The Problem With Jordan (7 page)

“Relax, Jordan. I know this is new to you,” he softly stated. “We’ll go slowly.”

“I don’t know what to expect exactly. I’m afraid it will hurt.” Jordan looked at him questioningly.

“I won’t lie to you, honey. There is some pain involved, but it isn’t all that much. If you feel discomfort, then you need to tell me and we’ll stop until you are ready to move forward. I won’t rush you.”

“All right,” she timidly agreed. “I want to make love; I want to have a real marriage like Alice and Jim have.”

“I want to make love to you and have you for my beloved wife. Our marriage will be real in every way, and I will cherish you. There is no need for fear, Jordan. I am not some clumsy schoolboy who would rush you and hurt you. We are married, and I have seen how wonderful you are with children. You have no worries of becoming pregnant and abandoned. I want a family, and I give you my word to care for you always.”

“Some women might take a promise like that for granted, but I don’t,” she stated. “I’ve never had a lot of security. Aunt Hermione did the best she could, but it was never enough. Cray, you make me feel safe, and I trust you with my life. I’m sorry for fussing right now.”

“Honey, if you weren’t having a bit of a fuss, I would think you’d done this before, and that would worry me a lot.” He smiled at her. “You are so beautiful and I am proud to be your husband. I can see why the townspeople love you so much that they would pick a husband for you in hopes that you would be safe.”

“They chose well,” she said with an answering smile.

“Yes, they did!” he agreed, and then kissed her. Jordan kissed him back and he decided it was time to show her what kissing led to.

Jordan’s head was spinning with so many emotions. Her body was quivering with need just from the kisses he plied her with. “Cray!” she gasped when his hand gently caressed her breast, causing her nipple to harden with pleasure. “Oh, Cray! You are making me crazy!”

“Crazy good?” He wanted to know.

“Oh yes!” She moaned as he made her other nipple come to life.

“My shy bride, would you undress for me, please?” He watched her cheeks bloom with color and he smiled encouragingly. “It would give me pleasure, sweetheart.”

“It’s daylight!” she whispered.

“Making love in the daytime is allowed, Jordan. It adds to the pleasure.”

“Really?” she asked doubtfully.

“Really,” he insisted. “It will be wonderful to watch you undress for me.”

“If I undress for you, will you undress for me?” she asked, positive he would say no.

“Of course I will undress for you. I want to please you, sweetheart.”

It wasn’t the answer she expected, but she could see he was earnest. Swallowing hard, Jordan unfastened her skirt and stepped out of it. She then removed her shirtwaist, and saw his eyes darken a bit with passion. Feeling more confident, she removed her petticoats and her stockings. When she was clad in nothing but her drawers and her camisole, Jordan’s shyness took over and she couldn’t do anything more. “I can’t,” she whispered.

“You did well, honey. It would give me pleasure to take over now, if that is agreeable to you?”

“It is,” she agreed. Cray slowly untied the ribbon on her camisole and permitted it to fall open, revealing her breasts, which were already swollen. Her nipples were still hard, and now that Cray was looking at her, they hardened even more. Jordan found that rather than being uncomfortable, his gaze excited her. She could see that he liked what he was looking at.

Cray reached for the ribbon holding up her drawers, and untied them with one quick pull. They fell to the floor in a puddle around her ankles. “You are simply beautiful, Jordan.” He removed his shirt, and then his pants. His socks were next, and then his drawers followed, revealing his manhood, which was hard as could be and was standing upright.

“Oh my stars!” Jordan whispered, staring at him. “You are large, Cray!”

“I know I am, but that will give you more pleasure,” he promised.

“How?” It was an honest question. “I’m afraid it will hurt, or even tear me inside,” she admitted.

“I won’t hurt you, honey. I’m asking you to trust me.”

Jordan nodded. “You are right to ask for my trust. You’ve kept your word on every promise you’ve made me, and I do trust you, Cray. I want more than anything to be your wife and to have a real marriage.”

“I want to be your husband, too.” Cray easily picked her up and laid her down on the bed and then joined her. “You are so beautiful, honey. The men around here were blind not to see that.”

Jordan giggled. “I don’t know how you could see the woman inside those britches and Pa’s coat. I kept everyone at arm’s length because I knew they didn’t have marriage in mind, and Aunt Hermione said a girl’s innocence could only be given one time and I was to give it to a man I could love, trust, and respect. You are that man, Cray.”

“Thank you, sweetheart.”

Cray was aware of the gift he was being given, and he was careful as he initiated her into the most pleasant part of marriage. Jordan let go of her fear and gave herself up to pleasing and being pleased. Cray was gentle with her and the pleasure they shared was exquisite. Jordan was pleased when Cray held her afterwards, stroking her back and reassuring her that he was more than pleased.

“Thank you for being so kind to me and for putting me before yourself. I will never forget this moment, husband. It was so special and I can’t find words to express how lucky I feel right now. You gave me everything and even more.” She snuggled closer, if that was possible.

“Jordan, making love to you was special for me, too. I don’t say this to upset you, but it has never been like this before. I’ve never been in love before, and I am in love with you, completely in love. I was devastated when I realized you’d left me. Not because I feel as though I own you, or because I am responsible for your safety, but because I do love you and I wanted you to love me, too. I just picked a damn fool way to show you that,” he admitted.

“We should have talked. I was wrong to assume things and to run away.”

“I was wrong to think I needed to stay away from you. Yes, we should have talked.”

“Are you hungry? I just realized the time, and I am starving again!”

“I have a big appetite right now,” Cray agreed. “Come on, and I’ll give you a hand in the kitchen.” He held out his hand to help her up, and heard her gasp as her bottom made contact with the mattress as she moved. He looked for himself and was surprised to see how sore she looked. “Your poor butt is well smacked, wife.”

“I know. I hurt something awful.”

“I didn’t want you to leave and shut me out of your life,” he explained. “I felt passionately about that, and took it out on your sweet bottom.”

“The least you could do would be to put some pillows on my chair.”

“Will you promise not to run away again, but to come to me and talk about whatever it is that is causing you to think of running away?”

“Yes, I promise,” she said, meaning the words as she carefully pulled her drawers over her blazing bottom. It was still burning like he’d just stopped spanking her!

“Then I will grant your wish, princess,” he said in a teasing voice. Cray was already dressed and he left the room, taking their pillows with them to make her chair comfortable. He thought it a small price to pay for her willingness to overlook his clumsy way of telling her how much he loved her. He was a happy man, and he wanted to make her happy, too.

When he saw her sewing machine, he was reminded that she hadn’t come to him and told him she needed to do some shopping. When she joined him in the kitchen, he was standing there holding a wooden spoon in his hand. Her green eyes grew even larger. “When are you going to accept that my money is your money?”

“Now that I know we are truly married it is different, Cray. I can buy some yard goods now without feeling guilty. I just needed to know we were really going to be together forever before I could take from you. I know you said I could, but I couldn’t bring myself to do that. It almost felt like you were buying me.”

“I didn’t mean for you to feel that way.”

“I’m sure you didn’t.”

She quickly prepared food, but sitting, even on the two pillows he placed on her chair, proved to be difficult. Jordan ate as quickly as possible, anxious to get to her feet. When she looked at Cray, she was surprised to see him trying to hide a smile from her. “You are laughing at me!” she accused. “It’s not funny, Cray!”

“Your fair skin makes a spanking worse,” he insisted, and then added, “I will need to remember that and not be so firm when it isn’t necessary.” He rose and helped her with the dishes. “I was going to offer to take you to town this afternoon, but it’s easy to see that sitting on the wagon seat would be too painful for you.”

The problem with Jordan was that she lost her temper when she felt she was being made fun of, and that prompted her to throw the wet dishcloth at him, smacking him full in the face. “You know I can’t sit, Cray, and it is mean for you to tease me like that!” She stomped into the bedroom and was about to slam the door when all she could see was how they’d made love so passionately. She couldn’t be in that room right now. It hurt her feelings that he was making fun of her.

When she turned to leave the room, he was standing there, blocking her way. “I wasn’t making fun of you, and I’m sorry if it seemed I was. I honestly would like to take you shopping, but I know you would be miserable. There is nothing funny about that, especially when it isn’t necessary to insist you go to town. Don’t be angry with me, honey. Not today. What happened between us is magical and I love you.”

“I don’t like being teased about something so embarrassing,” she whispered, unable to look at him.

Cray put his hand under her chin and raised her head so that he could see into her pretty green eyes. “Don’t be embarrassed, beautiful lady. I would give my life for you.”

She suddenly threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly. “I don’t want you to give your life for me. I’m sorry I am so sensitive.”

“It’s all right, honey.” He kissed her. “I will go to town alone and pick up more nails and return as quickly as possible. What will you do?”

“If you are positive that Otis Brown is safe, I will walk over there and apologize to him and discuss what plans he’s made for fixing up the place.”

“That would please me, Jordan. He is a good man.”

“I’ll take him some pie as a peace offering,” she decided, earning a proud smile from her husband. He soon left, after kissing her passionately and warning her that she might be too sore to make love for a day or two. “Oh my,” she whispered, disappointed.

“Oh, don’t be so sad, sweetheart. There are other ways we can please each other.” He left her wondering about that, chuckling at her indignation when he told her he’d rather show her than tell her.

Jordan put the rest of the pie into her basket and added some ham and freshly baked bread, and a jar of pickles that Clay bought at the store. They still had a jar left, and she didn’t think she would be in trouble for sharing with Otis. The basket wasn’t too heavy, and it was easy to carry the back way to her old home. She could hear hammering and followed it until she found the big man. Once again, she was shocked by his size, and she hoped that Cray was right about him being gentle.

“Missy, what you doin’ here?” Otis asked, and it was easy to see that he expected trouble from the look in his dark brown eyes.

“I came to say ‘sorry’, Otis. Cray didn’t tell me that he’d hired you, and when I saw you, I was scared because you’re so big. I’m sorry I was so rude. I brought you a peace offering,” she said with a smile, holding up the basket.

Otis returned the smile. “What you got in there, Missy? My hands is too dirty to look in there.”

“There’s a hunk of ham, some bread I baked yesterday. A jar of pickles, and some pie.”

“Now that all sounds real good, Missy. I hope Mister Cray wasn’t too hard on you?” he asked in genuine concern.

“We are newly married and still learning about each other.” Jordan looked up at him to explain. “We are fine now. He went on to town to get some nails. Are you and I all right now?” she asked.

“Yes, Missy. We is fine. Thank you for the basket of food.”

“I’ll put it in the kitchen so you don’t have to stop what you’re doing.”

“Thank you kindly, Miss.”

“What all are you doin’ out here?” she asked as he turned back to hammering.

“Mister Cray say he done want to raise colts here, so’s I been building up these pens.”

“That sounds good. Cray will be pleased.”

“He is doin’ this for you, Missy. He wants you to be makin’ some money off this here place.”

“He doesn’t need to worry about that, Otis. As far as I’m concerned, he can raise his colts here and I’ll feel like I am helping him in some way.” She was surprised when Otis smiled at her.

“Now I like them words, Miss. It didn’t seem right to me that your own man was goin’ to pay you for usin’ this place, but I learned that folks do all sorts of things I don’t understand.”

“Cray is a very nice man, but he owns this place as much as I do now, and I want him to share my place with me the way he is sharing his home with me. We are married now.”

“Not too long, though, I ‘spect?”

“No, not too long. I hope you’ll take supper with us soon, Otis. I’ll have Cray come and invite you some night.”

“Thank you kindly, Missy.”

She took the food to the house and left it on the table. She enjoyed getting to know Otis a bit better, and decided Cray was right about Otis being nice. She was on her way home when she was suddenly grabbed from behind and strong arms squeezed her so tightly that she couldn’t catch her breath.

*****

“Why are you so grumpy, Ally?” Jim Evans asked his pretty wife.

“I’m not grumpy!” she angrily denied.

“Yes, you are, and it’s time we had a good talk. You put the baby down for a nap and I’m going to take the boys next door and ask Mrs. Cooper to keep them for a while.” He didn’t wait to see what she had to say, but instead, he gathered his sons and headed out the door while Alice fumed.

She left the dishes on the table and took her daughter to the nursery and sat in her rocking chair to nurse the infant. “Men are so inconsiderate, Bethie.”

“That’s not true, Bethie. Men aren’t inconsiderate, but we sometimes need a hint so that we know what is making Mama angry and snappish.”

“Very cute!” Alice scolded.

Jim waited until Bethie was sound asleep, and then he took her and laid her in her cradle. He then took Alice’s arm and pulled her to her feet. She tried to resist, positive that she didn’t wish to talk to Jim, but he didn’t allow that.

Jim picked her up in his arms and carried her to their bedroom. “Are you willing to talk to me now, or do I need to do some convincing?”

“You’d better not!” she angrily dared him, which was a mistake. In the next moment, Alice found herself looking at the floor from the height of the bed where Jim sat to turn her over his knee. “No!” she cried out, but Jim gave her bottom a sound spank. “Stop it!”

“I don’t think so, Miss Alice. You’ve been in a snit for the last week, and I’m through with it. It’s not good for the boys to see you scowling and snapping at everyone. I’m not going to let this continue.” Jim tossed up her skirts and let them fall over her head, spanking her over her drawers next.

“You are being mean, Jim Evans!” Alice declared, bursting into tears.

“No, I’m not. I’m getting to the bottom of things the best way I know how.” Her drawers were next and he soon had her wriggling bottom bared for his hand. “Are you ready to talk to me yet?” he asked.

“No!” was her immediate answer. “I’m not going to tell you anything.”

“Fine. Now we’ll see about changing your mind.”

It didn’t take long for Alice to start regretting her sharp attitude. “Stop!”

“Too soon,” Jim replied, smacking her sit spots and making sure she felt each spank. He knew his Alice well. She was very tender on her sit spots and couldn’t bear being spanked there.

“No more! No more! Please, Jim! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

“I believe you’re sorry because you’re getting a spanking, not because you’ve been snapping my head off.”

“Please stop, Jim! I’m miserable now!”

“Are you ready to talk to me, Ally?”

“Yes!” she sobbed.

Jim flipped her over on the bed. “Tell me what’s wrong, honey. I can’t fix it if I don’t know what is going through your head. Please, let me hold you and make things right. Now talk to me.”

“You are ignoring me,” she sobbed. “I gained too much weight with Bethie and now you don’t want me.”

“You didn’t gain weight, honey, and I wouldn’t care if you did. I’m not ignoring you, either.”

“Yes you are. It’s been weeks since we’ve made love!”

“I didn’t know you were recovered enough, honey,” Jim said. And then he asked, “Did Doc say it was all right?”

“Yes, and I did tell you, but you had your nose in some papers and you were ignoring me.”

“Well, I’ll kick my own butt for that one! I’ve chopped enough wood to see us through winter easy!” he insisted. “I’ve gone swimming in cold water enough times I’m surprised I haven’t shriveled and fallen off!” He laughed when she giggled. “I apologize, my love, and unless you are too upset with me, may I correct the situation right now. Please?” he begged.

She nodded shyly, so Jim pulled her close and kissed her tenderly. He was gentle with her, but they weren’t newlyweds, and each knew what the other desired. It didn’t take long for them to come together in joy. Much later, Jim turned to her and said, “Honey, if I don’t hear you over something this important, please get my attention and let me know I’ve goofed. I wouldn’t hurt your feelings for anything, Ally. Please forgive me.”

“There is nothing to forgive, darling. I love you, and now I feel like your wife again.”

“Always, honey. Always.”

*****

“You let Missy go!” Jordan barely heard Otis’s words before she was tossed to the ground and there was the sound of men fighting with each other. She shook her head, trying to clear it, and that was when she saw two men fighting with Otis at the same time. She immediately realized it was the larger man who held her before. He was holding Otis while the other man struck him repeatedly.

Jordan got to her feet and saw her empty basket lying on the ground. She hurried to pick it up and reached inside, under the lining and took out her sharpest knife. She threw it at the bigger of the two men, and he screamed and fell to the ground, unable to move. Otis grabbed the man who’d been slapping him and calling him names, and lifted him off his feet and threw him against a large tree. His head thudded and then he fell unconscious.

“Missy, is you all right?” he asked Jordan.

“I’m fine. Oh, Otis, your poor face!”

“I’ve done had worse,” Otis said, closing his eyes for a moment as if to shut out a painful memory.

“Help me! I cain’t move!”

“You tried to kill me!” Jordan screamed at him.

“You was takin’ up with that one!”

“He works for my husband and me. What is wrong with you? Who are you?”

“We want that cabin. Heard tell it was abandoned.”

“You heard wrong. That is my place and it’s not abandoned, and even if it was, it doesn’t give you the right to move in.”

“Girl, you got to get help for me. You knifed me and I cain’t feel nothin’ at all! I cain’t move.”

“Missy, you go on home. This is man’s bizness.

“Cray should be on his way home. Meet him and send him for the doctor.”

“You go on to home and bar the doors and the windows, Missy. Hear now?”

“Yes, Otis.”

“No, don’t leave me here alone!” the big man begged and sobbed.

“She ain’t stayin’ here. I don’t trust you, and Mister Cray wouldn’t want her in danger. You’d best stay down iffen you don’t want Mister Cray to finish you off for tryin’ to hurt Missy.” He looked at Jordan. “Go on now and do whats I done tole you to.”

“No! Don’t leave me, girl. I’m white, and he’s a—”

“I’s the man who’s gonna finish you.”

Jordan ran on home, and for once in her life, she obeyed. She barred the doors and closed and barred the windows. Then she prayed that Cray would come soon. She wasn’t foolish; there were some who would automatically blame Otis and hang him before she could explain. It was a few minutes before someone banged on her door. “Missy, it be me, Otis.”

Jordan recognized his voice and instantly opened the door. He stumbled inside and said, “Bar the door, fast.” Jordan did so at once.

“You’re hurt,” she said calmly, going over and dipping some water from the stove’s reservoir into a basin. She got a cloth and approached him, trying to wipe away the blood so she could see where he was bleeding.