The Revolution (38 page)

Reaching forward, I hold his right hand in mine. “Fight for them now, Kaz. This is your chance to do what you didn’t get to do before. You may call my heart soft, but you fought for me. Before you loved me, you fought for me. That’s who you are. That’s the man you are. Your family is back and this is your chance to find your way back.”

“What if I don’t want them back in my life?”

Covering his hand that rests on my thigh, I feel safe talking to him about this. Someone has to and he’s open to hearing my thoughts. “I think you do more than you let on.”

Turning to look out the window again, he says, “Maybe.”

My phone rings. My lawyer. I hired a business lawyer while in the hospital. I knew there would be “stuff” to deal with that I needed to have handled for me. “Hello.”

“Lara, I’ve got news.”

Grabbing hold of the door handle, I brace myself and turn my back to Kaz. He has enough problems of his own to continue to take on mine. “And?”

“He confessed to the police.”

“Mark did?”

“Yes. He’s now being held in county until a judge can make a ruling in his case.”

Stunned. I blink several times. “What did he confess?”

“To taking you against your wil—”

“Kidnapping?”

“Sort of.”

“Sort of?” I close my eyes and focus on my breathing.

“You walked out of the club willingly, Lar—”

“Because he threatened to hurt Kaz.”

The sound of disappointment fills the line. “He’s going to fight. You know that.”

“What else?” I snap.

“He admitted that he tried to commit suicide.”

Correcting him, I ask, “You mean homicide?”

“He’s arguing temporary insanity and that he gets treatment instead of prison time. There are still a few outstanding issues with his case.”

“He’s going to win. I know it.”

“We can hold out hope, present the evidence and your testimony from the hospital.” There’s a pause. “He has very good lawyers.”

“If he’s found guilty on the charges, how long will he serve?”

“That’s for the judge to decide based on the state laws, his confession, and the charges filed against him. Your statement will be used, but with his confession on the record, you shouldn’t have to testify. I have good news though.”

“I need good news right now.”

“The restraining orders against Kaz and Derrick have been dropped. Yours remains in place against Mark.”

“Okay. I’ll tell him.”

“Look, Lara, we’ve presented a file backing our recommendation for a longer sentence. I would recommend putting this behind you and moving forward the best you can at this stage. It’s out of your hands. I’ll keep in touch with details as things move forward, and I suspect they will fairly quickly now. Lie low. The media will hear of the confession within hours and they’ll be looking for a statement from you. Don’t say anything. Direct them to me.”

“Okay.”

“Take care of yourself and we’ll be in touch soon.”

“Thank you.” When I hang up, I peek back at Kaz.

His gaze is burdened, his shoulders stiff. “What’s going on?”

That is the million-dollar question. I have no idea what is going on. How do I put this behind me when it still stands squarely in front of me? I can’t talk to Kaz about it now. He doesn’t need extra worry. Just give him the basics. “Mark confessed.”

“Really?”

I release a deep breath and relax for the first time in months. “I can finally move on.” Reaching over, I wrap my hand with his. “We can finally move on.”

Kaz moves across the leather seat and puts his arm around me. I rest my head on his shoulder and he kisses me. “Finally.”

I hope.

KAZ PACES.

Anxiety courses through him, his fingers tapping at his side, his jaw tensing, his eyes focused on the floor but his mind so obviously on something else.

I sit in the middle of the couch in the living room and watch, giving him peace before the storm arrives. The gate buzzer rings his phone. He stops and looks at me before punching in the code. I see his lips purse and he blows out. Then he comes and sits next to me. “So this is it,” he remarks and looks down at his shoes.

“What do you want, Kaz?”

“I want to believe that we can be a family again.”

I kiss his shoulder. “It’s not about believing. It’s about knowing. You know deep down they love you. They were put in an impossible situation. I don’t think they chose him over you. They chose to survive the best they knew how.”

“I feel betrayed.”

Putting my arm around him, I whisper, “I know. You have every right to feel that too. Just don’t let that feeling make decisions for you. This is a new opportunity. You can take or leave it, but at least listen—openly—with your heart and head.”

A knock on the door pulls us back to the moment. He pats my legs and we kiss quickly. I stand when he goes to answer the door.

It’s not a boisterous reunion in the entryway, but quiet and cautious on both sides. Kaz hugs his mother and then his sister bringing tears to everyone in the room. He leads them into the living room and introduces me, “This is Lara Kessler, my girlfriend. My mother, Vera Petrowski, and my sister, Katerina Petrowski.”

I reach forward to shake their hands. Despite their smiles, they don’t accept right away, but then I realize the mistake I’ve made. Oh my God. They’re royalty. Maybe I insulted them by not curtsying. So I try my best to recall every Disney movie I ever saw with a princess in it, and curtsy.

Kaz chuckles and reaches down to take my arm. “No, you don’t have to do that.”

His mother and sister are giggling. Rochelle is laughing.

Shit.

“I wasn’t sure.”

Kaz rubs my lower back. “It’s okay.” He signals to the sofas and chairs. “Let’s sit.”

His mother eyes the piano and asks him something in Russian.

Kaz says, “English.”

Tension sucks the air out of the room with that one word. I feel I should go, that I’ve become an obstacle for them to climb their way back into each other’s lives. His mother glances to me, and smiles when she looks at him. “Do you still play?”

“Occasionally,” he responds not missing a beat. I’ve gotten to know Kaz well enough to read the emotions he tries to bury. His expressive eyes always reveal his true feelings.

He’s trying so hard to keep them out, to keep them at a distance, to protect himself. His mother’s interest is natural though he’s fighting receiving it. His reluctance to pretend he’s not hurt is also natural. Was it only his talent that held them together? If that’s all that bound them together, it’s also what tore them apart. If they only understood how fighting for them effectively sabotaged his ability to play. And he lost them anyway. With a shattered hand, he left, but the true shattering was in his heart.

When he looks at me, I see more pain. Conflict.

Perhaps sensing his unease, Kaz’s mother asks me where the restroom is, and I direct her to the guest bathroom. She says nothing until she comes out, and then I see steel in her expression, one so similar to her son.

“You love my son.”

“With all my heart,” I answer. She closes her eyes and then a wistful smile overtakes her beautiful face.

“I’ve never forgiven myself for letting him leave. I’ve never stopped loving him, praying he was safe and happy. Seeing him… happy…”

I want nothing more than to reassure her, but I can’t make it about her when I need to protect him. “I think he wants you back in his life, but he needs answers. He feels abandoned. But he also needs honesty. Don’t lie to him to get back in his good graces. You need to apologize.”

“I failed him for so many reasons he has never known.” She whispers, “I’m so incredibly proud of him for what he did. So proud of him for the man he has become.”

“Tell him.”

My gaze lifts over her shoulder and I can tell from Kaz’s expression that he heard her. As we slowly walk toward him, I see him take a deep breath, possibly for courage to attempt reconciliation.

“I haven’t played much over the years,
Mamasha
.” He takes one of his guitars from the corner and wraps the strap around his neck. “I taught myself to play guitar. It was more portable.” Shrugging while he strums, he says, “I think I’m a better guitarist these days and my work keeps me on the road. I’ve seen the world with the band.”

His sister perks up. “You are friends with Johnny Outlaw?”

All eyes in the room turn toward her, then a small backing of laughter replaces the heavy. Kaz nods while smiling. He rubs the back of his neck and says, “Yes, but I’m not sure how I feel about my sister asking about him.”

She’s about to say something, a smile appearing and then disappearing just as quick and she hesitates as if she isn’t sure she can joke with him. But a determination I’ve seen set in his eyes flashes in hers and she slips into a typical girl. “He’s dreamy.”

“He’s married,” Kaz counters.

She shrugs. “Still nice to look at.”

“Let’s make sure he never finds out you said that.”

I tease, “Kaz has many admirers himself.”

Katerina laughs but makes a sour face. “I can never see my baby brother as a what do you call them—heartbeat?”

I jump in again. “Heartthrob. And that he is indeed.”

Kaz frowns. “Hey! I’m right here.” He may be griping from the teasing but I can tell he enjoys the back and forth with his sister. It’s apparent he missed the camaraderie that comes so naturally between siblings.

His mother smiles. “They always fought. It’s good to hear it again.” She hiccups a small sob, and I can see how much this has broken her. Losing her child. Losing her family.

Katerina pats her arm lovingly. “We went through a lot with
Otets
. His death and funeral seemed easy in comparison.” She looks at Kaz. “I hope you understand why we stayed.”

“I don’t,” Kaz replies, his pain finally cracking in his voice. “I’ve never understood why you would stay under those conditions.”

His mother says, “We would have been penniless. We would have had to leave Russia. Where would we go?”

“Anywhere. We would have survived together.” He stands and walks to the piano. Tapping one key twice, he looks back at them, and adds, “I’ve done well?”

I don’t know why he’s asking the question. It’s obvious he’s done well on his own. Maybe… my heart starts to ache for him. Maybe he still needs acceptance from them, reassurance for the little boy inside him that he has made them proud.

His mother stands and walks to him. Leaning against the other side, she says, “You’ve done well, my son. You were meant for greatness. It’s who you are. You have a good life?”

“I’ve had a good life.”

“I was living the fate life gave me. I was too old to survive without any comfort. Your sister…” She looks down, shame breaching her soft features. “I told her to stay. I promised to find her a good husband and that she’d live a good life.” When she looks to her daughter, they both have tears in their eyes. “I should have sent her away. She should have gone with you. She’s had a life, but not an easy one. With the Petrowski last name, there’s always interest in our family. Katerina is single and beautiful. The media hounds her. They call her cold as ice. She’s not. Her father…”

“I’m fine,” Katerina demands, standing this time. “It doesn’t matter what has happened. It’s time we heal what we can.” She walks to Kaz and cups his face. “You were right to leave. You got out. Look at you and the beautiful life you’ve created for yourself. I’m so proud of you, Kazimir.”

Holding her upper arms, Kaz softens before us. “You have money, right?”

“We have more money than we can spend.”

The insecurity in his voice is heartbreaking. “You’re here for me?”

She nods. “We don’t expect miracles. Healing takes time. But we don’t want to live without you any longer. We had no idea where you were until we were contacted by the press. And then suddenly, there you were. Right there in plain sight. My brother, the amazing musician.” She hugs him and when he embraces her, she says, “It’s okay if you’re not ready to be part of this family again, but please don’t close the door.”

His mother comes to them and wraps her arms wide around them. “This is what I’ve yearned for.”

Healing does take time, and together, I think they’ll be fine. Seeing them makes me miss my parents. I take my phone out and send them a text to come over.

The gate buzzer sounds again and Tommy says, “I’ll handle it.” He gets up and goes to the security camera and phone near the door. I hear him say, “Come on up.”

Tommy joins Rochelle in the kitchen. They’re talking in low voices and settle at the table. I turn my attention to Kaz and his family. His sister is looking me over. When she smiles, it’s kind, so I return one.

Somewhere in the conversation, his sister and mother apologize. He doesn’t need to hear the words, but I know he likes that they took responsibility. I like hearing them laugh and seeing the tears shed between them. Joy and love. No tension lives here.

Tommy goes to the door and when it’s opened, we all turn toward the voice I know instantly. “I refuse to stay away any longer. She’s my girl too.” Lane and his exaggerated arm flailing come my way. “Now where is she, you big handsome lug?”