Ever since that day, he had been with Shambhavi every second. He had never left her side. He knew she did not want him there. But she did not say anything. And that was the problem-she was not saying anything ... anything at all, to anyone. Not her friends, not anyone at the hospital, and especially not him. She was not even looking at anything. Her eyes were always open, blinking very rarely. Her gaze saw through everything. Her eyes did not rest on anything.
And nothing was making it better. The hospital was concentrating on her physical wellbeing. For the emotional, they had referred her to a psychiatrist. The shrink could not get Shambhavi to even listen, let alone speak. The hospital was doing everything in its power; she was being given all kinds of medication. But nothing was working on her. She stayed in her cocoon. She did not want to come out.
Arjun was scared. He could not see Shambhavi like this. If she wanted him out of her life, fair and good; he would go gladly. But he wanted her to at least say that to him. To shout, to be furious, to insult him-anything. But he could not ... would not ... go unless she asked him to. He knew she needed him. Maybe even she did not know that, but he did. She was not going to get better staying in the hospital. He could not wait for her treatment to finally start showing results.
He was desperate. He wanted to do something. He feared that if she was left in such a state for long, it would eventually become her constant state. He could not let that happen. He had to do something.
'How is she?' Arjun asked. He was at Miii s office, an uninvited guest. But he had no other option. No one was taking his calls. No one was calling him back. And he could not live with that. He had to know.
'Still the same. Why did you come here? I told you not to,' Mili said softly, motioning him to sit. He was drawing unwanted attention; her co-workers were staring from their cubicles.
'Because you weren't answering my calls.'
'Because I had nothing to tell. If there is a change in her condition, I will tell you. Right now, there isn't any.'
'For how long are we going to wait? Her condition won't change itself. I have been at the hospital all these days too, watching from a distance, because Tutul doesn't let me into the ward. I know that she is not going to get better like this. We will have to do something, for that to happen,' Arjun said.
'What can we do? She knows we are there with her. She is taking all her medications on time. There is nothing else that can be done.'
'We need to take her out of the hospital. That is where all the depression is coming from. She is constantly in contact with patients and doctors and nurses. There is sadness all around. She feels like a patient. She will never get normal again if she does not get out of there.'
'You have a point, but she is not strong enough to live alone. Accept it or not, she is a patient. She needs supervision,' Mili said, sadly.
'I will be there with her. I won't leave her side for even a second. I will make sure she is okay.'
'Are you kidding? She will never agree to that.'
'We don't need her permission. We just need Tutul on our team,' he said.
'Tutul hates you, Arjun. You know that.'
'And that's where you come in. It is your job to convince her. Convince her to let us do this, not for me, but for Shambhavi. She won't say no to that.'
'I can try. But, I don't know ... Mili seemed to think it over in her head. She reached a conclusion and said. 'Okay. Consider it done. What do we do?'
'I have a plan.'
He was happy with the progress already. When they had told Shambhavi that they were getting her discharged from the hospital and bringing her back home, she had not blinked an eyelid. It was almost as if she had not even heard them. But when she was asked to sign the documents and she found out that Arjun was paying for all the expenses, a spark of fire had returned into her eyes.
'I would happily sell myself before I accept that man's money,' she had said furiously.
She was angry, but it was an emotion. For Arjun, it was progress.
As Tutul helped Shambhavi walk and they got into her house, Arjun felt a stipple of hope. They brought her inside her bedroom and made her sit on her bed. Arjun had been there before, with Mili, to stash away anything that could remind her of Pari. The toys Shambhavi had already started to buy were carefully concealed, away from sight.
Shambhavi sat down on her bed and did nothing. She did not even change her posture or make herself comfortable. There was no recognition in her eyes. Arjun doubted she even knew that she was back home. Her eyes were blank.
Tutul motioned Arjun to come out; she wanted to talk to him in private. He wasn't sure it was a good sign.
'What now?' she hissed, as soon as they were in the dining room, out of Shambhavi's hearing range.
'As planned. The room will be ready in three days, right?' Arjun asked.
'Yes. Three days, if everything goes right. What do we do till then?'
'Just wait, I guess.'
'What kind of a stupid plan is this? Even if I believe that your plan will work and she will snap out of her trance as soon as she enters the room, what are we going to do till the room is ready? We need to get a nurse to take care of her. She cannot be alone. And I really, really want to be with her, but I have just gotten my job back after so much begging...I cannot be unemployed again... Tutul panicked. She had given up her job to work on the interiors of his hotel-The Green Meadowbut since the hotel never actually opened up, the project did not do the wonders to her career that she had been hoping for. Arjun knew she held that against him too. But not for long. Now that he was back, he was planning to do something about inaugurating the hotel soon.
'Relax. You do not have to be here all the time. Your visits would be enough,' Arjun said.
'But then who will stay here fulltime? I know Mili does not have that kind of time either ... Maybe she would be able to do it, but her office ...'
'Mili does not have to be here either. I will stay with Shambhavi.'
'What? You? Do you think you can trap me into this? I'll never leave you alone with Shambhavi,' Tutul snarled.
'What do you think I would do? Take advantage of her? In this condition? I know you hate me Tutul, but even you know that I care about her. I would never cause her any harm ... again.'
'But she will not let you live with her. Don't you get it? She hates you.'
'And that is a good thing. It would be some emotion ... any emotion. That is the best way to push her out of her condition. She will protest. If not right away, maybe tomorrow, when she sees me here still. Or the day after that ... She will do something to push me away ... but at least she won't be a statue anymore,' Arjun said.
After a minute of thought, in which Tutul looked up at him suspiciously and mentally evaluated the situation, she nodded.
'I hope this works,' she murmured, more to herself than him.
'I hope so too.'
'And Arjun, you have to promise me you won't hurt her. I know you won't ... but I still cannot trust you ... after everything.'
'I promise. I will never hurt her,' Arjun swore.
They went back to Shambhavi's bedroom to find her sitting in the exact same place, in the exact same way. There wasn't any change at all. It scared Arjun. He could feel her going away, retreating into some far corner of her head, where she wanted no one to enter. He needed to get her out of it quickly, or he would lose her forever.
He gestured to Tutul and she nodded. She went to Shambhavi casually and said, 'Better now? I bet it feels awesome to be back home.'
There was no response. They hadn't expected any.
'You know what? Mili and Vikaas are getting engaged. They have told their parents about their relationship and surprisingly, no one created a scene or anything. They agreed -both families. Imagine that,' Tutul blabbered.
No response from Shambhavi.
'Oh gosh. Look at the time. It's 9 PM already. I really need to go home. I'm twenty-two, but my parents still treat me like a child.'
No response.
'So ... umm ... I'll go then? If there is anything you need, just give me a call, okay?'
No response.
'And oh-Arjun will be here. He'll take care of you. We couldn't get a nurse, so he agreed to stay with you till you are okay.'
Shambhavi blinked. Arjun and Tutul met each other's eyes. They were ecstatic inside. They could not believe their plan was working already.
'That's okay, right?' Tutul prodded.
Shambhavi's gaze zeroed in on Tutul for a brief second, shifted to Arjun for even shorter and that was it. Her eyes were blank again.
'Is there a problem?' Tutul tried again.
No response.
'You're okay with Arjun staying here with you? You don't mind?'
No response.
Tutul looked at Arjun again, disheartened. Arjun nodded to let her know that it was going to be okay. They needed patience. Shambhavi would come back.
Tutul nodded back. She kissed Shambhavi on her cheek and excused herself.
Arjun and Shambhavi were left alone in the house.
All his hopes went down the drain over the next few days, as he saw Shambhavi retreat even further away from the world. He tried everything. He tried to evoke emotions in her, of any kind. He tried to make her angry, by telling her what to do. She did not respond. She just got up and went to the washroom when he told her it was time for a shower. Fifteen minutes later, she came out, bathed.
She did not object to anything he did. She opened her mouth to take the medicines whenever he asked her to. She sipped the fruit juice when he put a glass against her lips. She brushed her hair mechanically when he handed her a comb. She let him wipe her face after meals. She let him cook for her. She woke up when he asked her to. She went to sleep when he turned off the lights.
She did not show any kind of emotion, no matter how hard he tried to infuriate her.
Love did not seem to work either. He talked to her about how he knew it must be so difficult for her. How he regretted everything. How he would always be with her whenever she needed him. He even held her tight sometimes, hoping she would hug him back. Or at least try to pull away. She did nothing. She just stayed like a statue. Seeing nothing, hearing nothing, saying nothing.
Arjun would have given up, had he not had so much confidence in his plan. There was a slight unavoidable setback, due to unforeseen reasons, but he knew that once it was complete, he would get Shambhavi out of her personal, mental darkness. But he was getting impatient. The five days he had been trying to evoke some kind of a response from her seemed like five decades.
It was painful to see her like that. And to feel that she might never come out of it ...
But he had not lost hope. Not yet.