The Promise (24 page)

'You don't understand ... I need to be with her ... Pari ...'

Mili nodded, tears overflowing her eyes as she hugged Shambhavi tight. 'I understand ...'

'You don't ... she's my only family ...'

'We're here with you, Shambhavi ... please don't be like this ... Tutul said, also crying.

'Tutul ... Please let me go to my baby ... I want to see her ... She is ... dying ...' Shambhavi started sobbing. 'She's dying. Just like Dad. I want to die too. There is nothing left to live for...'

'Nothing is going to happen to her ... she will be okay...'

'You don't know that. You're just saying that to fool me. But you cannot fool me ... I am not a child. I have seen a lot more of the world, than you give me credit for. I know she is not going to be okay ... and I know I am never going to be okay...'

'Don't say that. Shambhavi, you have to be positive about this,' Mili tried to explain.

'I would have-had there been anything remotely positive about this whole situation ...' that was all Shambhavi said, before she broke down into tears again and her knees gave out. Mili and Tutul held her up and tried to guide her back to the ward, supporting her. But she was still not letting them.

'My baby ... Pari ...' Shambhavi kept repeating the same, begging her friends to not take her back to the ward. She looked helpless. By the way her teeth were clenched and she held herself up awkwardly, it was clear that she was in a lot of suffering. But she was not complaining about that. All she cared about was her baby. She joined her hands in plea and cried, 'Please let me go to her ... Please ... I know she does not have long to live ... I know she is going to ... leave me. I just want to see her, hold her close to me ... Please don't take this away from me...'

'Shambhavi, no. Pari is going to be okay ...' Tutul said, trying to be strong, but her tears kept flowing endlessly. Her body shook, as she sniffed, not looking at Shambhavi's face. It seemed like she was struggling to be strong outside, when she was breaking inside.

Mili could not even pretend to be so strong. She broke down and fell to her knees. She sobbed uncontrollably, her body heaving as her breathing got rattled. Tutul was by her side immediately, trying to pull her up, but Mili did not get up. She pulled her knees up to her face and wailed. 'This is ... so ... unfair...' she stammered to let the words out. She looked up at Shambhavi, her face crumpled up. She closed her eyes and said, 'This should never ... have happened ...'

Somehow, Miii s tears seemed to have given Shambhavi some strength. She tried to stoop down to pull her friend up, but the cast in her leg made it impossible for her to bend. 'Aargh,' she let out, as the pain hit her again. She doubled down in agony and clutched her stomach tightly.

'Are you okay?' Mili was back to her feet in a microsecond. 'Where does it hurt, Shambhavi?'

'Everywhere,' Shambhavi said and threw herself in Mili's arms. The three girls stood there, in the middle of the hospital corridor, crying profusely. Their wails were heart wrenching. They supported each other, wiped each other's tears, when their own kept flowing down their cheeks ceaselessly.

Arjun still stood rooted at his spot, and watched the scene unfold. Seeing Shambhavi break down like that was even more painful to see than the last time he had seen her crying. She was beyond herself, the anguish of their baby's health grappling her. She did not notice him standing there, just about six feet away from her. She did not care about anything other than Pari at the moment.

He should have been there. He knew he would never be able to forgive himself for causing Shambhavi such angst. He knew he was a horrible person. He knew it was all his fault, and he would have agreed to die a million deaths to spare Shambhavi the sorrow she felt right then. But it does not work like that.

You cannot undo what's already done.

He wished he could. He wished he had given Shambhavi a chance to explain-that he had not suspected her in the first place-that he had not been such a heartless monster. He wished he could take away all her woes and make them his. He wished their child-Pari, he had heard Shambhavi call her-would be all right. He wished Shambhavi would forgive him.

He wished ... but wishes rarely come true.

Making-up to someone might seem simple in theory, but it is really not that smooth a sail. Dues inexorably have to be paid.

ventually, the girls calmed down and Mili and Tutul took Shambhavi back to her ward. Arjun stayed where he was and waited for Shambhavi's friends to come out. He wanted to ask them what the doctors were saying about Shambhavi's and Paris condition and which doctor was working on their cases and every other possible detail about the treatment.

He could not just stand there and do nothing, watching the mother of his child push herself into depression. He needed to do something. To make something happen.

Finally, he saw Mili come out. He went to her.

'Go away,' she said and turned away from him.

'You must be Mili,' Arjun said. I have heard a lot about you.'

'You must be Arjun. I have heard a lot about you too. Mostly horrible things,' Mili glared at him.

He nodded, accepting the insult he deserved. 'How is she?'

'Did you not see? Were you not there?'

'Please Mili. You can ridicule me all you want. But first, please just tell me what I need to know.'

Something in his expression must have stirred something inside her, because she relented. 'Not well at all. Dr Awasthi, he is the one operating her, said she needs bed rest for at least two months. She lost a lot of blood. We had to infuse three bottles last night ...'

Arjun inhaled sharply.

'There are fractures in her right arm and her right leg is badly hurt. A concussion in her head. That, along with the blood loss and the weight she had gradually lost ... it doesn't seem good. She has no energy. Physically, she will need a while to recover ...'

'But she will be okay, right? There is no long-term damage ?'

Mili laughed sarcastically. The tears in her eyes started to flow again, as she clenched her teeth furiously and muttered, 'You think there is no long-term damage? Her father died right in front of her. Her baby is going to ... How do you expect her to come out of that unscarred?'

Arjun had nothing to say. He processed all the information he had just been given and his heart sank lower. Just then, Tutul came out of the ward too. She looked at him and the anger returned on her face.

'What are you doing here? Haven't you done enough damage?' she snarled.

He did not respond to that. He knew he deserved all the curses being hurled at him. He did not defend himself.

'How is the baby?' he asked instead. Even if there was no reason left to try, it was worth trying any and everything he could. For their child, he would leave no stone unturned.

'Dying,' Tutul said curtly.

Arjun flinched.

'It's the truth. Pari is dying. It is as simple as that. She was delivered after just six and a half months of gestation period. That too, after Shambhavi got hit by the edge of a wheelchair. I don't know if you have seen the child, but when you do, the bruise on her shoulder caused by that bump is unmistakable.'

'Stop it Tutul,' Mili said. 'Don't be so mean to him.'

'Why not? Why the hell not? He was the one who left Shambhavi after getting her pregnant. He was the one responsible for Shambhavi throwing herself into work to save for Pari. He was the reason why she had to do it all singlehandedly, that too when her father was already in the hospital and his expenses were already something she could barely manage. He is the one who did this to Shambhavi and Pari,' Tutul exploded. She turned to Arjun and sneered, 'Why did you come back now? There is nothing left to be saved.'

'I just want to be of any help I can. You have reasons to hate me, and that's okay. But now is not the time. Please tell me everything there is to know about anything I can do to help. Please,' Arjun begged.

'Money cannot buy everything, Mr Datta,' Mili said stiffly.

'I know that. But it surely can pay for medical expenses.'

'Shambhavi would never accept any help from you.'

'Shambhavi does not need to know. I just want to do my best to ensure that she and Pari get the best medical attention possible. And money can make that happen. I do not know how much you know about me, Tutul. But this was the reason why I became obsessed with earning money-because I did not have any to pay for medical care for my family and they died because of that. It would be nice if you cooperate with me, and even if you don't -I am not going to let money come in the way of my family's life again.'

He stood outside the glass door, watching silently. There was no one around, except a nurse, who looked bored, sitting there, doing nothing other than staring at the frail, sick baby. Arjun had requested personal attention for the baby, but since they needed to do it without raising Shambhavi's suspicion, they could not get Pari transferred to another hospital. It was all right, though; the hospital they were in was one of the best in the city, and the baby was not strong enough to be transferred to a bigger city.

They were doing their best for her. Seven paediatricians, from five different hospitals of the city were working on Paris case. Two specialists had flown in from Delhi to help. They had decided to operate on the baby. Pari was not strong enough to withstand an operation. But she was only getting weaker by the second. The panel of doctors decided against waiting. The operation was to be conducted in ten minutes' time and the doctors had left Pari under the supervision of the nurse, to prepare for the operation.

But Arjun was not thinking about any of that. All he had in mind was-Pari. He stared at her, unblinkingly. She was his daughter, his blood. She was the one thing he shared with Shambhavi, even though she would never let him close to her. Pari was their daughter, even though Shambhavi would not give him the right to be her father.

She was very tiny, with tiny fingers and toes. Her eyes were closed and he craved to find out what colour they were. Her lips were a bright shade of pink, as was her entire body. Her legs were folded and almost touched her chest. Her hands were also doubled up in a way that made her look like a ball. All her limbs crumpled close to her body, she looked like she must have looked inside her mother's womb. She was not used to having so much space around her, so she had not spread her arms and legs; she just stayed the way she had since the time she got life inside her mother.