The Private Stable [Iron Spur Ranch 1] (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour) (14 page)

“Now what?” he asked. Ethan was a mess, not sure what path was right. Wyatt believed he was acting in lust, chasing after the first woman to show him interest. But in truth, half the clients at the private stable would have welcomed him with open arms. He had no interest in any of them. If he talked to Wyatt about love at first sight, he’d probably kick him right out of the trailer, claiming he’d lost his mind.

Were his budding emotions derived from loneliness? Was he longing for companionship? Or did he need to fill a void after losing his family and most of his friends?

Was it love?

“Will you go back to ignoring me?”

“No, not that. That was wrong of me, and I know it.” He was ashamed of his behavior. He should have followed his own instincts, not allowed himself to become influenced by Wyatt and Colton.

Even with his cock now semiflaccid, he wanted to stay connected, to look into her eyes and guess her thoughts.

“I’m scared,” she admitted, sparking his interest.

“What on earth for?”

He could hear her swallow. “I’m broken, Ethan, right down the middle. As much as I like our brief encounters, I can’t keep doing this forever.”

“I want to give you more, honest I do, darlin’. I see the sun rise in your eyes. But I’m not sure you’ll want me once you peel back all the layers.”

Rachel didn’t know he was a murderer, the taker of life. Only a few of the cowboys on the ranch gave him the time of day now. How would a delicate flower like Rachel react to such news? She’d no doubt run in distaste, barely able to stand the sight of him. He was used to the whispers, the glares, and the gossip. It was a part of his life ever since that night at the bar he couldn’t undo. He’d lost too much sleep to count, replaying that day over and over in his head. If only…

Rachel was his chance at redemption. She didn’t know about his ugly past, but the other cowboys would surely enlighten her, anything to ruin his happiness. Was it even worth the risk?

“You’ve never hurt me, never raised your voice or hand.”

“Well, of course not. A man is supposed to protect his woman, to love her until the day he dies. My parents have been married over thirty years, and my dad still worships the ground she walks on.”

“Then you’ve had a good example, even more reason to invest in you.”

“What about secrets?” he asked.

“Everyone has them, right?”

He reluctantly eased out of her and lowered her to her feet. Ethan zipped up his jeans and leaned over to pick up her shirt. “Not like mine.”

As she dressed, she kept quiet. Too quiet. What was she thinking? Did she believe he used her for sex? She meant more to him than just cheap thrills.

“I have secrets, too, Ethan,” she said plainly. “But I’m still willing to risk giving you my heart, even with the possibility you’ll tread on it. Without risks how can you ever reap the benefits?”

He raked his hands through her hair, tilting her head back. “You’re either poison or my saving grace. I’m not sure yet.” He rested his forehead against hers, enjoying the closeness. “Tell me your secret, Rachel.”

She shook her head.

Ethan insisted. “Tell me if you’re so willing to risk everything.”

Rachel was at a crossroad. Only last week she’d been trapped in a living nightmare, walking on eggshells to keep her boyfriend’s rage at bay. Now she was free, learning about herself,
her
likes, and
her
desires. It was liberating. She also faced new, powerful emotions. Rachel wasn’t sure she’d recognize real love when it struck. Was she in a rebound period? In love with the new attention? Or did both her and Ethan’s hearts beat to the same rhythm?

She wanted to believe it existed, that fabled love at first sight. But in the city, when all that seemed to matter was pushing, shoving, and the almighty dollar, her faith in fairy tales had slowly died down to an ember. Now it was roaring to life.

“Go on, tell me,” he urged. If she wanted something serious and lasting, he’d find out about her past eventually. Rachel was embarrassed she’d put up with an abusive man for so many years. She’d been trapped in a cycle, unable to break free. Being away from Jason reset her perspective and logical thought. She could never return to her old life.

“You know my big secret…”

There was a slight pause, until he got the gist of her meaning. “You’re not a professional horse handler?”

She nodded her head in confirmation.

“I kind of guessed that on the first day, darlin’.” He smirked, an adorable tilt of the lips. “It’s just like any trade—inexperience shows.”

“Well, there’s a reason for it. I–I was running from something.
From someone
.”
She took a cleansing breath. “My ex wasn’t good to me, Ethan. Nothing like how your dad treats your mom.”

He frowned. “What’re you saying? Did he hurt you?” Ethan gripped her shoulders in a too-tight hold. His eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Those cuts on your face weren’t from a cat, were they?”

“I don’t own a cat.” Why lie? Part of her wanted his pity, maybe his protection. Even more so, Rachel wanted to be accepted for who she was, all she was.

He slammed the heel of his hand against the wood near her head. “And here I go ignoring you for three days. What kind of asshole am I?”

“You didn’t know, and besides, it’s the past now. I want nothing to do with the past anymore.”

“You and me both.”

The doors of a pickup truck slammed on the other side of the wooden boards. She could hear Wyatt’s voice and another man’s. Her body went rigid the moment she heard his deep baritone.

“Does he affect you that much?” he whispered, looking at her curiously.

“He hasn’t said a word to me in days. I think he’d be happier if I left the ranch.”

“It doesn’t matter what he wants. Do you want to stay?”

Rachel had so much soul searching to do. Every night she traveled through the past, tried to dissect the present, and dreamed of the future. But she was still more confused than ever. Part of her wanted to get away from the Iron Spur Ranch before she became irrevocably heartbroken. There was no way her fragile self-esteem could handle casual encounters with no commitment. She wanted it all.

But another, stronger part of her wanted to stay. Isabella was supportive of her, and she was learning more and more each day about horsemanship. In no time, she’d be an old pro, never needing to ask for help. She’d planned to come temporarily, to save up enough money to start over somewhere new. Why not here? If Ethan’s claims were true, she wanted to explore their relationship, not cut it off before it had a chance to mature. This could be her new reality, a place she could truly belong. She adored the horses, loved the land, and her heart spelled out two names. Over the past few days she thought she’d lost both men, but perhaps Ethan still had a fire burning for her. Why couldn’t she stop obsessing over the one who got away?

“I only want to stay if I’m wanted.”

“
I
want you. Isn’t that enough?”

Before she could answer, Wyatt’s shadow darkened the room further. He stood in the doorway, his large frame blocking the entrance. “Shouldn’t you be working? Both of you?”

How could he be so cold and callous, as if nothing ever happened between them? She desperately wanted him to comfort her, to tell her he loved her. Rachel wanted his approval, to follow his orders and make him proud. She didn’t want to be another employee to him. Rachel wanted to be
his
woman. In fact, she wanted to explore a ménage relationship because the two men shared her so naturally. But Wyatt only stepped aside for them to pass, not making any attempts at reconciliation. Her heart tore another degree.

* * * *

Wyatt had warned Ethan about falling for Ms. Price. He was young and impulsive, likely thinking with his cock more than his head. The scent of sex had been strong in the room, and Wyatt wasn’t unaffected. As much as he tried to stay away and return to his normal routine, he couldn’t stop thinking of Rachel. But he was no good for her, and he wouldn’t promise her a commitment he couldn’t follow through on.

Ethan was behind on his workload, taking extra time with his trainee. Now he bounded off into the fields to help the other cowboys bring selected stock to new pasture. Wyatt had started to walk away, not willing to stay in the presence of temptation for longer than necessary, when he heard Damien’s voice behind him.

“I’m taking a ride. Can you bring me my gelding? He’s the black Arabian in the center of the paddock.”

He turned to find his boss addressing Ms. Price. She wasn’t Wyatt’s business. He should just keep walking, but he stopped and watched anyway.

Rachel’s face blanched, but she complied, opening the gate and entering the paddock alone. She’d learned a lot since her training started, but Wyatt was no fool. The girl knew less about horses than men. And sending her into the full paddock to collect Damien’s temperamental gelding was a bad idea.

Why the fuck did his heart race? She wasn’t his concern. He watched in horror as the other horses converged on her. She was so tiny, he could barely see her in the midst of the growing herd.
Come on, darlin’. Just grab the halter and be done with it.
He was in that corral in spirit, wishing he could take her place.

The moment she screamed, he was over the rail fence before he could think straight. He had the horses scattered, Damien’s horse in hand, and Rachel by his side.

“Hush now. Don’t look so surprised, the boss is watching.”

She looked close to tears, her chest rising and falling rapidly. He was surprised how rewarding it was to be her protector.

Wyatt walked the Arabian to Damien, who waited at the gate. His boss stroked the animal, looking at it while speaking to him. “I asked Rachel to get the horse for me. Isn’t that what I’m paying her for?”

“And I helped. No harm done.”

“There is when a handler can’t even control a few horses around her. Fear is a dangerous thing on a ranch like this.”

Damien and the crew considered Wyatt fearless. Maybe he was. There wasn’t an animal alive that intimidated him, and he was always ready for the most challenging jobs, no matter how much risk was involved. But he did know fear. Fear of loneliness. Fear of growing old alone. As much as his personal fears paralyzed him at times, he accepted them as unavoidable facts, things as unchangeable as the wind.

“I’ve already taken responsibility for her,” he said.

“And how long do you plan on babysitting?”

He glanced to the side to find Rachel watching. “Until she’s on her own and not coddled by Bella.” He chose his words wisely, purposely using Isabella’s improper name to get Damien off his back. A deep-seated resentment still festered inside him ever since Rachel had started living under the boss’s roof, rather than his. But it was his own damn fault. Wyatt had no one else to blame but the man in the mirror.

Damien said nothing, only glared at him for an hour-long minute before leaving with his horse. He could feel the disapproval roll off him in waves.

“Thank you,” said Rachel. “I don’t know why they came after me like that.”

It was good to hear her address him. How could he miss a woman he barely knew? He wasn’t sure, but the sound of her voice soothed him like a lullaby. Wyatt approached her, speaking slowly, enunciating his words carefully. “It’s your scent. It’s sweet and tempting. The horses just wanted a little treat.”

“How did you get them to move away?”

“You can’t be afraid. You have to own the situation, know you’re in charge and in control. The moment you show your fear, you’ve lost. Animals can sense it, and they’ll lose respect for you if you don’t master them first.”

He desired to master the sweet little brunette. He craved to see and feel her lush curves, to hear her feminine moans in his trailer once again. He’d been battling his twisted desires for several nights. Wyatt kept imagining Rachel in the private stable, submitting to his control like an animal to its master. But she didn’t belong in that world any more than he belonged in hers. They were opposites, two people best kept apart.

“I wish I could get them to scatter with a word like you can.”

“Some people just aren’t meant to be in control.” His cock hardened, his heart rate increasing rapidly. “Some like to be on the receiving end, to be dominated.”

“I guess.”

She was fidgeting, twisting between his arms. He hadn’t even realized he’d caged her in against the fence, their bodies nearly touching. What was he doing?

“What about you, little lamb? Do you crave to submit?”

“I–I don’t know. What does that even mean?”

He knew he should walk away, but he didn’t. Instead, he reached around and cupped one of her ass cheeks, squeezing as he pulled her closer. Her stomach slammed into his rigid cock, making his eyes briefly close. The rush of forbidden, erotic energy was intoxicating. He wanted nothing more than to have her alone in his trailer.

“I’d tie you up so you couldn’t use your hands or feet. You’d be completely naked and exposed for me in the most vulnerable way. Then I’d blindfold you so all you could do was feel and enjoy. You’d have to trust me completely, know that everything I did was to bring you pleasure. And I’d expect you to obey all my commands without question.”

Her mouth parted slightly before she spoke. “I don’t think I could ever trust a person that much.”

“Why not?”

“Because my trust is shattered. It’s beyond repair.”

He shook his head, briefly glancing to the sides to ensure they were alone. “That wasn’t me, baby girl. Don’t judge me by another man’s mistakes.” Wyatt couldn’t keep his hands to himself, not when Rachel was so damn curvy, the ultimate male fantasy. He slipped his hands under her shirt and fondled her soft breasts, waiting for her reaction. When he began to pay special attention to her beaded nipples, she exhaled, her body losing its rigidity.