The Price of Falling (8 page)

‘No.’

I was so encouraged by his first proper answer that I kept talking, stupidly. ‘I know it was a lame film, but it must be good to learn about your history?’

‘What history?’

‘Er, yours? The um, Scottish revolt, thing...’

‘I'm not Scottish,’ Jason said, razor edge creeping into his voice.

Again, too excited by the fact we were talking I couldn't stop myself as the words  kept falling out of my mouth. ‘So you're Irish?’

‘No,’ Jason replied, as if I'd asked the dumbest question in the world. ‘I'm all-American just like you, jock.’

‘But you look so-’ I stopped myself. I wasn't sure what I'd been about to say anyway.

‘What?’

‘Well, your hair,’ I explained weakly. ‘I mean your name, it's Irish-American then? It can't
not
be.’

When I risked a glance at him I saw he was glaring at me. ‘What is this, twenty questions?’

‘No, I...’

‘Why d’you wanna know?’

‘I don’t,’ I back-tracked quickly, ‘I was just trying to talk.’

‘Yeah well, don’t.’ Jason snapped before turning away again.

I hated to bother him when I’d obviously made him angry, but I didn’t know where he wanted me to go. I had to ask for directions, and he gave them like a sulky teenager might give his parent.

I kept my mouth shut the rest of the way. He’d directed me over to what my Mom would have called ‘the cheap side of town.’ It was all small houses and beat up old cars on the patchy front yards.

The house Jason pointed out had definitely seen better days. There weren’t as many street lamps out here and the road was a little darker than I was used to. As we stopped in front of his house I saw inside was one low light burning behind a dingy brown drape, with the odd flash of what must be a TV. I wondered who it was, Jason’s mother or father maybe? I didn’t dare ask since I’d obviously annoyed him.

I left the engine running and waited for his move. I felt really weird, I didn’t like upsetting people.

Jason also looked restless; he'd glanced at the house then at me when we stopped. He definitely seemed pissed enough to storm out and slam the door on me, which I was in all honestly expecting him to do. But instead he stared at the radio for a few moments. I had turned it down quiet when we’d entered the small street. It was playing a song I didn’t recognize, again.

Jason huffed out a sigh, then said, ‘This is my aunt’s house. There's no Irish or anything else on this side of the family. In fact, she's all that's left of both sides, and she's a bible-bashing nut.’

‘Oh,’ I replied, taken aback.

‘See? It’s not great conversation.’

‘I’m sorry,’ I said, feeling embarrassed.

‘Doesn't matter,’ Jason shrugged. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t forget what you owe me.’

‘Sure,’ I said, as he got out of the car. I was about to say more but he slammed the door more quickly than I’d anticipated.

I watched him walk up to the door and disappear inside. He did glance over his shoulder as he went in. I felt really weird at having annoyed him. I hoped he wouldn’t still be mad at me tomorrow.

When I counted out my cash the next morning I realized still mad or not, Jason now wanted something from me. He wanted this cash. My fingers leafed through the notes as I thought of the sudden power shift. But how could I work this to get what I wanted?

If I really thought about it, I wasn’t entirely sure what I wanted. I couldn’t really put it into words, I just wanted more. Instead of putting only the hundred dollars in my wallet, I put the whole lot in. That was three hundred and forty-five dollars, my whole shoe-box savings. If I had a problem with my car any time soon I’d be screwed.

But this was what he wanted. I had something to bargain with surely. I wasn’t totally convinced I was smart enough to pull this off, but I was sure as hell gonna try.

Typically, by the end of the week Jason would manage to make it in to school on time to attend morning registration. As it was Friday, I was pretty confident he would make an appearance. The bell rang and the final stragglers hurried into class.

I was right, Jason also sauntered in. He glanced at me once, probably to check I was there. My lips rose in an automatic smile, but he didn’t smile back. I couldn’t figure him out.

Mr. Thompson bored us through the morning announcements, reminding me about the impending football game next week, then started his History lesson. I took up my usual position of resting my head on my hand, which would look like I was studiously taking notes, when really I was able to look at Jason.

I noticed for once he wasn’t slouched back in his seat, but leaning forward and writing –possibly just scribbling- something. The scruffy t-shirt he was wearing had rode up, exposing a flash of skin between it and the waist band of his jeans. I felt like I was seeing something private, and couldn’t stop myself wondering if that skin felt soft.

‘Well?!’ shouted Mr. Thompson, obviously waiting for the answer to his ignored question.

I panicked as I looked up, but thankfully realized he wasn’t speaking to me.

‘If you’re going to day dream in my class, James Howard, I suggest you get better grades first!’

I was relieved it was another student Mr. Thompson was chewing out. I would definitely have blushed if I’d been the centre of attention after being disturbed from thoughts like...that.

I looked down at my paper in a bid to concentrate not on Jason, but on what I was going to do. I could picture what I wanted now, at least this time. I just hoped I was clever enough to talk him into it.

When the bell rang, finally, everyone rose to bustle out to the corridor. I picked my way through the students, nearer to Jason. He looked up at me as I approached, but just as I opened my mouth Mr. Thompson called, ‘Jason Reilly, see me please!’

Jason rolled his eyes. ‘Wait for me,’ he said quietly.

It wasn’t a question, but an order. Time to put my plan into action.

‘I can’t,’ I answered, ‘I’ll be late for class.’

Jason frowned at me slightly. ‘Come find me at lunch then.’

‘Where?’

‘Jason, if you please,’ called Mr. Thompson. I knew that was also anyone else’s cue to leave.

‘Behind the library,’ Jason whispered to me as he stalked off to Mr. Thompson’s desk. I hurried out of the room and looked back before Mr. Thompson shut the door. Jason was standing at our teacher’s desk holding his books in front of him, looking back at me. He seemed a lot less harsh to me all of a sudden, now I knew a little more.

I wondered if Mr. Thompson had any idea about the way Jason lived. If he did, it might give him a better view to understanding why some kids had other things to worry about than school. I could hear Mr. Thompson’s booming voice through the door as I hovered there.

‘Now Jason, why am I still getting reports of poor attendance? What did we discuss previously...’ He droned on. I guessed there wasn’t much point in me staying. I could have hung back to meet Jason, he was obviously eager to get his money. But a quick exchange out in the corridor wasn’t what I had in mind.

I was tense through the rest of my morning lessons. Thankfully Jason wasn’t in any of them. I rehearsed again and again in my head what I planned to say, and do. I found now that I was focusing on what I wanted, I could plot a course of action to get it. Just like a game plan, I grinned to myself.

When lunch came I was too nervous to eat, but I sat with my friends as usual and drank a carton of milk. I acted like nothing was out of the ordinary. I half listened to Allen and Johnny bragging about whatever it was this time, but I was keeping an eye on the clock. When lunch was fifteen minutes in, I thought this was the right time.

‘I forgot,’ I said to Johnny, patting him on the shoulder as I got up. ‘I’ve gotta turn this over-due paper in. I’ll catch you later.’

‘OK, dude,’ Johnny waved absently.

My excuse, I thought, was flawless. As jocks we were pretty much all behind in one subject or another, because we either didn’t care or didn’t understand.

A couple of the girls tried to talk to me on the way out of the cafeteria, but I made my excuses.

‘I’ll be back like, real soon,’ I promised, without slowing down.

I was worried at twenty minutes and counting that maybe I’d played it a little too cool. But when I made it round the back of the library and saw Jason waiting, I breathed a sigh. It was pretty quiet round here, and he was obviously making use of the privacy by smoking a cigarette as he leaned against the wall. When he saw me approaching he threw the cigarette on the ground and stepped forward.

‘You took your sweet time,’ he complained.

I stopped in front of him and smiled. Perhaps I would be better at this than I thought. Stick to the game plan.

‘Sorry, I got held up,’ I apologized.

‘Yeah, whatever. Hand it over, I gotta go.’ Jason held out his hand, probably expecting me to swiftly obey his order.

‘Sure,’ I said, but didn’t go for my wallet. I stayed still, tried to act casual. ‘I just wanna talk.’

Jason looked at me incredulously. ‘I ain’t got time to talk, jock,’ he said, irritated already. ‘Give me the cash and I’ll talk to you another time.’

I took in his words, his reaction. I forced myself to stay calm. I knew I had the upper hand this time, and it relaxed me because I knew Jason wasn’t going to suddenly leave. Not while I had what he wanted.

I said calmly, ‘But I want to talk to you now.’

Jason lowered his hand. I felt that was definitely points to me. He was still frowning though.

‘What, then? And be quick.’

Before I replied I gave a glance to the side, to make sure no-one else was within hearing distance. Some large green bushes provided privacy from the path. Satisfied no-one else was about, I turned back to Jason. I couldn’t quite look him in the eye as I replied, ‘I want to talk about next time.’

‘Next time?’ Jason snapped. ‘Next time you’ll pay cash up front
if
you even get that lucky.’

‘Tonight.’

That was my one word response. I dared to look up at him. Jason looked me dead in the eye, still incredulous. ‘I don’t have time for this. Just give me what you owe me.’

‘Not yet.’

He held me in his gaze, those green eyes burned into me. I had to admit I was thrilled from purely standing up to him but I didn’t know how long I could hold out before I gave in.

‘Are you trying to stiff me, jock?’

‘No way,’ I assured him, finally seeing a chance to explain. ‘If you see me tonight, I’ll give it to you then. And a whole lot more.’

This got his attention. I watched his face as the angry glare disappeared, he was still frowning but now in confusion. We simply looked at each other for a long moment. I was determined not to back down, if I could just hang on.

‘What do you want?’ he asked quietly.

I breathed in to steady myself before I answered. ‘The same. But, longer.’

‘Longer? What do you mean?’

‘I’ll show you tonight.’

‘You ain’t showing me shit,’ Jason snapped. ‘What the hell, longer? What do you fucking mean?’

‘Twice,’ I said, swallowing. I was trying to remain calm but I was getting panicked by his reactions.