The Road Warriors: Danger, Death, and the Rush of Wrestling (42 page)

It’s like I remember him saying to Paul and me one day while the three of us were driving to a show in the early Georgia Championship Wrestling days: “Hey, this is what I want you guys to put on my tombstone. ‘Here lies Hawk. He did everything, and everything did him in.’”

20

THE LAURINAITIS LEGACY

After Mike died, I continued by myself for the next couple of years. My itinerary became filled with autograph appearances and mixed tag matches with an assortment of local guys from each hometown I entered. It was extremely odd for a while not to have Hawk by my side and to have people everywhere kind of pat me on the back and offer their condolences.

That whole period of time was a mourning process not only for me but for the many fans of the Road Warriors who’d lost a little piece of their childhood, or any special time during their lives, because one of their heroes was gone.

It still didn’t seem quite real to me. I kept half expecting to turn around and see Hawk in full paint and spikes come storming up to me as “Iron Man” blasted.
Well, are we gonna go out there and bust a few heads or stand around here like a couple of confused clam heads?
Man, I could hear him clear as day. Still can.

In the spring of 2005, the WWE wanted to do a DVD anthology of Hawk’s and my career called
Road Warriors: The Life and Death of the World’s Greatest Tag-Team in Wrestling History
. For a couple of the matches, I was flown up to Stamford to record modern-day commentary along with Jim Ross. It was a great time getting a chance to call some of the Road Warriors’ greatest moments.

Being honored with our own anthology was like coming full circle. It took me back through my entire career and brought up feelings and memories I thought were buried with my partner. I decided to use my new good graces with the WWE to secure an agent position, but Stephanie McMahon, who was all grown up now and a powerful part of the company, suggested something different.

“Joe,” she said, “we want you to consider resurrecting the Legion of Doom with another partner we have for you.”

It was a terrible idea. I hated it. I should have said no.

I said yes.

By dangling the proverbial carrot of an agent’s position with World Wrestling Entertainment in front of my face, Vince and Stephanie led me right into a regrettable situation. They quickly paired me up with John Heidenreich, a six feet five, 300-pound German who was struggling as a singles performer.

Like so many times before, from the Hell Raisers with Kenski to the LOD 2000 with Droz, it was another try at establishing someone who needed a boost by strapping on a pair of shoulder pads and putting on the paint. In a word, the whole thing completely sucked. Everything was way off and worse than I expected, except for one thing: the people.

Right before my very first reappearance on
SmackDown
on July 14, Vince came up to me with a funny smirk and a classic old question he’d asked me many times over the years. “Are we going to hear a Road Warrior pop tonight out there, Joe?”

I laughed. “Well, you know. We’ll see what happens, Vince.”

When I walked out, it was like every other time I’d had in the WWF/E. The people jumped right out of their seats and saluted me with an ovation that made me think of Hawk and how he should’ve been there with me.

No matter how things ever went in my career, from the highest moments in the AWA, NWA, Japan, and the old WWF, the fans stayed with me like old friends. I will always love and respect them for that.

You know, everyone from the office guys to other wrestlers to bloggers can say whatever they want, good or bad, but in the end they
all
know exactly where Road Warrior Hawk and Road Warrior Animal sit in the grand scheme of professional wrestling tag teams: at the very top of the mountain. I’ll take that with me wherever I go for the rest of my life.

As I mentioned, the WWE’s attempt at bringing me back for an LOD reboot should’ve died during the idea stage. Here’s why: the only thing slightly reminiscent of the old team was my new partner’s unpredictable personality. John meant well, but due to a certain lifestyle we were all way too familiar with, it was always uncertain which Heidenreich would show up to work, if at all. Within a few months, he was released from the company.

From there I was paired up with Matt Hardy and, God bless him, he was a good businessman and a great team player who had the kind of work ethic that reminded me of me. I remembered working with him way back in ’98 when he and his brother, Jeff, were starting out in the WWF. When it came to working with Matt, we got along great, did the best we could, and probably both felt like we were in the wrong situation. It too quickly came to an end, and we parted ways, but Matt Hardy has nothing but my well-earned respect.

By the very dismal end of it all, they made me take the paint off and actually had me reprise my original Road Warrior gimmick from the Georgia days. I even had the jean shorts, chaps, and leather vest.

When I looked in the mirror I almost passed out.
What have I gone and done?

Somewhere Hawk was laughing.

It didn’t last long, and I thanked the Lord when they finally released me. And guess what? No agent position. No nothing. And you know what? It’s their loss.

If Vince ever wakes up one day and realizes he could have a gold mine of a tag team division like wrestling used to have, I know he’ll think of me and pick up the phone or have my brother do it.

You see, when I was released, Vince made sure to have my brother John, who was now head of talent relations, call and do the honors of firing me. Nice touch. How ironic is it that once upon a time I did everything in my power to get my baby bro into the wrestling business only to have him announce the end of my career years later? (It’s like something out of a
book
or something.)

With my wrestling career officially and finally retired into memories that fade more and more by the day, I could finally concentrate on the most important years for my family: the current ones.

After finishing up boot camp and being stationed in Bamberg, Germany, with the National Guard, Joey had been in the middle of seeing the world when the events of 9-11 compelled him to go over to Iraq. He had been on one of the very first missions to search for weapons of mass destruction.

A family goes through so much when they have a child involved in a war. Julie, James, Jessica, and I were always glued to the TV and waiting for any word from our hero. After serving several years in the Middle East conflict, my son finally came home safely.

Back home, Joey decided to go into the police academy in Dayton, Ohio. He’s now an officer in the area and, along with his beautiful wife, Andrea, gave his old man a precious little granddaughter named Claire. It’s official. I’m now Grandfather Animal.

James, of course, became an amazing high school football player as a linebacker and got a full ride to Ohio State University (OSU) in 2001. He was the first player from Minnesota since legendary NFL coach Sid Gillman in 1930 to receive a full scholarship to become a Buckeye. While at OSU, James did the Laurinaitis name proud, as always, by becoming a three-time Associated Press First-Team All-American and winning several prestigious awards, such as the 2006 Bronko Nagurski Trophy, the 2007 Dick Butkus Award, and the 2008 Lott Trophy.

In 2009 James was drafted to the St. Louis Rams as a linebacker and was honored with the Carroll Rosenbloom Memorial Award, given out each year to the team rookie of the year. And through it all, James is still the down-to-earth, bighearted Christian he was when he held my hand as a thirteen-year-old boy at the Living Word.

Jessica exploded with athletic talent in high school. In softball, she was a two-year all-state first team player. During her senior year, she didn’t commit a single error at shortstop and led the softball team in batting average two years straight.

Not only that, but Jessica, not to be outdone by James, stepped onto the football field for her high school’s annual all-girls powder-puff games. In her junior year, she came running at an angle at this one girl and hit her like Ray Lewis, separating her shoulder. The next year, she did the exact same thing to another girl, only this time she actually stepped on her opponent’s chest as she walked away. When it comes to Jessica, Joey and James will be the first to tell you, she’s an absolute
stud
.

It was in ice hockey, though, that Jessica really found her calling. Overall, her high school career at Wayzata looked like this: four years varsity, all-conference honorable mention her freshman and sophomore years, captain her senior year, and all-state first team her junior and senior years. Get the picture? As of this writing, Jessica is now in her freshman year at St. Olaf College, where she’s going to continue challenging herself on the rink and in her academics. Don’t be surprised if you see Jessica make a big name for herself as an interior designer in the near future as well.

With all of our babies out of the house now, Julie and I are excited to see what the future holds for our amazing Laurinaitis family. At the end of the day, when Julie and I lie down together at night, we always talk about how blessed our time together so far has been. We have our health. We have each other. We have three beautiful children and a sweet little granddaughter to make the holidays at our house a PPV-quality event. And it’s for all of those reasons and much, much more that I thank the Lord Jesus Christ.

As far as the Road Warriors legacy goes? Well, simply put, when I think back over the twenty years that Hawk and I were together, I’m proud of what we accomplished. When we came in, we were big, tough kids with attitudes, but people recognized the raw talent we had. People like Eddie Sharkey, Ole Anderson, and Giant Baba gave us golden opportunities that, with the guidance of Paul Ellering, we ran with all the way to the bank.

I’ve said it before, but it has to be said one more time. When Mike and I were coming up,
no one
with so little time in the ring was given that kind of push. We were absolutely blessed to have been given the seeds of an amazing gimmick that would take us around the world ten times over.

Today I’m convinced that if Hawk and I were just now breaking into the business as the Road Warriors, the result would be exactly the same. We would become the greatest tag team in professional wrestling history.

AFTERWORD

THE IT FACTOR

If ever in history a tag team had the “it factor,” that unique something attracting fans and friends at every turn, it was the Road Warriors. Some of Joe’s professional wrestling peers whom he is honored to call lifelong friends offered their perspectives on working with Joe and Mike at various stages in their careers. Read on as these eleven all-time greats in the business reflect on their experiences with the indomitable Road Warriors:

“Nature Boy™” Ric Flair®

“The American Dream” Dusty Rhodes

Bret “The Hitman” Hart

“Rowdy” Roddy Piper

Booker T

Rob Van Dam

Jim “J.R.” Ross

“The Russian Nightmare” Nikita Koloff

“The Living Legend” Larry Zbyszko

Sean “X-Pac” Waltman

Terry “Warlord” Szopinski

“Respect” is the only word that comes to mind when I think of them. I would like to thank each of these professional wrestling greats once more, here in print, for definitively placing a loud, collective exclamation point on this testament of Animal and Hawk.

—Andrew William Wright

“NATURE BOY
^™
” RIC FLAIR
^®

One of the most successful professional elements Animal and Hawk had was that their characters matched their personalities. They
were
the Road Warriors. Honestly, I never called them anything else. Some guys tried to be something they’re not, but not those guys. Hawk especially was just as charged up and loud out of the ring as he was in it and was definitely the wilder of the two. Joe was the Milder Warrior, so to speak, and that’s exactly why they did so well together, both professionally and personally.

I remember meeting them when they first came into Georgia. They were men. Sometimes you talk to twenty-one-year-olds, and they’re still kids. Not Animal and Hawk. They were respectful, possessed positive attitudes, and had a huge presence backstage in every way. And back then, believe me, wrestling was a tough, man’s man business. They never complained, always worked hard, and were in great shape.

For a couple years there, it seemed like I was wrestling them every night in six- and eight-man tag matches. I loved every second of it.

I think the Road Warriors are the most recognized name in the history of tag team wrestling, and more importantly, Animal and Hawk were great guys—just fantastic people. Animal used to buy my kids toys in Japan and take them to my house, and I’ll never forget it. I’ve got nothing but great thoughts of Joe Laurinaitis and Mike Hegstrand.

Oh, and Joe? I know you’re reading this. I didn’t forget about Terry Funk and the hotel door in Japan back in ’85. You still owe me $1,500!

“THE AMERICAN DREAM” DUSTY RHODES

The Road Warriors revolutionized the way we all looked at characters in our industry. It was amazing for me to have had the opportunity to mentor Joseph and “Hank” (my nickname for Hawk) when they first came in, knowing they were so fresh and new, especially with that entrance music, that there’d be imitations. You know, there would be other guys throwing big clotheslines or maybe wearing spikes, but none were as powerful and devastating, not only in the ring but to the television audience at home and in terms of generating revenue.

Joe and Hank were my “babies,” as I used to call them, and were just as much a part of me as I was part of them. In the early days at the TBS studio, they’d always come running back after their match to get my thoughts; it was endearing. They were just so excited and wide open about everything. It was also clear to me that Hank was running wild like James Dean while Animal was the captain of the team,
if you will
.