I protested, not sure what I'd gotten myself into.

‘Won't take long in this car,’ Jason smiled at me. ‘I want to drive up to the cliff.’

I knew there was no point arguing; he had me doing everything else he said anyway, why stop now?

I drove on the main road towards the edge of town. Jason distracted me by rummaging through the glove compartment.

‘I can't believe you don't have any music,’ he complained. ‘What’s the point having a stereo like this with no tapes?’ He turned his attention to the radio instead, switched it on and messed around with the dials. I heard the station I usually tuned in to disappear as crackles and the odd burst of random song offended my ears.

‘What are you doing?’ I muttered, trying to concentrate on the road.

‘Relax, jock,’ he teased. ‘I'm just finding somethin' cool.’

I was thrilled at having Jason in my car, the energy that came from having him here messing up my equilibrium was a rush. I gripped the steering wheel tightly and accelerated. Now the radio was tuned into a station Jason approved of he sat back and drank his beer, opening his window down. The cool breeze rushing into the car was a welcome sensation.

As we reached the edge of town and started up the dark main road towards West Wood a new song started. Jason flew forward and twisted the volume up to what seemed like a horrific level. ‘Shouldn't you turn that down?’ I shouted over the swirls of dramatic keyboards and electronic undertones.

‘What?’ Jason laughed at me. ‘We're in the middle of nowhere! Anyway, this band rule.’

I glanced either side of the road in the darkness, the silhouettes of trees rushing past. I worried about the loud noise we made as we sped towards the cliff, but I was equally enthralled by this burst of energy from Jason. I had never seen him get excited about anything before, except maybe the pin ball machine.

‘Who is it?’ I asked, having to shout.

‘Depeche Mode,’ he laughed at me, swaying in his seat to the music as he swigged back more beer.

I stared ahead at the road, smiling to myself a little. It was an alright song, the dramatic chords building up around the singer's voice seemed to sit well with the darkness and creepy shadows of the trees.

I wasn't normally keen on woods in the dark, it just made me think of urban legends about murderers. When we came off the main road onto the dirt track to the cliff I turned the volume right down on the radio. I didn't want to announce to the whole mountainside that we were here.

Jason snickered. Either it was the effects of the pot or he was laughing at me again.

‘What?’ I asked, trying to glance at him while carefully navigating the car up the dark, unmarked track.

‘No-one's out here, jock. You can relax.’

‘We're out here,’ I countered, staring ahead at the track. We were climbing upwards, trees on one side and mountain brush on the other. I knew under the bushes was nothing more than a sheer drop to the ground below. It made me nervous.

Jason's snicker turned into a snort of laughter. ‘Yeah, we are. Glad we got that covered.’

Instead of answering, I simply took in a deep breath of air and exhaled slowly. I thought if I didn't rise to his goading that would be the simplest way forward. But Jason soon found another way to panic me, as he stuck his head and shoulders out his window and leaned out of the car. My heart skipped a beat and I slowed the car as much as I could.

‘What are you doing?! Get back in!’

‘Why you slowing down?’ Jason asked over his shoulder, voice snatched away by the wind.

‘'Cause you're hanging out of my car!’ I replied, flustered. I brought the car to a stop, jolting him slightly. The bottle of beer he was still carrying spilled a few drops of froth on my car and him. Jason sat back down in his seat and rolled his eyes, wiping the beer off his jacket.

‘Alright, alright. Jeez, man...’

‘Will you put your seatbelt on?’ I asked.

Jason slouched down in his seat like a petulant child. ‘No,’ he said, pointedly. ‘Look, will you hurry up already? We're almost there if you'd stop driving like an old lady.’

I didn't see the point in arguing with Jason, but what seemed perfectly normal to him was reckless to me. I'd started to worry he was going to have some sort of accident whilst we were up here; when we arrived at the make-shift parking area by the rangers cabin he opened the door before I even stopped the car. He hopped out with barely a stumble, heading back towards the dirt track.

I didn't bother parking properly, just yanked up the hand break and cut the engine. Once the headlights were out there was only the blue-white tint from the moon allowing me to see. I jumped out, shutting my door and his that he'd left open, following him at a jog.

‘Where are you going?’ I hissed.

Jason glanced back over his shoulder as I approached. I could see him reasonably well in the night light, and saw another withering look for my benefit. ‘Why are you whispering? There's no-one here!’

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