Authors: Kate Benson
“Are you serious right now?” I ask
. She nods up at me while fiddling with a lock of her hair. “You do understand that I’m with Sophie, right?”
“Yeah, I know you and Sophie are having your fun
…” she answers, looking back up at me through her fluttering eyelashes. My stomach turns when she tries to touch my chest again. I immediately pull away from her some more. “Aww, Baby, it’s okay. I won’t bite unless you ask me to,” she winks. “I just wanted to let you know you have options when you two are done playing around.”
Is this chick for real?
“I’m going to give you one last chance to stop,” I say, waiting for her eyes to meet with mine. “I want this to be clear so there won’t be any more confusion okay?” she smirks slightly but I can tell she’s listening. “I’m with Sophie. If you stop this now then I’ll pretend this never happened. This is your last chance to walk away without embarrassing yourself any further.”
“Okay, I understand. I just
…”
“Stop,” I sa
y, holding a hand up in front of me as though this gesture will be enough for her to just leave things and back off of me. “I’m not ‘playing’ with Sophie. We are
together
. I have no plans to be away from her and I’m not interested in whatever you’re about to say,” I say firmly as I take a step away from her. “I know that y’all are going through a very emotional time right now and out of respect for that matter and my
very
serious feelings for Sophie, I don’t want to put any more shit on her. I won’t say anything to her this time but this can’t happen again.”
“But you didn’t even listen to
—” she begins, I close my eyes at her persistence.
“I’m not going to listen to you because whatever you’re about to say doesn’t matter to me. I
’m not interested, is that clear enough for you?” I ask. She continues to stare up at me, with a stunned expression taking over the confusion that was present over her features just a few moments ago. I see Sophie walking towards us. I pull her to my side as soon as she’s within my reach by her waist, settling my hand on the side of her stomach as I smile at her. “Are you ready?” I ask.
“Yeah,” she
answers while looking to Lucy. “We’ll be back in a few minutes, Luce. I just need to run into town.”
Lucy is still standing with the same stunned look o
ver her face. Apparently the word no seems to be a new one for her. She nods as I walk Sophie over to her side of the truck.
Once she’s settled
inside, I make my way back over to the driver’s side, without sparing a glance towards Lucy. I hope that what happened just now is just her emotions because of what today is and not the type of person she really is. Either way, I’ve made my decision to stay away from her as much as possible from here on out.
Sophie
hasn’t any place specific she wants to go to, so we end up driving around until she directs me towards a lake. Cutting off the ignition in a space that looks out over the water, I glance over to her. She’s sitting next to me but isn’t curled up as close to me as she usually is.
We sit quietly for a while a
s I keep my arm wrapped around her, gently rubbing my hand up and down her arm. She has her knees pulled to her chest and appears to be deep in thought, her head resting back against my arm. Her voice breaks the silence eventually as she turns her head slightly to face me.
“Does it bother you to be here?” I hold her eyes and shake my head at
her question.
“No,
not at all … Does it bother you for me to still be here?”
“No
… Yes … I mean, it’s such a weird situation for us to be in I think, but I’m grateful that you’re so willing to be here for me right now. I think it would scare most other people away, ya know?”
“Well I don’t scare eas
ily, Sophie,” I wink and give her a small smile which she returns. “I wish you didn’t have to go through any of this, but seeing as though you do, I’m happy I can be here for you.” I pull her over to me gently and place a lingering kiss on her forehead.
“Thanks,” she whispers, settling her head on my shoulder before falling quiet again. The radio is on but it’s otherwise silent in the cab of the truck.
I begin to hum along softly to the ‘Journey’ song that’s playing out low as Sophie leans up closer to me, kissing me on the jaw only once before settling back against my shoulder.
We sit like th
is for well over an hour before she asks for the time and I hear her letting out a deep sigh when I tell her. “We should probably head back so we can get ready,” she says quietly in reply. Reaching up, I turn the key, starting the truck before taking us both back to the house.
***
Ana
If there was any way
that I could get out of experiencing this day, then I’d do it.
I stare at my reflection in the bathroom mirror
, wiping the tears away from under my tired eyes for the fourth time as I bring the mascara wand back up my face.
T
he tears soon begin to pool again and I find myself throwing the tube back into my makeup bag and finally giving up from my frustration. Somehow over my stomping and stifled cries, I manage to hear a quiet knocking sound from the other side of the closed door.
“I’ll be out in
just a second, Luce!” I call, but the door is already beginning to slowly open. “Lucy …” I begin to speak, my voice trailing off though when I glance up and see a pair of steel blue eyes I’ve come to love watching me.
“It’s me
, Baby,” Drake says softly, letting himself in before closing the door behind him.
“Sorry I thought you were Lucy. She’s been hounding me
ever since I came in here,” I explain as he walks closer to me before placing his hands on either side of my face.
“It’s okay. If you need to be alone right now
then I can leave. I just wanted to check on you and see how you’re doing.”
“Drake
, I don’t want to do this,” I say weakly as I close my eyes. He pulls me to his chest and wraps his strong arms around my exhausted frame.
“I know
, Baby., he presses his lips to the top of my head, affectionately stroking my back as he attempts to soothe me, although the gesture only makes me break down even more. “Shh, Baby. Come here, it’s okay,” he whispers, moving us over to the edge of the bathtub and sitting down while cradling me in his lap.
I begin to shake my head in disagreement
, but because I’m sobbing so hard I can’t even manage to say the words out loud. Funnily enough though, it turns out that I don’t have to. “I know it doesn’t feel like everything will be okay, but it will. I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you, my Love. I know you feel so alone right now without him but you’re anything but alone Analise.” He looks into my eyes and gently wipes the new tears away, before pressing his lips to my forehead. “You’re never alone, Baby. I know I can’t take away your pain but I’ll do whatever I can to help you endure it.”
“I love you
, Drake,” I tell him as I press my lips gently against his neck.
“
And I love you, Baby,” he says, his hands now tenderly rubbing my thigh. “Do you want to take some time out and get some fresh air?” I nod my answer before he stands up, still cradling me in his arms. “Do you want me to carry you?”
“No
, I can walk,” I answer weakly. He gently places me back onto my feet and I look at him, placing my hand onto his cheek as I pull him down to meet my lips. “Thank you.”
“Always
, Baby,” he says after giving me a soft peck on the lips. He takes a hold of my hand in his and leads me through the house, quickly telling Chase that we’ll be back in around ten minutes.
We don’t have
a lot of time so I head towards the swing in the front yard. After settling himself on the seat, Drake pulls me back into his lap and continues to hold me again. We don’t say anything else, but then we don’t really need to. Everything that had needed to be said already has been and I think that he senses that I just need to be with him. Our relationship isn’t perfect, no relationship ever is, but I know with everything in my heart that we’re perfect for each other.
A gentle breeze makes its way through the trees and when it hits me, I
feel the chill. Drake must feel it too because he immediately readjusts so I can slip my arms under the fabric of his jacket. He wraps the sides around me so I can nuzzle snugly into his warm embrace. I breathe in his scent before releasing a cleansing breath.
“Do you want me to take you somewhere?”
“We don’t have time,” I answer him. I really wish we did but it’s almost time to head back inside.
“Analise if you really don’t want to do this you don’t have to. I’m sure Sophie or Lucy would
be willing to speak in your place,” he offers.
“No.” I
answer immediately. “I don’t want to do this but I owe it to both Jack and Sophie. He was such a great brother, Drake. It didn’t matter what was going on in our lives or how bad things got, he always took care of me and made sure that I was okay. He was so charismatic that anyone who ever met him loved him almost immediately. I suppose that’s why I was so mean to Sophie on the day I met her. It wasn’t because I didn’t like her, it was because I could see how much he wanted her and it scared me,” I explain to him, but Drake doesn’t say anything. He keeps his face close to my neck as he listens. “I saw how people reacted to him throughout his whole life and always knew that once he’d picked the girl he wanted, she’d already love him. I thought she’d take him away from me and I’d be alone. I never imagined for a single moment that things would have turned out like this. I never thought that the girl who was to steal his heart would be the same one to help me put mine back together. That’s what she did though and it’s all thanks to Jack.” I raise my eyes to meet with his and kiss him on his chin softly. “Sophie would absolutely make that speech for me but I could never ask her to. People always assume that I saved her, but she saved me, too. I can’t leave her now.”
I catch Drake’s gaze and see moisture
building in his eyes. He gently places his hand on my cheek and holds me there. “I don’t know what I‘ve done to deserve to be with someone with such a beautiful soul, Analise, but I swear I’m never letting you go, Baby,” he bends his head slightly and kisses me. As his lips meet with mine, I hear him letting out a small and low humming sound. Parting my lips to grant his tongue entry, it feels amazing as it sweeps against mine. I can feel each and every emotion coursing through him from this kiss. Keeping me cradled in his arms, he moves his free arm to the nape of my neck while deepening the kiss, causing me to melt into him. Releasing another soft hum, he pulls away from me slowly before placing another gentle kiss on each of my eyes. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” I
say, resting my hand back against his chest. “I suppose we’d better head inside.”
With a slight nod
of agreement, he stands up and places me back onto my feet before taking my hand in his and leading us back towards the house.
***
Once I finish pinning my hair back, I take what is most probably my fifth glance in the mirror so I can assess the final product I’ve spent the past forty five minutes on.
Today’s gathering
is supposed to be a casual one, so I decided to wear a white sun dress that has tiny yellow flowers spread over the material. I’ve had it for a couple of years now and I remember that Jack had always loved me wearing it.
It’s fitted
at the top but begins to flow just below the waistline, skimming down to just past my knees.
Over it, I’
ve decided to wear my pale yellow cardigan, which pairs nicely with the dress. I’ve kept my makeup natural, only using a little bronzer and waterproof mascara with some sheer gloss. My hair is curled at the ends, with the top half pinned away from my face.
Deciding that I look good
enough to make Jack proud, I walk through to the living room so I can find Ana.
Chase is sitting on the couch
as I emerge from the bathroom and without saying anything, he walks over to me. Lightly brushing my hair behind my shoulder and after a brief touch to my face, he releases me unwillingly. I fully understand why he’s being less affectionate than normal and I appreciate it, but it’s also really awkward for us to be like this with one another.
“You look beautiful,” he whispers a
s he pulls away so he can look over me. I notice his eyes landing on the necklace I’m wearing, the one with Jack’s dog tags on and after a brief pause, he traces his fingers over the tiny chain.
My breath hitches when he
touches it before our eyes meet. “Just straightening it out for you,” he reassures me quietly. The reaction from his touch makes me feel slightly guilty.
I fe
el him sliding the hook back in place to the base of my neck, before he tenderly rests the tags back in the center of my chest, moving his hands to my shoulders before he begins softly massaging them. “How are you holding up?”
I release a
deep breath and look at him as I begin to shake my head nervously, “I don’t know … To be honest, I’m really starting to worry about Ana. She seems to be taking all of this way too easily but I know that it’s her coping mechanism, she’s going to snap soon. I really want to talk to her before we leave but I don’t know where she is. I thought she was in here.”
“
She and Drake left about ten minutes ago, just before you came back out,” he answers me, “they said they’ll be back before it’s time to leave.”
“Well, it’s nearly time to go now. I wonder where they went
…” I say at the same time as I hear the front door opening up.
“You wonder where who went?” Ana asks
. I turn to face her and Drake. Her eyes are a little puffy, but otherwise, you’d never have known that she was upset.
“You,” I say
as I walk over to her side. “Can I talk to you for a second before we go?” I ask and she follows me through into Jack’s old room, which now belongs to JT.
It looks so different in here
although I’m happy that JT has been the one to move in after we left. I know that nobody would love this room more than him. I push the door closed behind us before walking over to the little bed where Ana is sitting. I take a seat on the Buzz Lightyear toy box nearby and face her, “How are you doing, Ana?”
She shakes her head as her eyes fill with tears
, placing her hands over her face as she begins to cry for what is most definitely not the first time today.
“I’m okay,” she manages a
s I move over to sit beside her on the edge of the bed, wrapping my arms firmly around her. “This is so dumb, Soph! Tears aren’t going to help anything. I just really have to get my shit together!” she exclaims as she starts to cry even harder. Seeing her like this brings tears to my own eyes. “This isn’t the way it was supposed to be, Sophie. He was supposed to come home, live his life and everything was supposed to be fine! But, he’s gone and I’m … I feel so alone!”
“Ana, you’re not alone. Never
, do you hear me? I know I’m not Jack but I love you so much. You’re like my sister too,” I whimper, pulling her tighter by my side.
“Love you too
, Soph,” she answers and we sit here crying together for a few more minutes before Ana pulls away while wiping the tears away from beneath her eyes. “Ugh! This sucks!”
“I know,” I groan a
s I wipe my face clean of my own tears. Ana stands and offers her hand out to me. She gives me another hug and smiles weakly at me.
“Thanks for checking on me,” she says
, her voice sounding a little stronger now.
“Thanks for taking care of me too,” I whisper
, cleaning the makeup smudges from underneath her eyes. “I’m so glad you like me now.” I say lightly, which makes us both chuckle over remembering our first ever meeting.
“
I think we could both use a shot before we leave,” Ana says as I follow her through to the kitchen, passing Chase and Drake who are still inside the living room and watching us as we walk by. She reaches into the cupboard and pours us each a shot of whiskey. Raising our glasses for a toast, she whispers with a teary smile, “To Jackie.”
“To Jack,” I whisper
. After we clink, I grab her hand as we throw back our glasses before placing them empty back on top of the counter.
“Ready?”
I ask, willing for her to answer with a yes, but she shakes her head at me.
“Nope,” she admits, while grabbing her purse off of the counter. “Let’s go.”
***
The turnout for the ceremony in town is nothing short of amazing. I know that Jack and Ana grew up here in Camden, but I’m still shocked to see such a huge crowd in such a small town.
Once
the mayor has made his speech, about what an upstanding man Jack was and talking about the sacrifice he had made for our country, he asks Ana to go up and accept the memorial plaque on behalf of the family.
I watch her mak
ing her way up to the front, looking uncharacteristically nervous in her turquoise dress as she steps in front of the podium while the local paper snaps her picture. After a brief round of applause, she looks out over the crowd and begins to speak quietly as her eyes reach mine.
“
Over this past year I’ve been really touched by the outpour of support and love I’ve received from Jack’s hometown. My brother was a whole lot of things to a whole lot of people here in Camden. He was a gifted musician, an awesome quarterback, and a beloved Godfather. He was a treasured friend, a loving and devoted fiancé, and a real life American hero. To me though, he was just Jack, a loyal brother and the other half of my family. Jack was hands down the best guy I’ve ever known. He always had a smile on his face, and was always there to lend a hand. He was honest, funny, and every day with him was an adventure. He loved this town and so many of the people here that he would be so honored that so many of you came out today to both support us, and to remember him. I think I speak for everyone here when I say that he is and will always be sorely missed and that we are so proud and grateful to have had him in our lives, even if only for a little while. Thanks again so much for your love, your support, and for this great honor to Jack’s name.” Ana gives a teary smile as she makes her way back down to where we’re all standing.
She makes a beeline straight for Drake and
I watch as his arms engulf her. I’m so glad she’s found him. Once we’ve spoken with a few people who made their way over to us, we decide that it’s time to head back over to the house.
The ride back with Chase is a quiet one. I don’t say anything
and just rest my head on the seat while taking a few deep breaths and blowing them out towards the ceiling of the truck. As we pull up to the house, he cuts the ignition as he looks over at me.
“Are you okay?”
I nod slowly as I meet his gaze, “Yeah, I think so. I’m nervous but otherwise I guess I’m alright.” I grab his hand and squeeze it gently because I need to have some contact. “Thanks for coming with us for the dedication. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to tell you how much it means to me that you’re here right now, Chase.”
“Of course,” he says
, gingerly placing a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Where else would I be?”
“I feel like
it’s only right that I warn you what I’ve decided to sing later on,” I begin but he immediately shakes his head in disagreement.
“It’s okay
, Sophie,” he tells me while holding my gaze. “Don’t worry about me because I’ll be fine. Just let me know what I can do to help you through the day and I’ll do it, okay?” I lean my head on his shoulder and squeeze his arm as I thank him again.
We slide out of the truck and make our way into the house
so we can finish helping get the food set out. I notice Lucy is acting a little strange towards Chase but decide not to mention it to her. I figure it’s just weird for her to see me with someone else, especially on a day like today. Is it weird that I’ve asked him to stay? Maybe … but I’m glad that I did.
***