The Rain-Soaked Bride (8 page)

‘You certainly were, darling,’ Shining assured her. ‘It was a revelation.’

‘I’m wasted,’ she said.

‘On what?’ Toby muttered.

‘Oh,’ said Cassandra, suddenly stopping and pointing at him with her little plastic spoon, ‘I don’t even know you.’

‘This is my colleague, Terry,’ said Shining. ‘He started working with me about eight months ago.’

‘I see,’ said Cassandra, screwing up her eyes as if this would help her see right into Toby’s soul.

He tried to see beyond the frizzy hair and glasses, the layers of curiously mismatched clothes and the ice cream. He guessed she was in her late teens, early twenties. She seemed to be the sort of person who had yet to settle on the personality she was after so was going to try on all of them to see what might stick.

‘I like him,’ she said. ‘He’s nice. Terry’s a stupid name, though. What’s his real one?’

‘Don’t start,’ Shining told her. ‘You know how this works.’

‘Oh yes!’ Cassandra laughed, spinning around the square like a ballet dancer. ‘Spies and their silly games.’ She swooped in on Toby, put her arm in his and kissed him on the cheek. ‘Doesn’t matter,’ she said. ‘My name’s not Cassandra either.’ She looked at him. ‘You’ll probably fall in love with me in a minute, just give in to it, you’re only human.’

She turned to Shining. ‘Are we going for a drink then?’

d) The Moon and Sixpence, Wardour Street, Soho

They settled down in the Moon and Sixpence, Cassandra attacking a large Diet Coke with gusto. ‘I don’t like alcohol,’ she said to Toby, ‘it makes me all squiffy. So what are you working on at the moment, then?’

‘It’s a weird one,’ said Shining. ‘You’ll like it.’ He gave her a vague rundown of the details, avoiding names but listing the pertinent facts in the deaths of Sir James, Leonard Holley and Sonia Finnegan. ‘It seems to me,’ he concluded, ‘to bear all the hallmarks of a curse.’

‘Could be,’ Cassandra admitted, surprising herself with a burp after drinking her Coke too quickly. She laughed and then suddenly looked deadly serious again. She looked at Toby. ‘How much do you know about curses?’

‘Not much.’

‘Didn’t think so, you looked too vanilla for that sort of thing. The principle behind a curse, or hex, or execration is simple enough: you wish someone ill and so you put that illness on them. In practical terms, it’s obviously not that simple. Human beings can’t go around wishing the world into the shape they want. Otherwise,’ she scowled, ‘I’d already be at the RSC.

‘Theoretically, it is possible to alter the physical through conjuration but the effects are usually limited and the skill needed to achieve such a thing are beyond most of us. Beating physics up with words is like trying to knock a brick over by blowing on it. For curses to work they have to tap into something else.

‘For example, you can’t blow a building up by talking at it and yet an army captain can speak a few commands into his walkie-talkie, order up a missile and achieve the same thing.’

‘But the missile is doing all the hard work,’ said Toby.

Cassandra smiled. ‘Is it? The command, the desire, is coming from the army captain. If he hadn’t ordered it then the building would still be standing. The missile is just a tool, a means to an end. In magical terms (and philosophical ones for that matter), the power lies in the command not the method of execution.

‘Another important distinction: a curse is not a prayer. When casting a curse, it’s all about retention of dominance, you’re asking something to intercede, to act out your wishes, but you don’t want to concede power to it.

‘That said, to fall back on my terribly clever example, the missile can develop a mind of its own if the army captain isn’t careful. It’s a dangerous and complex business.’ She turned back to Shining. ‘From what you’ve told me, this could be a curse, yes. Or a more basic summoning.’

‘A summoning?’ asked Toby.

‘For that you’d need to talk to a demonologist,’ Cassandra said, grabbing at a menu. ‘Are we eating? I’m famished.’

‘I’m sure we can order something,’ Shining replied.

‘Just some nachos. Or garlic bread. Or maybe burgers. They do nice burgers. Or scampi. I like scampi. Funny little things, scampi. Have you ever seen one in the wild? I haven’t. I wonder if you can keep them as pets.’

‘What’s the difference between a summoning and a curse?’ asked Toby, trying to get things back on track.

‘Oh, well, they’re easy. A summoning is just calling on something. Invoking a force that then acts according to its own natural behaviour. It’s all about control again. In a summoning, the person calling on that force has no real control over what that force does, they just know that it will act in a certain fashion dependent on its usual habits. For example, if you unleash a lion in a field of sheep you can be fairly sure it’s going to end up with a belly full of lamb. If you put a lion in a fish tank you’re just going to end up with a lot of splashing and an angry lion. It’s all about knowing what you’re summoning. In fact,’ she smiled, ‘it’s all about choosing correctly from your menu.’ She handed the menu to Shining. ‘A double burger with bacon and brie with extra onion rings, southern-fried chips and plenty of barbecue sauce.’

She turned back to Toby. ‘But summonings are sloppy. And dangerous. To be avoided if possible. A curse retains the control. The person doing the cursing calls the shots.’

‘So how can we tell which this is?’

‘By asking an expert like me,’ she said, before throwing her hand to her forehead. ‘If only I could think clearly. I’m so terribly hungry. I think I may faint.’

‘I’ll order,’ said Shining, smiling. He looked at Toby. ‘Want anything?’

‘Of course he does,’ said Cassandra. ‘I’m not eating on my own. He’ll have a burger as well.’

‘Will he?’ asked Toby.

‘Of course you will,’ she replied. ‘Who doesn’t like burgers? Or scampi … or maybe a pie …’ She slowly reached for the menu again but Shining snatched it away.

‘I’ll order three burgers,’ he said, retreating to the bar.

Suddenly Cassandra grabbed Toby’s thigh. ‘You in love with me yet?’

‘Not quite yet,’ he admitted, backing away.

‘You’re only lying to yourself,’ she said, letting go of his leg. ‘It’s sad, really.’ She grinned and stared at him. ‘To live under such denial.’

‘No doubt I’ll succumb any moment,’ he said.

She inclined her head, thought for a moment, then shook it. ‘No. You love someone else. Oh Lord …’ She fell back in her chair. ‘I’m always the bridesmaid. Poor girl. It was a tragedy, that foolish little thing she called life.’

Rather than get involved in a discussion as to whether he loved anyone else, Toby decided to keep the talk on subject. ‘So how did you become an expert on curses?’

‘At school,’ she said. ‘Everybody hates me because I’m weird.’ She said it without expecting sympathy, to her it was a simple expression of fact and Toby suddenly felt sad for her. ‘I’m used to it now and, you know, to hell with them, but when I was at school it used to really hurt. I just wanted people to be nice. And when I gave up on that I just wanted them to feel as badly as I did. I’m not much cop in a fight so I looked into alternatives. I found one!’ She grinned. ‘You haven’t known real pleasure until you’ve seen an entire netball team sprout facial hair.’ She gazed into the distance, a dreamy look on her face. ‘I think Clarissa Hedges still needs to shave twice a week.’

Shining returned from ordering the food. ‘Done,’ he informed them. He looked to Cassandra. ‘So, what do you think?’

She sighed. ‘For it to be a curse there are certain obvious signs. Firstly a delivery method. Curses aren’t just spoken, you need to mark the victim out, plant a target on them. Usually this is by a written form of the incantation.’

‘The mobile phones?’ Toby suggested.

‘It would seem likely,’ Shining agreed.

Cassandra shrugged. ‘If someone has found a way of digitising hexes then they’re a better magician than I am. Curses don’t like being written down, they’re too powerful. It takes a strict methodology and control to even set pen to paper.’

‘The phones were destroyed.’

‘True,’ she nodded. ‘It does seem the most likely. It just worries me.’

‘The whole thing is worrying,’ said Toby.

‘Yes,’ she agreed, ‘but brilliant experts like me don’t like things to contradict their view of their subject. Digitised curses? That’s just freaky. I’ll be panicking about email attachments for months.’

‘So what are the other obvious signs?’ Toby asked.

‘Method of death. In a summoning you never know what you’re going to get. Demons are a weird bunch and terribly creative. I once heard of a man eaten by toads. I mean, that’s just sick … imagine!’ She began miming a toad eating people. It was like a sequel to her earlier performance, Toby thought, and just as disconcerting.

‘It must have taken ages too,’ she said, finishing her mime abruptly. ‘In a curse,’ she continued, ‘despite the fact that a third presence is becoming involved – the power that enacts the curse – the cause of death is usually something natural. There are exceptions but a hex spirit doesn’t usually kill directly, it encourages an external state where death becomes likely. It makes the world around the cursed person excessively hostile.’

‘That fits. All three deaths could appear accidental.’

‘Perhaps it’s simplest to look on the forces that fulfil the curse as agents of death,’ Cassandra continued. ‘Once invoked, they follow the victim around, affecting their environment wherever they go. They don’t do the killing themselves, they just create an environment in which it’s likely to happen.’

‘Right, anything else?’

‘There are limitations. In magic there always are. Firstly, the person who cast the curse has to be close by. Nobody’s sure why, it’s just part of the recipe. One of the factors that has to happen for the curse to trigger. Victim plus attacker plus external magical force equals
boom.
It’s the rules. Also, the curse can be reversed, but the victim has to stay alive long enough to do it. It’s like a game of Black Queen.’

Toby shrugged. ‘I’m not that up on card games.’

‘No? Brilliant! We should play strip poker! I bet you have really funny pants.’ She screwed her eyes up and stared at him again. ‘Do they have cartoon characters on them?’

‘No,’ Toby replied.

‘Don’t believe you!’ Cassandra laughed.

‘Black Queen,’ she said, ‘is a game where you take cards off one another, trying to make up pairs and stuff but the real object is not to get stuck with the Queen of Spades. If you’re left with that as your only card you’re dead! Well, not dead, not unless you play
really
competitively. That’s how you lose, though. Curses are the same. It’s dealt to the victim and they’re stuck with it unless they manage to hand it to someone else, preferably, unless you’re just horrid, the person that gave it to you in the first place.’

‘And how do you do that?’

‘Well, that’s where the idea of a digital curse is even more freaky. Traditionally, the curse is written on a piece of paper. That piece of paper is then given to the victim. It can’t just be slipped into their pocket or something, they have to actually accept it. You can be cunning about it, obviously. Say you sent it to someone by registered post so they have to sign for it, they open the envelope, the curse is inside it, you know? There are ways of sneaking it onto people, but the rules are strict – there has to be some kind of acceptance from the victim.’

‘Pressing the button on your mobile that opens the text message for example,’ said Shining.

‘Yeah, I guess that’s close enough. There is at least an act of acceptance. Then, once you have it, the only way to escape it is to pass it back in the same manner. So you have to get the person who sent it to you to accept it back.’

‘Which they’re unlikely to do,’ said Toby.

‘Well, no, you’d have to be really, really clever about it. Again, it’s all about acceptance. Say you dropped the piece of paper and someone else picked it up. That doesn’t count. It wasn’t an active act of exchange, yes? The person casting the curse usually takes a few safety measures too, tries to build in a self-destruct, you know? So, the piece of paper is likely to get caught by wind, or fall in the fire.’

‘It has a life of its own?’

‘No, but it’s the same as the world changing around the victim, becoming an environment where something horrible is likely to happen. The world around the curse is likely to get hostile too, accidents will happen.’

‘But if the curse is being sent by SMS,’ said Shining, ‘and the phone destroys itself on receipt of the message …’

‘Then you couldn’t text it back,’ Cassandra agreed, ‘you’re stuck with it. Dead man walking.’

a) Piccadilly Line, Northbound, London

They ate their food and said their goodbyes to Cassandra, who did her best to ignore them.

‘There’s no need to go rushing off,’ she said. ‘I’m free as a bird. Why not go and have some more fun? We could go on a boat trip? Or the aquarium! Or the London Eye! I’ve never been on that!’

‘Nor should you,’ said August, ‘unless you want to end up in an alternate dimension. It’s nothing but a portal to other worlds built by the Illuminati.’

Cassandra skipped on the spot in ecstasy. ‘I knew it! Brilliant! Let’s go and blow it up.’

‘Another day, perhaps. We really must go.’

Eventually accepting that she wasn’t going to get her own way, she agreed to look into the curse in more detail and strolled off in a sulk.

‘She’s a handful,’ said Toby as they joined the Piccadilly Line at Leicester Square to head back to the office.

‘Isn’t she?’ agreed Shining. ‘Knows her stuff, though. We’ll see if she comes up with anything we can use.’

‘It all seems a bit grim,’ said Toby. ‘Death by remote control. An assassin’s dream.’

‘It certainly is, though usually the casting of curses comes with a weighty risk. It’s generally accepted that the more you interact with such forces the more aware of you they become. The more aware of you they are, the higher the price you might one day pay.’

‘Like a radiologist developing a tumour.’